Back to the dream
by JaneB
Summary: A different path for JR and SE on the Dream Season
1. Chapter 1

**SOUTHFORK**

This story takes place during the dream season the morning after the wedding of Pam and Mark. JR has just told Sue Ellen that he intends to go into Ewing Oil to meet with Angelica Nero; he kisses her as he gets into the car. Sue Ellen watches his car drive out of the gates. She silently stands on the driveway thinking back to the night before when she had begged him not to go, reminding him that she loved him and didn't care whether they lost Ewing Oil or not. However he had insisted that he needed to do this, he needed to secure Ewing Oil, and he didn't want to be a failure. Sue Ellen told him he wasn't a failure that he had a wife and son who loved him very much but JR wouldn't listen and finally she gave up the argument. Last night they had laid wrapped tightly in each others arms, JR had tried to reassure her that everything would be alright, that he would come straight home to her after the meeting but Sue Ellen was afraid she knew how dangerous Angelica could be and this meeting was not going to be that simple. She asked him if she could go with him but he had said no. Now standing alone on the driveway she felt sick with worry; she silently prayed for him to safely return to her. After realizing that she could no longer see his car she returned to the table where Miss Ellie and John Ross sat. She smiled as she saw John Ross put yet another doughnut into his mouth

"Hey what did I tell you" she said "No more doughnuts"

"Mom!" John Ross replied

Miss Ellie laughed, Sue Ellen soon found herself laughing too.

"How long will JR be?" Miss Ellie asked

"He promised not to be long" Sue Ellen replied "But you know JR and Ewing Oil"

**JR'S CAR**

Meanwhile the traffic on the road was quiet, JR figured that he could be back at Southfork within the hour; he wanted to get back to Sue Ellen. Suddenly the thought of Sue Ellen made JR want to stop the car, finding a quiet layby he turned in. He turned off the ignition and sat there thinking about the last few days which he had spent with Sue Ellen; he thought about the night of the fundraiser when he had promised her that he would make a real commitment to her; a promise he didn't plan to break. He put his head back against the headrest, what was he doing now? he thought; she had pleaded with him not to go, repeatedly told him that she loved him and that she didn't care about Ewing Oil why then was he going to the Office on a Sunday instead of spending the day with his family. He realized that all she ever wanted from him was for him to love her and only her; this was a new start for them, a chance to be a real family with perhaps more children something he had always wanted. Closing his eyes he made a decision, he knew what was important to him. He then picked up the car phone and dialed Harry McSween's number and told him that he wouldn't be at Ewing Oil; that he would ensure that the doors were opened to let the police in before Angelica got there. Harry told him that he would phone him that evening to tell him what had happened. After finishing the phone call JR turned the car around and headed back to Southfork.

**SOUTHFORK**

Sue Ellen and John Ross had decided to go for a walk; Sue Ellen knew it would do her no good being in the house thinking of JR and wondering what was going to happen to him. John Ross carried his football in his arms. They reached the lake and began to play catch.

"Momma why did daddy have to go to the office?" John Ross asked

"He had an important business meeting he couldn't get out of" Sue Ellen replied

"I wanted him to spend the day with us" John Ross said "Are you two going to get divorced again"

"What made you ask that?" Sue Ellen said

"Because daddy prefers going to the office instead of spending time with us" John Ross said

"Hey, he promised he would be back by 11 o'clock and then we can go out" she replied, hoping that JR would keep his promise.

"Do you love daddy" John Ross asked

"Yes" Sue Ellen replied

"Does he love you" John Ross said

Sue Ellen thought, that was the million dollar question, did JR love her or were they just words he used to get her to do what he wanted. She looked at her son watching her waiting for an answer

"Yes" she softly said "He loves us both"

Meanwhile JR had parked his car and got out, seeing Miss Ellie and Clayton on the patio he walked towards them.

"You're back early" Miss Ellie said

"Change of plan" JR replied "Where's Sue Ellen and John Ross?"

"They went for a walk by the lake" Clayton replied

"Okay, I'm going to get changed and go and find them" JR said

Ten minutes later JR had got changed out of his suit and went back downstairs. It was a beautiful warm day with a gentle breeze. As he walked towards the lake he heard the sound of laughter. He smiled to himself knowing that he had made the right choice, this is where he was supposed to be with Sue Ellen and John Ross; Ewing Oil could wait. He approached the lake and stood by a tree watching John Ross and Sue Ellen play. He thought back to the night of Bobby's death and how he had berated Sue Ellen for not being at the hospital. He had destroyed her in front of his mother and Clayton, calling her an unfit mother and a poor excuse for a human being. He wished he could take those words back, he had been so upset that he had taken his anger out on her when she hadn't deserved it, she was a warm loving human being who if he had let her would of helped him through his grief, he also told himself that she was the better parent, he loved John Ross but if he had got custody of him and John Ross had wanted to live with Sue Ellen, he knew he wouldn't have let him. She did what was best for their son regardless of what she wanted. Looking at her he thought his heart was going to burst with love and pride, she had come so far. Finally she had managed to conquer her alcohol problem, although he knew he was partly to blame for that, she was still attending AA meetings and he wanted to support her in any way he could. After five minutes of watching his family he called out to them.

"Hey you two, can I join you" he shouted

John Ross swung round "Daddy!" he shouted running towards him.

JR picked him up and walked towards Sue Ellen. In her eyes he saw a look of love as she walked towards him. JR put John Ross down and Sue Ellen ran into his arms. He lifted her off her feet and kissed her.

"I'm sorry" he said

Sue Ellen looked at him curiously.

"I put Ewing Oil before you" he said "I promised you that I would never do that to you again"

"Did you cancel the meeting" Sue Ellen asked

"No, the police are going in my place" JR said "Harry McSween going to phone me tonight and tell me what happened"

Sue Ellen looked at him "It will be okay" she said "As long as we have each other and John Ross, nothing else matters"

JR held onto her tightly "That's all I needed to hear" he said "I love you"

"I love you too" she said "So much"

"Hey you guys" John Ross said "Remember me?"

The couple looked at their son; JR smiled and picked him up lifting him onto his shoulders. He then wrapped his arm around Sue Ellen and together they strolled back to the ranch.

"Okay what do you guys want to do today?" JR asked

"You promised that we could visit the amusement park" John Ross replied

"And I guess I've got to go and the rides with you" JR laughed

Sue Ellen looked at him and smiled "Of course, what are fathers for" she said

"Don't supposed you're going to join us?" JR replied

Sue Ellen laughed "No way! I'm scared of heights" she said

Halfway back to the ranch, JR set John Ross back on the ground and the couple watched their son run on ahead.

"He looks happy" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "He's got what he always wanted his mom and dad together" she said

"What about asking momma and Clayton if they want to join us?" JR asked

"Of course" Sue Ellen replied

They approached the patio table where Miss Ellie and Clayton were sitting playing cards.

"Hey, how would you like to come out and spend the day with us" JR said

"Where are you going?" Clayton asked

"Our son informs us that he wants to go to the amusement park" Sue Ellen said

"Yes and I need someone to go on the rides with me" JR said "Since my wife claims she's scared of heights"

"When are you leaving?" Miss Ellie asked

"Half an hour" JR said as he and Sue Ellen walked into the house.


	2. Chapter 2

**Ewing Oil **

Angelica Nero slipped past the security guard and made her way towards Ewing Oil. JR thought he was one step ahead of her but she would show him differently. She was relieved to see that there was noone in the reception area when she arrived, so she quickly hid the briefcase she was carrying under the desk of one of the secretaries. The bomb which had been placed in there was timed to go off in quarter of an hour, hopefully she would be well clear of the building by then, as she only intended to stay a few minutes with JR. As she turned the handle of the door to JR's office she thought she heard a noise coming from one of the other offices but decided to ignore it. As she entered the office JR was sat in his chair with his back towards her, however when he turned around she realized that it wasn't JR. She had been tricked.

Harry McSween summoned in the officers who were waiting in Bobby's old office, they handcuffed her, read her rights and then escorted her downstairs. She tried to struggle but it was no good, she silently cursed JR Ewing.

Waiting downstairs in her car was Mandy Winger, she saw the police take Angelica away and thought that JR must still be in his office. She knew if she could just talk to him she could convince him that she was the one he wanted and not Sue Ellen. She was younger and prettier and she wasn't an alcoholic. She waited a further five minutes in her car, then plucked up the courage to enter the building. She too, managed to sneak past the Security Guard. She walked into the reception area and called JR's name there was no reply, on opening the door she heard a mighty explosion come from behind her, the force of the explosion shattered the door of JR's office and she found herself forced into the room and trapped by the door. Glass from the window flew in her direction and hit her in the face. She tried to scream for help but there was noone to hear her.

**An Amusement Park**

For the past hour JR had spent the time riding the stomach churning rides with John Ross. His stomach pleaded with him to stop although the pleading tones of his son encouraged him to carry on. Sue Ellen, Clayton and Miss Ellie watched them.

"JR seems to be enjoying himself" Clayton said

Sue Ellen looked towards her husband whose face was turning a light shade of green.

"I don't know I think he needs rescuing, I say it's time we got some lunch" she replied

As JR and John Ross got off their last ride, Sue Ellen walked towards them.

"Hey you two it's time for some lunch" she said

"Mom, I want to go on some more rides" John Ross complained

"Later" Sue Ellen said

JR crept up behind her, putting his arms around her waist he whispered in her ear "You're taking him on the next ride" he smiled

Sue Ellen reached up and put her arms around his neck kissing his cheek "We'll see" she said

The family found a café and sat down to enjoy lunch. JR watched his son happily munch his way through two hog dogs.

"How the hell does he do that, after riding those rides" JR thought

"Daddy aren't you hungry?" John Ross asked

"Somehow those rides have taken away my appetite" JR replied

Miss Ellie laughed "Never thought I would see the day when JR couldn't face food" she said

After lunch Miss Ellie and Clayton took John Ross to look for the ice cream van leaving JR and Sue Ellen alone. Hand in hand they walked silently around the park and found a secluded area to sit down in. Sue Ellen looked at JR; wondering what he was really thinking about.

"Are you okay?" she asked

JR stretched out and lay with his head in her lap.

"I am now" He said "Our son has worn me out"

Sue Ellen laughed "Bet you wished you had gone to the office" she said

JR was silent; the truth was that Ewing Oil was the last thing on his mind. Sue Ellen had promised that whatever happened today they would face it together; and for once in his life that was all he cared about; being together with her and their son.

"No" JR said "At this precise moment in time, I don't care about Ewing Oil, I'm just enjoying being here with you"

"What's going to happen now that the police have Angelica" Sue Ellen asked

JR looked at her "I don't know" He said "Hopefully it won't affect Ewing Oil that much, with her safely locked away everything may turn back to normal"

"What's normal" she laughed "Come on admit it, you've never done things by the book" she smiled

"Hmm, but from now on I'm going to start, I put my life and my family's life in danger getting involved with her but not anymore, you're too precious to me" he said

"I love this new you, I just hope it lasts" she replied kissing him.

"I told you people can change" JR said "And I wanted you back and I knew I had to become a better husband to do that"

"After Bobby's death I felt that I had lost you too. You wouldn't let me comfort you and I knew that you still blamed me for not being here when John Ross was taken to hospital" she said

JR closed his eyes. He felt so guilty about the way he had treated her over the years; there was so much he wanted to say to her but something inside of him always stop him from pouring out his heart to her. Why couldn't he trust himself to let go off his true feelings.

"Sue Ellen…." He said "It's over I promise I will never hurt you again"

Sue Ellen kissed him "Come on, let's go and find our son"

The family stayed at the amusement park for another couple of hours. Sue Ellen joined JR and John Ross on a few of the rides while Miss Ellie and Clayton strolled around the park. At five o'clock they drove back to Southfork.

**Southfork**

After the family had eaten dinner and John Ross was safely tucked up in bed, JR went down into the den. He knew he had to phone Harry McSween to find out what had happened with Angelica. After a fifteen minute conversation JR put the phone down, sat back in his chair and closed his eyes unaware that Sue Ellen had entered the room.

"JR what's wrong?" she asked

JR sighed and opened his eyes "Everything" he replied "Apparently they arrested Angelica, she cursed me a bit but they've got her safely locked away" he said

"That's good isn't it?" Sue Ellen said

"Harry seems to think that he can come up with enough on her to put her away for a few years, but once she's out, who knows what she will do for revenge" JR said "Harry also told me that he's trying to keep Ewing Oil out of the equation"

"Good to have friends in the right places" Sue Ellen smiled

"You could say that" JR replied "However quarter of an hour after they had left the building the place was rocked by an explosion. The police, fire services and paramedics have been down there today. Everyone's been trying to get into contact with me"

"Sorry JR" Sue Ellen said

"Hey, don't be, there was nowhere else I'd rather be than with you and our son" JR said "And as we haven't had the television or the radio on we didn't know what was going on"

"What damage has been caused?" Sue Ellen asked

"Nothing that's not repairable, I'm going to have a look tomorrow" JR said "However there was someone trapped in the explosion"

"Who?" Sue Ellen asked

JR sighed "Mandy" he said "She must have come up looking for me"

"But I thought it was over between you two" Sue Ellen said

"Darlin', it was over a long time ago but she just wont take 'no' for an answer" JR said

"Has she been hurt badly" Sue Ellen asked

"Apparently her face has been cut badly by the glass from the window and her legs were trapped by the door, but I think she'll live. Harry said that the hospital told him that she keeps asking for me" JR said

"Do you want to see her?" Sue Ellen asked

JR looked at her "No" he said "All I want is you and John Ross"

"JR, you can see her if you want" Sue Ellen said

"There's no point" JR said "It's over, I've told her so many times, maybe now she'll face up to reality"

"We could face her together" Sue Ellen said

"You'd come with me?" JR asked

"If it stopped her going after my husband again I would" Sue Ellen said

JR looked at her and smiled "Do you fancy a walk, I could do with some fresh air" he said

"Okay" she smiled

JR wrapped his arm around her and they strolled out into the cool night air. It was still light so they decided to walk towards the lake. They came upon the treehouse with Bobby's grave nearby. They sat down and JR pulled Sue Ellen tightly towards him.

"What are you thinking?" Sue Ellen asked

"About life, how I wish things were different" JR said, he looked over towards Bobby's grave "I wish Bobby was here"

"So do I JR" she said "I miss him too"

"Do you think momma wishes it was me in that grave and not him?" JR asked

Sue Ellen looked at him and stroked his face "No sweetheart, no mother wants their child dead, no matter what they have done" she said "But I know she would do anything to have Bobby back"

"I remember the night he died, I begged him not to leave me" JR said "The last thing he said to us was 'be a family'" JR said "But I came home and tore a strip of you, I took all my anger out on you and I shouldn't have. I needed you to be there for me but I pushed you aside"

Sue Ellen had tears in her eyes "I know" she said

"I didn't mean those things" he said "You are the best mother John Ross could have; you put his needs first before what you want. And you're a warm loving human being who always manages to forgive me for whatever I do to you"

"That's easy" Sue Ellen replied "I love you"

"Then when you tried to talk to me after the funeral I sent you away" JR said "I didn't care what happened to you at that point because you were to blame for everything that had gone wrong, and without you at Southfork I could have Mandy"

Sue Ellen looked at him; what was going on in his mind she wondered. Why was he bringing this up now?

"Then when we found you in the detox centre that was the worse day of my life. I realized what I had done to you and I felt so guilty, momma told me I needed to sign the papers to commit you to the Sanitarium; she was right" JR said

"I hated being in that place, but it made me face what I was; I finally accepted that I was an alcoholic" Sue Ellen said

"I guess that was partly my fault" JR said "I drove you to it"

Sue Ellen was silent "I don't know it can also be inherited; my father was an alcoholic" she said

"Being married to your mother I'm not surprised" JR laughed

"JR!" she replied "My mother's okay in small doses"

"Sorry but its true" JR said

"When I came out of the sanitarium, she was there for me; I knew I couldn't go back to Southfork and she supported me" Sue Ellen said

"Why did you let John Ross stay at Southfork when you had custody of him?" JR asked

"I told you at the time; John Ross was happiest at Southfork, he wanted to stay and I knew if I forced him to come with me then I would be doing the same to him as my mother did to me" Sue Ellen said "My mother had my life mapped out for me from the age of 5 and what I wanted did not count. I wasn't prepared to do that to him"

"Did you ever consider going off with Dusty?" JR asked

"He wanted me to; however I couldn't leave Dallas not with John Ross here. At the end of the day it was a choice between him and John Ross and there wasn't really any competition; no matter what my son comes first" Sue Ellen said "What changed JR?"

"What do you mean" JR asked

"A year ago you hated me, you wanted me out of your life; all you cared about was John Ross and Mandy; now look at us" Sue Ellen said

"I don't know" JR replied "Mostly I saw you in a new light. The way you came back from rock bottom; you've changed so much. Then you did so well at Graison's research and I just fell in love with you. Suddenly I found myself spending nights with Mandy wishing that it was you I was holding in my arms"

"That must have been a bit of a disappointment for Mandy, she was expecting to become the next Mrs JR Ewing" Sue Ellen said

"All I wanted was you but I knew I had to change; so I did" JR said

"When did you really finish with Mandy?" Sue Ellen asked

"It was over a long time ago; but I tried to convince myself that it was her I wanted and not you. The night of the Oil Baron's ball when you showed up with your mother. You looked amazing; all I wanted to do was take you in my arms and dance the night away with you but I knew that I had hurt you so badly that you wouldn't want me so I pretended to be annoyed that you were there and of course Mandy was there; then you turned up at the Rodeo and won the Barrel Race; I knew you would; I felt an overwhelming sense of pride and love for you but I had to put those feelings out of my mind because I was with Mandy and I needed to love her, you were in the past. But do you want to know something stupid?" JR said

"What?" Sue Ellen replied

"Do you remember at the Rodeo I accused you of causing trouble and you told me that you didn't care if I threw Mandy into the Rodeo Ring and made love to her in front of everyone?" he said

"I remember" she replied

JR laughed "What I wanted to say, what I really wanted to say was that I'd sooner do it to you"

Sue Ellen laughed

"Then of course when you moved back to Southfork, Mandy was furious but I convinced her that it was for John Ross' sake that there was nothing between you and me anymore. However she decided that she would pay me back for that and started to see Cliff Barnes giving him information about me; when I found out I played along for a time; fed her useless information to see what would happen and sure enough it went straight to Cliff" JR said

"So you split up with her because she betrayed you?" Sue Ellen said

"No, not really I split up with her because I love you; Mandy was a fling, that's all she ever was to me" JR said

"When Angelica held that gun to you head when you were in Martinique, what was really going through your mind" Sue Ellen said

"Like I told you; that I would never see you again; I would never be able to tell you that I love you and was sorry about the way I treated you" JR said

"JR Ewing, you are the most infuriating man I've ever know!" Sue Ellen said "All I ever wanted was to love you and for you to love me and only me. Do you realize how much time we have wasted over the years?"

JR smiled "Not anymore though; the night of the Graison's Fundraiser I made a commitment to you and promised that you would be the only woman in my life and I meant it, from this moment on you are the only woman I want to be with" he said "It's taken me a long time to realize this but the one person who offered me unconditional love was standing right beside me; with all the power inside of me I'm going to make up for all the bad times; with every beat of my heart I love you Sue Ellen"

"I love you too" she replied "JR, you have to trust me; whenever you have a problem I want to be the first person you go to; I want to be the one who holds you in my arms and tells you that everything will be okay; I'm your wife but I also want to be your best friend; from this moment on we will face things together I don't want you bottling things up"

"Okay" JR said "But you know I'm no good at talking about my feelings"

Sue Ellen smiled "But you can learn and I promise that I will never hurt you; I will always listen to you and I'm always on your side; you will never know how much I truly love you" she said

"Oh I think I do" JR smiled "After all I've done to you, you're still here; you're one special lady" he said

Sue Ellen laughed and kissed him.

"Hey do you know our son wants to quit school and join me in Ewing Oil?" JR said

"I figure that would come up soon; he really enjoyed that day he spent in the oilfields with you" she replied "What did you tell him?"

"I told him to speak to you!" He laughed "Seriously, I said he needed to finish school and enjoy being a little boy. He's six years old; a year older than I was when I started at Ewing Oil but that's not what I want for him. I want him to grow up to know that I love him and he's not just my business partner and heir to Ewing Oil. I promised him I would still take him on trips to the oilfields when school is out; we might even be able to persuade you to join us"

"JR this is the man I want the rest of the world to see; the father who lovingly carries his son upstairs when he's fast asleep after visiting the oilfields; the father who reads his son bedtime stories; the gentleman who really does love his family and do anything for them. But you hide that side to you so well" Sue Ellen said "Then maybe the rest of the world will understand why I love you so much"

JR kissed her and an idea popped into his head

"Sue Ellen." He said "Marry me!"

"JR we are married" She replied

"I know but let's renew our vows and this time I will put a new wedding ring on your finger; a sign of a strong and everlasting love which will never ever be broken" he said

Sue Ellen looked at him; she felt her heart was going to burst "I love you so much; you really are trying to change I saw that today when you came back to us instead of going to Ewing Oil and yes I would love to marry you" she said

"How about New Years' Eve" JR said "A new beginning for a new year"

"Sounds perfect" she replied

"This time I'm going to make you so proud of me" JR said

"I already am" Sue Ellen smiled, she looked towards Bobby's grave "And so would Bobby be" she said

"Do you believe he's still with us?" JR asked

"Yes" Sue Ellen said "Maybe he's one of the stars that shine at night looking down on us and making sure everything is alright; maybe he's the breeze blowing through the trees; but I know he's still here; watching us, guiding us through life. As long as he lives within us in our memory he will never die"

JR looked at her "You really believe that"

"Yes" she said "I also know that Bobby loved you very much; there's also something else that Bobby would want and that is for you to stop antagonizing Pam; forget she's a Barnes; start treating her as a person in her own right, she's married to Mark now so please just treat her with some respect"

"Bobby still loved her didn't he?" JR said

"They were planning to remarry" Sue Ellen said "That was why he was at Pam's the morning he died; they had spent the night together and he was coming home to tell everyone that they were going to get married"

"I didn't know that" JR said

"Mark told me a while back" Sue Ellen said "So please be nice to Pam; if not for her sake do it for Bobby"

JR looked at her

"I know I'm asking a lot but please try" she said

"Okay!" he replied "I'll try"

"Hey, it's getting late we should go back to the ranch" Sue Ellen said

They both stood up and started walking back to the ranch. JR looked up at the stars beginning to shine in the sky.

"Do you really believe he's up there Sue Ellen?" JR asked

Sue Ellen looked up "Yes, I'm sure he is"

JR looked up at the stars "Bobby I love you" He said "Do you think he head me?"

Sue Ellen hugged him tightly "Of course he did"

They walked back towards the house. JR held Sue Ellen tightly; he really didn't want to let go off her. They found Miss Ellie and Clayton in the living room.

"How was your walk" Miss Ellie asked

"Fine" JR said "Have you heard the news?"

"No" Clayton said "We haven't had the television on"

"Well Angelica was arrested this morning but not before she planted a bomb inside Ewing Oil" JR said

"What" Clayton Said?

"The bomb exploded fifteen minutes after the police took her away" JR said "I'm going to look at the damage tomorrow"

"JR you should never have got involved with Angelica Nero" Clayton said

"I know that now" JR said "It's getting late, I'm going to bed"

"Night" Miss Ellie said

"Night Miss Ellie, Night Clayton" Sue Ellen said as she followed JR upstairs.

Before they entered their room they peeked into John Ross' room. They both laughed to find their son fast asleep with a pair of headphones on his head. Sue Ellen walked over to him and removed the headphones and gently kissed him.

"He loves listening to the tapes you made for him" JR said

"So I see, however they were supposed to be for when I wasn't at home and couldn't read him a bedtime story" she laughed "If I remember rightly he had two stories tonight!"

JR laughed "He's a chip of the old block" He said

"I hope not!" Sue Ellen smiled

They quietly closed John Ross' door and then entered their own room. JR held Sue Ellen in a tight embrace.

"For once in his life, Clayton is right, I put the whole family at risk when I got involved with Angelica; it could have been you or John Ross caught in that explosion" JR said

"JR, it's over; you have to learn by your mistakes and move on" Sue Ellen replied "Are you going into the office tomorrow?"

"I need to see what's happening" JR said "See what sort of damage has been done"

"Do you want some company?" Sue Ellen asked

JR thought for a moment; throughout their married life JR had kept her out of his business dealing and out of anything to do with Ewing Oil. He had to go through the bad times on his own but this was a new start for them and he wanted Sue Ellen by his side.

"I would love you to be there" He said "But don't you have to go to work"

"I have to pop in at some point but Mark and Pam are on their honeymoon, so I can go with you to the office first" she said "Maybe you can join me at Grayson's after and go through some ideas I have.

JR kissed her "Sounds good to me" he said

"Then perhaps after lunch we could go to the hospital to see Mandy" Sue Ellen said

JR looked at her in surprise "What!" he said

"On second thoughts make that before lunch, I don't think I could stomach seeing her before" Sue Ellen laughed

JR kissed her "We don't have to see her at all" he said

"Yes, but she's going to keep pestering you if we don't tell her once and for all that it's over" Sue Ellen said "It is over, isn't it?"

"You know it is" JR said "I love you and only you, from now on you're the only woman I want to be with"

Sue Ellen kissed him "Show me" she smiled

JR tenderly kissed her

"No wait" Sue Ellen said "I'm going to get changed" as she moved away from him into the bathroom.

JR let out a groan and fell onto the bed. "Hurry up then!"

Sue Ellen laughed at him, ten minutes later she walked back into the bedroom wearing her robe. JR walked towards her and took her in his arms.

"Mmm" he said "No idea what you're wearing this for" as he undid her robe, then slowly slipped it off her.

JR pushed her onto the bed and climbed on top of her; he worked his way down her body leaving no place untouched. Sue Ellen closed her eyes and let him love her; delighting in the feel of his tongue as he licked his way down her body. JR stopped at her inner thigh and looked at her. He then pushed his tongue between her and found her love button which he began to gently lick. Sue Ellen opened her legs wider to allow him better access and he began to suck on her, increasing his movements all the time. Finally she could take no more and reached for him.

"Haven't finished" He said

"I need you" she moaned "I can't hold on for much longer"

"Then don't" he smiled as he continued to lick her.

Sue Ellen finally let herself go; her juices flowing over JR's tongue. Finally JR stopped what he was doing and worked his way back up her body.

"JR let me help you out of those clothes" Sue Ellen laughed

"Be my guest" JR said

They rolled over so that she was on top of him. Sue Ellen decided she could take anymore and wanted him inside of her so she reached for his trousers. JR gently put his hand over hers.

"Not yet" he said "Start at the top"

Sue Ellen began my removing his shirt, and then just as he had done she kissed her way down his body. As her hand went to the zip of his trousers she undid them and gently took his manhood in her hands. She then began to stroke him. Once she had removed his trousers and socks she then went back her favourite part of him. Looking up at him she saw that he had his eyes closed, she then did the one thing she had never done for him before; she took him in her mouth. JR opened his eyes in shock; it was something he had never asked her to do as he thought it wasn't something you asked a lady to do. Sue Ellen continued her sucking motion until finally JR couldn't take anymore.

"Come here" he said

"No" Sue Ellen laughed "What's wrong, don't you like this?"

"Hell yes" JR said "But I'm cumming"

"What you waiting for" she laughed as she increased her actions.

JR couldn't take anymore and finally spilt his seed inside her mouth. Sue Ellen swallowed every drop, licking her lips afterwards. JR stretched out his arms for her and she climbed into them.

"That was amazing" he said "But where did you learn that"

"That would be telling" she laughed

"Your mother would be ashamed of you if she knew what you had just done" JR said "Ladies are not supposed to do that"

Sue Ellen laughed "I won't tell if you won't" she said

They lay locked in a tight embrace "Don't tell me none of your girlfriends have never done that to you" she said

JR grimaced "No, but it's not something I would of asked my wife to do" he said

"Is that why you needed them to do things with them that you felt afraid to ask me to do" she asked

"Partly and then there was the feeling of power; the thrill of the chase" he said

"Did you love them?" she asked

"Sue Ellen it was never about love; I had a family at home who I loved, they didn't mean anything" he said

"Make love to me again" Sue Ellen said

"My pleasure" JR replied and slowly they began to make love both enjoying the closeness of each other's body. When they were finished they lay wrapped in a tight embrace. JR watched at Sue Ellen drifted off to sleep. His thoughts went to the future and wondering what it would bring. He thought about how much he would love more children but something inside him told him it wouldn't happen. Sue Ellen had once told him that they would never have anymore children, hopefully one day he would be able to change her mind about that.

The following morning JR got up early and went into the shower while Sue Ellen was sleeping. While he was getting dressed Sue Ellen woke up.

"You're up early" she said

"Good morning" he replied "You know what they say the early bird catches the worm"

"Are you okay?" she asked

"Yes, just thinking about he mess I've made of Ewing Oil" he said

Sue Ellen got out of bed and put on her robe; walking over to JR she wrapped her arms around him.

"Everything will be fine" she said

"Hey, that robe looks better off you than on" he laughed

"You're terrible" she said "But seriously we'll get through today together"

"I had a great time yesterday, with the family at the park, I'm so glad I turned back home" JR said "We should do that more often"

Sue Ellen smiled "We will" she said "Right I'm going to get dressed"

After breakfast JR and Sue Ellen took John Ross to school and then went to Ewing Oil. As JR got out of the car, he looked up and saw the boarded up window of his office; remembering that the glass had shattered at the bomb's explosion. Sue Ellen walked over to him and took his hand.

"Come on let's go and see what the damage is" she said

The elevator was out of action so they had to walk up the stairs; on entering the reception area they saw at first hand what the explosion had done. The blast from the explosion had shattered the glass in the windows and splinters of glass lay on the floor, the furniture in the area was damaged. JR spent a couple of minutes with the police sergeant who was dealing with the incident. Sue Ellen walked over to JR's office and looked inside; it looked very much like the reception area. Finally JR was ready to leave. As they got into the car, JR turned to Sue Ellen and said

"I can't believe how much mess has been made"

"But that's all it is a mess, noone was seriously hurt" she replied "Once the police have finished you can start to put things back together"

"I noticed the portrait of daddy that was hanging in my office is ruined" he said

"Not necessarily" Sue Ellen said "We might be able to get it repaired"

"Maybe we should let Ewing Oil go" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at him "No, that isn't what you want, we'll get it back together again" she said

"Will you help me?" he asked

"Of course" she said "Like I told you last night I'm not just your wife I'm also your best friend"

"Where do you want to go now?" JR asked

Sue Ellen sighed "We could go to the hospital" she said

"You sure" JR asked

"Yes, let's get that woman out of our lives forever" she replied

About twenty minutes later they arrived at the hospital. JR reached for Sue Ellen's hand and squeezed it gently as they walked inside. As they approached Mandy's room Sue Ellen told JR to go in by himself.

"I don't want to" JR said "I thought we were going to do this together"

"I'll follow you shortly" she replied

JR walked into the hospital room. Mandy turned around when she heard him say her name. JR was stunned by what had happened to her face. The glass had implanted itself deep into her face and she was covered in deep scratches which had been sutured. Both her legs had been broken by the door crashing down on her.

"I knew you would come" she said

"What were you doing there?" JR asked

"I wanted to see you, to tell you that I was prepared to wait until you were ready to leave Sue Ellen" she replied

"I'm never leaving Sue Ellen; I told you I love her" JR said

"But I can make you happier than she can" Mandy replied

"Mandy it's over, in fact it never really started; I could never leave Sue Ellen for you" JR said "I only love her; she's the only woman I want to be with"

"You'll come back to me" Mandy said "You know you wont be able to resist me"

"Get out of Dallas" JR said "Just leave me and my family alone"

Sue Ellen listened by the closed door, softly she opened it and walked in.

"Take JR's advice and find someone of your own" Sue Ellen said

"JR doesn't love you, he loves me" Mandy replied

JR shook his head, reaching for Sue Ellen's hand he pulled her closer to him and planted a kiss on her cheek.

"You're wrong Mandy, Sue Ellen and I are going to renew our vows" JR said "I've made a commitment to her and I intend to keep it"

"JR…..please I can give you so much more than she can" Mandy cried

"Mandy I don't want you to come near me or my family again" JR said

"She'll never be enough for you" Mandy said "Cliff told me it would only last for a few months and then you'll be back knocking at my door"

"Mandy are you that desperate that you have to steal someone else's husband" Sue Ellen asked "Find someone of your own and leave my man alone"

"I'm staying in Dallas" Mandy said

"By the way, your apartment is up for sale" JR said

"You brought it for me" Mandy said

"Yes and now I'm selling it" JR said "You have two weeks to get out of there"

"At the moment I'm stuck in here, thanks to you" Mandy replied

"That isn't my problem" JR said "Just make sure you're moved out of that apartment by next month"

"And where do you suppose I live" Mandy said

"Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn" JR said "Goodbye Mandy, and just stay away from my family or I'll make you regret the day you ever heard the name JR Ewing"

"Sue Ellen don't think you've won, I'm going to get him back" Mandy said

JR and Sue Ellen walked out of the room hand in hand.

"You are sure this is what you want?" she asked

"Sue Ellen, there is no contest, she was just a plaything and I got bored with her" JR said "But the one person I can't get bored with is you"

"I love you" she said

"I love you too" JR said "More than words can describe"

They then went into the Grayson's Research for a couple of hours where Sue Ellen showed JR what she planned for the next fundraiser; JR told her he would talk to a few people and see what he could do to help. She then showed him around the Research Centre and explained what new projects they were undertaking. JR was so impressed with how she had changed.

"You're incredible" he said

"Thankyou" she replied "I never thought I would love working as much as I do, it just gives me a sense of independence and not just Mrs JR Ewing"

"It seems strange I mean you're great at spending money but you're also great at making it" JR laughed

"Call it my feminine charm" she laughed

"Hey I'm hungry" JR said "Let's eat"

JR drove them into town, after ordering they sat in silence for a while.

"What are you thinking JR" Sue Ellen asked

"Just about the past and my many mistakes" he replied "I've done some really horrible things to you"

"It's in the past" Sue Ellen said

JR looked at her; he thought he had never seen her looking more beautiful than she did at this moment. Suddenly the only thing he felt hungry for was her.

"You're are amazing; I'm just glad that you forgave me, I knew this time it wouldn't be so easy getting you back" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "Why do you say that"

Well for the first time ever, you were independent, you had Grayson Research, Jerry Kenderson and I realized you didn't need me" he said "I thought I had lost you; I remember the first Fundraiser I went to with you, I found myself totally captivated by you and that's when I realized that I was falling in love with you again"

"I don't think I will ever stop loving you JR" Sue Ellen said

"There are so many things I regret" JR said "Most of all the way I've treated you over the years and the time we've wasted; I want to make up for everything"

"JR, the past is behind us; all I want is a future with you and our son" Sue Ellen replied "Let's not waste anymore time"

"John Ross is growing up so fast" JR said "I missed out on so much of his growing up, I wish we could go back to when he was tiny"

"So do I" Sue Ellen said "We both missed out on his early days, that's what I feel so guilty about the way I rejected him when he was born"

"I think you've made up for that" JR said

JR went silent; thinking about how much of his son growing up he has missed, remembering the first time he held John Ross; and how his tiny son had helped him through the grief he felt at losing his own father.

"JR" Sue Ellen said

"Yes" JR replied

"What are you thinking?" she asked

"Just remembering the time I first held my son" he said "Sue Ellen I don't want John Ross to be an only child, I want another baby but I know you don't"

"What makes you think I don't" Sue Ellen said

"You told me some time ago" JR said

"That was then; I wasn't prepared to bring another child into our sham of a marriage" Sue Ellen said "But now it's different; you promised me a total commitment; I want a secure marriage filled with love and children"

JR smiled "Do you think we've left it too late?" He asked

"No" Sue Ellen said "But I don't want the pressure we had last time; let's wait and see what happens"

"Just think of all the fun we can have trying!" JR laughed

"Exactly" Sue Ellen said

"When do we start" JR asked

"I thought we already had" Sue Ellen laughed "But remember JR; this time I want things to be perfect; with all of my heart I love you and only you, promise me that you will never stop loving me"

"I promise" JR said "I'm going to make every day a happy one for you"


	3. Chapter 3

**A Dallas Jail (3 weeks later)**

Angelica walked about pacing her cell; she was fuming, she wondered what her associates were doing to get her out of this hole, not a lot by all accounts. She hated being locked in here. Somehow she would find a way out of her prison and then she would make people pay for this. Her first target was JR Ewing, he had set her up that morning in his office; she wondered if he had turned up late and become a victim to her little present she had left for him, but knowing JR probably not. However he had met his match with her; she was going to bring his little empire crumbling to the ground; by the time she had finished with him, he would be nothing.

**Southfork**

The sun streaming through the bedroom windows awoke JR, he looked at the sleeping woman by his side; she was still fast asleep; so he gently planted tiny kisses on her bare skin, still her eyes remained closed. JR thought back to their active night and decided that perhaps he had worn her out. Silently he got out of bed and crept into the bathroom hoping not to wake her. After he had gone Sue Ellen opened her eyes and lay in bed listening to the sound of the running water from the shower. Her hand went to her stomach; these past few days she had been feeling queasy but put it down to perhaps she had eaten. If things didn't improve in a few days she would go and see the doctor. She heard the bathroom door open and quickly closed her eyes. JR came out wrapped in his towel; looking towards the bed he sighed at the sight of his sleeping wife. He crawled back onto the bed and snuggled up to her, gently calling her name. Sue Ellen pretended not to hear him. A wicked grin spread across his face as he came up with a plan; knowing that Sue Ellen had the ticklish feet of anyone he had known, he worked his way to the bottom of the bed and lifting up the sheet he began to tickle her feet. Sue Ellen squirmed but refused to open her eyes; JR kept tickling her, suddenly he felt her kick him.

"Ow" he said

Sue Ellen opened her eyes and reached behind her for the pillow; finding it she chucked it at him.

"That's for waking me up!" she said

"You my darlin' were already awake" he said "I knew you were pretending to be asleep"

"Isn't a girl entitled to some sleep around here" she laughed

"You had enough" JR said "Now I want some playtime"

Sue Ellen rolled her eyes "You're incorrigible" she said "Beside you've just had a shower; you don't want to get all sweaty again"

"Actually if it involves working up a sweat with you, I don't mind" he laughed "Beside we can always take another shower"

"And what makes you think that I want you" Sue Ellen said

"Because I'm you loving husband who will do anything to please you" he replied

"Good so let me go back to sleep and finish the dream I was having" she said

"What were you dreaming about?" JR asked

"About my knight in shining armour coming to rescue me from this torturous relationship" she replied

JR looked at her "Are you serious?" He asked "So who was this knight"

"Well actually it was Dusty" she laughed

JR got up from the bed and walked towards the window; was she joking with him or did she still love the cowboy. He couldn't blame her if she did; he treated her better than he ever had done but he really wanted to make up for the past. Sue Ellen noticed the change in his mood and realized that maybe she had gone to far in teasing him. She got out of bed and walked towards him; wrapping her arms around his body. JR sighed at the softness of her touch. JR kept his back towards her. For a few minutes there was silence, finally Sue Ellen kissed the back of his neck.

"Look at me" she said

JR turned around

"Hey I was joking" she said

"Do you still love him; do you ever sleep by my side wishing it was him next to you?" JR asked, turning around to face her.

Sue Ellen looked him in the eye and said "With my hand on my heart, no"

"I wouldn't blame you if you did" JR said "He's treated you a lot better than I ever did"

"Sweetheart, I was only ever with him because I couldn't have you" she replied "I have always loved you and I know that I always will; beside Dusty loves the rodeo, he would never be happy being tied down with a family"

"Is that why you stayed, because you didn't want to go on the rodeo circuit with him" JR said

"JR you are not listening to me; I'm here because I want to be with my two favourite men" she said "JR do you remember the time I left you to go to the Southern Cross?"

"Yes" JR replied

"Well part of me didn't want to stay there; remember when you tried to coax Miss Ellie into taking John Ross on the helicopter with you" she said "Something inside me wanted to get on that helicopter with you; to tell you that I wanted you to take me home and try and sort out our marriage; but I knew that things wouldn't change"

"I don't want to lose you" JR said

"You won't" she smiled "So are you going to make love to me or not?"

JR laughed "I thought you were tired" he said

Sue Ellen kissed him and swiftly removed his towel. Beginning with his lips she began to kiss her way down his body, finally falling to her knees she took him in her mouth and gently began sucking him.

"No…Sue Ellen…..please I won't be able to stand." JR said but she ignored him and carried on with the job in hand. JR closed his eyes and gripped the dressing table for support. Finally Sue Ellen stopped feeling that he was hard inside her; she stood up and taking his hand pulled him towards the bed; laying down she pulled him on top of her and taking his manhood in her hands she guided him inside of her. Finding their rhythm they moved together towards their climax, once they were finished they relaxed into each others arms and held each other tightly.

"Good morning darlin'" Sue Ellen smiled

"It certainly is" JR replied "I just hope every morning is as good as this"

"Come on let's take a shower" she said

JR kissed her "I love you" he said

"I love you too" she replied "So very, very much"

After showering the couple went downstairs for breakfast, and then JR drove John Ross to school before dropping Sue Ellen off at work.

"I wish you didn't have to go to work" JR said as he stopped the car by her office

"And what would you like to do all day" She asked

"How about staying in bed until we have to pick John Ross up from school" JR replied

"Hmm, let sure does sound like fun" Sue Ellen smiled "But unfortunately we have to live in the real world, by the way don't forget that I'm seeing Pam for lunch"

JR groaned "Oh I forgot she was back" he said "What time do you want me to pick you up"

"After you've picked John Ross up from school" she replied "How's Ewing Oil doing"

"Not bad, we've managed to repair most of the damage and things are slowly getting back to normal" he replied

"No crooked deals JR" she laughed "I don't want my family put in danger"

"No ma'am" he replied leaning over to give her a kiss.

"See you later" she said

JR watched her walk away before he drove off; suddenly a thought came to him and he stopped by at the nearest flower shop he could find and brought a dozen yellow roses. He then drove back to Sue Ellen's office. Walking into the reception area of Grayson's research he asked if Sue Ellen was in her office and on finding that she was he knocked on her door.

"Come in" she said

The door opened and Sue Ellen smiled to see JR standing before her.

"Couldn't keep away" she laughed

"What makes you say that?" JR smiled

"Eh, it's about ten minutes since I last saw you" she replied

"Well I suddenly past a flower shop and these beautiful yellow roses were calling out to me to buy them, so I decided I need to find a beautiful woman to give them to; however as she seems to be unavailable I wondered if you would like them" JR grinned

Sue Ellen laughed "They're beautiful" she said

"Sure you wont change your mind about lunch?" He asked

"Sorry, I can't" she replied "But I promise I will make it up to you tonight"

"Mmm, I might just hold you to that" he said

Sue Ellen took the flowers and placed them on her desk; then she wrapped her arms around JR's neck and began to kiss him. She loved this new JR and she desparately hoped that this time he had really changed and she wasn't deluding herself. JR pulled her tightly towards him; enjoying her touch and thinking that this time he was going to do everything in his power to show her how much she meant to him. Finally they broke away.

"Suppose I better be going" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "If you stay here, I won't get much work done" she said

"Okay I'll pick you up at 3.30pm" he said

"Fine" she replied "Maybe we could take John Ross to a movie and get something to eat in town"

"Good idea!" JR said

"JR!" Sue Ellen said as he opened the door, JR turned around to face her.

"I love you" she said

"I love you too" he replied

After he had gone Sue Ellen sat down at her desk and tried to get started on some work. Unfortunately for her it seemed her mind was on JR. Once again she looked at the flowers JR had just brought her and smiled; things were just about perfect in her life now.

**A Dallas Restaurant**

Pam and Sue Ellen sat in the restaurant and had just ordered their meal.

"So how's married life?" Sue Ellen asked

"It's fine" Pam replied "We had a really good honeymoon"

Sue Ellen laughed "I bet with a three year old child tagging along" she said "You could have left him with me I think John Ross has missed him"

"I know but Mark and I wanted him with us, we didn't want him to feel left out" Pam replied "Anyway how are you?"

"I'm fine, things just couldn't be better" Sue Ellen smiled

"And JR" Pam asked

"JR is fine, he's being so loving and attentive at the moment" Sue Ellen said

Pam sighed, she knew JR too well "But will it last" she said

"Pam, I know what you think of JR and I'd probably agree with you; but there's a side to him that he doesn't allow anyone else to see, a few weeks back he had a meeting with Angelica at Ewing Oil but he didn't go, he came to the Amusement park with the rest of the family; he's trying to change and that's all I can ask of him" Sue Ellen said

"I'm just worried that he's going to hurt you again" Pam said

Seeing their meal arrive, they stopped their conversation for a moment and after the waiter had finished putting their meal on the table, they thanked him before carrying on with their conversation.

"Pam it's going to be okay" Sue Ellen said "For the first time ever I'm confident that I can trust JR" Sue Ellen replied

Pam smiled "Can I ask you a question?" she asked

"What?" Sue Ellen replied

"What do you see in him" Pam replied

Sue Ellen sighed "I wonder that myself sometimes but there's a magic between us that I just can't find with anyone else I love him I always have; there are times when he can be so tender and loving; he wants us to renew our vows, this time he wants to make a real commitment to me and we both want more children" she said "I can't explain why I keep going back to him, all I know is that I've never loved anyone as much as him"

"That's another thing, I never saw JR as the paternal type" Pam said

"JR loves his son, I think from the moment he was born part of him hoped that John Ross was his, I remember the day that the paternity test came through, the first time JR held John Ross; he didn't know that I was there but I saw the look of love in his eyes as he held the baby for the first time. A few weeks ago at the Amusement park, JR went on every single ride with John Ross even though at times he felt sick. He's also started to take John Ross with him on field trips to the oil sites" Sue Ellen said

"Are you going to let JR take him into Ewing Oil like Jock did?" Pam asked

"No, JR doesn't want that, JR was five years old when he started and that was really too young, I think that's part of JR's problem. However I think John Ross would quit school if he could" Sue Ellen laughed

"I just hope you're right about him" Pam said

"Trust me" Sue Ellen replied "By the way how's Cliff, its awful what happened to Jamie"

"I know, she didn't stand much of a chance" Pam said "The bomb exploded as soon as she opened the door, Cliff is still devastated but he's coping, I think I phoned him every night we were away."

"I miss Jamie too, she was a good friend" Sue Ellen said "This was Angelica's work, she also left a bomb in Ewing Oil, thinking that JR would be there"

"Was anyone hurt?" Pam asked

"No, only Mandy Winger" Sue Ellen said "She went looking for JR; however he wasn't there he was with me"

"Sue Ellen can you honestly be sure it's over between those two" Pam asked

"Yes I can, we both went to see her in hospital and he told her that he didn't want to see her again" Sue Ellen replied

Pam laughed "Okay I'll give JR the benefit of the doubt but if he hurts you again, I'll make his life hell" she said

Sue Ellen smiled "I've missed you, I hope you still come to Southfork, I still want to see my nephew" she said

"Of course" Pam said "Miss Ellie told me that we're welcome there anytime"

"I'm organizing another fund raiser for Grayson's, in fact JR is looking into finding sponsorship for us with his connections in the oil business" Sue Ellen said "So there be another ball coming up"

"If you need any help, let me know however we all know you are the queen of organizing parties" Pam laughed

"Mmm, which reminds me I have to get back to work, we must meet up again soon!" Sue Ellen said

**A Dallas Jail**

Angelica continued to fume about being locked inside her cell, however she saw dopey the guard come back. She called him that as she knew he wasn't that bright. He unlocked the door and placed a tray of food on a table for her. Angelica looked at the gun he was carrying in his side pocket and realized that it wouldn't take much to relieve him of that piece of equipment, so violently she threw her tray at him. He turned just as the tray hit him and slipped, falling to the ground. Quickly Angelica lifted the gun from him and banged him over the head with it, seeing that he was unconscious she also took his keys from him and walking out locked the door behind her. Now all she had to do was find a way out. Ten minutes later she had found a way to escape and stood outside relishing her freedom, however she had work to do now and her first priority was making JR Ewing and bringing him to his knees. However she needed to get as far away from this jail as she could and find somewhere to hide.

**Southfork**

JR and Sue Ellen got out of their car. They had spent the evening as a family taking John Ross to see a movie then having dinner together.

"I really enjoyed tonight" JR said

"So did I" Sue Ellen smiled "And I think we've worn our son out" she said as she looked at her sleeping son.

"I'll carry him in" JR replied, reaching into the back seat and gently lifting John Ross out of the car. They walked into the house and were greeted by a worried Clayton and Miss Ellie.

"Thank God you're home" Miss Ellie said

"Why what's wrong" JR asked

"A news report had just said that Angelica Nero has escaped" Clayton said

"That can't be" JR replied

"I'm afraid so JR" Miss Ellie said

JR and Sue Ellen looked at each other, what did this mean?

**Sue Ellen & JR's Bedroom**

After putting John Ross to bed, JR and Sue Ellen went to their own room and got ready for bed. While Sue Ellen took a shower JR went and sat out on the balcony and looked out across the vast plains of Southfork. For once in his life he was scared of his enemy; Angelica Nero on the loose was a frightening prospect after all 'hell has no fury like a woman scorned' he thought; and he knew she was dangerous, he saw that side of her in Martinique and also in Dallas when she forced him into the car at gunpoint. What was she planning? He desperately needed to be one step ahead of her. He was so deep in thought that he didn't hear Sue Ellen come out of the shower and onto the balcony, she called his name but he didn't answer her; so she went and knelt down in front of him and put her hands on his knees. JR sighed at the sensation of her touch.

"Talk to me" she said

JR looked at her seeing the look of concern in her eyes he smiled and gently touched her face.

"I love you" he said "So very much"

"I know; but quit stalling tell me what you're thinking" she replied

JR lifted her into his lap and she cuddled into him.

"I was just thinking about how peaceful it is out here; everything is so quiet and perfect" JR said

"You're worried about Angelica?" Sue Ellen said

"Sue Ellen, she's dangerous; she scares the hell out of me. The only other time I think that I've ever been this scared was after John Ross was born and I thought I would lose you. I know what she's capable of and I have no idea what she's thinking or what she's planning to do" he replied "I need to be one step ahead of her; I need to protect this family."

"And Ewing Oil" Sue Ellen said

"To be honest, Ewing Oil doesn't concern me at the moment; for the first time in my life I feel like I have a family who love me and they are what's important" he said

Sue Ellen smiled "Your family has always loved you JR; there were just time when we didn't like you" she said "We will get through this together"

"I know what daddy will be thinking now" JR said "His words to me would probably be 'you jackass' JR laughed "He'd be right, I've failed him again"

"JR, will you stop beating yourself up about what your father thought" Sue Ellen said

"I was never good enough in his eyes" JR said "I let him down so many times"

"It doesn't matter anymore" Sue Ellen said holding him tighter. She looked at him and saw the tears in his eyes.

"Why did he love Bobby more than me, what did Bobby have that I didn't?" JR asked "I tried so hard to please him but nothing really worked, Bobby was always the blue-eyed boy"

Sue Ellen sighed "I don't know sweetheart, maybe it was just that Bobby was so much younger than you, that when he came along he wasn't working at Ewing Oil quite so much so had more time to spend with him. However it didn't mean that he loved you any less" she said

JR laughed "Come on Sue Ellen, Bobby got everything he wanted, daddy even forgave him for marrying Pam" JR said

"JR, this is in the past, it's over; none of it matters anymore; I love you, your son loves you; that is all that matters" Sue Ellen said "We can learn from the mistakes of the past and make sure that your son never feels neglected by either of us"

"Do you remember the day I found out he was mine?" JR asked

Sue Ellen smiled "I couldn't believe it when I read the newspaper; that Cliff could be so stupid to tell his father something like that; and if I'm honest…" she said

"What?" JR asked

"JR….I always knew who John Ross' father was from the moment I saw him; he has your eyes, the same steel blue eyes that makes me melt every time I saw them, even though in the early days I couldn't bear to touch him. However I knew that you didn't believe he was yours and while you thought that part of me felt safe. Our relationship was so hostile and with Dusty in my life, I felt that if you didn't know the truth, then when things got too much I could walk out and take the baby with me. Dusty would have brought him up as his own. After the newspaper printed the story I knew things would change, I put on a front with you but I knew that once the blood tests revealed the truth that I would be trapped forever" she replied "I tried to fool myself into thinking that Cliff was the father but deep down I knew it wasn't true"

"I have to admit I was scared; I was absolutely certain that Cliff was the father; I mean we weren't exactly intimate on a regular basis" JR said "I couldn't even remember making love to you within the timescale that you conceived"

Sue Ellen laughed "I'm glad it was so memorable for you!" she said "But like I told you at the time, you came back from Austin one weekend after working out there and we went out for dinner; It escapes me as to why you came home to me instead of one of your girlfriends but I can tell you that it was definitely me you spent that weekend with. Anyway we had both had too much to drink and one thing led to another. I couldn't have been as drunk as you were as I remembered it clearly and then in the morning we slept in, then at lunchtime we took a picnic to the lake and ended up making love down there. I was so happy, you gave me all the love I had been craving for that weekend however the following weekend you were busy" she said

"I can't believe it" JR laughed "After all the years of trying; you finally get pregnant during a drunken fumble"

"I don't know, I'd sooner think it happened down by the lake" Sue Ellen said

"I remember thinking that if Cliff was the father; that once again momma and daddy would see me as a failure and I knew that it would be the end of us and believe it or not I didn't want that. I know I threatened you with the fastest divorce in Texas if Cliff was the father but I really didn't want that" JR said "I remember the feeling of apprehension when the results came through, my hands were shaking and my heart was thumping and then when the results came through I was so happy, I felt I was walking on air and my only thoughts was to see my son"

"I know, I crept upstairs after you and watched as you held John Ross" Sue Ellen said "I think it was at that moment I knew it was right that the truth had come out. John Ross needed his father and even though I hated what it would mean, you needed to know he was yours"

"After daddy died; I was very depressed and the only thing that pulled me through was John Ross, when he was at Southfork at the weekends I used to lay on his bed with him at night and watch him sleep; then I suddenly realized I wanted my family back and not just to get control of Ewing Oil like everyone thought" JR said "I realized that I needed you in my life; that I couldn't survive without you which is why I set about trying to destroy Cliff, I couldn't bear the thought of him with you. Sue Ellen I want you to know and believe this; that when I remarried you, I meant those vows I made, I was so in love with you and if I could turn back time and go back to that day I would only this time I would be completely faithful to you"

"We can't turn back time but we can go forward, like I said we have to learn by our mistakes and not repeat them" Sue Ellen said

"I promise" JR said "This time I'm never going to do anything to risk losing my family"

"You wont" Sue Ellen said "You're stuck with me"

JR pulled her closer to him and kissed her "You're amazing" he said "In one year you've changed so much"

"We both have; now it's time for you to get ready for bed" Sue Ellen said

While JR went to have a shower Sue Ellen crept into her son's bedroom. He was still awake listening to his personal tape recorder.

"Hey you, I thought I told you it was time to go to sleep" Sue Ellen whispered

"Momma, I can't sleep" John Ross replied "Why was Clayton so angry with daddy"

Sue Ellen kissed him "Sweetheart don't worry about that" Sue Ellen said "Everything will be okay"

"Can I come and sleep in your room" John Ross asked

"Hmm" Sue Ellen thought "Only if you promise to go to sleep" she replied "And you're not allowed to snore, I can't put up with both you and your daddy snoring all night" she laughed

"I'll be good" he replied

Sue Ellen lifted him out of the bed and carried him to her room.

"Right just stay there" She said "I'm just going to see your daddy"

Sue Ellen walked into the bathroom with JR's pajamas. "JR, we have a visitor, so I suggest you don't come out without your pajamas on" she laughed

On hearing her voice JR stepped out of the shower and took Sue Ellen in his arms.

"JR!" Sue Ellen whispered "Our son is next door" she laughed

"So" JR said "I promise I'll be quiet" as his hands rolled up Sue Ellen's nightgown.

"You're soaking wet" Sue Ellen said

JR laughed "Well let's feel if you are" he said

"God you are so incorrigible" Sue Ellen said

JR lifted her up and pushed her against the wall of the bathroom; quickly he inserted two fingers inside of her. "Just as I thought, soaking wet just as I like you" he said

Sue Ellen tried to pull away, as much as she wanted him she knew they couldn't do this with John Ross in the next room.

"Stop it" she said, finally breaking free.

JR sighed "Ughhhh, I'll get you back for this" he said

Sue Ellen smirked "That's what I was hoping you say" she winked. "Later I promise"

Sue Ellen walked back into the bedroom.

"Momma, what's daddy doing in there" John Ross said

"Oh he's just being silly" Sue Ellen replied as she climbed into bed.

Putting John Ross between her and JR she held him tightly. "I love you baby" she said

"I love you too momma" John Ross replied

JR came out of the bathroom and looked at John Ross and Sue Ellen cuddled up. He smiled and climbed into bed; putting his arm around both of them, he pulled them closer to him. He desperately needed to keep them safe!

**A Warehouse somewhere in Dallas**

Angelica sat on the floor of the deserted warehouse, considering her next move. Her contacts had only been able to secure this warehouse for her, however she now had a car and early tomorrow she would receive documents giving her a new identity, however until then she was stuck where she was. Looking around her she cursed, the whole place was damp and smelly and she swore she had just seen two rats pass by. Now, what she had to do was come up with a plan to destroy JR. And the one thing that was most precious to JR was Ewing Oil. By taking Ewing Oil off him, he would be broken. Now she had to find a way to do that.

**Southfork the following morning**

JR was woken by the sunlight shining through the windows. He looked down at John Ross and Sue Ellen who were still sleeping. He gave a sigh of contentment. John Ross opened his eyes and saw his daddy staring at him.

"Hello daddy" John Ross said

JR pulled him closer to him and kissed his head.

"Hi buddy, did you sleep well" JR asked

"Yes" John Ross replied "What time is it"

"It's 8am and as its Saturday, we don't have to get up" JR said

"Can we go to the park" John Ross asked

"Yes and if you like we can phone your aunt Pam and see if Christopher wants to join us" JR said

"Great daddy, I love you" John Ross replied

"I love you too" JR said

John Ross climbed out of bed "I'm going to get ready" he called as he left the room.

JR turned his attentions to a sleeping Sue Ellen. Gently he began to tickle her feet, knowing how ticklish she was. Sue Ellen tried desperately to ignore him, knowing that she was driving him crazy; she knew they were alone as she had heard John Ross leave, she also knew what was on JR's mind. Finally she surrendered and opened her eyes.

"Good morning" JR said, kissing her

"Good morning to you" Sue Ellen said "And thanks for waking me up!"

"Well you can't sleep all day, it's a beautiful morning and it's such a shame to waste it" JR said

"Right, I better get up" she said, making an attempt to get out of bed

JR pulled her back "Oh no you don't" he laughed "We have some unfinished business"

Sue Ellen laughed "And what could that be Ewing?" she asked

JR kissed her passionately on the mouth, then began rolling her nightdress up. Sue Ellen shook her head and giggled.

"What happens if our son walks back in?" She asked

"He wont now shut up!" JR replied

Sue Ellen helped JR remove her nightdress from her, then she set to work on removing his pajamas, finally when both of them were naked, she climbed on top of him. Reaching down she took his manhood in her hands.

"Put it inside you" JR whispered

"I didn't quite hear that" Sue Ellen laughed

"Sue Ellen, stop teasing" JR said "Or else"

"Or else what?" Sue Ellen said

JR groaned "Just do it please!" he begged

"I love it when you beg" she laughed

Suddenly she released her grip on JR and began to kiss her way down his body; JR lay back loving the sensation her tongue made on him. Finally she found what she wanted and playing special attention to it, she licked it liked an ice lolly. JR began to groan, Sue Ellen laughed and worked her way back up his body. Suddenly JR could not take anymore and flipped Sue Ellen onto her bed. Quickly he entered her and screaming her name spilt his seed inside of her.

"I love you" she said

"Mmmm, I wish we could stay like this all day" JR said

"You don't mind John Ross staying with us last night?" Sue Ellen asked

"No" JR said "It was nice being able to cuddle up to the both of you; I promised him we'd take him to the park today and also we'd ask Pam if Christopher could join us"

"Great!" Sue Ellen said "Have I told you that I love the new you"

"Once or twice!" JR laughed "Come on let's get dressed"

Sue Ellen made a move to get out of bed but something stopped her. For a second she felt lightheaded and queasy. She fell back onto her pillow.

"Are you okay darlin'?" JR asked

"Yes" Sue Ellen replied "I just felt dizzy for a moment"

JR looked at her with concern

"Don't worry" she said "I'm fine"

Two hours later JR and Sue Ellen were sat in a Dallas park watching Christopher and John Ross play. JR moved closer to Sue Ellen and wrapped his arms around her, Sue Ellen laid her head against his chest.

"This is heaven" JR said "All we need now are a couple more children"

"That's a side you never display" Sue Ellen said "I don't think anyone who knows you would realize how much you want a family"

"The family has always been important to me, I guess I just hid it well, but since Bobby has been gone, I realize that what I want more than ever is you and our children" he replied

"I want more children too" Sue Ellen said "And I promise you wont have to wait long"

Meanwhile Angelica stood watching them through binoculars. She made sure she was at a safe distant with no chance of discovery. Seeing the interaction between JR and Sue Ellen gave her an idea, she had a way of bringing JR down and getting Ewing Oil.

"Okay JR, let's see who you love most; your family or Ewing Oil"

**A week later**

Sue Ellen waited in the doctor's reception. JR was picking John Ross up so she didn't have to worry about hi. Thinking about JR reminded her of how annoyed he was with he this morning when she had refused to tell him where she was going and insisting that she drove to work in her car. It wasn't that she didn't want to tell him but knowing how much he wanted another child she didn't want to get his hopes up. Although the last time she had felt as dizzy and nauseated was when she was pregnant with John Ross. The doctor called her into his office.

"Well I'm delighted to say, Sue Ellen that you suspicions were right and you are indeed pregnant" he said

"Is everything okay?" She asked

"Well as long as you look after yourself I'm sure everything will be fine" he said

"How far gone am I" she asked

"About 7 weeks" he said "I've booked another appointment for you at the hospital in a months time"

"Thankyou" she said

On leaving the doctor's surgery; Sue Ellen thought back to seven weeks ago; it was the time of the fundraiser. She remembered that night so clearly, JR had been the perfect gentleman at the fundraiser even refusing to talk business and then she thought of the time they had had after leaving. Their lovemaking that night had been wonderful; they both promised each other total commitment and a fresh start. Now they were going to have one; a new baby to love and cherish as much as John Ross. For once things were going right. Sue Ellen was so deep in thought that she failed to hear the person come up behind her. As she got to her car, a hand went over her mouth and she felt the feel of steel pressing into her back

"Don't say a word" the voice told her "Or I'll kill you"

Sue Ellen tried to resist but the person held her tighter, she knew it was a woman's voice and reality suddenly hit her. Angelica Nero.

"Step away from the car and do as I say" the voice said

Sue Ellen feared for her unborn baby; she did exactly what she was told. Five minutes later she found herself bungled into the back seat of Angelica's car. Suddenly she felt fear like she had never felt before. Was this is? Would Angelica get revenge on JR by killing her?

Once Angelica had reached her destination she forced Sue Ellen out of the car at gunpoint. Sue Ellen had no option but to do what she was told as it wasn't just her life which was in danger but the life of her unborn child. Angelica led her into the dark warehouse and pushed her to the floor. She then tied up Sue Ellen's hands and legs so that she couldn't move.

"What are you going to do to me?" Sue Ellen asked

Angelica looked at her "Just keep your mouth shut and you'll be safe" she replied "I have to go out for a while but don't try anything"

Sue Ellen looked at her "Please just let me go" she said "I'm……"

"You're what" Angelica asked

Sue Ellen thought for a moment, if she told Angelica she was pregnant would that make things worse for her or not. Deciding it was best not to say anything she answered

"I'm scared"

Angelica laughed "And rightly so" she said "Especially if your husband doesn't give me what I want"

"And what is it you want?" Sue Ellen asked

"For a start Ewing Oil" Angelica replied

"JR will never give up Ewing Oil" Sue Ellen replied

"We'll see" Angelica said "But now it's time for you to shut up"

"I'm thirsty" Sue Ellen said

"Too bad" Angelica said as she exited the warehouse, turning of the light as she went and plunging Sue Ellen into darkness.

Sue Ellen sat very still in the darkness; her throat was bone dry, she also felt sick. Thinking about the new life inside of her she began to cry. She wanted everything to be perfect this time. She had a chance of a new life with JR; he was showing her the love and affection that she had craved for all her married life. She suddenly realized that JR didn't know where she was going; she had told him that she had an appointment but wouldn't say who with. Why had she kept the doctor's appointment a secret from him, maybe because she didn't want him to get his hopes up, knowing how much he wanted another child, but now she saw how stupid that was especially with Angelica on the loose. The warehouse was filthy and there was a peculiar smell; suddenly something furry touched her legs. Rats, 'I'm in a dirty old warehouse, this place is bound to have rats in' Sue Ellen thought 'How long am I going to be in here, what if JR decides he wants Ewing Oil more than me'. Sue Ellen closed her eyes and rested her head against the cold stone wall. She was hungry and thirsty, she hadn't eaten anything since lunch time and that was about five hours ago. She tried to steady her breathing and concentrate on the baby and slowly she closed her eyes

**Southfork**

JR had arrived home with John Ross at four o'clock and sat waiting by the pool for Sue Ellen to come home. He noticed she had seemed tired lately so after dinner he planned to spend the evening pampering her once they had got John Ross to bed. JR looked towards the pool where John Ross was swimming, the boy seemed happier of late; JR grinned in fact he himself had never been happier; he realized now what a mistake he had made chasing other women when he had the best at home. He had put her through so much and yet she was always willing to forgive him and be there for him when he needed her. He now knew that he only ever really loved her and he would prove that to her for the rest of his life.

**The Warehouse**

Sue Ellen opened her eyes, suddenly feeling cramp in her legs. By now she was starving hungry and had an uncomfortable feeling in her abdomen; she prayed that nothing was wrong with the baby. She had no idea how long she had been asleep but if felt like a while. Her hands were tied behind her back so she couldn't see her watch. She felt a cold chill go through her body and realized she wasn't alone. She looked up to see a man sitting in a chair on the opposite side of the room.

"Who are you?" she asked

The man walked closer and crouched down in front of her.

"Let's just say I'm your babysitter" he laughed, as he placed one hand on her face.

"Don't touch me!" she said

The man placed his hand on her blouse and undoing the buttons placed one hand inside her blouse; Sue Ellen tried to struggle but it was no use as her hands and feet were tied.

"Please" she said "Leave me alone"

"Hmm; don't know if I can do that, a good-looking woman like you seems too much to resist" he laughed

Sue Ellen screamed and he smacked her hard across the face.

"Now anymore of that and I will do something you'll regret" he said "Just shut up!"

"I'm thirsty" she said "I need water"

"Too bad" he replied "The only water here is the water leaking from the roof when it rains"

"I want to go home" Sue Ellen said

"The man went back to his seat and sat watching her "The only person who can decide whether you go home or not is your husband; if he doesn't give Angelica Ewing Oil then you wont ever see your family again" he said as he picked up the gun from under his chair and aimed it at her.

Sue Ellen's whole body shook; so it was JR's decision whether she lived or died. If he needed Ewing Oil more than her then the life of her and their unborn child would be finished. These past two months JR had told her that he wanted to put his family first before anything but would he be prepared to give up Ewing Oil; the company his beloved father had started for her. Did he love her that much? Sue Ellen felt tears form in her eyes; she needed to believe that JR did love her but something inside her told her otherwise.

**Southfork (two hours later)**

JR looked at the clock in the living room; it was now eight o'clock and still no sign of Sue Ellen. The family had decided to eat about half an hour ago however JR was not hungry, something was bothering him. Where was Sue Ellen? She had been fine when she left this morning in fact last night had been really good, so why hasn't she come home yet? Who was her appointment with and why was she being so damn secretive? JR was worried that something had happened to her so decided that after putting John Ross to bed he would go out looking for her. His thoughts were disrupted by Clayton.

"JR have you any idea where Sue Ellen is?" Clayton asked

"No" JR replied "All I know is that she had an appointment" JR replied

"Who with?" Clayton asked

"Hell, I don't know she wouldn't tell me" JR said "She just said it was nothing to worry about"

"Have you two had a falling out?" Miss Ellie asked

JR sighed "No, we're fine" he said "In fact things couldn't be better"

Half an hour later JR went upstairs with John Ross and read him a story before bedtime.

"Daddy is mommy coming back" his son asked

JR looked at his son and smiled "Sure she is; she just had to work late" he said "You remember that sometimes she's late home"

"That's why she made me those tapes" John Ross replied

"Exactly, so that you would know that she's here even when she's not" JR said

"Can I listen to a tape now?" John Ross asked

JR smiled and kissed his son "It's getting late buddy, but just this once I'll let you" he said "Good night son"

"Night daddy" John Ross replied

JR shut off the light and looked back at his son, lying in bed with his headphones on. Part of him wished that he could do the same. The only thing he wanted was to hear the sound of her voice and know that she was okay. Where was she? JR just reached the bottom of the stairs when the telephone rang. JR quickly picked it up.

"Sue Ellen?" He said

"Wrong JR try again" Angelica replied

JR's heart sank; he should have know Angelica would try anything to get to him. He should have kept Sue Ellen better protected.

"What do you want?" he asked

"That is for me to know and you to find out" she laughed

"Where's Sue Ellen" JR said

"Oh, I've got one of my men keeping an eye on her" Angelica replied

"If you hurt her, I will kill you" JR said

"Ewing, you are in no position to make threats" Angelica said

"What do you want?" JR asked again.

"You'll find out" Angelica said "But not tonight, I just wanted to let you know that your wife was being taken care off"

"Damn you, tell me now" JR said

"Don't raise your voice to me, my man has got a gun and if I give him the word he will use it on her; that's after he's had his fun with her" Angelicas said "I have to go now but I will contact you first thing in the morning"

JR started to speak again but the line went dead. He walked into the living room where Clayton and Miss Ellie were waiting for him to tell them what the phone call was about.

"That was Angelica Nero" JR said "She has Sue Ellen"

"No!" Clayton "Damn you JR; do you realize how much danger you have put your wife in"

"Do you think I meant for this to happen" JR replied

"What does she want?" Miss Ellie asked

"I don't know" JR said "She wouldn't tell me"

Clayton shook his head in disgust "I'm going upstairs, I don't think I could stand being around you anymore today" he said

Miss Ellie followed him upstairs, leaving JR alone in the living room. JR sat in the chair and put his head in his hands. He felt tears spring to his eyes as he thought about the danger Sue Ellen was in and the fact that it was all his fault. He sat there in silence and let the tears fall; he was really afraid and the only time he could ever remember being so afraid was after the birth of John Ross when he had been in danger of losing Sue Ellen. He knew that he would do anything to get her back; he would pay any amount of money to have her safe.

A couple of hours later Miss Ellie walked downstairs to find JR still sitting in the chair.

"JR it's late" she said

"I can't go to bed" JR said "Momma I love her so much"

"JR, she'll be alright" Miss Ellie said hoping her words would ring true.

"We were so happy" JR said "We were talking about having another child…..I don't know what I'll do if I lose her"

Miss Ellie looked at her son; she saw his tear stained face "JR you need to get some rest"

JR looked at her and knew she was right. He had to be strong for both Sue Ellen and John Ross. Reluctantly he followed her upstairs.

**Southfork the next morning**

JR was woken early by the ring of the telephone next to his bed. Quickly he reached for it.

"Good morning JR and how are you this morning?" he heard the voice of Angelica say. "Found anyone knew to sleep with"

"Stop playing games Angelica, what do you want" he replied

"First there must be no police involved, if I get a hint of them Sue Ellen will die, I promise you that" she said

"Okay" JR sighed "What else"

"Do you really love her?" Angelica asked

"Yes" JR said "More than anything"

"Are you absolutely sure about that" Angelica said

"What is this twenty questions" JR replied angrily.

"Careful JR, remember I hold the power now" Angelica said

"Just tell me what you want" he said

"It's really quite simple, Ewing Oil" Angelica said

"What?" JR replied

"I will give Sue Ellen back if you give me Ewing Oil" Angelica said "Let's really see who you love most; you have twelve hours to decide; but I will keep my promise if you choose Ewing Oil your wife dies"

JR remained silent

"Also JR, remember no police" Angelica said "The choice is yours!"

With that last remark the line went dead.

**The Warehouse**

Sue Ellen was awoken by a door slam nearby; she opened her eyes and for a moment couldn't remember where she was. She had a restless night and still felt exhausted; she also felt sick. She looked up and saw Angelica standing over her.

"Here" she said putting down a plate of bread and a glass next to Sue Ellen.

"What is this" Sue Ellen said

"Bread and water; not exactly what you're used to but it will have to do" Angelica replied

Sue Ellen looked at it as if it was poison.

"Don't worry, its eatable" Angelica laughed "I'm not going to kill you yet, you're too useful at the moment"

"What do you mean?" Sue Ellen asked

"Well, I had a nice little chat with your husband this morning; I told him that he had a choice; that he could save you by giving me Ewing Oil or he can keep Ewing Oil and I'll kill you" Angelica replied

"What did he say?" Sue Ellen said

"Not a lot; he's still thinking about it" Angelica smiled "In fact he has under twelve hours to decide"

Sue Ellen remained silent; she didn't even want to think about what JR would do. Part of her wanted to believe that he wanted her more than Ewing Oil but something inside her told her that he would never give up Ewing Oil even if her life depended on it. She felt tears in her eyes and her thoughts went to the unborn child developing inside her. The child she wanted more than anything; she wanted to share this pregnancy with JR, to have him beside her, supporting her unlike the last time she had been pregnant. She realized that her life was now in his hands and she had to trust and believe in him.

"Can you untie my hands?" Sue Ellen said "I can't eat with my hands behind my back"

"Alright, but you try anything and I'll send one of the guys in to deal with you" Angelica replied

Angelica untied her and started to walk out the door. As she opened the door she stopped and turned around.

"Don't try anything" she said

Sue Ellen sat alone in her cell; the smell of damp was terrible; she also felt terribly cold. She looked at the food on the floor and felt sick; not wanting to touch it. However she knew that she had to eat if not for her sake then for her baby's. Slowly she picked up the plate and started to eat the bread. It felt good; it had been ages since her last meal; she then took the glass and began to drink. After she had finished she leaned back against the wall and closed her eyes. Her hands went instinctively to her tummy; wanting so much to protect the new life inside her; the tears once again formed in her eyes.

**Southfork**

JR had stayed in his room until he knew he was alone in the house. Pam had picked John Ross up to take him to school and Miss Ellie and Clayton had gone into town. JR couldn't face seeing anyone this morning especially not his son. How could he tell John Ross that his mother's life was in danger and it was his entire fault? Twelve hours was all the time he had to come up with a plan to save Sue Ellen; after going downstairs JR decided to take a walk around the pastures as he had a lot to think about. Finally he reached the treehouse and Bobby's grave. He remembered the last time he had come up here with Sue Ellen; they had spent ages talking and holding each other. He sat down at the tree and looked at the treehouse on top of it. He smiled as he thought about the times after they had first met; he would leave little notes and flowers for her at the stables telling her to find him; she would then take the horse he had brought for her and would ride up to the treehouse to find him. His yellow rose of Texas; his one true love the only woman who had ever really loved him for himself and not because he was the mighty JR Ewing. He thought about how they would spend ages sitting in the treehouse talking; he could talk to her about anything; she understood how he felt about his daddy and not being his favourite son; she just used to sit listening to him; holding his hand trying to calm his fears, telling him that she loved him. Throughout their marriage when things were good between them; Sue Ellen had been his rock; always standing firm on his side no matter whether he was right or wrong. The times she wasn't there for him had been his own fault. He laughed when he thought about the times in the treehouse; how prim and proper she had been when they first met. So many times he had wanted to make love to her but she had always stopped before they went too far; she wanted to wait until they were married. It had driven him mad; no woman had ever denied him what he wanted but she had. He smiled when he remembered that Jock had built the treehouse for Bobby; but he was sure he had better memories of the place than he had. Getting up JR walked towards the lake; another favourite place for him and Sue Ellen. He remembered how she used to lay with her head in his lap while he read to her Shakespeare or poetry. She told him how much she loved him reading to her; how much his voice soothed her. She always managed to make him feel special; she still did. These past six months he had only wanted her; she filled his dreams even when he was laying in bed next to Mandy after making love to her. Thinking how so many nights he had made love to Mandy wishing it had been Sue Ellen. He thought back to the night of the fundraiser; that had to be one of the best nights of his life. Sue Ellen had looked stunning and so confident the way she had organized the event and how she had people eating out of her hand. When Sue Ellen asked for money for research people gave; noone could resist her charm. Mark Graison knew what he was doing when he asked her to be his Public Relations Officer and Chief Fundraiser; she was amazing and she was his; she would do anything for him. They had spent most of that evening in each others arms dancing, holding each other; breathing in each others scent then finally they had made it home and into bed. Their love making that night had been wonderful; both had given themselves to each other completely; JR had finally managed to open up his heart and let her have him completely; something had always held him back, he never allowed himself to use the word 'love' always feeling that he was unworthy of love; but Sue Ellen had taught him otherwise; that night he allowed himself to open up to her; to tell her that he loved her. Looking into her eyes that night, he had told her that he loved her and was willing to make a total commitment to her, forsaking all others he would be faithful to her forever. He remembered the look in her eyes when he had made that promise; it was a look of total love JR looked at his watch, it was now two hours since Angelica's phone call; he had ten hours before she would call. He looked up to the sky and for the first time in his life he knew what was important.

"God, I love her, more than life itself" he said to the lake before him "I can't lose her"

Reluctantly leaving the place that held happy memories for him, he returned back to the house. His priority was to get Sue Ellen back but he also wanted to make sure that Angelica didn't have Ewing Oil; he needed to speak to Harry McSween. He phoned Harry and told him to meet him at Southfork within the hour. JR made a second phonecall to Harve Smithfield the family lawyer. It was time for action, every second was precious; in ten hours time he wanted Sue Ellen back where she belonged, in his arms.

An hour later Harry and Harve sat in the den with JR.

"JR we have to get the police involved" Harve said "Angelica is dangerous, there's a warrant out for her arrest"

"I can't risk Sue Ellen's life like that" JR said "If Angelica even smells a police officer I know she'll kill Sue Ellen"

"It's a threat JR" Harve said

"Listen, all I need for you to do is to arrange a 'legal' document which authorizes the handover of Ewing Oil to Angelica" JR said

"Are you serious?" Harve said "Your father's will states that only a Ewing can own Ewing Oil

"Yes and only a Ewing can give it away" JR said

"JR your father worked hard to build up that company" the lawyer stated

"I'm not prepared to risk Sue Ellen to save Ewing Oil" JR said "I want her back safe and sound"

"Okay I'll get the papers ready and be back here within two hours" Harve said

"Thankyou" JR replied

After the man had left JR went to the bar and poured him and Harry a drink.

"So what's the plan JR?" Harry said

JR sighed "I can't get the police involved but that doesn't mean that you and some of your good old boys cant be involved" he said "However whatever we decide to do has to be done after Sue Ellen is back with me, her safety is the most important thing here"

"Okay so arrange a meeting with her" Harry said "Once you've spoken to her, let me know where the meeting is and I'll turn up with a few of my men"

"But you stay out of sight until the deal is done" JR said "There are no second chances with Angelica, I know her too well"

"Once you and Sue Ellen are well out of the way; we will go in and deal with her and her men" Harry said

"Anyway you can" JR said "And I mean that, do what ever you have to do to get rid of her, I don't care what it takes"

"Okay" Harry said "I need to go and make a few calls, I'll phone you later"

JR heard a car drive up the driveway.

"That will be momma and Clayton; I think we need to close this meeting now" JR said

"Don't worry, I've never let you down before have I" Harry said

JR shook his head and walked him outside. JR watched Harry drive away and walked over to Miss Ellie and Clayton.

"Any news on Sue Ellen?" Clayton asked

"Angelica telephoned early this morning" JR said "She's going to call me in a few hours time"

"What does she want?" Miss Ellie asked

"Ewing Oil" JR said "Or she'll kill Sue Ellen"

"JR what have you done" Clayton said

"Clayton its okay, Harve is going to get the papers ready" JR said

"You mean you're gong to give her what she wants" Miss Ellie said

"I have no choice" JR said "In order to get Sue Ellen back; I need Angelica to believe that I'm giving up Ewing Oil"

"JR I'm warning you..if anything happens to Sue Ellen…" Clayton said

"Clayton, I want her back, I love her so much that I'm not going to let anything happen to her" JR said

"John Ross is staying with Pam tonight" Miss Ellie said "Pam will return him tomorrow morning"

"And I promise you, his mother will be back by then" JR said

"I hope so JR" Clayton replied

Eight hours later, the telephone rang. Miss Ellie and Clayton looked at each other as JR stood up to answer it.

"Angelica" JR said

"Well JR what is it to be" Angelica said

"I want to speak to Sue Ellen" JR said

"I'm afraid she's a bit busy at the moment entertaining one of my men" Angelica laughed

JR took a deep breath "If you hurt her; there's not a hiding place on earth that will keep you safe from me"

"Relax" Angelica said "I want to know your decision"

"Okay you can have Ewing Oil, but I want a guarantee that I will get Sue Ellen back at the same time" JR said

"Okay" Angelica said "But no funny business"

"Where and when" JR said

Angelica thought for a moment "I'll meet you at Ewing Oil in two hours time, but I want you to make sure that there is noone else in that building, no security guards, no police, just you and me" she said

"And Sue Ellen" JR said "If she's not with you, there's no deal"

"Two hours JR and just remember my threats are serious, if I have to kill your wife I will" Angelica replied.

After getting off the phone JR phoned Harve and arranged for him to drop off the paperwork to him, then he telephoned Harry and told him the plans. JR then sat down, two hours seemed like forever. He prayed nothing would go wrong, he wanted Angelica out of their lives forever. However the most important thing to him was getting Sue Ellen back.

**The warehouse**

Sue Ellen found herself drifting in and out of consciousness; trying desperately to keep alert but she felt overpowered by a sense of weariness that she was unable to fight. Her hands once again went to her stomach where her unborn child lay; blissfully unaware of what was going on in the outside world. Sue Ellen's thoughts wandered to John Ross; even though it had only been a day she missed him so much and longed to hold him in her arms. She thought of the time that she was pregnant with him; the pain she felt at being rejected by both JR and Cliff; she drank herself to oblivion just so that she didn't have to think about her feelings. Now she realized how much damage she could have done to her child. She put both of their lives in danger, touching her stomach she now considered that once again her unborn child's life was in danger, she was in danger and the only person who could help them was JR. Sue Ellen closed her eyes and visualized a picture of JR; the man she had loved all her life; the man who had finally made her dreams come true and promised her total commitment; however if it was a choice between her and Ewing Oil which would he choose? The only person who could answer that would be him and she knew that in a few hours his choice would be known. She didn't think JR really understood how much she truly loved him or realized that she would do anything for him; these last few months she had seen a different side of him; he worked so hard to convince her that he had changed that he wanted her and only her; she thought back to the night in the kitchen when he told her that Mandy was determined to stay in Dallas but he informed Mandy that he didn't care what she did; she remembered him telling her that night that he would never take her for granted again and then just before he left; he kissed her, such a gentle loving kiss; something inside her had softened and she knew that she didn't want to fight her feelings for him any longer; she loved him and he wanted to love her. If she got out of here alive, she vowed she would make a better life for her, JR and their children; especially John Ross. She felt so guilty when she thought of the hell they had put that child through with their volatile marriage. Things were going to be very different. Her thoughts were interrupted by the door opening; she saw a crack of light invade the darkness. She heard the sound of footsteps walking towards her. She looked up and saw her jailer standing before her; Angelica looked at her and smiled.

"Get up, it's time to leave" she said

"Where are we going?" Sue Ellen said

"Seems your husband has made a choice" Angelica said

"What…….what did he say?" Sue Ellen asked

"You'll find out, now move!" she replied

Sue Ellen tried to get up but her legs gave way; causing her to fall back down again. She felt dizzy and sick. Angelica pulled her to her feet. She called the two men who were working with her to get the car while she pulled Sue Ellen outside. Having got her in the car she told one of the men to drive.

"Where to?" the man inquired

"Ewing Oil" Angelica replied

"So what was his choice" Sue Ellen heard the other man say

"That's what we're going to find out!" Angelica said

"Well before you kill her, can I entertained her" the man who was driving said "It's been a long time since I had me some fun"

"Just drive!" Angelica replied

Sue Ellen sat quietly in the back of the car; she felt cold. Silently praying that JR really did mean it when he said he loved her.

**Ewing Oil**

JR was half an hour early arriving at Ewing Oil. The place was deserted; not even a security man was on guard. JR had done everything Angelica had asked; he had to play along just until he got Sue Ellen back. He looked around the silent, dark building; it gave him an odd feeling. He remembered another night a few years back when he had been working late in the office; that night he had been shot three times by an unknown assailant, the same thing had happened to Bobby a few years later. What was it about this building? He went upstairs into his office, suddenly he felt cold; a shiver ran down his spine; he felt as though he was being watched. "Stop it!" he told himself "There's noone here" but still he couldn't shake the eerie feeling. He walked into his office and sat down on the chair behind his desk; he picked up Sue Ellen's photograph which was sitting on the desk, the same picture that had been on his desk for so many years. He thought to himself how funny it was that with all the women that had been in his life; it was Sue Ellen's photograph that took pride of place on his desk. He rested his head back against the chair and closed his eyes. Time was ticking slowly; every minute seemed to last eternally, he'd only been here a few minutes but it seemed like longer. He held the photograph close to him; he thought about the time Sue Ellen and he had spent together these past few months; they definitely were making up for lost time. Maybe when he got her back they needed to get away from Dallas; just her, him and John Ross and be a family. He couldn't remember when they last took a family holiday if ever. JR looked down at his watch, another twenty minutes to go. He needed to see Sue Ellen; to hold her in his arms and wiped away the nightmare of the last 24 hours; however he was slightly worried about she might turn against him after this incident. She'd be as mad as hell at being held captive by Angelica for 24 hours; how was he going to convince her that it wasn't his fault. However the more he thought about it the more he realized that it was his fault; if he hadn't got involved with Angelica none of this would have happened. The night of the fundraiser they had made a total commitment to each other and from this moment on he vowed he would honour that commitment; making sure that everyday in his words and his actions he would show her that he truly loved her. The ring of the telephone jolted him out of his thoughts; two rings and the phone went dead; Harry's signal that Angelica was on his way; also meaning the Harry was close but not closed enough to be discovered. JR got up from the chair and looked out into the dark night. All he could see were shadows. He heard the door to the reception area open and stood waiting for someone to appear.

"All alone JR" he heard Angelica say

He swung round to face her

"Where's Sue Ellen?" he asked

"All in good time; my men are taking care of her" Angelica said

"If they hurt her, there wont be a hiding place for them" JR said

"You're threats are empty JR; I'm holding the cards now" Angelica laughed

JR reached into his desk and pulled out the deeds to Ewing Oil, Angelica reached for them. JR pulled back his hand.

"Give them here JR" Angelica said

"I want to see Sue Ellen" he replied

"The papers first" Angelica demanded

JR looked at her. Someone once said that the female was the most deadly of the species; now he saw that it was true. There was nothing Angelica wouldn't do to get what she wanted, even murder.

"JR the papers!" Angelica said

JR looked at the papers in his hands. If his plans failed and Harry didn't manage to pick up Angelica then Ewing Oil would be lost forever. Could he really handover his daddy's legacy like that; but in a flash he saw an image of Sue Ellen standing before him; the outstretched arms inviting him to hold her; the look of love in her eyes, a look he had never seen from anyone else in his life. Instantly he knew this was the right thing to do. He handed Angelica the papers.

"Now give me Sue Ellen" he said

Angelica smiled and walked towards the door.

"Angelica!" JR shouted

Ignoring him she walked out; JR felt himself hold his breath, had she tricked him? Had he now lost everything?

Five minutes past; JR felt his heart in his mouth. What was going on where was Angelica and more importantly where was Sue Ellen. He slumped back into his chair, putting his head in his hands he felt the tears form in his eyes. He had never wanted anyone as much as he wanted her at this moment, just to see her standing before him; even if she hated him. Now what did he do. The door to the office opened, JR looked up, his heart pounding.

"JR"

He got out of his seat and walked towards the door towards the woman standing in front of him. In slow motion he took her in his arms and finally he lost control of his emotions.

"Sue Ellen I'm so sorry!" he cried

Sue Ellen held him tightly; gently soothing him trying to calm him. She should be the one like this not him but now she was free she felt an overwhelming sense of peace. Now was the start of their new life; she wanted to tell him about the baby but first of all she needed to get home; away from this place; away from Angelica. They were interrupted by the sound of Angelica's voice. The couple broke apart and looked at Angelica standing there with her men.

"Boys, kindly escort Mr. and Mrs. Ewing out of the building "she said

The men moved forward but JR stopped them.

"Either one of you touch us and I'll rip you to pieces" he said

"Get out of my office JR" Angelica said

JR took hold of Sue Ellen's hand "Are you ready to go home?" he asked

"Yes" she replied

Together they walked out of the office and into the elevator. Once inside Sue Ellen turned to JR and said

"Are you really going to let her get away like that?"

JR looked at her "All in good time darlin'" he replied

They walked out of the building and were greeted by Harry McSween.

"Is she still in there?" Harry asked

"Yes" JR said

"And this is the only way out?" Harry said

"Of course" JR said

Harry motioned his men to stand guard on each side of the exit. Three men on each side there was no way that Angelica would get out of here free.

"We'll take care of it from here" Harry said

"Whatever it takes Harry" JR said

"Maybe we should have a little fun with them beforehand"" Harry said

"Harry, I just want you to get rid of them permanently" JR said

Sue Ellen and JR then walked to his car, after getting in JR turned to Sue Ellen

"Are you okay?" he asked

Sue Ellen sighed "Fine…just so tired" she replied

JR reached for her hand and squeezed it "It's over" he said "I promise Angelica will never come near you again"

Sue Ellen rested her head back on the headrest and closed her eyes. She was exhausted; the past twenty four hours had really taken it out of her; she just wanted to go home; have a bath and some decent food. Slowly she began to drift off to sleep. JR sneaked a look at her; she looked pale; he wanted to ask her what had happened and if anyone had harmed her but he was too afraid. He put his hand on her leg and gently rubbed it but she was fast asleep and didn't respond. Would things go back to how they were before the kidnapping? JR wondered or had things changed? Would Sue Ellen blame him for what had happened, would she go back to sleeping in her old room? He hated the idea of that but knew it might be a possibility once the full effect of what had happened hit her. The drive back to Southfork was quiet, Sue Ellen didn't stir once and JR was left with his own thoughts and fear. On arriving back at the ranch JR stopped the car and gently stroked Sue Ellen's cheek.

"Honey, we're home" He said gently

Sue Ellen opened her eyes "Thank God" she said

JR got out and walked around her side of the car, opening the door for her. As she got out she felt light headed and stumbled slightly. JR caught her before she fell. They walked into the house and were greeted by Clayton and Miss Ellie greeted them as they walked into the living room. Miss Ellie walked up to Sue Ellen and hugged her.

"Sue Ellen I'm so glad you're home" she said

"Me too" Sue Ellen replied "Where's John Ross?"

"He's with Pam" Miss Ellie answered "But he'll be back in the morning"

"I can go and get him if you want" JR said

Sue Ellen shook her head "No, he'll be in bed by now" she said

Clayton walked over to her "We were so worried about you" he said

"I'm fine" she said "I'm just so glad to be home"

"Would you like something to eat" Miss Ellie asked

"Yes please" Sue Ellen replied "But first of all I need a bath"

"How about I bring you something up in half an hour" Miss Ellie said

"Okay" Sue Ellen replied

"Do you want some help getting upstairs" JR asked

Sue Ellen looked at him "No, I'm fine; I'd appreciate spending some time on my own" she said

JR nodded and watched as she walked upstairs alone. He longed to go with her but knew that he needed to give her some space. Suddenly he felt so alone; all he wanted to do was hold her in his arms and make love to her. Silently he walked out of the living room and into the den; closing the door behind him he went and sat down.

**Sue Ellen and JR's room**

Sue Ellen got into a hot soapy bath; this felt so good. Part of her had wanted JR to join her but she knew that if she had let him one thing would have led to another and she just needed a little rest before she let JR have his way with her. She suddenly realized that she hadn't told him about the baby, she knew he was going to be so happy; it was the one thing that he had always wanted; another child. This time her pregnancy was going to be so different; she was determined to take care of herself actually no; forget that; she was determined to let JR take care of her. She remembered how things had been during her pregnancy with John Ross; after JR found out about Cliff, he had totally rejected her; hadn't even attempted to be nice to her. She closed her eyes and sank back further under the bubbles. This was perfect; just a shame she hadn't let JR come and scrub her back for her.

**The Den**

JR sat in the den alone; he was unsure of what to do. Sue Ellen didn't want him around, in fact at this precise moment she was probably moving back into her room. How did he let this mess happen, he should have taken care of Angelica sooner. The telephone rang and he picked it up.

"JR" the voice said

"Harry, Where are you!" JR replied

"We have Angelica and her men safely tucked away" Harry replied

"How did it go?" JR asked

"Let's just say we had the element of surprise" Harry said "They didn't suspect a thing"

JR laughed "You are sure they won't escape" he said

"JR; they're safely locked away with three armed guards watching them, they have no chance" Harry said

"Okay, give me the details of where they are and I'll pay them a little visit tomorrow" JR said

"I thought you wanted them got rid of" Harry said

"I do; but not before I've paid them back for what they did to my wife" JR said

Harry told him he would pick him up at the ranch in the afternoon and take him to where Angelica was being held.

"One more thing" JR said

"What's that" Harry asked

"No food or water tonight or tomorrow" JR said "I mean it Harry; I want them starved"

JR put down the phone and put his hands behind his head. Angelica and her men had better enjoy their last night on earth because JR was going to make sure that after tomorrow they were history.

**Sue Ellen and JR's room**

Sue Ellen had got out of the bath and dressed in her nightgown; wrapping her warm robe around her. She lay quietly on the bed, thinking about JR and how much she loved him, wanted him. Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Come in" she said

Miss Ellie appeared carrying a tray "I brought you some food" she said

Sue Ellen sat up "Thankyou" she said

"It's just some soup and bread, I thought that you wouldn't want too much this time of night" Miss Ellie said

Sue Ellen smiled "Home made soup is perfect this time of night especially if you made it" she replied "By the way where's JR"

Miss Ellie laughed "I have a feeling he's feeling a little rejected" she said "He's been in the den for the last half hour"

Sue Ellen smiled

"Is everything okay Sue Ellen" Miss Ellie asked "I mean between you and JR"

"Miss Ellie I promise you everything is fine" Sue Ellen said

"I think JR is worried that you might be moving back into your own room" Miss Ellie said "I must admit I did wonder"

"Miss Ellie JR and I made a total commitment to each other; nothing has changed" Sue Ellen said "I'm going to make things better than they've ever been; I'm going to do everything in my power to make up for the bad times"

"I just don't want to see John Ross torn apart again" Miss Ellie said

"It won't happen; I have everything I've ever wanted" Sue Ellen said "I love your son more than anything in this world, I always have and John Ross is a product of that love. I know things have been bad for John Ross and I feel so guilty about how he's been torn apart by two volatile parents but the one thing he has always had is our love; I heard him tell you not so long ago that he knew that we weren't really together; that it was only an act but things are going to be so different. From this moment on our son is going to be brought up by two parents who love each other and are not afraid to show it"

Miss Ellie smiled "You know how JR is about showing his feelings" she said

"I know but he's willing to learn; he's begun to open up to me and I know I can break down those walls he built between him and emotions" Sue Ellen said

"So you wont be needing your old room" Miss Ellie said

"Ahh, I didn't say that!" Sue Ellen laughed

"But you just said everything was fine" Miss Ellie said

Sue Ellen laughed "It is but I want to redecorate that room"

"Why" Miss Ellie asked

"To create a nursery" Sue Ellen smiled

Miss Ellie looked at her "Sue Ellen are you.."

"Pregnant" Sue Ellen said "Yes"

"Does JR know" Miss Ellie asked

"No I'm going to tell him when he manages to come up here" Sue Ellen laughed

Miss Ellie kissed and hugged her "That is the best news I've heard all week" she said

"I know" Sue Ellen said

"The kidnapping…..nothing happened..I mean you and the baby are okay?" Miss Ellie asked

"We're fine" Sue Ellen said

"I'll let you get something to eat, you sure I can't get you anything else" Miss Ellie asked

"Only JR" Sue Ellen laughed "Please don't say anything to him"

"I promise" Miss Ellie said "I'm so happy for you and JR and I'm just so glad that he's finally woken up to what a wonderful wife he has"

Miss Ellie went back downstairs and Sue Ellen finished her meal.

**The Den**

Miss Ellie walked into the den and saw JR slumped in his chair.

"What are you doing in here" she asked

"Just had some business to take care of" JR replied

"No you're not; you're hiding just like you did when you were little and you thought you were in trouble. You used to find a hiding place and stay there until you felt everything was safe" she laughed

"Sue Ellen doesn't want me" JR said "She hates me for what happened to her"

"What makes you say that?" Miss Ellie asked

"You saw her when she went upstairs; she wouldn't let me near her" JR replied "I've ruined everything, we were talking about renewing our vows at Christmas but now I guess that wont be happening"

"So why aren't you up there trying to talk to her" Miss Ellie asked

"There's no point" JR said

"You're going to have to talk to her soon" Miss Ellie said

JR sighed; he knew she was right but he didn't feel up to a confrontation with Sue Ellen. Miss Ellie walked to the door and turned around.

"Just talk to her JR" she said as she left the room.

Half an hour later; JR plucked up the courage to go upstairs. He opened the door of his room and found it empty. He checked to see if Sue Ellen was in the bathroom but that too was empty. He knew where he would find her and walked to the room opposite. Gently he knocked on the door.

"Come in" came the reply

JR walked in to find Sue Ellen standing near her dressing table. JR went and sat on the bed.

"How was your bath?" he asked

"Fine" she said "And I thoroughly enjoyed Miss Ellie's homemade soup"

JR looked around the room "Are you moving back in here?" he asked

Sue Ellen looked at him; he had that little boy lost look on his face that she found so irresistible.

"Thought I might redecorate" she said

JR's heart sank; so this was the end; Sue Ellen moving back into her old room, their newfound relationship over. Sue Ellen walked over to the bed and laid down beside him. JR looked at her, what was she thinking? he wondered. Sue Ellen looked at him she was enjoying teasing him. Finally she put her lips to his and kissed him.

"How does Winnie the Pooh wallpaper sound to you" she whispered in his ear.

"What?" JR said

"I said how does Winnie the Pooh wallpaper sound to you" she laughed

"Sue Ellen…." JR started but she kissed him before he could finish.

"Does this mean?" JR asked

Sue Ellen smiled "I'm pregnant!"

JR laughed "Oh God……you are amazing; I love you so much" he said

"Does this mean you're happy?" she asked

"I am the happiest person alive" he said "All my dreams have just come true"

"You still haven't answered my question" she laughed

JR kissed her "Winnie the Pooh wallpaper sounds great!" he said

"I thought so that way it's doesn't matter whether it's a boy or a girl" Sue Ellen said

"When is it due?" JR asked

"In about seven months" Sue Ellen replied

JR mentally counted back eight weeks; Sue Ellen saw his brain working.

"That means you conceived the night of the fundraiser" he said

"Well at least you remembered this time" she laughed

"How could I forget that night; it was so special" he replied

"I know" she said

"Sue Ellen when you went upstairs I thought things were finished between us; you didn't want me with you" he said

Sue Ellen lifted his face to her "JR I wanted you but I needed to get some rest and I knew if I let you come into the bathroom with me the last thing I'd get is rest" she laughed "I love you"

"I thought you hated me because of what happened with Angelica" He said

Sue Ellen shook her head "No, how could I hate you when I'm carrying your child inside me" she said

JR put his hand on her stomach "This time will be different" He said "I will be with you every step of the way"

"You better" she said "And that includes helping me decorate this room"

"If we use this as the nursery it means you no longer have a bedroom" JR said

"Oh I have a bedroom, it happens to be yours too and I'm not planning on leaving there ever" she said

JR tenderly kissed her; his hands went inside her robe and he parted it; suddenly he stopped what he was doing.

"Let's go back to our room" he said

"No" she said as her hands traveled down to his trousers. JR removed her robe and rolled her nightgown up; Sue Ellen lifted her head so that he could remove the gown completely. He then worked his way down her body; stopping at her stomach and tenderly kissed it. Sue Ellen watched him; she felt so relaxed and happy. JR carried on down her body finding her womanhood he gently sucked on it. Sue Ellen moaned in ecstasy

"Ohh JR I want you" she said

JR continued to suck on her; Sue Ellen opened her legs wider allowing him better access to her, JR inserted two fingers inside of her and moved them around. Sue Ellen bucked off the bed; she didn't know how much more she could take; JR then worked his way back up her body; Sue Ellen's hands went to the zip on his trousers; she was desperate to find what she wanted. JR guided her hand to his manhood and she gently stroked it.

"That feels so good" he said

She increased the pace of her stroking; JR felt himself getting more and more aroused; he wanted to be inside of her. He got up of the bed and removed his trousers and the rest of his clothes. He lay back down on the bed and Sue Ellen moved on top of him. Taking him in her hand she guided him inside of her then slowly they found their rhythm. Sue Ellen increased her pace as she rode him wanting to take them to the point of no return. Finally JR could take no more and pulled her hips down onto him allowing himself to go further inside her. Finally they climaxed; JR screamed her name telling her he loved her. When they were finished they lay wrapped up in each other, neither one wanting to let go off the other.

"That was so good" JR said

Sue Ellen kissed him; her hand still playing with his manhood.

"I love you" she said

"I'm going to make everything perfect" JR said "And don't worry Angelica is going to pay for what she did to you"

Sue Ellen held him tighter "Hey why don't we get dressed and go downstairs and tell Miss Ellie and Clayton about the baby" she said

"I want a couple more minutes with you" he replied

They lay still for a while both holding each other tightly; not wanting to let the other go. The memories of the last few days disappearing as they both began to look forward to the future.

Ten minutes later JR made an effort to move;

"Hey you going to get dressed and come downstairs" JR asked

Sue Ellen looked at him "I was comfortable here" she replied. Getting up she moved closer to him and put her arms around his neck.

"Mmmm, carry on like that and we might just have to put off telling momma our good news until tomorrow" JR laughed

Sue Ellen kissed him "You have no idea what I want to do to you at this precise moment in time" she said

"I think I have!" JR replied "But we really should go back downstairs"

Sue Ellen put her hand on his manhood and gently stroked him "You sure about that" she said

"Maybe a little bit longer wouldn't hurt" JR said

Sue Ellen pushed him down onto the bed; starting at his mouth she kissed her way down his body. Finding her way to his manhood she looked back at him and smiled. JR closed his eyes as she took him in his mouth; she began sucking on him as a baby sucks a bottle, she looked at him and smiled; going back to what she was doing she began to hum; JR opened his eyes.

"Sue Ellen………no….stop….I can't take much more" he said

Sue Ellen ignored him and increased her pace; JR bucked as he felt his climax hit him and he spilt his seed inside her. Sue Ellen swallowed every last drop.

"God….I tell you what noone has ever done that for me the way that you do it" he said

"Mmm and you taste so good!" she said

JR looked at her "Come here!" he said

Sue Ellen got up and crawled onto the bed next to him. JR laughed as he cuddled her closer to him

"I thought you wanted to get some rest" he said

"I did but just at this moment I want you" she said "I was terrified in that warehouse, I thought I would never see you or John Ross again"

"Hey come on did you really think that I'd put Ewing Oil before you?" he asked

"I know how much Ewing Oil means to you; how you wanted to make your father proud of you by making the company a success" Sue Ellen replied

"Sue Ellen, nothing is more important than you" he said "I made a promise to you and I'm going to keep it. From this moment I'm going to show you how precious you are to me; for once in my life I'm going to take a chance and not bottle up my feelings for you; I'm going to show you and our children how much I love you every day for the rest of our lives"

Sue Ellen felt tears form in her eyes "All I ever wanted was your love" she said

"I know" JR said "But you loved me too much…….I didn't know how to return that love and it scared me"

"JR you should never be scared of expressing your feeling" Sue Ellen said "From this moment on I want you to talk to me about anything that's bothering you; if you have a problem; whatever it is I want to be the one you run to, like I told you before I don't want you bottling things up, I'm here as your best friend, your lover and your wife"

"Okay…I'll try…but it won't be easy" JR said

"JR sometimes you just have to trust people and the people who you should trust most in the world are your family who love you" Sue Ellen said "While we talking about confiding in people; what's going to happen about Ewing Oil"

JR sighed "Angelica has got the deeds to Ewing Oil and an official letter stating that I'm handing her the company, however shortly after we left Harry and his men picked them up when they walked out of the building" he said

"Are you sure they can't escape" Sue Ellen said

JR looked at her "They didn't touch you did they…I mean….they didn't try anything" he said

"No" Sue Ellen replied "They threatened to but didn't, I was just scared for the baby"

"Why didn't you tell me where you were going that day?" JR said "I would have come with you"

"JR, if I had told you where I was going you would have wanted to know why; and I wanted to make sure that my feelings were correct before I said anything to you. I knew how upset you would have been if I had told you that I thought I was pregnant and it had been a false alarm" she replied

"You know, Angelica is going to pay for what she did to you" JR said "She's not going to get away with it!"

"What are you going to do?" Sue Ellen asked

"That's nothing for you to worry about!" he replied "I'm going to meet Harry tomorrow and he'll take care of everything; I promise you she will never come near you again!"

Sue Ellen snuggled closer to him and kissed him "I love you" she said

"I love you too" he replied "By the way you are happy about this baby?"

Sue Ellen looked at him and smiled "I have to admit at first I thought it was a bit soon; I mean we've only been back together for eight weeks, however now that I'm used to the idea I'm happy; this is a fresh start for both of us; a chance to put things right and go through this pregnancy together unlike last time" she said "I want this baby so much and I know John Ross wants a brother or sister"

"Really" JR said

"I heard him talking to Miss Ellie some time ago; she was telling him about you, Gary and Bobby; John Ross told her he knew that he wouldn't have any brothers because his parents didn't love each other" she replied "I think it was then that I knew I wanted to put my family back together; I didn't want my son thinking his parents hated each other, that we were putting on an act for him"

"That kiss in the kitchen; I was surprised you didn't slap me for that!" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "No, I think I'd already made up my mind at that point that I wanted you back" she said "Then at the fundraiser……you were perfect, you made a real effort not talking about business and just supporting me that I remember all night long the only thing I wanted to do was go back to Southfork and into your bed"

"Will you still renew our vows?" JR asked

"Yes" she replied "This time will be forever; I want our children to be brought up in a loving secure relationship; not the volatile one that John Ross has seen, I feel so guilty about what we put him through"

"So do I" JR said "But we can make it up to him; I'm not going to let Ewing Oil consume me anymore, I want to spend more time with you two; take fishing trips with John Ross"

"He'd like that" Sue Ellen said "It's getting late; maybe we should say goodnight to Miss Ellie and Clayton"

They got up and got dressed and went back downstairs; finding Miss Ellie and Clayton in the living room.

"Hey you two I was just going to make a drink, would you like something?" Miss Ellie asked

"Well…we only came to say goodnight…but since you're offering a coffee would be good" JR said

JR and Sue Ellen went and sat down on the sofa.

"Sue Ellen, how are you/" Clayton asked

"I'm fine although it's been a long twenty four hours" she replied

"JR, have the police caught up with Angelica" Clayton asked

JR sighed "Angelica is being taken care of" he replied "I promise you she will never come near this family again"

"You put your wife's life in danger JR, how could you be so stupid" Clayton said

"Please Clayton it's over!" Sue Ellen said "I'm fine…I just want to forget the whole thing"

Miss Ellie returned with the coffee and everyone took their drinks. JR looked at Sue Ellen and held her hand tightly. He looked up at Clayton.

"Clayton I know what you think about me; but this past twenty four hours has taught me a valuable lesson. I love Sue Ellen more than anything in this world and there is nothing I wouldn't do for her or John Ross. When we got back together we made a pact that we would wipe out the bad times and start over and that it was I intend to do" he said "I promise you I'm not going to hurt her again, beside we have some good news for you"

"What news" Miss Ellie asked

JR looked at Sue Ellen "Well do you want to tell them or shall I?" he asked

Sue Ellen smiled at him "You" she said

"We're going to have a baby" JR said

"Congratulations" Miss Ellie said as she went over and hugged Sue Ellen "When is it due"

"About seven months time!" Sue Ellen said

Clayton went over and shook JR's hand "I'm happy for both of you; but please JR take care of her" he said

"I promise" JR replied

Clayton then hugged Sue Ellen.

"Momma, we want to turn Sue Ellen's old room into a nursery" JR said "We thought that as it's directly opposite our room it would be the perfect place"

"Sounds fine by me; of course it does mean that Sue Ellen will lose her room" Miss Ellie said

JR laughed "Don't worry she wont be needing it anymore" he said

They stayed chatting for another half an hour; Sue Ellen desperately wanted to go back upstairs and continue what they had been doing before. She had felt tired earlier on this evening but now all she wanted to do was make love to JR. Finally they said goodnight and went upstairs. On entering their room Sue Ellen put her arms around JR's neck and pulled him into a kiss.

"I want you" she said

JR lifted her up and carried her to the bed; setting her down he began to get undressed.

"Just hurry up" Sue Ellen said

"Pregnancy seems to have made you impatient my love" JR laughed

After he had finished undressing he went and lay down beside her, then tenderly began kissing her. He then began to slowly remove her clothes. Sue Ellen felt herself getting agitated; she wanted him inside her, she pulled him closer to her.

"JR you are driving me crazy" she said

JR laughed and began kissing his way down her body; reaching her breast he spent time kissing each one, lovingly sucking on each nipple as his hand wandered down to her thigh and he found her womanhood. Gently he stroked it as he continued kissing her.

Sue Ellen screamed "God…..JR….stop teasing me!" she said

He began to move lower down her body and slipping off the bed he knelt in front of her; Sue Ellen opened her legs wider for him and he inserted his tongue inside her, gently licking her, then he began to suck on her love button, then taking two fingers he inserted them inside of her. JR knew that he was close and increased the speed of his actions. Sue Ellen squirmed; she could feel herself lose control; she wanted JR so badly; she needed to feel himself inside of her.

"JR…….I can't take much more" she said

"Let go…" JR said; just as he said it Sue Ellen's walls constricted around his fingers and she felt herself explode calling JR's name. Finally JR stood up and climbed on top of her; opening her legs wider he entered her and slowly pushed himself deeper into her. Finding their rhythm they moved as one until both of them found themselves over the edge. When they were finished JR took Sue Ellen in his arms and held her tightly. She felt safe and secure realizing that there wasn't a place she'd sooner be. They lay quietly for a while.

"Hey what are you thinking?" Sue Ellen asked

"Just about how much I love you" He said "And how much I'm looking forward to our new baby"

Sue Ellen kissed him "So am I, in fact I'm looking forward to watching you change dirty diapers" she laughed

JR groaned "I forgot about that!" he said

Sue Ellen laughed "If I remember rightly you never changed John Ross' diapers but still I'm here to teach you" she said

"I've just thought, I've never held a newborn baby; John Ross was six months old when I held him" he said

"JR you'll be fine" she replied

"You do realize that I'm going to spoil you for the next eight months" JR said "After all I've got to make up for last time"

"That's all in the past sweetheart" Sue Ellen said "I told you I wanted to wipe out the past and start afresh and this is the perfect new beginning"

"I was thinking; we have never taken a family holiday with John Ross. Schools out in a couple of weeks what do you say that we get away from Dallas for a while" He said

"Sounds good…where would we go?" she asked

"Anywhere you want…however I was thinking why not take John Ross to Disney and then spend a couple of weeks in Hawaii" he said

"Sounds good to me" she replied

"We could also take Christopher; to keep John Ross company "JR said" What do you think?"

"Are you sure?" Sue Ellen said

"Well he's still my nephew…even though Bobby is no longer here and John Ross likes having him around" JR said

Sue Ellen thought for a moment "Mmm okay…..I've never really thought about it but he's Kristin's son which makes him my blood nephew and John Ross' real cousin" she said

"How do you feel about that…I know you must hate Kristin" JR asked

"No, I don't hate her; I just didn't like her at times" Sue Ellen said "But at least I know her son is being well taken care of"

"Okay why don't we go into town at some point and pick up some travel brochures" JR said

"Yes and while we're in town we can go looking for wallpaper and paint to decorate the nursery" Sue Ellen said

"You have some good ideas Mrs Ewing but right now I think you need some sleep" JR said "You should be tired"

Sue Ellen yawned "Good idea" she said as she snuggled closer into JR. JR kissed her and watched as she drifted off to sleep.

The following morning JR woke early and looked down at this sleeping wife; she seemed so peaceful that he decided to let her sleep longer and slowly got out of bed being careful not to wake her. Once he was dressed he went downstairs finding Miss Ellie and Clayton outside on the patio eating breakfast.

"Mornin' momma, mornin' Clayton" he said

"Good morning JR, where's Sue Ellen" Miss Ellie asked

"She's tired, so I let her sleep in" JR replied "I don't want her over dong things"

JR fixed himself some breakfast and sat down. Ten minutes later a car pulled up and John Ross and Pam got out.

"Hi everyone" Pam said

Hi Pam, how are you?" Miss Ellie said

"I'm fine John Ross couldn't wait to come home" Pam replied

"Daddy is momma home?" John Ross asked

"Hi buddy, yes she is" JR replied

"Good, I'm going to see her" John Ross said racing inside.

"John Ross….don't wake your momma" JR started but it was too late his son didn't hear him.

JR turned back to Pam and said "Where's Christopher"

"He's with Mark" Pam replied

"Well Sue Ellen and I are thinking of going on holiday and we were wondering if you would let Christopher join us as he would be good company for John Ross" JR said

"mmm, can I get back to you on that" she replied

"Okay, well I better go and find my son" JR said as he got up and walked inside.


	4. Chapter 4

**Sue Ellen and JR's room**

John Ross opened the door to his parents' room and quietly walked in. Seeing his mom asleep in bed he quietly got up onto the bed beside her and kissed her cheek. Sue Ellen opened her eyes and smiled to see her son staring down at her. She sat up and pulled him closer to her.

"Hey sweetheart, I missed you" she said

"I missed you too momma, I was scared you weren't going to come back" John Ross replied

"Of course I was coming back I love you and your daddy so much" she said

JR opened the door to his bedroom and smiled seeing Sue Ellen and John Ross cuddled up. He walked up and lay on the bed next to them, giving Sue Ellen a kiss on the cheek.

"You didn't wake me JR" Sue Ellen said

"I thought I would let you sleep" JR said

JR looked at Sue Ellen and then said "Hey John Ross, we've got something to tell you"

"What daddy?" his son replied

"Well how would you like a brother or sister?" JR asked

"Really!" John Ross replied "It would be so cool"

"Well you're going to have one" Sue Ellen said

"When" John Ross asked

"Not yet but soon and we need you to be a big brother and help us look after it" she said "Do you think you could do that?"

"Yes, but will you still love me" her son asked

Sue Ellen pulled him closer to her "Of course we will" she said

John Ross looked at JR. JR pulled both of them into a hug "John Ross we will never stop loving you" he said

"Did you have fun with Christopher?" Sue Ellen asked

"Yes momma, we played on the bikes, then we went in the pool. I also took my tapes with me so I could listen to you tell me a story" he replied

Sue Ellen smiled; she was so glad to be back at Southfork; she felt an overpowering sense of love for her husband and son. Lovingly she kissed both of them.

"What was that for?" JR smiled

"I'm just so happy to be here with the two men I love most in this world" she replied

"We're just so glad you're here, aren't we John Ross" JR said

"Yes" his son replied

The family stayed cuddled up for a while; enjoying each others company. JR and Sue Ellen told John Ross how they were going to have a family holiday and that Christopher would hopefully join them.

Later on in the day JR knew he had to meet Harry Mcsween and deal with Angelica. Sue Ellen was outside sat in a sunchair reading a book while John Ross was playing in the pool. JR walked over to her.

"Darlin' I have to go out for a while" he said

"Where?" Sue Ellen asked

"I have to see Harry and then we're going to decide what to do with Angelica" JR said

"Be careful" she said

"I will and I promise I will be back as soon as I can" he said

JR got into the car and took the directions Harry had given him out of his pocket. He took a deep breath and put the car into drive; taking one last look at Sue Ellen as he drove away. He wanted to get this over and done with so that he could get back to her. After reaching his destination he found Harry waiting for him.

"Where are they?" He said

"In there" Harry said pointing to an old garage; "My men have been guarding them all evening"

"You haven't given them any food or water" JR said

"No just as you instructed" Harry said

JR walked into the garage to find Angelica and her men tied up.

"Well, well, well what have we here" JR said

"Let us go" Angelica said

"Give me one good reason why I should" JR said

"I'll make you pay for this" Angelica said

JR went and crouched in front of her "No you wont, in fact take a good look around as this will be the last place you see. Noone touches a member of my family and gets away with it" he said "You're lucky Sue Ellen's okay because if you had laid one finger on her…….."

"You would have done what" Angelica asked

JR turned to Harry "I think it's time you took care of them Harry" he said

"My pleasure Mr Ewing" Harry replied

"Well Angelica, I would say it's been nice knowing you unfortunately it hasn'" JR said "Goodbye"

JR walked out of the garage and turned to Harry "You know what you have to do" he said

Harry indicated for his men to follow him into the garage. JR walked back to his car, he waited a few minutes and heard four shots fired out. The nightmare was over; Harry would take care of everything all he had to do was get back to Sue Ellen.

**Southfork**

Sue Ellen was sat outside on one of the sunchairs reading a book and keeping an eye on her son when Miss Ellie came out and joined her.

"Sue Ellen how are you?" Miss Ellie asked

"Fine" Sue Ellen replied "It's such a lovely day out here"

"Where's JR?" Miss Ellie asked

Sue Ellen sighed "He's gone to meet Harry McSween; they have a little bit of business to take care of" she said

"Hmm, and I thought once he knew you were pregnant he would want to spend more time with you" Miss Ellie said

"Oh he'll be back shortly" Sue Ellen said "In fact he's planning on taking John Ross and I on holiday"

"You mean he's taking time of from Ewing Oil?" Miss Ellie said

"Yes……we're also going shopping to choose some wallpaper for the nursery" Sue Ellen said

"JR seems to be more enthusiastic about this pregnancy" Miss Ellie said

Sue Ellen looked over at John Ross "Yes……I guess…..well things weren't good between us" she replied "There are so many things which I…we regret about last time…I put John Ross' life in danger"

"It wasn't all your fault" Miss Ellie said

"I look at him now…..and I think for the first time in his life…..he's happy…..he's not caught in the middle of two warring parents" Sue Ellen said "When I look back on his life I feel so guilty….there were times when I wasn't there for him and I should have been. The first few months of his life I couldn't bear to hold him…I was terrified that if I allowed myself to love him that I would be hurt"

"Sue Ellen, he's fine. The one thing he has always know is that he's got two parents who love him very much" Miss Ellie said "So what are you hoping for this time a boy or a girl?"

"Ahh" Sue Ellen replied "I really don't mind but I guess I would love to have a girl just to see JR's reaction"

"He'd spoil her rotten then kill any man who tried to take her away from him" Miss Ellie laughed

"True" Sue Ellen said

"Are you going to give up working?" Miss Ellie asked

"I remember Jock once saying that Ewing Women didn't work and I have a feeling that JR has inherited some of his father's beliefs, however the Graison foundation is important to me and I still want to be involved with it; for a start…it gives me some independence…I'm not just 'Mrs JR Ewing" Sue Ellen said "So yes…I want to continue to work in some form or another; whether it's working at the foundation or possibly working from here when the baby is born….I mean other women have worked and coped with motherhood, why can't I"

"Because you're Mrs JR Ewing" Miss Ellie laughed

"Oh I know this isn't going to be easy" Sue Ellen said "I just need to convince him that even though I want to continue with Graison's that he and my children are my priority; I promised you they will always come first…..I still have nightmares about John Ross' appendicitis….I feel so guilty that I should have been there and I wasn't……I will never ever leave a child of mine when they're ill"

"That wasn't your fault and JR should never have attacked you like he did…I remember the incident after Bobby's death…he was so cruel; I wished I had done something to stop him" Miss Ellie said

"JR was grieving and so were you..there was nothing you could have done at that point. The awful thing was that part of me wanted to hold him and help him through his grief but he wouldn't let me" Sue Ellen said

"I remember when Clayton and I found you after you went missing…it destroyed me seeing you like that and I knew I had to get JR to sign the papers to put you in the sanitarium" Miss Ellie said

"I hated that place…..but it made me face what I really was and I knew I had to change…I had to overcome the alcohol problem for myself and John Ross" Sue Ellen said "At that point I knew I was on my own…..JR…….JR didn't love me anymore….I knew I wouldn't have his support"

"You two have come so far this past year" Miss Ellie said

Sue Ellen laughed "I fought against my feelings for him I really did; the last thing I wanted was to get back with him…partly for my own sanity as I knew it wouldn't last. Then as time went by…I…I found him irresistible; he was trying to change I could see that; I remember the day he took John Ross on the field trip; that evening he walked in carrying his son asleep in his arms and it was then that I realized how much I still loved him. This time things are going to be so different" she said

"I hope so" Miss Ellie said "By the way Clayton and I are just going into town..do you need anything?"

"No thank you" Sue Ellen replied

**JR's Car**

JR's only thoughts were to get back to Sue Ellen and John Ross as fast as he could. He hadn't gone back inside the warehouse to see what had happened; part of him didn't want to know but he was relieved that Angelica was out of their lives for good. His thoughts returned to Sue Ellen, John Ross and the new baby. He was so happy that he thought his heart was going to burst. He remembered the time Sue Ellen was pregnant with John Ross and how he had treated her; looking back on that period of their life it wasn't surprising that Sue Ellen had sought comfort elsewhere; he had constantly rejected her and quite openly cheated on her without a care for her feelings. However the one thing he couldn't understand was why she chose the man she had to get back at him…Cliff Barnes of all people….what was is about him that appealed to her. A thought crossed his mind when he considered the females that Cliff and he had in common….first Sue Ellen then Afton and Mandy….something was wrong here…they couldn't agree on anything and yet they had the same taste in women. He suddenly thought of Jamie, his cousin and Cliff's wife; another victim of Angelica…she had done nothing wrong and yet she was dead; he felt guilty…..what was happening to him…he never felt guilty about anything; it must be the effect Sue Ellen was having on him. He promised this time that Sue Ellen was going to enjoy her pregnancy…he was going to pander to her every need….he was going to cherish and love her; be there for her every step of the way….hold her tightly in his arms at night and hopefully feel the kicking of the new life inside her; a new life created out of love. His thoughts went to John Ross, his precious son. He loved that child more than anything apart from Sue Ellen and he was gong to make sure John Ross knew that. He remembered the pride he felt when he first held him and the relief he felt at finally knowing that John Ross was his son and noone could ever take him away. He knew he had treated his son appallingly during his early months…but the pain of knowing that Sue Ellen didn't want him and that his son was Cliff Barnes' son was too much for him and he took his anger out on a tiny defenseless baby..he cringed when he thought of some of the names he had called him. He thanked God that John Ross had been too young to understand. He was relieved when he saw the gates of Southfork before him and picked up speed…wanting to get back to his family quickly.

**Southfork**

Sue Ellen saw JR's car drive up and park; she got out of her chair and went to greet him. Getting out of the car he pulled her into his arms and kissed her. Looking around he realized that they were almost on their own apart from John Ross.

"Hey where is everyone?" He asked

"Your mother and Clayton went shopping and I've been resting by the pool watching our son" she replied "How did your meeting go"

JR looked at her and wondered how much he should tell her "Fine" he said "It's over"

"She's in police custody isn't she….I mean….we are safe" she asked

JR tenderly touched her cheek "Trust me" he said "I'm going to get change and join our son in the pool"

Watching him walk away from him; something told her that he wasn't being completely honest with her and he promised he would.

Walking over to the pool she called to her son "John Ross, I'm going to talk to your daddy…just stay in the shallow end" she said

"Okay momma" he replied

She walked into the house and upstairs to their bedroom; JR was changing into his swimming trunks when she walked in.

"Hey" he said on seeing her

"JR….what happened I need to know" she said

"I told you!" he replied

"You told me what you thought I needed to hear…but there's more to this" she said "You promised no more secrets…now tell me the truth"

JR sighed; he wasn't sure what her reaction would be "Okay" he sat sitting down; reaching for her hand he pulled her towards him and she fell into his lap.

"Harry's boys took care of them….I couldn't trust the police to keep them locked up" he said

"What do you mean…took care of them" Sue Ellen said

"Well I went in there had a little chat with Angelica…then went back outside…Harry and his boys went back inside and I heard four gunshots before I left" he said

"They're dead" Sue Ellen said

"Yes" JR replied "Did you honestly expect me to let them live…hell what happens next time they escape from the police…who will they take….you, John Ross, momma, Clayton…I wasn't prepared to take the risk"

"What happens when their bodies are discovered?" Sue Ellen said

"Darlin' I really do trust Harry to take care of things; he's never let me down before" JR said

Sue Ellen sighed, she didn't want to fight with him; all she wanted to do was love him.

"Okay JR…No more crooked deals" she said "Promise me"

"I promise" he said as he gently kissed her neck.

"JR we should get back to our son" she protested but JR's power over her was greater and she found herself succumbing to his seduction.

"In a while" JR said "He's fine"

Sue Ellen got up from his lap and pushed him down onto the bed before climbing on top of him.

"You are incorrigible" she said

"But you wouldn't have me any other way" he laughed

Her hands wandered down to his swimming trunks and she placed one hand inside them; gently stroking him.

"mmmm, I like that" He said "In fact I could stay here all day and let you do that"

"I bet you could" she replied

JR's hands wandered to the back of her bikini top and he undid the straps then his hands went to her bottoms and gently he slid them off her. JR rolled them over so he was on top of her Sue Ellen then helped him out of his trunks. Taking him in her hand again she guided him inside of her and they slowly made love. Finding their rhythm they reached the heights of ecstasy both crying out with pleasure at the feeling they got from each other. Afterwards they lay quietly for a while; not wanting to let go off each other, their bodies still locked together as one. Finally JR spoke.

"I don't know about you but I could do with a swim" he said

"Me too" Sue Ellen replied

JR got off the bed and walked to the door; he was just about to open it when Sue Ellen called him.

"JR! I think you've forgotten something" she said as she waved his swimming trunks at him.

After putting their swimming costumes again they returned to the pool and their son. Sue Ellen watched JR and John Ross playing with the football in the water; her life was just about perfect at this moment.

Later that evening JR and Sue Ellen after they had put John Ross to bed; they strolled hand in hand through the pastures of Southfork. It was a beautiful warm evening.

"John Ross seems happy" JR said "He's so excited about the new baby"

"I know" Sue Ellen said, resting her head on his shoulder; they came upon the treehouse and decided to rest.

"This is one of my favourite places" JR said "Daddy built this for Bobby but I'm sure I had more fun in it then him"

"Yes…I remember the long hot summer of '68; I came to Southfork most weekends and you used to leave me a note with some flowers on the patio table telling me to meet you here" Sue Ellen said "I used to ride up on the horse and you'd be waiting at the entrance to the house calling out my special name"

"Yellow Rose of Texas" JR laughed

"Then once I climbed up into the house; you immediately took me in your arms and kissed me" she said

"You would never let me go any further" He laughed

"Didn't stop you from trying did it" Sue Ellen replied "God, you will never know how hard it was for me to resist you; I wanted you so badly but I promised myself that I wouldn't sleep with you unless we were married"

"I think the treehouse is the only place we never made love" JR said

"Possibly" Sue Ellen laughed "I remember when you were recovering after Kristin shot you, I don't think that there's an area of Southfork that we didn't make love in, including the pool"

"I used to pray that momma and daddy would go out so we could be alone" JR said

"The pool, the barn, the den, the kitchen, on top of the piano…God JR we couldn't get enough of each other" Sue Ellen said "We were on fire"

"Making up for lost time….in fact I'm planning on revisiting those times" He said

Sue Ellen laughed "I had a chat with Miss Ellie today" she said

"Oh" JR said

"Yes….she was wondering whether I was going to continue to work" she replied

"Let me guess your answer" JR said "You told her you had no intentions of giving up"

"JR; Graison's Foundation is good for me; I finally have my own independence and I'm enjoying it…however I will slow down and maybe see if I can work from home after the baby is born" she said

"You don't need to work though" JR said

"I know…but this is worthwhile…I'm making a difference…if I can help Graison's save lives by fundraising then I'm happy but I promise you I will never forsake you or our children; you're my priority" she said

"Okay….but I don't want to see you overdo things" JR said "I want to be there to look after you….I want to make up for what happened with your last pregnancy"

Sue Ellen kissed him "I'm planning on letting you look after me" she said "I want you with me every step of the way"

"Tomorrow we're going shopping for wallpaper" JR said

"You're in a hurry" Sue Ellen replied

"Well once we have that room decorated you won't be able to move back there" JR laughed

"That's not going to happen" Sue Ellen said "You're stuck with me Ewing"

JR took her in his arms and held her tightly; he loved her so much and realized that he always had, he had been too stupid to see what was before him….a beautiful, loyal wife who adored him. Suddenly something caught his attention. He looked over to Bobby's grave.

"What's wrong" Sue Ellen said

JR stood up and walked over; crouching down he picked up a box which had been placed there. Walking back to Sue Ellen he sat back down.

"Where did that come from, I wonder" he said

"Open it!" Sue Ellen said

JR opened the box and gasped in surprise.

"What is it" Sue Ellen asked

JR handed her the box without saying anything.

Sue Ellen opened the box "It's a watch" she said

JR took it from her and turned the watch over so she could read the inscription. Sue Ellen looked confused

"Jock – 30 years of marriage – love always Ellie" she said reading what was written "I don't understand where has this come from"

"Sue Ellen, I remember momma giving that to daddy for their 30th wedding anniversary" he said "He never took it off…in fact we were sure he had it with him when he died"

"Maybe he didn't" Sue Ellen said "Maybe Miss Ellie found it and……." She stopped not wanting to say the next part of her sentence.

JR looked at her and gently stroked her face "It's okay, I know what you were say" he said "You think she put it on the grave because Bobby was daddy's favourite" he said

Sue Ellen cuddled into him "I'm sorry"

"Sue Ellen it doesn't make sense, if momma wanted the watch to be with Bobby she would have put it in the coffin with him; not leave it on the grave twelve months later" he said "Someone put it here for it to be found"

"Who would do something like that?" Sue Ellen asked

"Look at it this way….momma knows that the treehouse is one of our favourite spots where we can be alone….do you honestly think she would leave the watch there knowing that I may find it….leave it on Bobby's grave…daddy's favorite" JR said "She knew what he meant to me wouldn't she have given it to me?"

Knowing how much that would have hurt JR, she couldn't believe Miss Ellie would have done something like that "No sweetheart I don't believe she put it there but someone did within the last week" Sue Ellen said

JR stared into space; deep in thought. Sue Ellen watched his mind working, she didn't have to ask what he was thinking about she already knew.

"Talk to me" she said

JR smiled "I was just thinking" he replied

"About what?" Sue Ellen asked

"Daddy" JR replied "I was thinking back to the barbeque when we found out that he was missing; I remember going upstairs and finding you and John Ross curled up on the bed; At that point all I wanted to do was hold you both in my arms…I needed my family. Then I asked to stay at Southfork for the night, I told you I'd stay in the guest room"

"That night I woke up…first I checked John Ross in the nursery; then I wandered to the room you were in and almost knocked on the door" Sue Ellen said "I knew what Jock's disappearance would do to you and I just wanted to hold you in my arms..but something stopped me…I so desperately wanted to comfort you….but I knew …….."

"Sue Ellen I wanted you in my arms that night…just to hold you and have you tell me that everything would be okay. I felt so alone…Bobby had Pam and I couldn't talk to momma…I wanted you" JR said "I remember the morning that we left I asked you to stay but when we returned you had gone"

"I had to go sweetheart…I knew that if you came back without Jock you would be vulnerable and I couldn't walk away from you like that…so I decided it was best that I left" Sue Ellen said "I remember you turning up drunk one day at my house and warning me that I wouldn't have a minute's rest until you had John Ross back at southfork…..part of me was scared but another part of me wanted to reach out to you"

JR pulled her closer to him and kissed her "You're the only woman I want; noone understands me the way you do" he said "Whenever I was down I wanted you; whenever the rest of the world hated me I knew I could count on you to be there"

"Always" she said smiling

"Hmmmm, we still haven't solved the mystery though" JR said

"What's that?" Sue Ellen asked

"Who put that damn watch on Bobby's grave and why" JR replied

"Are you going to ask Miss Ellie?" Sue Ellen said

JR looked at the watch "No not at the moment, I don't think she did this and I don't want to cause her any pain by showing her the watch" he said

"Hey it's getting late why don't we go back inside?" Sue Ellen said

JR stood up and stretched out his arms for her; Sue Ellen took hold of his hands and he pulled her up. JR then wrapped his arm around her waist, seeing that the watch box was still on the ground he picked it up. Sue Ellen looked at him wondering what he was going to do. Letting go off Sue Ellen he placed the watch in his pocket then walked over to Bobby's grave and placed the box down.

"Can't walk into the house with the box but I'll put the watch in my pocket" he said "At least it will be safe there"

Arm in arm they walked back to the house.

Ben Stivers stood by the barn watching the couple approach the house. He knew where they had been and presumed that they had found the watch. He glanced around Southfork; the ranch had always been peaceful at night; this was the best time to be outside; all that could be heard was the sound of the wind gently swaying the trees. He thought about a Southfork of long ago; things had changed but this place still held a sense of peace for him. Ben took a picture out of his pocket and stared down at the face of his family; lost to him forever it seemed but maybe there was something he could do to put right the past. He watched the couple closely and saw how happy they were; holding each other close; laughing and joking. As they walked into the house he turned and went back to his lodgings; sitting on the bed he reached below it and pulled out some belongings. He picked up a penknife; touching the blade he was careful not to cut himself. Soon it would be time he thought.

Sue Ellen and JR walked into the den. Miss Ellie looked up at them.

"Where have you two been?" She asked

"We went for a walk by the treehouse" Sue Ellen said "It really is a beautiful night out there"

"Yeah" JR said

"Would you like a coffee" Miss Ellie asked

"No thanks Momma, we're going to check on John Ross then we're going to bed..Goodnight" JR replied

"Goodnight" Miss Ellie and Clayton replied

JR and Sue Ellen walked hand in hand upstairs; Miss Ellie and Clayton watched them go.

"They look so happy" Clayton said "I don't know if I've ever seen Sue Ellen looking so radiant"

"I just hope it lasts" Miss Ellie said "Especially with the new baby"

"So do I" Clayton said "Sue Ellen's come so far I would hate to see her suffer a setback because of JR"

"I think JR is finally ready to settle down; I think he's finally realized what he has in Sue Ellen"

JR and Sue Ellen gently opened the door of John Ross' room. They smiled to see that their son had thrown of his comforter and had managed to turn himself around so that his head was at the foot of the bed. He also had his headphones on.

"What am I going to do with that child" Sue Ellen laughed

JR quietly tiptoed to the bed and trying not to wake his son he lifted him and put him back into the bed; pulling the comforter up around him. Gently he removed the headphones and kissed his head. Sue Ellen watched; wishing that others could see this side of JR; the loving father who would do anything for his son. She walked up to him and gently kissed his cheek before turning to her son and kissing him. They watched their son for a minute then turned and quietly walked out.

When they entered their room JR took Sue Ellen in his arms.

"Hey we did something right" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "Make that two things" she smiled as she took JR's hand and placed it on her stomach.

"I can't wait for this baby" JR said

"You're going to have to" Sue Ellen said "At least for another seven months"

JR was quiet; Sue Ellen looked at him.

"You are a brilliant father JR; John Ross worships you and I know how much you love him" she said

JR took the watch out of his pocket and looked at it.

"I worshipped my daddy, but I don't think he knew that; I can't ever remember him telling me he loved me or momma for that matter. Was I that unlovable" JR said

Sue Ellen hugged him "They loved you JR but some people can't express their feelings very well" She said

"John Ross knows that I love him, doesn't he" JR asked

"You tell him often enough" Sue Ellen said she watched him playing with the watch "What are you going to do with that"

"I don't know" JR said "Maybe just hide it away in a drawer"

**Ben Stivers room**

Ben lay on the bed staring at the celling. He was alone in the world; everything he had once held dear in the world was gone forever; all he had left was memories, some good, and some bad. Tomorrow was another day which he would spend working on the ranch; he felt too old for this but there were things he needed to do.

**Sue Ellen and JR's room**

Sue Ellen woke up early and lay watching a sleeping JR; he looked so peaceful, she smiled as she noticed that his top teeth were biting down on his bottom lips as though he was deep in thought, just the way John Ross did when he slept. Gently she stroked his cheek. Finally she felt that her dreams were coming true; everything she ever wanted was now hers and hers alone. She loved JR more than anyone could ever imagine; even when things had been really bad between them she still loved him and knew that she always would. After a while JR opened his eyes and smiled at her.

"Hey….watching me sleep?" He asked

"You just looked so peaceful…..so perfect lying there" she said

"How are you feeling?" He asked

"I'm fine" she smiled

"What no morning sickness?" he said

"No but I'm hungry" she said

JR looked at her

"For you!" she said

Sue Ellen cuddled up closer and kissed him, JR wrapped his arms tightly around her.

"mmmm." He said "We should get up!"

Sue Ellen threw the comforter of them and began kissing her way down JR's body; reaching JR's chest she took one of his nipples in her mouth and began sucking on it; JR closed his eyes.

"You sure you want to get up, JR?" she asked

"Keep going and I'll let you know in a minute" he replied

Sue Ellen laughed; then moved her attention to his other nipple, meanwhile her hand traced its way to JR's manhood, she then began to stroke it. JR sighed delighting in the sensation he was getting. God, he loved this woman and life was just getting better and better. JR closed his eyes as Sue Ellen worked her magic on him; suddenly he pulled her closer to him, kissing her passionately; Sue Ellen wrapped her legs around him as he entered her; finding their rhythm they began to make love; first tenderly then more urgently as both of them reached the point of no return; finally they lay wrapped in each others arms.

"You are incredible" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "I love you, God, I love you so much" she said

JR looked at her "Do you know I think you're the only person who has ever said that to me and meant it" he said "I don't think I've ever heard momma or daddy say that to me"

Sue Ellen held him tightly "JR; like I told you last night some people just don't feel comfortable with expressing their feelings; I supposed Jock and Miss Ellie should thought that you knew that they loved you" she said

"But Sue Ellen..they didn't not the way they loved Bobby and Gary" JR said "After Bobby was born I realized that all I was to daddy was his business partner; he never played with me the way he played with Bobby or I play with John Ross. Daddy would never have played in the pool with me like I did with John Ross yesterday; he was my hero, I worshipped him but I was never good enough and I just don't know why"

Sue Ellen remained silent letting JR talk.

"I guess the reason daddy's death hit me more than Bobby was that Bobby always knew that daddy loved him; he didn't have to prove himself whereas I did, I will never know if he was proud of me or not; I will never know if he ever truly loved me" JR said "Bobby was upset by daddy's death but it didn't destroy him like it nearly destroyed me; I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't of had John Ross"

Sue Ellen kissed him; she realized that finding the watch last night had awakened feelings inside him which he'd kept hidden for years. She made a silent vow to herself that never again would JR ever feel unloved; if she had to tell him a million times a day that she loved him she would.

"Sue Ellen I look at John Ross now and I know what daddy would be thinking; he would expect me to train him up to be the next generation in Ewing Oil; but he's six years old and I don't want him growing up thinking he's my business partner; first and most importantly he's my son and I love him" JR said "Maybe in ten, twelve years I will take him into Ewing Oil but not yet"

Sue Ellen looked at him. JR had always kept his feelings in control; always given the impression that he was a hard man in total control of himself; but she knew he wasn't; there was a side to JR that was desperately in need of being loved; she could see it in his eyes.

"Sweetheart I can't tell you what Jock and Miss Ellie felt but it's in the past, try and let go off it. You have a family who loved you so much" she said; she looked deep into his eyes "JR you have a wife that will do anything for you"

"I think I've finally realized that" JR said "For so many years I convinced myself that I didn't need anyone; that the most important thing to me was power; if I had power I had everything…..love was alien to me,I didn't understand it; how could anyone leave themselves vulnerable to another person"

"Loving someone doesn't mean you have to be vulnerable to them; if someone loves you then there is nothing they wouldn't do for you….open your heart and let me in JR and I'll show you the difference between love and power" she said

JR smiled and kissed her "Is that a promise?"

"Definitely Mr Ewing" she replied "Finding that watch has brought out some difficult memories for you hasn't it"

"It's just daddy died without me knowing whether he truly loved me or not; I never told him I loved him; not the way John Ross tells me. I don't remember him reading me bedtime stories or anything like that but I know he did with Bobby" he said "There were times when I wanted to tell him I loved him but I was scared….scared that he would just laugh it off"

Sue Ellen held him tighter and kissed him "Listen, this is in the past and unfortunately the past is something that we can't change; but we can learn from it and move on. The one thing you should never doubt is that I love you; John Ross loves you and this baby is going to love you, that is all that matters." she said "And now I think it's time we got up"

After taking a shower the couple walked hand in hand downstairs and out onto the patio where there son was having breakfast with Clayton and Miss Ellie. Sue Ellen walked over and kissed John Ross.

"You're up late" John Ross said "We started breakfast ages ago"

JR laughed "Yes well you momma and I had things we needed to discuss" he said

"So what are your plans for today?" Miss Ellie asked

"Well first we've got to get our son to school, then we're going shopping…I'm taking a few days off work just to recover" Sue Ellen said

"And you think going shopping is aiding your recovery" Miss Ellie laughed

"Of course, but JR wants to go into the office this afternoon so I'm going to spend some time relaxing here" she replied

"I was thinking of going up to the grave this afternoon, would you like to join me" Miss Ellie said "Clayton going to be working with Ben and I wouldn't mind the company"

"Of course" Sue Ellen said

The family chatted over breakfast then Sue Ellen and JR got ready to take John Ross to school and go shopping. After dropping John Ross at school they made their way to the shopping mall. Sue Ellen enjoyed herself; she even smiled at the thought that JR was enjoying himself too. Hand in hand they walked through baby shops discussing color schemes for the nursery and picking out new furniture. At one o'clock they decided to get some lunch. Sitting in the restaurant JR looked at the bags that Sue Ellen had accumulated during the shopping trip and smiled.

"I thought we were looking for things for the nursery" JR laughed "Not clothes"

"Hey what am I supposed to do in a few months time when none of my clothes fit me" she replied "Walk around with nothing on!"

"Mmmm" JR said thinking "Interesting thought"

"JR!" she said "Are you serious about decorating the nursery ourselves; I mean neither of us have had much practice"

"I know but think of all the fun we can have and all the hot showers we can take together when we get covered in paint" he smiled

"There had to be an ulterior motive didn't there?" she laughed

"You sure the wallpaper is okay?" JR asked "We can change it if you want"

"No, I told you I wanted Winnie the Pooh and the picture is just perfect. Winnie the Pooh; Tigger and Eyeore sitting near the treehouse with a rainbow overhead" Sue Ellen said

"Always the romantic" JR said

"There's always a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow; and I remember when I was little the first thing I did when I saw a rainbow was make a wish" she replied

JR laughed "Maybe we can find one of those baby mobiles that play 'somewhere over the rainbow'" he said

"No, however a 'Winnie the pooh' mobile would be perfect playing a nice soothing lullaby" she said

"You've got it all planned haven't you" He said

"This time is going to be so different; through our own stupidity we missed out on the excitement of planning for a new baby last time but this time we can make up for that and John Ross can be involved too" she said

"I would love to turn the clock back and correct those times; I'm so scared of John Ross feeling the way I did when I was growing up" JR said

Sue Ellen reached for his hand and squeezed it "Don't worry; have a little faith in yourself I know you won't let him feel like he's second best" she said "We both love him too much for that"

"Hey did you see those baby clothes; they're so tiny" he said

Sue Ellen laughed enjoying how much interest JR was taking "Well babies are tiny" she said

"I remember seeing John Ross after he was born; now that was tiny" JR said

"He was two months premature" Sue Ellen said "But he soon gained weight; just like you he was greedy"

"So when do we need to start buying baby clothes" JR said

"Not for a while yet" Sue Ellen replied

They continued enjoying their lunch and each other's company.

**Southfork**

Ben Stivers walked alone through the pastures of Southfork. Clayton had gone back to the house for lunch with Miss Ellie and although he had invited Ben to join him, Ben had declined the offer. Finding his favorite spot he sat down for a moment and relaxed; he reached into his pocket and took out a photograph…it was an old black and white photograph of a time long ago…a time when he had been happy. Closing his eyes he sat thinking about his life; his thoughts turned to the time he had spent in South America and what had happened down there. Reluctantly he looked at his watch realizing that it was time for him to go back to work.

JR drove Sue Ellen back to Southfork after their lunch, there were a few things he wanted to do in the office and he told her that he'd pick up John Ross on his way home. Sue Ellen kissed him reminding him that she loved him before getting out of the car. She then turned and met Clayton and Miss Ellie on the patio.

"Hey" she said "How are you two"

"Fine" Miss Ellie said

"How did the shopping go?" Clayton asked

"Well between you and me, I think JR enjoyed himself" she replied "I'm just going to take these things upstairs and get changed"

Twenty minutes later Sue Ellen walked outside to find Miss Ellie sitting in one of the sunchairs.

"All alone" she said

"Clayton and Ben have gone back to work" Miss Ellie replied "I just hope Clayton's not overdoing things"

"Are you ready to go up to the grave?" Sue Ellen asked

"Yes, just let me get the flowers I've picked" she said

The two women walked through the pastures; talking about Sue Ellen's shopping trip and their hopes for the new baby. On reaching the grave Miss Ellie knelt down at the grave and began placing the flowers into the vase which was on the grave when something caught her eye. She picked the object up.

"What is it Miss Ellie" Sue Ellen asked

"It's an old black and white photograph" Miss Ellie said handing it to Sue Ellen while she continued with the flowers. Finally when she had finished she went and sat with Sue Ellen beneath the treehouse.

"It's an old picture of Southfork" Sue Ellen said "With you and Jock"

"Yes a very old picture" Miss Ellie replied "It was possibly taken sometime during the late 30's or early 40's when my daddy was alive"

"Tell me about the old Southfork" Sue Ellen said

"You don't want to hear about that" Miss Ellie laughed

"I do" Sue Ellen said

"Well I think this must have been taken in the late 30's" Miss Ellie began "And you're wrong, that's not Jock that's Digger"

"Cliff's father" Sue Ellen asked

"Yes; we were involved back then, Digger was partner with Jock in a quest to build the greatest oil company in the world" Miss Ellie said

"What was Digger like?" Sue Ellen asked

"The opposite of Jock; Jock was a hard man but Digger wasn't; he was a warm gentle man" Miss Ellie said "But he had his faults"

"Like what" Sue Ellen said

"Digger was brilliant at finding oil whereas Jock knew how to build the business up; the trouble was once Digger had seen the oil strike he would get over excited and want to celebrate which meant going around every bar in Dallas drinking himself into oblivion; but he called it celebrating" Miss Ellie said

"What happened between you two?" Sue Ellen asked "If you don't mind me asking"

"No" Miss Ellie replied "It was a long time ago but I remember quite clearly the day I broke up with him. He had called at Southfork early in the morning and told me that he and Jock were going down to see an oil strike. I had something I needed to discuss with him and he promised he would be back by 7pm at the latest. I wanted it to be a special night so I spent ages cooking his favorite meal and making the table look nice; then I sat and waited for him to arrive. Needless to say 7pm came and went, so did 9pm and finally at 10pm I gave up hoping that he would show. He knew that I wanted to talk to him about something but once they got that oil strike I was the last thing on his mind so at that moment I knew we were doomed; I couldn't rely on him and I knew that if I stayed with him…..we would have lost Southfork…any money that he and Jock made, Digger would have wasted it on drink. That night I cried myself to sleep. Digger turned up at noon that day and I told him it was over between us"

"Where does Jock fit in" Sue Ellen asked

"Well Jock was interested in me, he had called round a few times bringing a drunk Digger home; a number of times he told me I could do better. Anyway after telling Digger that things were over I went to the old offices of Ewing Oil; knowing that Jock would be alone; Digger would be busy at one of the bars. I remember thinking that what I was doing was the right thing for my……………for my family for Southfork; that night I asked Jock to dinner and he accepted…he stayed the night and a month later we were married" Miss Ellie replied

"Did you love him?" Sue Ellen asked

"No; at the time I loved Digger but I knew he was no good for me" Miss Ellie said "But I grew to love Jock; not in the way that I loved Digger but Jock was strong and fiercely protective of his family" she said "And I knew that with him, the future would be secure"

"The Barnes-Ewing isn't just about oil is it" Sue Ellen said

Miss Ellie looked at her and smiled "No, Digger always felt that Jock stole everything that was his including his girl" she replied "This feud has gone on for too long and destroyed so many people including Digger…I wish it could stop…but with JR and Cliff I don't think it ever will"

"Maybe in the next generation it will" Sue Ellen said

"Perhaps with the new baby and JR having total control of Ewing Oil things will be different" Miss Ellie said

"JR is changing" Sue Ellen said "I know I've said it hundreds of times but this time is different; he's starting to open up to me in a way he's never done before. These past few months' things have been so good between us"

"I noticed how much time you spend out here" Miss Ellie said

"This has always been our favourite spot" Sue Ellen said "The treehouse holds special memories for us; we were talking last night and JR said that although Jock built the treehoouse for Bobby, JR had better memories of the place"

"Do you ever regret remarrying him" Miss Ellie asked

Sue Ellen sighed "There has been occasions when I wished I hadn't" she said "However I love your son with all of my heart and I know that there is noone I'd rather be with. I fell in love with him from the moment I saw him and even through the bad times I never stopped loving him. Momma didn't want me to marry him the first time; she had someone else in mind for me"

"Who?" Miss Ellie asked

"Billy Frampton…his daddy was richer than Jock so despite what everyone thought I married JR because I loved him not his money" Sue Ellen said

"I know you did!" Miss Ellie said "But money was important to you"

"I was brought up by a mother who put money above everything else; she didn't have much so she wanted her daughters to have what she didn't; she tried to brainwash us into thinking that money was everything that love didn't matter as long as we had rich husbands…..but I didn't want that" Sue Ellen said "I remember the early years of our first marriage I desperately wanted him to love me but for some reason he couldn't"

"I remember one night shortly before he put you in the sanitarium before John Ross was born; Bobby and Pam brought you home after you passed out on the roadside, Jock was furious but I told him to let me speak to JR. I remember asking JR who did he loved and he told me he loved you" Miss Ellie said "Maybe I let go of him too soon; maybe if I hadn't allowed Jock to take him into Ewing Oil at such a young age he would have been different"

Sue Ellen was silent; thinking about her earlier conversation with JR and his feelings at never knowing whether either of his parents loved him.

"Miss Ellie I told JR last night we can't change the past but we can move on into the future; and I'm planning on building a warm, loving secure future for JR, our children and me" Sue Ellen said

"So is JR still taking you on holiday" Miss Ellie asked

"Yes" Sue Ellen said "But it will be in a couple of weeks when John Ross is on holiday"

"And you're still planning on renewing your wedding vows" Miss Ellie said

"Absolutely" Sue Ellen smiled "This time JR is mine and only mine; I'm going to give him so much love that he wont need to look elsewhere"

Miss Ellie smiled "We should get back, JR and John Ross should be back soon"

"Okay" Sue Ellen said "What are you going to do with the picture"

"Don't know" Miss Ellie replied "I wonder who put it there"

Sue Ellen wondered the same; first the watch now the photograph. Who was doing this and why? She decided to talk to JR later.

Sue Ellen and Miss Ellie walked back towards the house, on reaching the patio they saw JR and John Ross sitting at the patio table. Sue Ellen walked up to her son and kissed him.

"Hi sweetheart; how was school?" she said

"Okay….but I still want to finish school and work with daddy" he replied

"John Ross…we've talked about that…you're still too young to work with me" JR said

"But daddy……grandpa let you work with him when you were my age" John Ross said

JR looked at Sue Ellen "Daddy's right" Sue Ellen said "But that doesn't mean you can't go on field trips with him, during the holidays"

"So what are you two up to?" Miss Ellie asked

"Homework" John Ross said "Daddy's helping me with a project then we're going for a swim before dinner"

"Okay, we're leave you too it" Sue Ellen said, as she walked past JR's chairs she wrapped her arms around him and kissed his cheek. "See you later" she whispered in his ear.

An hour later JR walked upstairs to find her lying on their bed.

"Hey, are you okay?" he asked

Sue Ellen stretched out her arms for him and he went over and sat down beside her. "I am now" she said

"John Ross is getting changed into his swimming trunks and I'm supposed to be doing the same; however just at this moment there's something else I'd rather do!" he said

Sue Ellen laughed "I wonder what that could be" she said

JR got up from the bed and went to find his trunks; Sue Ellen went towards him.

"Need any help" she asked as she put her arms around his waist.

"I would love some; however our son is waiting for me and I know if I let you anywhere near my body at this moment I want be able to leave this room for at least the next hour" JR said

"Spoilsport" Sue Ellen said

"However I'll take a raincheck" JR said

Just at that moment there was a knock on the door.

"Daddy are you ready" John Ross asked

Sue Ellen smiled "Your son wants you" she said

JR opened the door "Okay son; let's go" he said

Sue Ellen went out and sat on the balcony; watching her two favorite men in the pool. She loved watching them play. John Ross brought out the best in JR; she knew how much he loved his son. She thought back to their conversation earlier that morning and how he had felt about his own parents; not knowing if either of them truly loved him. He desperately needed his father's approval but he never got it. She wondered whether Jock ever realized just how his son felt about him and whether JR would have been any different if he had been shown affection as a child. The one thing she was sure of was that JR would never let John Ross feel second best; she knew this baby wouldn't change anything between JR and his son. An hour later JR returned to their room.

"Hey darlin'" he said "It's time to get ready for dinner"

On hearing his voice Sue Ellen came inside, smiling she walked up to him and kissed him.

"What was that for?" He asked

"For being the best husband and best father" she replied "I was watching you playing with our son"

"He's still not happy with me because I wont let him leave school" JR said

"He'll get over that" Sue Ellen said "Beside you're not the only one who wont let him leave"

"I promised him I would take him on a field trip when he's on holiday; maybe you could join us and we can take Christopher" JR said

"That reminds me I'm having lunch with Pam tomorrow" she said "I haven't seen her much lately"

JR groaned "You're leaving me on my own for her" he said

"You said you were going into the office, how about I meet you there later" Sue Ellen said

"Okay…by the way how was your afternoon" JR said

"It was fine….Miss Ellie and I had a long chat" Sue Ellen said

"What about?" JR asked

"JR something strange is going on" Sue Ellen started "There was an old picture placed on Bobby's grave this afternoon"

"An old picture……" JR said

"Yes…it was of Southfork and Miss Ellie with Digger Barnes" Sue Ellen replied

"Hell…that is an old picture….I mean momma and Digger that was years ago" JR said "Thank God she married daddy and not him…can't imagine what life would have been like growing up as a Barnes"

Sue Ellen laughed "You'd have been fighting with the Ewings" she said "Mind you I don't think there would have been a Barnes-Ewing feud"

"Digger couldn't take the fact that my daddy was the better oilman" JR said

"He also didn't like the fact that your daddy stole Miss Ellie from him" Sue Ellen said

JR stayed silent "History nearly repeated itself; Cliff almost managed to take you from me" he said

"JR…..I only went to Cliff because you were always too busy with your girlfriends" she said "I don't think anyone could steal me away from you….I love you too much"

"I remember the day I found out about your affair with Cliff; I'd been having you followed and when the detective came back with the name of the man you were seeing I was horrified; of all the men you could of gone to, why him?" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at him "Partly to get back at you but after a while….he was just so nice….so gentle and I needed that" she said "JR, you and I were so distant back then"

"Was he better in bed than me?" JR asked

Sue Ellen blushed "JR!" she said "That doesn't even warrant a reply"

JR laughed "Hey I was thinking a while back; Barnes and I seem to have the same taste in women; you; Afton and Mandy….not to mention Julie" he said "Bit worrying that…I mean we can't agree on anything except for women"

"Yes well…just make sure there's only one woman in your life from now on" Sue Ellen said "I don't want to share you with anyone"

JR kissed her "I guarantee that there will never be anyone else in my life" he said

"Do you think we should tell Miss Ellie about the watch?" Sue Ellen asked "I mean something very strange is happening"

"Maybe it's just a coincidence" JR said

"Well someone's put them there, they didn't get there by themselves" Sue Ellen said.

**The Treehouse**

Ben Stivers sat on the grass beneath the treehouse. He looked at Bobby's grave; knowing that the watch and photograph had been discovered. He wondered how the family would react; eventually he knew he would have to make a move. His thoughts returned to South America and the plane crash. Four years had passed but still his memory of that day was as clear as anything. Looking around Southfork he felt like he had come home; this place held good memories for him however he had work to do.

**Southfork**

Sue Ellen and JR sat alone in the living room, they had just put John Ross to bed and Miss Ellie and Clayton had gone out for the evening. They lay cuddled up on the sofa.

"We should do this more often" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at him and kissed him "I love being alone with you"

"We should get momma and Clayton to go out more often; that way when John Ross is in bed we've got the whole house to ourselves; to do whatever we want" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "And I know what you want to do" she said

JR smiled "I was thinking about that photograph you found" he said "It seems strange that someone would put a photograph of momma and that Barnes on the grave, then there's the watch. I was going to ask momma about it but I figure that whoever put the photo there also put the watch there. Someone wants us to find them"

"That's what I figure too" Sue Ellen said "I mean they were put there to be found"

"I was thinking about daddy this afternoon…how he trained me up to run Ewing Oil" JR said "Oh hell, I'm boring you with this subject"

Sue Ellen shook her head "No talk to me I'm listening" she said looking into his eyes

"Well, I was five years old when daddy first took me to Ewing Oil; I felt like his business partner…he showed me all the things he did" JR said

"You did the same with John Ross" Sue Ellen said

"No; it's not the same as John Ross. I remember taking him into Ewing Oil when he was tiny just to show him around; we sat and spun around in my chair about 100 times" JR said "He loved being spun around like that; then I got some paper out of my drawer and we drew pictures for a while..correction... he scribbled"

Sue Ellen looked deeply into his eyes wondering what was going on behind them.

"From the moment daddy took me to Ewing oil; things changed. Everyday after I finished school I would go to Ewing Oil and daddy would teach me more about building an empire" JR said "I look at John Ross and realize how different our relationship is; for a start when I picked John Ross up from school today we both got changed and then I helped him with his homework; something my father never did for me; then later we played in the pool. Sue Ellen I can't ever remember doing any of that with my father or momma for that matter. I remember…being eight years old…Garry was four; it was his birthday and he was having a party with some of his friends. They were going to the movies and I wanted to join them; but daddy said I couldn't, there was work to do..so I missed out on the party. Another time I remember I was out riding with daddy and one of the ranch hands; for some reason the horse I was riding got scared..I don't know what happened but I was thrown from it. I was ten years old and I hurt myself pretty bad. Daddy just told me to grow up and then went after the horse"

Sue Ellen kissed him and held him tighter.

"Momma just let him do what he wanted" JR said "She never once told him he was being too hard on me and yet if it was her precious Garry he was telling off; she immediately go to protect him" JR said "All my life it seems I've had to fight for my parent's affections with my brothers but I never got it"

"JR do you know how much your son adores you" Sue Ellen said "He always has….he wanted to stay with you after the last custody hearing; he only wants to go into Ewing Oil so he can be near you; I guarantee he doesn't want to do any work"

JR laughed "I know; today he asked if I would help him with his homework however I think I did more than him"

"And you know something else?" Sue Ellen asked

"What" he replied

"I love you more than you will ever know; and if I have to tell you that a million times a day I will. The more we talk about your relationship with your parents the more I understand you. You are and have always been my number one; from the moment I first set eyes on you I fell in love with you; and no matter what you did to me I still loved you. I know in the beginning your family always believed I married you because of the money; and I admit that I've been brought up by a mother who put money before everything else; but I swear that is not the reason I married you. From this moment on I want us to share everything and that means everything; if you want to talk about your feeling about your parents, I'm here to listen; if you want to talk about Ewing Oil, I'm here or if you just want to sit in silence then I will do that. You are not alone" Sue Ellen said

JR smiled "By the way have you been in touch with your mother lately" he asked

"No; she's off on one of her cruises, I don't really think she's happy with me for leaving her to come back here" Sue Ellen replied "She doesn't even know she's going to be a grandmother again"

"I guess your childhood wasn't exactly perfect either" JR said

"No" Sue Ellen replied "It got worse after daddy died; I hated the beauty contests but momma insisted I did them; her quest was to marry me off to a rich man"

"Billy Frampton" JR laughed

"Exactly; she was horrified when I said I wanted to marry you" Sue Ellen replied "She didn't speak to me for about a week"

"That must have been peaceful" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "I remember when I left you while I was pregnant with John Ross. I had enough of you cheating on me and not being discreet about it. I went to momma's with my suitcase. I asked her what she thought about me turning up there with two suitcases and she told me that they were two suitcases that someone married to a rich man would have. I told her why I was leaving you but she couldn't understand; she just told me some men were like that and I'd should just put up with it. She couldn't bear the thought of me giving up being Mrs JR Ewing. The worse thing was that Kristin agreed with her. I think at that point I realized she'd done a good job on my baby sister"

"I know which sister I prefer" JR said

"I never tried to shoot you" Sue Ellen said

"True" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at JR "Okay let's make a pact; from this moment on we look after each other; if either of us have a problem we share it; everyday we show our son how much we love him and then when this baby comes we spoil both of them. The only thing I want from you JR is your love and that is the one thing I will give you…..unconditional love. By being honest and open with each other we can create a bond between us and noone will ever be able to hurt us again" she said "The only thing that truly matters is us and our children"

"Okay" JR said "I wished I realized sooner how easy you are to talk to; you just listen….you don't interrupt or judge me"

"I'll tell you something else you could do for me" Sue Ellen said

"What's that?" JR asked

Sue Ellen looked at him "Try and end this feud with Cliff" she replied

JR looked at her "You're joking" he said

"Sweetheart….do we really have to have this feud going into the next generation" Sue Ellen said "This argument was between Jock and Digger; neither of them should have brought their children into it. I really would love my children to grow up not knowing about this feud"

"I don't know…it takes two darlin'" JR said

"I'll speak to Pam tomorrow" she said "But will you try"

"Okay" JR sighed

"Thankyou" she said "That's all I ask"

JR held her tightly "You never did answer my question about Cliff" he said

"What was that?" she asked

"Is he better in bed than me" he whispered in her ear.

"Mmmmm" Sue Ellen said "That's a tough one…….however"

She kissed him passionately on the lips "I think the answer to that is" she said

"What" JR asked

"The only man who ever really turned me on was you" she laughed

"I think it's time we went to bed" JR said "Come on"

Hand in hand they walked upstairs to their room. Sue Ellen loved the way JR was finally opening up to her. She wanted him to tell her about his childhood, she knew that he had bottled up his feelings for most of his life but she wanted him to tell her everything. She wanted to be there for him and give him the love that he had been denied.

**Southfork the following morning**

Miss Ellie sat alone on the patio; Sue Ellen and JR had left a few hours ago. She knew that JR was going into work and Sue Ellen had a doctor's appointment followed by lunch with Pam. She hated the ranch being this quiet so she decided to take a stroll and try to find Clayton. Not quite knowing why she walked over to Ben's lodgings. Something troubled her about him but she didn't know what. He was always pleasant to her but there was something familiar about him. She saw the door to Ben's room opened; first she knocked then walked in. Looking around she saw that the place was reasonably tidy; she noticed what looked like letters on the bed, seeing that noone was around she wandered over to the bed and picked up the paper. Reading the letter she turned cold as she recognized the writing and the words.

**A Restaurant in Dallas**

Sue Ellen and Pam sat in the restaurant waiting for their meal to arrive.

"So how are you?" Pam asked

"I'm fine….a bit tired but I guess that's only to be expected" Sue Ellen replied

"I can't believe what happened……Angelica Nero…you must have been so scared" Pam said

"I was…..she told me that JR had a choice….either me or Ewing Oil" Sue Ellen said "If JR had chosen Ewing Oil I have no doubt she would have killed me"

"I'm surprised JR didn't choose Ewing Oil….but then again he'd never really let anyone have his precious company" Pam said

"Pam……JR and I are trying for a new start. We have John Ross and the new baby to look forward to and I know he's trying to change. He's starting to open up to me in a way that he never has before and I'm beginning to understand him more." Sue Ellen said

"Mmmm" Pam said

Sue Ellen smiled at her "I know, how many times in my life have I put my faith in JR only to be proved wrong. But this time things are really different….I'm not the same person I was back then………I've changed and JR knew if he wanted me back he would have to change too" she said "This time our relationship is going to last…I'm going to prove to him that the only woman he will ever need is me"

"Are you still going to work after you've had the baby?" Pam asked

The waiter arrived with their meal which he set down on the table before them. Asking if they required anything else he told them to enjoy their meal and left.

Sue Ellen looked at Pam "I am so hungry….I don't remember being this hungry when I was pregnant with John Ross" she said "To answer your question…yes I still want to be involved in Graison's research; maybe work part time or even work from Southfork…if Mark still wants me"

"He can't wait to have you back at work" Pam said "You're the best PR he's ever had; noone seems to be able to make people part with their money like you"

"Yes and to think I used to have the reputation of being able to spend money like it was going out of fashion" Sue Ellen laughed.

"So how does it feel to be pregnant again" Pam asked

Sue Ellen laughed "To be honest it feels great; John Ross is looking forward to having a new baby brother or sister…and JR……I've never seen him so excited" she said "We went shopping yesterday for wallpaper and paint and ended up also looking for baby clothes. This time things are going to be so different; I know he'll be with me every step of the way; we're even going to decorate the nursery together"

"So how are things at Southfork?" Pam asked

"You should come by more often" Sue Ellen said "Miss Ellie and Clayton are fine however there's something strange going on"

"What do you mean?" Pam asked

"Well the other night JR and I were talking by the treehouse when we noticed a strange box of Bobby's grave; he opened it up and inside was Jock's watch. JR's convinced that he had it with him when he died" she said "Not only that I went with Miss Ellie up to the grave yesterday afternoon to put some flowers there and on it was an old picture of Southfork"

"That is strange…what does Miss Ellie think?" Pam asked

"We haven't told her about the watch; JR doesn't want to upset her but I think she found the picture a bit strange" Sue Ellen replied "Not only that the picture was of Miss Ellie and your daddy with Southfork in the background"

"Miss Ellie and Digger…God…that has to be an old picture" Pam said

"She told me a bit about her and Digger" Sue Ellen said "I got the impression that she loved him very much….even after she went to Jock"

"Daddy never got over her" Pam said

"I can understand your daddy's viewpoint…it must have seemed like Jock took away everything from him…Miss Ellie...Ewing Oil" Sue Ellen said

"I remember when Cliff told Digger about him being the father of John Ross; daddy was so happy….I think he finally felt that he could take something away from Jock" Pam said

"Cliff shouldn't have told him that" Sue Ellen said

"I know but after I lost my second baby; I think Cliff just felt sorry for daddy and wanted him to know that he had a grandchild" Pam said

"Pam…..I'm going to be really honest with you. From the moment I saw John Ross I knew who his father was and I knew it wasn't Cliff" Sue Ellen said "John Ross has JR's eyes…I mean at the time I didn't care who his father was but deep down I knew he was a Ewing"

"I hated the way Jock called Cliff a liar" Pam said "It seemed once again that the Barnes had lost to the mighty Ewings"

Sue Ellen was silent lost in her own thoughts; to be truthful there were things she didn't like about Jock; mainly his treatment of JR over the years. No wonder why JR behaved the way he did; all he ever wanted was his father's love but he had been denied that.

"I was talking to JR last night…..what do you think about trying to bury the Barnes-Ewing feud" Sue Ellen said

"I wish it could have ended the day I married Bobby; maybe then we would have had a chance." Pam said

"If I can get JR to agree to it….can you talk to Cliff." Sue Ellen asked "I really don't want this going into the next generation. This was Digger's and Jock's feud not Cliff and JR's"

"Okay, I'll try and talk to my brother but you know what he's like" Pam replied

"I think I can persuade JR that he has more important things to worry about!" Sue Ellen said.

"Are you still planning on going on holiday?" Pam asked

"Yes and we would love Christopher to come; John Ross would like that too" Sue Ellen said "We're not going until school is finished. It would just be nice to spend some quality time together away from Southfork"

"You sure you wouldn't like Mark and me to look after John Ross for you, then you can have some time alone" Pam asked

"No, we want a family holiday and that includes our son" Sue Ellen said "Beside I love watching JR and John Ross together"

"Okay I'm sure Christopher would love to go" Pam said

"I've got to go and meet JR and then we have to pick up John Ross, how about we pick up Christopher and take them to the park for a while" Sue Ellen said "Then we can bring Christopher home after dinner"

Pam smiled "Sure" she said "It will give Mark and me time to ourselves"

"By the way I'm paying" Sue Ellen said as the bill came.

Sue Ellen and Pam walked to their cars and said their goodbyes.

Sue Ellen drove to the Ewing Building and parked outside. She then walked into the building and took the elevator up to JR's office. His secretary informed her that he was on the phone so she knocked on his door and gently opened it. Seeing her JR's face lit up and he motioned for her to go in and take a chair. JR finished his phone call then went around his desk to her. Taking her hand he pulled her up and kissed her.

"So have you missed me?" she asked

"Like crazy" JR said "God…I don't know what's wrong with me….I've been sitting here trying to work and all the time I was wishing that I was with you"

Sue Ellen laughed "Looks like the great JR Ewing has fallen in love" she said

JR held her tightly breathing in the smell of her perfume "You could be right" He said "You wouldn't like to come and be my PR, just think of all the fun we could have; meetings in the boardroom; I could dictate letters to you while you sit on my lap"

"Tempting offer Mr Ewing" she laughed "But you forget I already have a job"

JR was silent for a moment "I…..I had a visitor this morning" He began

"Who" Sue Ellen asked

"Mandy…apparently she's out of hospital and informed me that I'm welcome at her apartment any time I want." JR said

"I thought we'd got rid of her" Sue Ellen said "Is she that desperate that she has to take another woman's man"

"Hey I informed her that I was committed to you and our children; that I love you and only you" he said "Also I've just been on to Estate office and her apartment is about to be sold….she wont have anywhere to live in Dallas then" JR said

"You are sure this is what you want" Sue Ellen said

"Hell yes" JR said "Noone has ever loved me the way you do or taken the time to listen to me. You understand me and I know I can talk to you about anything"

Sue Ellen kissed him; just at this moment she wanted him so badly.

"I love you so much" she said "Hey do you think you could tell your secretary to go home for the day"

"Why" JR said

"You're not busy are you" she started "And we have an hour before we have to collect John Ross from school and just at this moment I want you"

JR looked at her "Just at this moment?" He said "Mmmm; only this moment"

"JR stop it….okay I want you every second of the day" she said

JR let go of her "Okay I'll be right back"

He walked out of his office and informed his secretary that he was letting her have the rest of the afternoon off. Once she had gone he walked back to Sue Ellen.

"Okay where do you want to go?" He asked

"Nowhere" she said "I want you now"

JR smiled "Then you my darlin' can have what you want"

Gently he lowered her to the floor. Sue Ellen began to remove his jacket while JR attended to the buttons on her blouse. Lovingly they removed each others clothes; JR kissing every inch of Sue Ellen's body as it was exposed to him. Finally they began to make love; slowly enjoying the closeness of each other, the feel of each other. JR rolled them over so he was on top and gently stroked Sue Ellen's face.

"I love you" he said "And I never want you to forget that"

"Do you know how many years I've waited for you to say that to me and mean it" she said "You are the most important person in my life apart from my son; you're my husband, my lover, my best friend and the father of my children"

JR kissed her; Sue Ellen pulled him tighter towards her wanting to feel the closeness; once again their bodies became one. Slowly they began to relax in each others arms.

Sue Ellen kissed him "Hey what do you say we go and pick up our son and Christopher and take them to the park?" she said "Maybe we can then take them for a hamburger"

"Sue Ellen I don't think I can move" JR laughed "You've worn me out"

They lay quietly for a while' locked in an embrace. Words couldn't describe how Sue Ellen felt; her love for JR had always been strong but now she felt an overpowering sense of love for him and the need to protect him from ever being hurt by anyone ever again. She knew he had been hurt by his parent's actions. She could see it in his eyes. She was so deep in thought she didn't hear JR's question.

"Hey where are you?" He said

"What?" Sue Ellen replied

"I just asked you how your doctor's appointment went" JR said

"Oh, fine everything's okay" she said

"What about you….I mean you're in good health" JR said

"Yes, I couldn't be better" she said "Maybe next time you can come with me to the doctors"

"Sure" He said "I want to be with you every step of the way just like I promised….by the way how was lunch"

"Okay….I talked to Pam about ending the Barnes-Ewing Feud" Sue Ellen said "And she's going to talk to Cliff"

"You really are determined to end it aren't you" He said

"JR……….I don't want this affecting my children" she said "It should have died years ago…maybe when Pam married Bobby then maybe their marriage would have stood a chance"

"For you I will try but he has to meet me half way….if he insist on carrying on with it there's nothing I can do" JR said

"That's all I want you to do" she said

"Okay; let's get dressed and pick up our son" JR said

After getting dressed they walked hand in hand out of the office and down to the car. Sue Ellen let JR drive her car.

**A Dallas Park**

JR and Sue Ellen sat on a bench watching Christopher and John Ross playing.

"Those two really do enjoy each others company" JR said

"I know…Pam said that Christopher can join us on holiday" Sue Ellen said

"Okay I'm going to book a week at Disneyworld and then maybe another couple of weeks somewhere nice and hot where we can relax" JR said "Watch the children play on the beach…what do you think"

"Sounds wonderful" Sue Ellen replied "There's nothing I would sooner do than watch the children playing while laying in your arms"

JR kissed her "Well that's sorted" he said "I'll book it tomorrow"

"We could have our own beach cabin" Sue Ellen said "That way we can be a family"

"Perfect" JR replied

Sue Ellen and JR continued to watch the children play; JR snuggled up to Sue Ellen…..he now understood what it felt to be truly loved. He felt safe with her, he could tell her things that he had never told anyone and all she did was listen to him and soothe him. He had another chance with her and he wasn't going to do anything to risk this relationship. Suddenly he remembered something. Reaching into his jacket pocket he pulled out a box. Turning to Sue Ellen he said

"Hey I found this the other night"

Sue Ellen looked at him as he handed her the box "Open it" he said

She did what she was told. "I don't believe you kept this" she said

"It's the maternity ring you threw back in my face" He said "I thought that you would wear it now"

Sue Ellen smiled "Of course I will" she said

"Just for the record darlin'; the only reason I brought that ring was to try and make up for everything that happened. I was really terrified that I would lose you the night John Ross was born; I think it was the only time Bobby has ever seen me cry. I promised myself that if you survived then I would do everything I could to make you feel special even accept John Ross" he said

Sue Ellen stroked his face "I believe you…it's just that was a painful time for me…I didn't know what I was feeling….I couldn't even hold John Ross" she said "I felt unlovable"

"At that point I would have done anything for you" he said

"I'm sorry….there is so much that has happened in our lives that I regret" she said

JR pulled her closer to him "From now on no more regrets" he said "The only memories we will have are happy ones with"

"All I want is you" she said "And our children….I want our children to grow up feeling loved and knowing that they are so special"

"Hey come on let's go and join the boys on the merry go round" JR said taking her hand

Hand in hand they ran across the park to the boys. John Ross and Christopher wiggled and laughed as JR and Sue Ellen hugged and kissed them,

**Southfork**

After finding the letters Miss Ellie left Ben's room and returned back to Southfork. Over and over she had read the letters even though she knew what had been written in them. Now she didn't know what to do. Finally she decided to go back to Ben's room and put them back. She walked back to the room, noticing that the door was still how she left it; Ben hadn't returned. She walked in and placed the letters back on the bed; seeing a box nearby she curiously looked inside. She found a knife with the letter 'J' on the handle. She was so deep in thought she didn't hear Ben come in.

"Mrs Farlow what are you doing in my room" He said

Ellie dropped the knife, she picked up one of the letters which were on the bed

"Where did you get this?" she said "Also my husband's knife"

"They're mine" he said

"You're lying" she replied

"No Ellie; you wrote those letters to me in South America"

Ben Stivers walked closer towards her; Miss Ellie stepped back

"You're lying" Ellie said "Now tell me where did you get those letters"

"I told you, they're mine" He replied "You sent them to me when I was in South America"

Miss Ellie closed her eyes; she didn't want to hear this; she didn't even want to think that the man standing before her could be her husband.

"You don't think that I would know my own husband" she said "I know you can't be Jock"

"How do you know that?" Ben asked "All you know was that I went missing in South America; no body was ever found"

"Jock would never have allowed his family to think he was dead…knowing the pain that would cause" Miss Ellie said

"I had no choice" Ben replied "I couldn't let my family see me the way I was"

Miss Ellie sat down in the chair "Okay I'm listening, what happened after the plane crash"

Ben walked over to the bed and sat down "It's a long story…..I remember the plane crashing…suddenly there were flames all around me, I manage to crawl out but the flames attacked my face and body. I knew I had to get some distance from the plane so I ran into the forest. You could hear the explosion for miles around. I was out cold for a few hours then I managed to get to my feet and try to find my way out of the forest. When I reached the road I flagged down a car that was passing by. He took me to the nearest hospital. I was badly burned and bruised….I didn't want my family seeing me this way so I begged the hospital staff not to tell you that I was there" Ben said

"But JR and Bobby searched the hospitals…..there was no sign of Jock" Ellie said

"Yes…well patient confidentiality…also money helps" Ben said

Miss Ellie shook her head. She didn't believe a word Ben was saying. She knew Jock; he wouldn't have let his family worry about him, believing he was dead when he was very much alive.

"So why the sudden appearance now?" Ellie asked

"I heard about Bobby's death…….I felt it was time to come home" Ben replied "I missed my family"

"So now tell me the truth" Miss Ellie said "Who are you?"

"I know this is real hard for you to understand…but I am telling you the truth" Ben answered

"So where have you been for the last four years" Miss Ellie said

"Recovering from my injuries" Ben said "But it doesn't mean that I forgot about my family…I read the newspapers to see what was happening"

"Well you know that I'm happily married" Miss Ellie said "If you are who you say you are…you have no right to come back here, as far as I'm concerned Jock is dead"

Miss Ellie made a move towards the door. Ben called her back

"Do you love him?" Ben asked

"What!" she replied

"I said do you love him" Ben said

"That is none of your business" Miss Ellie replied and walked out of the room.

Ben Stivers sat on the bed alone; cursing himself for leaving the letters lying on the bed. He had never intended for them to be found; now what was he going to do? He picked up one of the letter and began to read. He closed his eyes and thought back to a different time; a Southfork of a different era when both he and Miss Ellie had been so much younger. He remembered how they would spend time talking as he worked on the ranch; they could talk for hours on end; back then he knew what she was feeling, what her dreams were; he also knew her secrets.

Miss Ellie walked back towards the house. This was not happening; who was Ben Stivers? He couldn't be Jock; her Jock would never have deserted her for four years and let her believe he was dead. He would have done everything in his power to get back to his family. Her thoughts turned to Clayton; she did love him not in the way she loved Jock or Digger for that matter; but he made her feel safe, he was strong like Jock but warm and caring like Digger. She suddenly thought of the photograph that had been placed on Bobby's grave; had Ben placed it there and if he really was Jock why had he placed a picture of her and Digger there. She remembered that photograph, it had been taken about a week before she had split up with Digger and gone to Jock. They had been happy; she'd always imagined growing old with him by her side but it wasn't to be; she didn't regret marrying Jock, she had done what was best. Miss Ellie walked into the house. It was empty….she remembered a few years ago when it would have been buzzing with people, Lucy, Bobby, Pam, Sue Ellen, JR and her and Jock; these days it was her, Clayton, JR and Sue Ellen however strangely enough these days things seem to be settled; life was okay; there was hope for the future with a new baby. What was she going to do about Ben Stivers?

**A MacDonald's Restaurant**

Sue Ellen and JR watched John Ross and Christopher eat their second cheeseburger.

"Guess you guys were really hungry" JR said

"Daddy….playing in the park is hungry work" John Ross said

Sue Ellen laughed "Well that is your last cheeseburger tonight" she said "I don't want either of you two being sick during the night" she said

"Oh momma!" John Ross said

"Can we have donuts?" Christopher asked

"Just one" Sue Ellen replied

"Who wants to see a movie" JR asked

"ME" John Ross said "Can I choose"

"Okay" JR said "Which one"

John Ross looked at Christopher and smiled "Ghosbusters" they shouted in unison.

"Boring" Sue Ellen said

JR looked at her and kissed her cheek "Guess you're outnumbered my darlin'….three against one says we're going to see Ghostbusters" he said

"But we saw it the other week" Sue Ellen complained

"Momma it's a good film" John Ross said

Sue Ellen laughed "Okay you win" she said

"Yeah" the boys shouted "Ghostbusters"

After finishing their meal; JR and Sue Ellen took the boys to the movies. John Ross and Christopher sat between JR and Sue Ellen. JR looked at Sue Ellen, he knew she hated this film, it wasn't a romantic love story for a start. Maybe he'd make it up to her later. Halfway through the film John Ross climbed onto his father's lap.

"What's wrong with you seat?" JR asked

"Nothing, but I can see better here" John Ross replied

Sue Ellen looked at Christopher; wondering what was going on inside his head. His eyes were glued to the film but she knew he must miss Bobby. She also knew that Mark would make a good substitute. Seeing him sitting in his seat, he looked so small, she stroked his head and reaching for him pulled him onto her lap. Christopher cuddled into her. Seeing the empty spaces between them, JR moved himself and John Ross to bridge the gap. Sue Ellen smiled and rested her head on his shoulder. JR gently kissed her and reached for her hand.

"Are you okay?" He asked

"Mmm" Sue Ellen replied "Actually this isn't a bad film"

JR laughed "Not exactly 'Love story' though" he said

Sue Ellen looked at him and smiled "Can't see your son sitting through that one I'm afraid"

JR kissed her forehead "I'll tell you what, how about one night we let John Ross sleepover at Pam and Mark's; then we get Momma and Clayton to spend the night in town; then we get the most romantic video you want to watch and curl up together on the sofa eating popcorn" he said

"Hmmm; or maybe we could forget the popcorn and the video and just curl up and eat each other" Sue Ellen smirked "After all I've always found you more tasty then popcorn"

"You have some good ideas Mrs Ewing" JR whispered "But I'm serious, you can find your favourite weepy and we'll cuddle up and watch it together"

"You've got a deal" Sue Ellen replied

JR reached for Sue Ellen's hand and squeezed it "I love you" He whispered in her ear

"I love you too" she said "Now be quiet; we're trying to watch this film"

They continued to watch the film in silence; JR still holding Sue Ellen's hand. When the film was over they walked back to where their car was parked.

"JR as much as I love our son; this child has to be a girl" Sue Ellen said as she kept her eye on the two boys running towards the car.

JR looked at her "I don't care what it is" he said

Sue Ellen laughed "Neither do I really, but a girl would be nice…I'd have someone to go shopping with and dress up" she said

"Hmmm a girl would be nice" JR said "I'm just worried about John Ross; I don't want to turn into my father"

"Stop worrying JR; I have faith in you to know that that is not going to happen. You are not Jock; I can't believe that you would favour one child over another. You know how that feels" Sue Ellen replied

"I'm going to bore you, I keep going over the same things over and over again" JR said

Sue Ellen stopped and turned to face him "JR you could never bore me; for so many years you've bottled up your feelings about Jock, Miss Ellie and your childhood, finally I've managed to unlock the barriers that you've built over the years. I want you to talk to me" she said

"I just keep remembering all the times he called me a 'jackass'; all the times he chose Bobby over me and it hurts Sue Ellen; all I ever wanted was for him to love me or at least show me in some way that he loved me but he never did. Everything I did was to get his approval; his love" he said

"JR you have always had my unconditional love; noone has ever been able to take that away from you, not Cliff or Dusty. As for John Ross, he knows you love him and he loves you; he also knows he can twist you around his little finger; that you will do anything for him." She said "I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure you never feel rejected again; and we will both make sure that John Ross never feels that way"

JR kissed her "Let's go home" he said

They drove to Pam's house to drop of Christopher then began the journey back to Southfork.

**Southfork**

Miss Ellie sat alone in the living room. Clayton was still working on the ranch while JR and Sue Ellen had taken John Ross out. She didn't know what to do or what to think. If Ben Stivers was telling the truth'; what would it mean for the family. This would destroy her and Clayton; just when everything was almost perfect. Her thoughts were interrupted by Clayton returning, he walked into the living room.

"Hi Ellie; where is everyone" he asked

"JR and Sue Ellen have taken John Ross and Christopher out for a burger and a movie" she replied "They won't be back for a while"

"I never thought I would say this but I'm glad things seem to be working out for those two; I have never seen Sue Ellen look so radiant" Clayton said

Miss Ellie smiled and looked at Clayton. He noticed her tear stained cheeks

"Ellie what's wrong" he asked

"Clayton, I went looking for you this morning and ended up at Ben's place thinking you might be there. There was some papers on his bed and curiosity got the better of me and I looked at them" she started

"What happened" Clayton asked

"Those papers were letters that I had written to Jock when he was in South America" Ellie replied "Ben had them, he also had a knife with Jock's initial carved on it. When I confronted him he claimed that he was Jock"

"What?" Clayton said

"He said…………he said he was Jock" Ellie replied

Clayton looked stunned "You can't be serious" He said

"Clayton he has letters that I wrote to Jock when he was in South America; someone placed an old picture of Southfork on Bobby's grave….I'm not sure what I believe anymore" she replied

"I'm going to talk to him now" Clayton said

"Please don't…leave it until the morning" she said

"Ellie…how can I leave it….if he is who he says he is…what does he want after all this time?" Clayton asked "It's been four years"

"I don't know" Ellie said "All he told me was that for the past four years he has been receiving treatment for the burns he suffered during the plane crash….finally he decided to come home"

"You sound as though you believe him" Clayton said "Or that you want to believe him…if he is telling the truth who would you choose him or me"

Ellie closed her eyes "Clayton if he is Jock, our marriage isn't legal" she said "If it is him…he's still my husband"

"Yes….but for the past four years he's let you think he was dead…what sort of husband does that to his wife" Clayton replied

"He didn't want to us to have to go through the pain of watching him suffer during his treatment" Miss Ellie said

"But it was okay for you to think he was dead" Clayton said "He didn't think about the pain that would cause you"

Miss Ellie was about to speak but stopped as she heard the sound of a car engine.

"JR and Sue Ellen are back" she said "Let's leave this conversation until later"

"Why I'm sure JR will be delighted to know that his father is alive and that I'm no longer part of this family" Clayton said

"Clayton you are part of this family….I don't think I could have survived Bobby's death without you" Ellie said

"But I'm not Jock" Clayton replied "And if it's a choice between him or me, he wins…I'm going to get some fresh air"

Miss Ellie watched Clayton leave; part of her wanted to go after him but she couldn't. She felt confused. She didn't want to believe Ben's story but if he was telling the truth…then her marriage to Clayton was a lie.

Clayton watched JR and Sue Ellen get out of the car; seeing them with John Ross they looked really happy; the perfect family but he secretly worried about Sue Ellen and hated the thought of her being hurt again by JR.

"Hey Clayton" Sue Ellen said as she approached him "It's a beautiful night out here isn't it"

"Yes" Clayton said, looking at John Ross he said "Have you had fun tonight"

"Yes" John Ross said "We played in the park, had hamburgers and then went to see 'Ghostbusters"

"And now it's time for bed" Sue Ellen said "Go and get ready we'll come and say goodnight shortly"

"Okay" John Ross replied

"Is momma inside?" JR asked

"Yes, I just felt like getting some fresh air" Clayton replied

"Okay, we're going to check on our son" Sue Ellen said "See you shortly"

"Sure" Clayton said

JR and Sue Ellen walked into the house; they checked to see if Miss Ellie was in the living room but couldn't find her.

"She must be upstairs or in the kitchen" JR said

"Hmmm, something's wrong" Sue Ellen said "Clayton didn't look very happy"

"Wonder what he's done to upset her" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at him and shook her head "Come on let's go and get our son in bed" she said

John Ross was getting ready for bed when JR and Sue Ellen walked into his room.

"Momma can I listen to the story tapes?" He asked

"Not tonight sweetheart it's late" she said

"Come on buddy, it's time to go to sleep" JR said as he walked to the bed. They both tucked him in and kissed him goodnight. Switching off the light they closed his door. Hand in hand they walked downstairs and into the living room; finding Miss Ellie on her own"

"Hi Momma" JR said

Miss Ellie looked at the couple and smiled "Did you two have a nice evening?" she asked

"Yes" they replied

"Momma what's going on; we just saw Clayton sitting alone outside" JR asked

"Everything's fine" Miss Ellie said

Just at that moment Clayton walked back into the house "Fine, is that what you call it" he said "How can everything be fine"

"Clayton…please just leave it" Miss Ellie pleaded

"Momma, what's going on?" JR asked

"Ben Stivers" Clayton replied "He claims he's Jock Ewing"

JR and Sue Ellen looked at each other "He's lying!" JR said "What does he want"

"I don't know…..he had some letters that I wrote to your father before he died; he also had one of your father's knives" Miss Ellie said "Then there was the photograph that was left on the grave"

JR thought for a moment "Also the watch" he said

"What watch?" Clayton asked

JR sighed "Sue Ellen and I were out by the treehouse last week and I noticed a box on Bobby's grave…I opened it up and inside was the watch momma gave daddy for their 30th wedding anniversary" he said

"JR why didn't you tell me about the watch" Miss Ellie asked

"Because we didn't want to upset you" Sue Ellen said

"Also I wasn't sure that you hadn't put it there" JR said

"Why would you think that?" Miss Ellie asked

"I thought that maybe daddy hadn't taken it to South America and you had found it and put it on Bobby's grave because he was daddy's favorite" JR replied

"JR I would never have done that…beside I know for a fact that your daddy took the watch with him" Miss Ellie said "He never went anywhere without it from the moment I gave it him"

"Something doesn't make sense" Sue Ellen said "If Ben Stivers is Jock; then why did he place an old picture of Southfork with you and Digger on the grave; surely he would put one of you and him"

Clayton looked at Sue Ellen "Yes that does seem odd; I mean they were enemies" he said

"I don't know" Miss Ellie said "But it's too late to do anything tonight"

"First thing in the morning I'm going to see him" Clayton said "I want him off this ranch"

"Clayton this isn't your ranch" Miss Ellie said "It's mine and I'll decide who leaves and who stays"

Clayton turned to leave. He had heard enough….he couldn't believe Miss Ellie would actually consider that this man was who he claimed to be.

"Where are you going?" Miss Ellie said

"As far away from here as possible" Clayton replied "After all how many times does a person need to be told that they're not really part of this family?"

"Clayton…wait" Sue Ellen said

"Darlin' let him go" JR said "He needs to cool off"

"It's late…I'm going to bed" Miss Ellie said "Goodnight"

"Goodnight" JR and Sue Ellen replied

After watching Miss Ellie go upstairs Sue Ellen turned to JR and said "Do you fancy a nightcap"

"Yes" JR said "How about a coffee"

Sue Ellen smiled "Come into the kitchen and I'll make you one"

JR sat at the kitchen table watching Sue Ellen making the coffee. He was deep in thought when Sue Ellen placed the coffee mugs on the table. Sitting down she reached across and took his hand.

"What are you thinking?" she asked

"I don't know" JR said "I don't believe a word this man is saying…okay he may have some of daddy's things but there's no way he's daddy. I mean daddy wouldn't have disappeared for four years and leave us to think he was dead…he loved his family"

"I know…but maybe there was a reason that he didn't want you to know he was still alive" Sue Ellen said.

JR thought for a moment "What do you think?" he asked

Sue Ellen walked to him "I don't know….perhaps he's someone who was there when your daddy died…but I can't believe Jock would leave it so long to contact his family" she said "But I'm more concerned about how you're feeling at the moment"

JR put his arms out for her and she fell into his lap "Sue Ellen, if he's telling the truth and he is daddy…then coming back here must be one hell of a disappointment. His favorite son is lying cold in a grave while I'm still alive" he said

"Sweetheart don't say that" Sue Ellen replied

"Why not…it's the truth" JR said "But if I'm completely honest…and I'm only ever gong to say this to you…I hope it's not him. I don't want to have to go back to proving myself and having him look at me as though I'm a failure and wishing that he was looking at Bobby and not me. You know I can remember being John Ross' age and being absolutely terrified of my daddy…he was so strong and powerful and even as I got older I still had to do everything he told me too….he still had the ability to scare me"

"I didn't think the great JR Ewing was scared of anything" Sue Ellen smiled

"Only of him, Sue Ellen…he was the only person who could put the fear of god into me" JR said

Sue Ellen kissed him "We don't know if it is him." She said

"This past year this family has been through hell with Bobby's death but we've come through the bad times…everything was perfect and I don't want that to change" JR said

"Hey nothing is going to change" Sue Ellen said

"I don't want to have to put long hours into Ewing Oil because that it's what daddy expects me to do; I don't want to force John Ross into working with me at his age because that's what daddy expects me to do. I want to spend time with my family" JR said "Ewing Oil takes second place with me now, you are my priority"

Sue Ellen hugged him I love you…so very much" she said "Let's see what happens in the morning"

JR smiled "Come on let's go to bed…I'm tired our son seems to have worn me out" he said "Do you think John Ross was ever scared of me"

Sue Ellen laughed "No" she said "He knows he can twist you around his finger and make you do anything he wants. I swear if he wanted the moon you'd get it for him and he knows it"

"I don't ever want him to feel the way I do; not really knowing if my father ever loved me" JR said

"JR your family loves you…never forget that" Sue Ellen said

JR put his arm around her and they walked back towards the stairs. They heard the sound of a car engine move up the drive.

"I think Clayton's back, I'm going to talk to him" Sue Ellen said "I'll see you upstairs"

JR kissed her "Don't be long" He said

Sue Ellen walked outside to the patio; Clayton was just getting out of his car. She walked towards him and kissed his cheek.

"Hey" she said

"I was going to stay in a hotel" Clayton said

"There's no need for that" Sue Ellen said "You're still a part of this family"

"I don't feel it" Clayton said "If Ben Stivers is telling the truth; where does that leave me"

"I don't believe he is telling the truth" Sue Ellen said

"Ellie told me that if he is Jock then our marriage isn't legal" Clayton said "She made it sound as though she would choose him over me"

Sue Ellen sighed "I hope he's not Jock…there are things about Jock that make me so angry; most of them concerning his treatment of JR" she said

"I bet JR would love to have me off this ranch and his precious father back" Clayton said

"Don't be too sure of that" Sue Ellen said "Things aren't always what they seem. There's a side to JR that only I've seen; there are things he's told me that he wouldn't tell anyone else. I don't think JR wants to see you thrown off this ranch. Beside you're the closet thing I have to a father so I never want to lose you"

"I don't want to lose this family" Clayton said "They've all I've got"

Sue Ellen kissed him "You wont" she said "You need to get some rest"

"Okay, I'm going to sleep in one of the guest rooms tonight; I can't face Ellie" he said

"Goodnight" Sue Ellen said

"Goodnight" Clayton replied

Sue Ellen walked upstairs and into her bedroom; JR was already in bed.

"How's Clayton" He asked

"Upset" Sue Ellen replied "Worried that he's going to lose this family; he thinks you'd be pleased to have him thrown off this ranch and your daddy back"

JR laughed "That may have been true at one time but not now…Clayton is good for this family. I don't think momma would have coped with Bobby's death without him. John Ross and Christopher love him like a grandfather and to be honest he's probably better at being a grandfather than my daddy would have been. At least Dusty always knew that his father loved him no matter what he did" JR said "And I also know what he means to you…so no I don't want him off this ranch"

Sue Ellen got changed and climbed into bed. She snuggled up to JR and kissed him. "Let's get some sleep." She said

JR put his arms around her and pulled her closer to him; holding each other tightly they drifted off to sleep.

**Ben Stivers Room**

Ben lay on his bed staring at the ceiling. He was unsure of what his next move should be or what he actually hoped to achieve. He thought about the picture he left on the grave wondering if it evoked any memories for Miss Ellie. He knew when that picture had been taken…a few weeks before she had broken up with Digger. Did she wonder why that picture had been placed there? That picture was taken a lifetime ago but did Miss Ellie remember those days.

**Sue Ellen and JR's Room**

JR woke up early the following morning. He hadn't really slept all night...his mind was working overtime thinking about his father. He looked over towards Sue Ellen who was sleeping peacefully. Not wanting to wake her up he quietly got out off bed and pulled on his robe. Gently he opened the balcony window and stepped outside to watch the sunrise on the start of a new day. His thoughts wandered to Ben Stivers and what would happen if he was telling the truth. Not that he thought he was. He hated to admit it but he didn't want it to be true; his conversations with Sue Ellen over the past few weeks made him realize how much pain he had bottled up inside him over the way his father treated him. He couldn't bear the thought of having Jock back and trying to prove he was good enough to be his father's son. He looked back to the bedroom where Sue Ellen was sound asleep. He hated the way he had treated her over the years….never realizing that in her he had an ally, someone who would forever support him and never let him feel rejected or second best. He was determined that from this moment on his priority was Sue Ellen and his children; Ewing Oil would take second place.

Sue Ellen woke up and reached for JR, finding the empty space she sat up. Seeing the balcony window opened she put on her robe and went outside. Seeing JR sat in the chair with his back towards her she crept up behind him and putting her arms around his neck, kissed him.

"Hey" she said "Why didn't you wake me?

JR got up and turned around smiling at her "You looked so peaceful" he said

"Are you okay?" she asked

"I think so….I was just enjoying the view….this is one of my favourite times of day" JR said "Everything is so peaceful"

Sue Ellen smiled "What's going on in that mind of yours" she said

"Wouldn't you like to know" JR laughed "I was just thinking about daddy"

"What about him?" Sue Ellen asked

"I don't know…I just seem to be playing the same old things over and over in my mind. The fact that he never really showed that he loved me, that he'd think I was a failure and basically I wasn't good enough to be his son" JR replied

"Okay JR listen, you are not a failure…you have a successful oil company; you have a wife and child who love you very much…that is not being a failure. As for your father I think he loved you but couldn't show it" she said

"But he managed to show Bobby" JR said "He built him that treehouse; forgave him for marrying Pam even though she was a Barnes; allowed him into Ewing Oil and gave him equal control with me even though Bobby had never shown any interest in the company before he got married. Most of the time he sided with Bobby against me. Yet I was the one who put all that I had into Ewing Oil"

"JR what am I going to do with you?" Sue Ellen said "I love you….in fact you are the only man I have ever loved, we can't change the past but what's important is the here and now. Do you know how much I enjoy waking up next to you…feeling your strong arms wrapped tightly around me keeping me safe? Do you know how much I love looking into your steel blue eyes and seeing your love for me shine in them? Those same eyes that our son has inherited…all I have to do is look into them and I melt…I can't deny either of you anything. Do you know how much I love spending time with you whether it's making love or just walking and talking together; sitting underneath the treehouse; you laying with you head in my lap? You are the only person I have ever wanted….noone else ever measured up to you…not Cliff, not Dusty or Clint…you are my world and I hate seeing you hurting like this."

JR stood up and wrapped his arms around her; kissing her on the lips. Sue Ellen pulled him closer to her, just at this moment she wanted to give him all the love she had. She wanted him to know that to her he was special.

"Hey it's still early we could go back to bed for a while" Sue Ellen said, she took him by the hand and led him back into the bedroom. After undoing his robe she slowly slid it off him. JR sighed as she began planting small kisses on his body. She then pushed him down onto the bed. Climbing on top of him she kissed him passionately on the lips. As JR kissed her he attempted to get her nightdown off her wanting the feel of her naked skin next to him. Slowly and passionately they began to make love; enjoying the feel of each other until finally they reached the height of their passion and they became one, united in their endless love Afterwards Sue Ellen held JR tightly and kissed him.

"That felt so good" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "A perfect way to start a morning" she said

"I'm not quite finished yet" JR smirked "I want to kiss you all over"

"Sue Ellen laughed "What are you waiting for then?" she said

Sue Ellen closed her eyes and relaxed as JR worked his way down her body; kissing every inch of it. He stopped for a second at her tummy; thinking about his unborn child laying safely inside, he gently kissed it then moved on going lower and lower until he found what he was looking for. Sue Ellen felt totally relaxed; she loved JR doing this to her. Feeling JR's tongue reach her folds she opened her legs wider allowing him access to her womanhood. JR gently licked her; Sue Ellen moaned with pleasure loving the feeling that he was giving her. JR continued to pleasure her. here" she said

"In a minute" he replied "Let me do this"

"God…JR I can't take anymore" she said; she grabbed hold of the bedspread and bucked as she felt her orgasm wash over her. Every single muscle in her contracted; slowly she began to relax and reached out for JR. He worked his way back towards her and she pulled him into her arms and held him tight.

"I love you" she said

"I love you too" JR replied "In fact I love being here with you; you make me feel wanted"

"That's because you are" Sue Ellen laughed

"I was just thinking about the baby" JR said "How long before I can feel it moving inside you"

"Not for another couple of months and if it's anything like John Ross; once it starts kicking it wont stop" she laughed

"I remember when you were pregnant with John Ross; you were about six months into the pregnancy and passed out drunk in bed….I climbed into bed with you…although I doubt you knew I was there" JR said "Well I remember thinking that for some reason I wanted to be close to you…it was funny part of me hated you for sleeping with Cliff and carrying his child but another part of me still loved you. That night for about half an hour I held you knowing that you were too drunk to feel anything…I felt John Ross kick"

"How did you feel?" Sue Ellen asked

"It was amazing….it was such a powerful kick but I remember feeling sad because I knew he wasn't mine" JR said "But for that half hour while I held you in my arms and felt him kick I pretended he was mine and that we were happy. I wish things had been different"

"This time they will be….every night you can hold me in your arms and feel our baby kicking. I'm going to let you take care of me. I want you to be a part of this pregnancy….I want to share everything with you and that includes doctor's visits. And so that John Ross doesn't feel left out we're going to spoil him too. When the baby's born we'll include him in everything we do….whether it's feeding the baby…bathing it" Sue Ellen said

"Hey we could teach him to change diapers, then we wouldn't have to do that job" JR laughed

"We'll also going to make time for him; do things that he wants to do….he needs to know that nothing is going to change that we still love him" Sue Ellen said

"I agree…in fact I might take him on a fishing trip when he's on holiday" JR said "Have a boy's day out"

"He'd love that" Sue Ellen said

"I can't wait until we get away from this place and have some family time…just you, me and John Ross" JR said

"Don't forget Christopher" Sue Ellen smiled

"He'll keep John Ross company" JR said "And I'm sure I can find ways to entertain you"

"We should get up" Sue Ellen said

"Damn….why can't we just shut the world away and stay here all day" JR said

"Because we have a six year old son who needs looking after also we have the problem of Ben Stivers to deal with" Sue Ellen replied

"I'm going to go with Clayton to have a talk with him; find out what he wants because he's sure as hell not Jock Ewing" JR said "I want to know where he got my daddy's things from."

"I'm just worried about Clayton….I think he's realized that Miss Ellie is still in love with Jock and if it was a choice between Jock and Clayton she would choose Jock" Sue Ellen said

"I never thought I would hear myself say it but Clayton's a good man; I know he loves momma but I guess there's a part of momma that will always love daddy…I mean they share a history…they had three children together so there's a connection there" JR said

"We're the only family he has JR….Dusty is out on the rodeo circuit all the time and very rarely keeps in touch" Sue Ellen said "I just hate the thought of Ben Stivers telling the truth and Clayton moving back to the Southern Cross alone"

"It's not going to happen" JR said "Come on let's get dressed"

**Southfork Patio**

After getting dressed they went downstairs to have breakfast. Miss Ellie and Clayton were sat in silence neither of them eating. John Ross sat eating his breakfast feeling confused by the lack of conversation from the adults. His face lit up when he saw his mother and father.

"Hey momma, daddy" he said "You're up late again"

JR laughed and went over and kissed his son "We are not, you always get up too early" he said

"That's because you make me go to bed early" John Ross said

"Hey are you ready for school" Sue Ellen said

John Ross looked at his mother and pulled a face "Momma!" he said "I don't want to go to school"

"Sorry son, but you have too" JR said

"Go and get your things" Sue Ellen said

John Ross started to protest but thought better of it. After he had gone JR turned to Clayton.

"Are you still planning on going to see Stivers" He asked

"What do you think?" Clayton replied

"Mind if I join you" He said

"JR I don't want any trouble" Miss Ellie said

"Momma we're just going to talk to him" JR said "See what he wants and what he knows about my daddy's death"

"Miss Ellie why don't you come with me to take John Ross to school, then maybe we could go into town" Sue Ellen said

"Momma that's a good idea" JR said

"Okay" Miss Ellie said

"Alright, I'll just go and make sure John Ross is in fact getting ready for school" Sue Ellen said

Ten minutes later Sue Ellen and Miss Ellie drove out of the gates of Southfork. JR and Clayton were left alone on the patio.

"Well are you ready?" JR asked Clayton

Clayton looked at him "As ready as I'll ever be" he replied

"Okay let's go" JR said

**Downtown Dallas**

Sue Ellen and Miss Ellie dropped John Ross off at school then decided to go into town. After spending an hour shopping they decided to go for a coffee.

"Did JR say much last night" Miss Ellie asked after their coffee had arrived

Sue Ellen thought carefully about what she should say "He doesn't believe Ben Stivers is Jock" she said

"I honestly don't know what to think; if he isn't Jock then who is he and what is he doing with Jock's possessions" Miss Ellie said

"I don't know" Sue Ellen said

Wanting to change the subject Miss Ellie said "How are you?"

Sue Ellen smiled "I'm fine…it seems the morning sickness has disappeared" she said

"I can't believe how attentive JR is being" Miss Ellie said "Completely different from last time"

Sue Ellen laughed "I think we had …..major problems last time; there were things that the family didn't know. We weren't getting along…my drinking…his affairs…it really was a bad time" she said "However JR surprised me last night. We were talking about the baby and he told me that he remembered climbing into bed with me one night after I was out cold due to drink; he said for half an hour he held me and felt John Ross kick. Just for that moment he pretended we were happy"

"I never thought of JR as ever being paternal" Miss Ellie said "He's always kept his emotions in check; I always thought he was more business orientated"

"You'd be surprised" Sue Ellen said "He has always wanted more children but it was me who didn't. I couldn't bring another child into our volatile relationship; I didn't want to watch another child go through what John Ross has gone through…but now things are different; I really feel that we've reached a new depth in our relationship. He knows that I will always be there for him and he's begun to open up to me"

"Have you told him that you're going to continue to work" Miss Ellie asked

"Yes and he'll support me as long as I don't overdo things" Sue Ellen said "However I'm not going to neglect my children through working. I want to see if Mark will let me work part time or even from home"

"How are Mark and Pam; we haven't seen them in ages or Christopher for that matter" Miss Ellie said

"They're all fine…we took Christopher with us last night and we had a brief conversation with Pam and Mark when we took him home. I think Mark is good for Pam, I know part of her will always love Bobby but she seems happy" Sue Ellen replied

"I miss seeing Christopher" Miss Ellie said "He's growing up so fast"

"Both the boys are" Sue Ellen said "I'll tell Pam to bring him to Southfork soon"

"That would be good" Miss Ellie said "It seems that this family is on the verge of falling apart. We've come so far in a year and I thought things had settled down, we were all happy"

"We still can be Miss Ellie; we just need to find out who Ben Stivers is and what he wants" Sue Ellen said

"Clayton hasn't said a word to me since last night" Miss Ellie said

"He's just worried about losing his family" Sue Ellen said

"He's a good man" Miss Ellie said

"I know" Sue Ellen said

**Ben Stivers room**

Ben heard the sound of knocking on the door; looking out of the window he saw JR and Clayton standing on the doorstep. Breathing heavily he opened the door.

"What do you want" He asked

"What do you think" Clayton replied "Who are you?"

"I'm Jock Ewing" Ben replied

"Are you hell" JR said "What are you doing with my father's things"

"Is that any way to talk to you daddy" Ben said

JR moved forward but Clayton stopped him.

"I told Ellie why I didn't make contact with you after the plane crash. I suffered burns and had to have surgery. I didn't want you seeing me like that"

"You're lying" JR said "There is no way….I mean no way my daddy would have let his family think that he was dead; Bobby and I searched every single hospital in South America"

"Yes but I pleaded with the medical staff not to let anybody know that I was alive" Ben replied "I didn't want you seeing me that way"

"Why have you come back now" JR asked "After all these years…why make an appearance now"

"Maybe I just got tired of being on my own…perhaps I wanted my family back" Ben replied

"They're not your family anymore" Clayton said "They haven't been since the moment they declared you dead"

"I think you'll find that I'm still legally married to Ellie" Ben said

"Okay what do you want?" JR asked "How much money will it take to get you out of here"

"Typical JR…you think anything can be solved by throwing money at people" Ben said

JR felt his temperature rising "Look old man; I don't know who you are but one thing I do know you are not my father"

"I'm not interested in your money…I came here to be with my family" Ben said

"Okay I want you off this ranch now!" JR said

"You can't do that" Ben argued "I'm not being threatened by you"

"You're leaving one way or another" JR said

"Okay, throw me off this ranch but I guarantee I will go straight to the newpapers. Tell them who I am and how you threw me off my own home and remember this is my home…after all it was Ewing money that saved Southfork" Ben said "Can you imagine what the papers will have to say especially when you consider that your mother is a bigamist"

"I will have you destroyed if you even think of hurting my mother" JR said "You go to the newspaper and there wont be a hiding place big enough for you"

Ben looked at JR…and for a moment he saw Jock Ewing standing there. Jock had always been a bully and JR took after him in that respect. Demanding respect and issuing threats if things didn't go his way.

"JR let's go, there's no point talking to him" Clayton said

JR looked at Ben "I'm warning you; I want you off my land" he said

Ben said nothing; he refused to let JR intimidate him. Ben watched both men walk away before closing the door.

JR and Clayton walked back towards the house.

"Looks like Momma and Sue Ellen are back" JR said

"What are we going to do?" Clayton asked "I mean if we throw him off the ranch he'll go to the papers and we can't let him do that"

"Don't worry, I'll think of something" JR said

They walked into the house and found Sue Ellen and Miss Ellie in the living room.

"So what happened?" Miss Ellie said

"He's still saying he's Jock Ewing" Clayton said "And if we throw him off the ranch he'll go to the papers"

"Clayton we can't let him do that" Miss Ellie said

"There is one way we can prove that he isn't who he says he is" JR said

"What's that" Clayton asked

"By having a blood test…like the paternity test we went through with John Ross..one way or another it would prove that he's either lying or telling the truth" JR said

"What if he wont take one?" Clayton asked

"He'll have to if we get a court order for one" JR said

Miss Ellie looked at JR "No" she said "I wont have it. What if he's telling the truth. Can you imagine the scandal especially the fact that I've got two husbands"

"Momma he's lying" JR said

"No JR, I'll try and talk to him" Miss Ellie said. Her mind working overtime on the fact that Ben might just be her husband. She couldn't allow a blood test.

"Momma I'm going to phone Gary tonight and arrange things. It's the only way"

Miss Ellie looked her eldest son….her mind was spinning with thoughts, things she didn't want to think about. The thought of a blood test turned her cold; sometimes the truth was best left undiscovered. It was easier to live a lie…the truth was sometimes painful. She saw the determination in JR's eyes; there was nothing she could say to convince him to change his mind.

"JR please….let's find another way of getting rid of him. A blood test will destroy this family and I don't want that" Miss Ellie said

"So you think it is daddy?" JR said

Miss Ellie thought for a moment "I don't know…he could be and think of the scandal that could cause" she said

"But momma…you had daddy declared dead before you married Clayton. I mean he had been gone for over three years" JR said "Beside we can keep this out of the papers"

"You've got to be joking!" Miss Ellie said "Please JR drop this idea of a blood test"

"Sorry momma, I can't we need to find out the truth one way or another" JR replied "And this is the best way to do it"

"Ellie he's right" Clayton said

Miss Ellie sighed "Okay…if that's what you really want to do then do it….but don't say I didn't warn you" she said

Miss Ellie walked back into the house followed by Clayton. Sue Ellen and JR watched as they disappeared inside.

"What was that about?" Sue Ellen asked

"I have no idea" JR said "I know she's upset that if Stivers is really daddy then her marriage to Clayton is illegal but there's a good chance that he's not and a blood test will prove that"

"Sweetheart is there no other way to solve this?" Sue Ellen asked "I mean it's obviously causing your mother some upset"

"We've offered him money…he's refused it; we've told him that we'll have him thrown of this ranch…he's threatened to go to the media. Besides if we go to him and tell him that we want a blood test as proof of who he is he may just disappear" JR said

"I hope you're right" Sue Ellen said

"I Know I am" JR laughed "You know…I never thought I would ever want to prove that my daddy is dead"

Sue Ellen went to him and hugged him. "Even if it is him…nothing will change. I will not let him make you feel like a failure. I'm not the person I was four years ago if he hurts you I will hurt him ten times worse" she said

JR kissed her "I have to go into the office for a while, then I'll pick John Ross and Christopher up from school and drop them off at Pam and Mark's" he said "Maybe tonight we can go out for dinner….just the two of us" he said

"Okay" she said kissing him back. "I might try and talk to Miss Ellie"

JR walked over to his car and got in. Sue Ellen stood on the driveway watching him drive away. She turned round to see Clayton coming out of the house.

"How's Miss Ellie?" she asked

"I don't know…..she won't talk to me but I know something's bothering her" Clayton replied

"How are you doing?" Sue Ellen asked

"Part of me thinks I should just pack my bags and go back to the Southern Cross…I feel like I've lost already" he said

"Don't do that JR's hoping you'll help him move the furniture out of my old room so that we can start redecorating" Sue Ellen replied

"Is he serious about decorating on his own" Clayton asked

"We both want to do it" Sue Ellen said "I think we both want to spend as much time with each other as we can during this pregnancy and make up for what we've missed with John Ross. However we could do with some help"

"Have you got the crib yet? Clayton asked

"We've got John Ross' old one" Sue Ellen said "We may decorate that"

"Let me make you one" Clayton said "Carpentry was a hobby of mine years ago, I even made Dusty's"

Sue Ellen smiled "That would be wonderful!" she said kissing him "Thank you"

"I'm going to go and do some work on the ranch…I can't sit around here all day waiting for Ellie to talk to me" he said

Sue Ellen watched him go before she turned and walked into the house. Seeing that Miss Ellie was not downstairs she began to walk upstairs to Miss Ellie's room.

**Miss Ellie's room**

Ellie sat on her bed looking at old photographs of years ago. A time when she was happy and carefree. Her mind for some reason was focused on one man but it wasn't Jock; something else was troubling her something she hadn't thought about in years. Were the ghosts of her past finally catching up with her? She was so deep in thought that she didn't hear Sue Ellen knock on the door. Finally she looked up to see Sue Ellen standing in front of her.

"I'm not disturbing you am I" Sue Ellen asked

Miss Ellie smiled "No" she said "I was just looking at some old photographs"

Sue Ellen went and sat on the bed with Miss Ellie. Looking at the photographs she said

"You haven't got any of JR when he was a baby have you?" she asked

"What do you think?" Miss Ellie asked as she sorted through some of the photographs on her bed and handed Sue Ellen a couple. Sue Ellen looked at them and smiled.

"John Ross looked just like that when he was born didn't he" Sue Ellen said

"Yes I know….I think the only people who couldn't see it were you two" Miss Ellie said

"That was such a painful time for both of us" Sue Ellen said "I hate to think what would have happened if Digger hadn't started the paternity suite"

"I knew there was something in it" Miss Ellie said "But why…of all the men you could have had an affair with did you choose Cliff Barnes?"

"I don't know…to get back at JR….he showed me love and affection which JR hadn't done in a long time. It was a mistake" Sue Ellen said "If JR had treated me like he does now it never would have happened"

"Jock believed that Digger was just causing trouble but I realized there could be some truth in it…especially the way JR was with the baby" Miss Ellie said "He knew about you and Cliff didn't he"

"Yes he found out….once he discovered that Cliff could be the father of the baby things got worse for us….at one point I left JR and would have gone to Cliff but JR made him choose between me and his career and guess what he chose his career" Sue Ellen said

"You mean you would have given up being Mrs JR. Ewing and everything that went with it to go to Cliff?" Miss Ellie asked

Sue Ellen smiled "At the time…yes I would……I was so tired of JR cheating on me and publicly as well. He just didn't care who saw him" she said

Miss Ellie thought back to her own life. She had done the opposite; she had left Digger…the man she loved…the man….and gone to Jock for the security he offered her. Had she been right to do so. She thought about the Ewing/Barnes feud and how she was partly to blame for it.

"Sue Ellen have you ever done anything that you thought at the time was right but ended up regretting doing it" Miss Ellie said

"There's a lot of things I regret" Sue Ellen said "Mainly my drinking; having affairs to get back at JR; neglecting John Ross…things like that. But as for doing something that I thought was right at the time and regretting it…I can't think of anything…..why do you ask?"

"No reason I just wondered" Miss Ellie said

Sue Ellen watched her mother-in-law; there was something bothering her but Sue Ellen had no idea what it was.

"Miss Ellie why are you so against this blood test?" Sue Ellen asked

Miss Ellie remained silent trying desperately hard to collect her thoughts…..there was something she needed to say but couldn't. Noone would understand the real reason she didn't want that blood test.

"I just think it will cause a lot of trouble" Miss Ellie said

"You mean if Ben Stivers is Jock" Sue Ellen said "But it can be sorted out; if he is Jock…would you take him back"

"No!" she said "If he really is who he said he is…he stopped being my husband the day he made me think he was dead… I just want him to leave us alone"

"JR only wants the blood test to prove Ben to be a fake" Sue Ellen said

"Some things are best left alone" Miss Ellie said "I wish JR would just drop it"

"You know he wont do that" Sue Ellen said

"He's so stubborn" Miss Ellie said

"He's only looking out for the family" Sue Ellen said

"I know" Miss Ellie said "By the way have you seen Clayton?"

"Yes…he's out working in the fields" Sue Ellen said

"Avoiding me more like it" Miss Ellie laughed

"I think he doesn't know what to do at the moment…he feels like he's going to lose this family" Sue Ellen replied

"That's not going to happen…if Ben Stivers is Jock I will give him the fastest divorce you've ever seen" Miss Ellie said

Sue Ellen laughed "You know that's exactly what JR told me he'd do if it was proven that Cliff was John Ross' son" she said

"I don't think I could have coped with the last year if it hadn't been for Clayton…he's been a rock for me" Miss Ellie said

"You just need to talk to him…tell him what's bothering you" Sue Ellen said

Miss Ellie knew she couldn't tell anyone what was bothering her. Things that she had kept hidden for so many years were about to come to the surface and the blood test would be the catalyst; she needed to stop it but she didn't know how.

"Miss Ellie you've got all evening to talk to him; John Ross is staying with Christopher and my dearly beloved husband is taking me out to dinner" Sue Ellen said "Trust him…sometimes a problem shared is a problem halved"

Miss Ellie smiled…wishing that things were that simple.

"Hey Clayton's offered to build us a cot for the baby" Sue Ellen said trying to lighten the mood.

"That's good" Miss Ellie said

"I'm also hoping that he'll help JR move the furniture out of my old room, then we can start decorating" Sue Ellen said "It should be fun!"

"I can't wait to see JR hang wallpaper…he's never done anything like that in his life" Miss Ellie said

"He wants to" Sue Ellen said "He wants to share every second of this pregnancy with me"

"What about once the baby's born…the late nights…dirty diapers…how do you think he'll react to that" Miss Ellie laughed

"Hmmm, this time I think we're going to be okay" Sue Ellen replied

**Ben Stivers Room**

Ben sat alone in his room contemplating his next move or what the next move of the Ewings would be. He hadn't meant things to go this far and cursed himself for leaving the possessions he had on view and not locked away. He closed his eyes and sighed; things were moving too fast for him…all he actually wanted to do was visit the place he once called home; that was until it had been taken away from him. He thought back to that fatal week in South America when the plane had gone down…..the week he realized that the man he hated most in this world was there.

**JR's Office**

JR had just got off the phone from Harve Smithfield to arrange legal documents that would be required for the blood test as he knew that Stivers would possibly not agree to it. What was his game? What did he want…it obviously wasn't money? JR thought back to his conversation with Miss Ellie; he couldn't understand why she had been so set against the blood test, all he wanted to do was protect his family and prove Ben to be a liar. There was something going on with his mother but he couldn't for the life think was it was. He looked at his watch; realizing it was time for him to pick up John Ross he grabbed his hat and jacket and left the office.

**A Dallas Restaurant later that evening**

JR and Sue Ellen sat enjoying their meal and each other's company. Both feeling relaxed after the events of the past few days.

"So how was your afternoon?" JR asked

"Fine I had a chat to Clayton and Miss Ellie" she said "By the way Clayton wants to make us a new cot for the baby and he'd also like to help you decorate the nursery"

"Hmmm that would be good" JR said "I need some help moving the furniture as you're in no condition to do it"

"Who said I'm not" she laughed

"Hey I'm taking care of you this time and I say you cannot move furniture…you might do yourself some harm" JR said

"Clayton was also talking about going back to the Southern Cross…he feels he's losing Miss Ellie" Sue Ellen said "She hasn't spoken to him since you mentioned the word blood test"

"I don't know what's happening with her" JR said "I know things will be difficult if Ben is who he says he is but we can get around it"

"JR…there's something else bothering her and it goes deeper than what could happen to her marriage….she's preoccupied….I saw her looking through old photographs today…she even showed me some of you when you were a baby" Sue Ellen said

"She did!" JR said "urg I wish she wouldn't do that"

"Hey you were cute…just like John Ross was" Sue Ellen said "In fact John Ross is the image of you…Miss Ellie told me that she thought that we were the only two who couldn't see it when he was born"

"We both know why that was" JR said

"Also your mother asked me if I had ever done anything that I thought was for the best but later regretted…something is wrong" Sue Ellen said

"Yes but if she wont talk to us there's nothing we can do" JR replied

"I'm hoping she'll open up to Clayton tonight" Sue Ellen said

JR noticed the band start up and smiled

"Dance with me" he said

Sue Ellen smiled "Certainly" she said

Taking her hand JR led her onto the dancefloor. Holding each other close they began to slow dance.

"I love holding you like this" JR said "To have you so close to me"

Sue Ellen held him tighter as they continued to dance….both feeling the warmth of their love for each other. Content to be alone with each other; totally absorbed in each other unaware of their surroundings or other people on the dance floor.

"You know I never thought I could be this happy" Sue Ellen said "I love you so much"

"I love you more" JR said

"Impossible" Sue Ellen laughed "Whatever happens with Ben Stivers we'll see it through together; I will be there to support you…you are not alone. I'm going to be by your side forever."

"I've got so used to dealing with things on my own" JR said "I decided long ago that I didn't need people….that they would only let me down but you've changed me. These past few months you've proved how much you love me and how much I can rely on you"

"Hey what do you say we get out of here and go home" Sue Ellen said "And continue this dance in private?"

"You have some good ideas Mrs Ewing" JR replied

Hand in hand they walked out into the cool summer evening, laughing and joking with each other. Getting into JR's car they started the journey back to Southfork.

**Southfork**

Miss Ellie and Clayton sat in silence in the living room; the only sound that could be heard came from music playing from the radio. Clayton looked at her….he longed to know what was going on inside her head.

"Miss Ellie what's troubling you?" He asked trying to break the silence.

"Nothing…" she said

"Don't give me that….ever since JR has mentioned that blood test you have been on edge…..what is it?"

Miss Ellie went cold at the mention of JR's plans for the blood test.

"I don't want them to have a blood test….I'm just not sure that this isn't Jock" Miss Ellie replied

"A blood test would prove it" Clayton said

"You don't understand" Miss Ellie replied

"Then tell me" Clayton said

"I….I can't" Miss Ellie said tears beginning to fill her eyes "I can't"

JR and Sue Ellen drove through the gates of Southfork upon seeing the house Sue Ellen remarked that Miss Ellie and Clayton must still be up.

"Wonder what's going on" JR said

After getting out of their car they wandered slowly into the house.

"Please...Ellie I want to help" Clayton asked

Sue Ellen and JR stood back away from the door listening to what Miss Ellie would answer. Both Clayton and Miss Ellie had there backs to the door.

"Clayton…this is really difficult for me….I've been living a lie for so long now and it's about to come back and haunt me" Ellie began

"Go on" Clayton said

"I'm trying to protect JR…I'm not bothered about Gary or Ray having the blood test but I can't let JR take it" Miss Ellie said, tears streaming down her face.

Clayton remained silent waiting for her to tell him more.

"Clayton….Jock isn't JR's father" Miss Ellie cried "For so long I've kept this to myself but if he finds out through the blood test…I don't know what he'll do"

In the hall Sue Ellen looked at JR…seeing the look of shock on his face she squeezed his hand. Both walked into the living room.

"Momma" JR said

Miss Ellie turned around to see her eldest son standing before her…a look of confusion on his face.


	5. Chapter 5

"Momma" JR said

Miss Ellie turned around to see her eldest son standing before her…a look of confusion on his face.

Miss Ellie didn't know what to say….this was the secret she had planned to take to her grave…she knew the truth would destroy JR.

"Momma, what did you mean?" JR said

Miss Ellie looked at JR "I'm sorry JR you were never supposed to hear that" she said

"Is it true…was Jock not my father" JR said

Miss Ellie sighed "I'm sorry JR" she said

"Then who?" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at JR "Sweetheart it's late….let's go to bed and talk about this in the morning" she said

"No dammit…I want to know now" JR said "Momma has just admitted that the man I worshipped all my life is not my father…so I want to know who is"

Miss Ellie closed her eyes "Okay…JR sit down" she said

JR and Sue Ellen sat on the sofa; Sue Ellen gripped JR's hand tightly. The room went silent for what seemed like eternity…Miss Ellie didn't even know where to begin.

"Momma" JR said

Miss Ellie looked at her son…she really didn't know where to start "JR I was very young…."

"Momma, who is my father?" JR interrupted

"JR your father was a good man…someone I loved very much but he was unreliable. What I did I did for you…to give you a secure future" Miss Ellie said

JR remained quiet…his mind was racing with thoughts…he glanced at Sue Ellen and tightened his grip on her hand.

"This is really hard…and I know you're going to hate me for this which is why I planned on keeping it a secret forever" Miss Ellie said

"Momma go on" JR said

"This was a long time ago…a time when it was considered improper to have a baby outside of wedlock. At that point I was……I was involved with Digger Barnes….we've been going together since we were teenagers and one day I knew I would marry him. However there was one problem…he was totally unreliable…he would say he would do things and then forget….go out to some bar and get completely drunk. He formed a partnership with Jock Ewing; both of them wanted to create America's greatest Oil Company. Jock had the brains…he knew what he needed to do to build up a secure business on the other hand Digger knew how to find oil…he could smell the stuff even if it was miles away from him. The only problem with him was that he loved to drink…every single time they found oil Digger would go off for days on end celebrating until finally one of his buddies decided to bring him home." Miss Ellie said

Sue Ellen closed her eyes fearing what was about to be said. She looked at JR but he was expressionless; she knew he was in pain…all she wanted to do was take him in her arms and comfort him.

"Anyway I found out I was pregnant…..at first I was scare; I mean I was twenty one years old barely an adult myself but then once I got used to the idea I was happy. A few days later I decided that I needed to tell Digger so I told him that I was arranging a special dinner at Southfork…just the two of us" Miss Ellie said "However he told me that he and Jock were going to one of the oilfields as they were expecting an oilstrike….but he promised me he would be back by 7pm. I stressed that it was important that I talked to him and he told me he'd be there. I spent ages preparing a meal…then sat down and waited for him to appear. I waited all night for him to appear but he didn't. That night I cried myself to sleep; I knew our relationship was doomed…that I needed someone that I could rely on….if I had stayed with Digger I would have lost everything including Southfork; so I made a decision. Digger finally turned up at noon the next day with the smell of alcohol on his breath…I told him that it was over between us"

JR closed his eyes "Are you telling me that Digger Barnes was my father" he said

"JR your father was Jock Ewing…he was the one who brought you up" Miss Ellie said "But he wasn't your biological father"

"Ellie where does Jock fit into this story?" Clayton asked

"Jock was forever telling me that if I ever got tired of being let down by Digger that he would be waiting for me. At the time I wasn't interested…even then he was a hard man…he didn't have the warmth that Digger had. However I knew that if I married Jock that I would secure the future for me and my baby. Things were bad at Southfork; money was short but I knew I could solve that problem…so the day after I broke up with Digger I went to see Jock at Ewing Oil…I knew Digger wouldn't be there…he'd be drowning his sorrows somewhere. I invited Jock to dinner that night. I remember feeling terrible that afternoon while I prepared a meal for us. I was in love with Digger, I wanted him…he was the father of my child and I loved him but I knew that to do the best for my baby I had go to Jock. That evening Jock stayed the night….I needed to sleep with him so that he wouldn't suspect that he wasn't the father of my child. I felt dirty and cheap….as though I was selling myself. Anyway a month later we were married and a couple of weeks later I told him I was pregnant" she said

"Are you telling me that neither of them knew" JR said

"No…JR you were born two weeks late…which meant the baby Jock thought was his was premature but he failed to realize that premature babies are small and usually sickly" Miss Ellie said "I worried that he might pick up on the fact that you were surprisingly healthy for a premature baby but he didn't…as for Digger; once I married Jock I never saw him again until Bobby married Pam"

"Is there anyway you were mistaken that you were pregnant…maybe it was a false alarm and you actually fell pregnant the night you slept with Jock" JR asked, desperately trying to cling on to hope that he was Jock Ewing's son

"I'm sorry JR…I was already pregnant although I had already worked it out I had it confirmed a few days before I was going to tell Digger" Miss Ellie replied "Which is why I can't let you take this blood test…we don't know for sure that this isn't Jock and while there's a slightest chance that it could be….I don't want you to take the test"

JR closed his eyes trying to take in everything that his mother had told him. He wished this was a nightmare he could wake up from but he knew it wasn't. He felt Sue Ellen's hand tightly entangled with his….never in his life had he felt so relieved to have her by his side. He didn't know what he was feeling…hurt, anger, despair….so many emotions were running through him. All his life he had worshipped Jock Ewing…wanting to be like him…everything he had done was for his father's approval…now he found out his whole life was a lie. He opened his eyes and looked around him; his world was falling apart…the room felt as though it was closing in around him…he needed air…he needed to get out of the room. Suddenly he let go of Sue Ellen's hand and stood up.

"I've…I've got to get out of here" he said moving towards the door. Sue Ellen went to join him.

"Sue Ellen….please I need some time alone" JR said

"JR…don't shut me out" Sue Ellen said

JR turned to face her, Sue Ellen saw the pain in his eyes "Please" He said "I need to sort this out on my own"

Sue Ellen stood at the doorway and watched JR leave. Suddenly everything she had said to JR these past few months seemed pointless. She told him that she didn't want him bottling things up, that she would always be there for him, to listen to him when he needed someone. However tonight when she knew he was in pain and wanted to comfort him, he had rejected her preferring to deal with his pain on his own. She felt tears in her own eyes…she knew JR didn't trust her enough to allow her to help him through this. She felt helpless not really knowing what to do next. She was deep in thought when she heard the sound of Miss Ellie's voice.

"Sue Ellen, he'll be okay" Miss Ellie said "When have you ever known JR to be defeated"

Sue Ellen remained silent; she thought back to the time shortly after their divorce when Jock had gone missing….JR's world had been shattered, that time she couldn't help him but this time she could.

"Sue Ellen it's getting late and you need to rest" Clayton said "I'm sure JR will be okay"

Sue Ellen knew that JR was going to be anything but okay; the thought of having Digger Barnes as his father would destroy him.

"I think I'll wait up for him" she replied

"Goodnight" Miss Ellie said "Don't stay up too long"

Sue Ellen watched Miss Ellie and Clayton walked upstairs to their room. She realized how little Miss Ellie knew JR…she honestly thought that JR would be able to deal with this; did noone understand that JR was human just like anyone else; capable of feeling human emotions. She sat down on the sofa for a while…knowing she would never be able to rest until JR was safely back by her side.

**The Treehouse**

JR sat alone in the treehouse…he felt numb after hearing what his mother had told him. He didn't know what to do….nothing mattered anymore he wished he was in the grave with Bobby; noone would really care if he was dead anyway. He realized now why his parents didn't love him; he was an outsider not really a Ewing…not really part of their family. His thoughts went to his son; he loved John Ross more than anything in this world but even he would be better off without him. His thoughts next turned to Sue Ellen, the love of his life, the one person who never rejected him no matter what he did to her. He didn't deserve her love…he wished he had been able to open to her tonight and let her comfort him but he was afraid that if he let her see him like this she would think him less of a man. He needed her more than anything. Finally JR couldn't take anymore and for the first time in a long time he cried.

**Southfork**

Sue Ellen went upstairs to her room. She knew where JR would be but also realized t hat she couldn't climb up into the treehouse in the clothes she was wearing she had to change. The treehouse was the one place JR felt safe..the one place he would go to when he needed to escape. She looked out of the window at the dark surrounding Southfork; she didn't want to go out there alone but she needed to get to JR. There was no way that she was going to let him go through this alone. After getting changed she grabbed a torch and made her way outside. The night was silent a warm breeze still hung in the air; she sadly remembered how happy her and JR had been earlier. As quickly as possible she made her way. On reaching the treehouse she looked up at it; she hadn't been up there in ages. She remembered all the good times she had spent with JR up there. Slowly and carefully she began to climb. Breathing a sigh of relief at reaching the top she climbed into the house. JR was sat on the floor with his head in his hand sobbing; her heart went out to him…at this moment all she wanted to do was protect him. She crawled gently towards him.

"JR" she gently said

JR looked at her…his eyes red with crying "What are you doing here?" he said "You shouldn't be up here in your condition"

"Do you really think I'd leave you to cope with this alone" she said, she moved closer to him until finally she took him in her arms. JR clung to her and sobbed. Sue Ellen gently rubbed his back and reassured him telling him over and over again that she loved him; for twenty minutes he cried. Finally he began to relax, Sue Ellen held him tightly.

"I don't believe her" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at him waiting for him to go on.

"I think daddy knew I wasn't his; he didn't love me I was only his business partner" JR said

"Sweetheart I'm sure that's not true" Sue Ellen said

"I never had a birthday party not like Gary and Bobby; I never had friends as I always had to be helping him at Ewing Oil. Maybe that's why neither momma or daddy love me because they knew I wasn't theirs" JR said "I was Digger's son not Jock's so I wasn't really part of their family"

"Miss Ellie loves you JR; people just don't see you like I do, I don't think she realized that you needed her as much as Gary did" Sue Ellen said

"Momma always protected Gary from daddy but she never considered that I felt threatened by him too. I guess she thought that as long as daddy was bullying me Gary was safe"

"JR, Jock gave you his name; he even named our son…I honestly don't think he knew" Sue Ellen said

"Maybe daddy thought that he could make things right with Digger by taking his son into Ewing Oil and making him his business partner" JR said "You know part of me wishes I was in that grave with Bobby…I feel my whole life has been a lie. I wasn't a Ewing I was an imposter God I remember how I treated John Ross after he was born before we had the blood test"

"JR look at me" Sue Ellen said

JR looked at her and she saw the pain inside his eyes.

"Sweetheart your life hasn't been a lie….what about me, what about our son. We love you JR and we always will regardless of who your father is. What happened tonight doesn't change anything….you are still the only man I will ever truly love…the only one I want to be with" Sue Ellen said "John Ross adores you….after the custody he wanted to stay here with you; he loves being with you whether it's playing in the pool or doing homework…you're his daddy and he loves you"

"What do you think would have happened if momma had stayed with Digger?" JR asked

"I don't know sweetheart….I guess your momma was worried about the future and Southfork….she didn't trust Digger not to waste any money that Ewing Oil made for them and if they didn't have any money then they might lose Southfork" Sue Ellen said

"So you don't think she loved him" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "She loved him even after she went to Jock she still wanted him…she told me that a few days ago… she didn't love Jock when she married him; she just needed him to believe she did" she said

"Do you think Digger would have loved me if he had known the truth…if momma had stayed with him" JR asked

"I asked Miss Ellie what Digger was like when we found that photograph on the grave and she said he was the opposite of Jock; warm and gentle. I think he would have loved you in the same way that you love John Ross" Sue Ellen replied

"He loved Pam even though he knew she wasn't his daughter even after her mother left them" JR said

"Thinking about things now….I can understand why Digger hated Jock so much and what that hate did to him. I think he drank to ease the pain of what he had lost…after all it wasn't just Ewing Oil that Jock took from him…it was the woman he loved." Sue Ellen said "I don't know what he would have thought if he knew that Jock raised his son as well"

"I remember the paternity test….we had to retake it as Cliff and I had the same blood group" JR said "I wonder what momma thought about that time…she knew the truth…John Ross was Digger's grandson"

Sue Ellen closed her eyes…just at this moment she hated Jock. Hated him for his treatment of JR….never acknowledging when JR had done something good but always finding fault when JR had done something wrong. Jock was a bully…not only to Gary but also JR, the only son who hadn't suffered at his hands was Bobby. She also felt sympathy for Digger…being denied the family that was rightfully his. Never knowing his son or grandson.

"Where do I go from here?" JR asked breaking into Sue Ellen's thoughts.

Sue Ellen smiled "We move forward….I promise you nothing has changed. We plan for this new baby…..decorate the nursery and you can spoil me throughout this pregnancy. We also cherish our son….make sure that every day of his life he knows how much we love him" she said "Also we cherish each other; we renew our wedding vows and build a stronger relationship. With all my heart I will make sure you know how much I love you"

"I promise the same" JR said "Tonight I felt so alone; after momma told me the truth I was devastated and I couldn't let you see me like that….I thought if you saw me like that I wouldn't be the man you thought I was…so I told you I wanted to be alone but all I wanted was you…to feel your arms around me…comforting me"

"JR….you are the man of my dreams…nothing could ever change that. I have to admit I was disappointed tonight as I've told you so many times that I wanted to be there for you when you needed me and you rejected me. However I couldn't let you go through this alone, I knew I couldn't go to bed not knowing what was happening with you and I wouldn't be able to sleep until you were safely in my arms…so I decided to find you. You have to trust me…if there's one person in this world that you can trust…it's me" she said

"I can't take this blood test can I" JR said "The only problem is I've already phoned Gary and he's going to let me know when he's coming to Dallas"

"No but it doesn't mean that Ray or Gary can't take it" Sue Ellen said "We could say that you've already taken the test…for everyone's sake we need to know whether Ben Stivers is telling the truth"

"What if he is?" JR said

"Miss Ellie wont take him back" Sue Ellen said "She told me that…I just hope he's lying"

"This changes so much" JR said "For a start Barnes happens to be my half-brother; the Barnes-Ewing feud…God I even understand now why Digger hated daddy so much."

"JR; what Miss Ellie told you stays with the four people in that room" Sue Ellen said "Miss Ellie will never say anything and I'm sure Clayton wont either, so it will still remain a secret…for the rest of the world you are Jock Ewing's son"

JR held Sue Ellen tightly and kissed her "Thank you" he said

"What for?" she replied

"For being here…for listening to me and also for loving me" JR said

"Hey that's what I'm here for" She replied "I love you so very much and when you hurt I hurt"

"We should get back" JR said "It's getting late"

Sue Ellen smiled "Are you ready?" she asked

"Has momma and Clayton gone to bed?" he asked

"Yes…they went upstairs shortly after you left" Sue Ellen replied

"Okay let's go" JR sighed

JR helped Sue Ellen down from the treehouse and hand in hand they wandered back to the house.

Sue Ellen and JR walked back into the house. Everything was quiet.

"Fancy a nightcap?" Sue Ellen said leading him towards the kitchen.

JR looked at her and smiled, taking her in his arms he kissed her "Actually a coffee would be good" he said

They walked into kitchen; JR sat down and watched Sue Ellen make the coffee.

"Sue Ellen I don't know if I can face momma tomorrow" JR said "I don't know what to say to her"

Sue Ellen put the coffee cups on the table and went and sat in JR's lap.

"Sweetheart this is hard for her as well…I suspect that she wanted this secret never to come out and now that it has she probably doesn't know what to say or do" Sue Ellen said

"Do you think she did the right thing?" JR asked

Sue Ellen didn't know what to say "It was a difficult decision to make….stay with a man that was totally unreliable and risk losing your home or leave him for someone who could give you security…I don't want to judge her JR" she said

JR looked at her Okay…put yourself in her position what would you have done…I know what your mother would have done" he said

Sue Ellen playfully slapped his arm "I know what my mother would have got me to do!" she said "However I'm not sure I could have married a man I didn't love knowing that I was actually carrying the baby of the man I loved. I can't imagine what she went through"

"How did you feel being married to me when you thought you were carrying Cliff's baby?" JR said

"In the beginning I didn't think about it much….although I remember phoning him one day from town and asking him what color I should decorate the nursery but then as time went by and you constantly kept cheating on me, I knew I had to get out of the sham that was our marriage. After I left you I went to Cliff and told him I wanted to be with him, that I was prepared to give up everything if he thought we had a chance…but you put a stop to that by making him choose between me and his career" she said

"So you're saying you would have given up the Ewing name, the money…everything to be with the father of your child" JR said

Sue Ellen kissed him "At that time yes and if you hadn't done what you did…maybe Cliff and I would have been raising John Ross"

"Thank God I did" JR laughed "The whole family, including myself always thought that the reason you married me was for the Ewing name and money…but we were wrong. However now I see that my own mother married for money and not love"

"Like I said she did what she thought was best" Sue Ellen said

"Maybe Cliff is the lucky one….he never had to wonder whether his father loved him or not" JR said

"Sweetheart we can't turn back time; .but you know now that you are loved…not just by me but by our son" Sue Ellen said

"Sue Ellen if Ben Stivers is Jock I don't want him anywhere near John Ross…I don't want to let him do to my son what he did to me" JR said

"That is going to be difficult especially if he stays in Dallas; however we don't know that he is Jock" Sue Ellen said

"If I told you that I wanted to move away from Southfork…sell Ewing Oil and start somewhere else…would you come with me?" JR asked

"Of course I would…but let's not make any decisions yet…you're still in shock" Sue Ellen said

"Let's take John Ross out of school and go on this holiday as soon as possible" JR said "I can't wait to get away from here and just have some time alone to be a real family"

"Okay….do you still want Christopher to come" Sue Ellen asked

"Yes" JR said "Do you think he's okay with Mark?"

"Mark's fine…they spend quite a bit of time together" Sue Ellen said "Don't worry Mark….."

"Isn't Jock" JR finished her sentence for her.

"No" Sue Ellen said "I'm sorry JR……"

"Sue Ellen…for the whole of my life that man was my hero; hell if he had told me to jump of the Ewing Oil building I would have done it just to please him…but now I know that everything I did was in vain….I would never be good enough I wasn't a Ewing" JR said

Sue Ellen hugged him tightly and kissed him "Sweetheart….it's been a long day, you're tired and upset and you need some rest, why don't we go to bed?" she said

JR felt the tears form again…he didn't hold back he let them fall. For the first time ever he felt safe crying in front of someone. At last he found someone who he could trust and confide in….if only he had trusted her sooner. Sue Ellen held him and let him cry knowing that it was better to get his emotions out then bottling them up. Finally he began to relax; he looked up at Sue Ellen and she gently wiped his tears away.

"Why did momma do it….why couldn't she have given Digger a chance. All my life I thought I was unlovable…I mean try as hard as I could I never got any affection from either of my parents and now I know why…I wasn't part of their family" he said

"JR…listen to me….you have a family of your own now which you are very much a part of. And as for you being unlovable….JR there have been times when I could have killed you….times when I hated you but through everything I have always, always loved you" Sue Ellen said

"How can you hate someone yet love them at the same time?" JR asked

Sue Ellen laughed "It's hard to explain!" she said "Love is why I'm still here despite everything that you put me through…hate is how I felt when you cheated on me…when you made me feel worthless. I remember the time that you were shot…things had been really bad between us…you wanted to send me back to the sanitarium….the afternoon before you were shot I had the gun in my handbag and I was prepared to kill you, I felt I needed to take charge and not rely on Bobby or anyone else to help me. The morning afterwards when Kristin told me what had happened I felt so guilty then when I saw you lying there in hospital I melted….you looked so helpless that all I wanted to do was love you and make you better….every feeling of hate that I had for you was gone. I know that you're going through hell at the moment but I promise you that I'm here whenever you need me…and if Ben Stivers really is Jock I will never let him make you feel worthless again"

JR kissed her "Thank you…I really don't deserve you" he said

"JR we'll get through this together…now are you ready for bed or not" she smiled

"Okay" JR said

The following morning Sue Ellen woke before JR; they were both locked in a tight embrace. She looked at JR who was sleeping peacefully after having a restless night; watching him sleep she was reminded of how much John Ross looked like him even the fact that John Ross bit down on his bottom lip when he slept just as JR was doing now. She lay still not wanting to disturb him. After ten minutes he opened his eyes. Sue Ellen smiled at him and kissed his forehead.

"Hi sweetheart…how are you feeling" she asked

JR sighed "I don't know….I'm not sure what I'm supposed to feel…part of me feels angry with momma for what she did…..part of me hates daddy for making me hate the man who was my real father…I just feel so confused"

"Just take it one step at a time" Sue Ellen said

"What time is it?" JR asked

It's just after 8" Sue Ellen replied

"We should get up….but I don't want to face them yet" JR said

"You have to face them sometime and I'll be right here by your side. We'll do this together" Sue Ellen said

"Okay….as we'll doing this together….do you want to join me in the shower?" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed to see the mischievous look in JR's eyes "That's the best invitation I've heard all day" she said

After showering they got dressed and prepared for the day ahead. JR took Sue Ellen in his arms and kissed her.

"Do we have to leave this room today?" He said "I'd much sooner stay up here all day making love to you then go downstairs"

"JR as much as I would love to do that, you're going to have to face your mother at some point" she said "Beside I didn't think JR Ewing was afraid of anything"

JR held her even closer to him "Give me five more minutes with just you" he said, gently he pushed her towards the bed. Sue Ellen found herself giving in to him. Showering him with kisses she pulled him closer to her wanting to wipe away all the hurt and pain she knew he was feeling, she felt JR's hand go to the buttons of her blouse.

"JR we should get up" she said gently

"Just a few more minutes" JR said "Let me love you"

Sue Ellen smiled; the truth was she wanted him as much as he needed her; slowly they began to make love, tenderly they caressed each other, until they reached the heights of their passion and united in one body. As they began to relax Sue Ellen smiled at JR.

"I love you so much...you have no idea" she said

JR laughed "I think I do" He said "I've seen a different side to you tonight…when I felt my world was falling apart you came to my rescue…..I came close to wishing I was dead but you reminded me that there were people around who cared for me…that loved me, without you I don't think I would have survived last night. When I think about how I've treated you over the years you would be within your rights to think that what happened to me were just desserts"

"Hey…listen to me…you always forgive the ones you love no matter how horrible they are to you….I never want to see you the way you were last night. I can't make things right…I mean I know how you feel about your childhood….but what I can do is make sure that from this moment on you know how much you are loved" she said "Your family needs you JR…we need you to love and protect us"

"I am going to do everything in my power to make up for the bad times; I'm going to spoil both you and John Ross" he said

Sue Ellen laughed "I'm going to hold you to that; especially after this baby is born and it wakes up at three in the morning" she said

JR kissed her "I guess we should go downstairs" he said

Sue Ellen frowned "Let's not put this off any longer" she said

Hand in hand they walked downstairs together as they reached the bottom step Sue Ellen squeezed JR's hand…JR looked at her and smiled weakly. They walked into the dining room to find Miss Ellie sitting alone.

"Hi Miss Ellie" Sue Ellen said "Has Clayton left already?"

"Hi…yes he wanted to get an early start on the ranch" Miss Ellie replied "Good morning JR"

JR didn't reply…he went over and got himself something to eat before sitting down.

"I'm sorry about last night JR…it was something…you were never supposed to find out about" Miss Ellie said

"Obviously not" JR said "Why momma, why did you do it"

"JR I told you last night….I did what was best for you, for me and for Southfork" she said "I knew what Digger was like and that if we stayed with him we'd end up losing Southfork, money was already tight….we were finding it difficult to make ends meet and I didn't want to lose this place….it's been in my family for generations"

"So you got married to a man you didn't love because he had the money you needed to save Southfork" JR said

"Not just Southfork….Jock could provide a better security for you and me" Miss Ellie said

"And what about Digger….was it fair on him" JR said

"Digger didn't know anything….for all he knew Jock and I could have been carrying on behind his back" Miss Ellie said

"And were you?" JR asked "Is there a chance that Jock's my father"

"No" Miss Ellie said quietly "Digger is your father"

JR closed his eyes, Sue Ellen reached for his hand and he held it tightly.

"Momma how could you do it to me or him" JR said

"JR I gave you the best in life….you never had to worry about money or where your next meal was coming from" Miss Ellie said "Would you honestly change places with Cliff Barnes"

JR went silent…would he change places with Cliff? If it meant that he'd have a father who actually loved him yes he would have.

"Didn't think you would JR" Miss Ellie said "Jock is your father…he's the one who loved you…picked you up when you fell over….taught you the family business and made you the man you are today not Digger"

JR fought against the tears in his eyes. He thought about what his mother had said. His father never picked him up when he fell over…thinking about the time he was bolted from the horse..Jock had told him to grow up and then went looking for the horse not bothering whether JR was hurt or not, then there was the time that he wanted to go to Gary's birthday party but wasn't allowed and had to go to work. That wasn't being a loving father. He thought to how many times he had picked up John Ross after he had fallen over when he was learning to walk and cuddled him close to him soothing his tears, read him bedtime stories at night and watched while he slept. He hoped John Ross never felt the insecurity that he felt…that he knew how much he was loved.

"The Ewing/Barnes feud isn't just about Ewing Oil is it?" JR asked

"No, Digger felt that he had lost everything…that your father had stolen everything from him including me" Miss Ellie replied

JR laughed "He was right wasn't he" he said "The night the paternity test came through…Jock told everyone that John Ross was my son and his grandson…how wrong could he be….and how could you just stand there knowing the truth…knowing how bad things had been for Digger after Pam lost her baby…how much he wanted a grandchild. He had one…John Ross Ewing III my son his grandson"

"JR John Ross is not his grandson….I did what was right" Miss Ellie said "Jock was a good man, Digger was a waster…God knows what life would have been like if I stayed with him"

"But Digger knew how to find the oil…without that Ewing Oil would never have been" JR said

"JR don't even try to pretend you care about what Digger was cheated out off….you don't care about anyone….for years you've cheated on Sue Ellen, treated her like dirt….you're incapable of love…you use people to your own advantage….you will destroy anyone to get what you want…let's not forget that you drove Cliff to suicide a few years back" Miss Ellie said

JR looked at her knowing most of what she said was true "Don't turn this on me" JR said "Do you think it's fair that I was brought up to hate my father….to be constantly told what a lowlife he was"

"JR I'm sorry but this is in the past…it's over and there's no point discussing it" Miss Ellie said

"Tell me about Digger" JR said

"No JR..this discussion is closed" Miss Ellie said

"Momma I have a right to know what my real father was like" JR said

"JR I told you…I don't want to discuss it" Miss Ellie replied "Please just drop it"

JR looked at his mother…he knew by the look on her face that there was little point in going on with this conversation. Silently he got up from the table and walked out of the room. Sue Ellen watched him go….her heart was breaking…she knew he was in pain. After a minute she got up and went to him, seeing him by his car she called his name…JR turned around. Sue Ellen walked up to him and wiped the tears from his face.

"Sue Ellen she doesn't understand, daddy never loved me. I can't recall a single time that he read me a bedtime story…picked me up when I fell over…helped me with my homework. He didn't love me neither of them did not really" he said

"Ssssshhhh" Sue Ellen said "Let's take my car and get out of here for a while"

Hand in hand they walked over to Sue Ellen's car and got in, Sue Ellen pulled him closer to her and for the third time in 24 hours held him while he sobbed.

Sue Ellen drove the car out of the gates of Southfork; she wanted to get them as far away as possible. For ten minutes she had held JR while he cried, she hated seeing him like that; she was also aware of the fact that Miss Ellie hadn't bothered to come out and check that JR was alright. Sue Ellen thought about what Miss Ellie had said to him and although she knew a lot of what was said was true it wasn't what a loving mother should have said to her son. She now understood why JR behaved the way he did…..he was deprived of love from both parents. She looked over at him…he seemed calmer.

"Hey where do you want to go" she said

JR looked at her "I don't care as long as it's away from this place" he said

"I promised Mark that I would go into Grayson's at some point today but until then I'm all yours" she smiled

JR grinned a wicked grin "Hmmm now there's an offer I can't refuse" he said "How about we find somewhere very, very private"

She looked at him and smiled "Glad to see you've cheered up a bit" she said

"Hey the thought of having you all to myself and thinking about what I'd like to do to you definitely put a smile on my face" he said "Let's go and find somewhere nice and quiet"

"You mean outside or back at the Condo?" Sue Ellen asked

"Hmmm, let's go for a walk around the park" JR said

Sue Ellen drove to the park and they got out of the car. "Place looks deserted" JR said

Hand in hand they walked along the path.

"Everything momma said this morning was true" JR said "I am incapable of love; I've cheated and abused you so many times, drove Cliff to attempt suicide and will destroy people who get in the way of what I want"

"JR…..look at the way you were brought up; how many times did Jock or Miss Ellie cuddle you or tell you they loved you? How often did they calm your fears after a bad nightmare?" Sue Ellen said "I saw it this morning….Miss Ellie's prime concern should have been making sure that you were okay but she didn't she was almost cold and I didn't like what she said to you"

"But she was only telling the truth" JR said

"Darling she may have been however she must have known that you were upset…god she just told you that the man you adored was not your father and yet she couldn't find a way to comfort you, tell you what you wanted to know" Sue Ellen said

JR began to speak but Sue Ellen placed her finger to his lips.

"Sweetheart we were in the car parked outside Southfork for ten minutes but she never even came outside to make sure you were okay…I just can't get over how cold and uncaring she was" she said

"Maybe it's my fault…perhaps I'm unworthy of love" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "Don't even go there" she said "Everyone is worthy of love including you; and I know you are capable of love I only have to watch you with our son"

They walked further along the park before deciding to take a rest by a tree.

"Hey you getting old on me" JR smiled as Sue Ellen rested her head on his shoulder

Sue Ellen gently punched him "No….just feel a bit tired…I guess it's the baby" she said

"Hey it's so beautiful out here today…it's really, really warm, so much nicer than being stuck in an office" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at him shocked "I don't believe I've just heard the great JR Ewing, business man, say that he's sooner be here than in his office working on another deal" she said

"Maybe since last night Ewing Oil doesn't seem that important…hey what do you think Cliff would say if I offered him half of it" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "I think he'd wonder what you were up to" she said

"I don't see the point in the Barnes-Ewing feud anymore…for the first time in my life I can see things from Digger's point of view" JR said "I mean it must have been painful watching momma and Jock…I mean I hated seeing you with Dusty at the Southern Cross ranch. Then to make matters worse Jock swindles him out of Ewing Oil…no wonder he became bitter"

Sue Ellen stroked his cheek and kissed him.

"What was that for?" JR asked

"Nothing…I just love you" she replied

"Sue Ellen, I'll tell you something else………I understand how Pam felt when she found out she wasn't Digger's daughter. It must have destroyed her…I remember how I ridiculed her for being the illegitimate daughter of a ranch hand…now I know how she feels" JR said

Sue Ellen held his hand tightly "JR…nothing has really changed. I do know what Miss Ellie meant when she said Jock was your father…he's the only father you've known" she said "However having said that I wished she hadn't done what she did because I know Digger would have treated you better than Jock ever did…you only have to look at his relationship with Cliff and Pam to see that. I know there were times when he wasn't around for them but they knew he loved them. Maybe if things had been different for you….I don't know just maybe you wouldn't find it so hard to show your feelings"

"I remember being four years old…shortly before Gary was born. Momma was really tired so Grandpa Southworth looked after me as Daddy was away a lot. Even then I was terrified of him. Anyway Grandpa used to let me help him when he was working on the ranch…I used to hold the tools for him while he mended the fence or something…silly little things like that. He taught me how to ride…I had my own pony even at that age and I loved being on the ranch with him….it wasn't until I was thrown from the horse while out with daddy that I developed a hatred for the animals. We used to get up early in the morning and ride out all morning checking on the cattle then in the afternoon he took me down to the lake and taught me how to fish. That was the only time I ever remember anyone taking an interest in me showing any affection. However when I was six things changed I was no longer allowed to go out with Grandpa..daddy said I had to learn the oil business" JR said "A short time after that Grandpa died….I remember when momma told me…I went upstairs to my room and cried….I knew I couldn't have cried in front of them as daddy would have told me real men don't cry"

"I can't imagine you working on the ranch…I mean I always thought it was Bobby who loved the ranch" Sue Ellen said

"I wasn't allowed to...the happiest time of my childhood was when Grandpa was alive and we'd do things together….he was big, strong but I was never afraid of him." JR said

"He loved you" Sue Ellen said "Did he ever read you bedtime stories?"

"Yeah….I used to ask him to read me scary stories…I remember one summer I think it was my fifth birthday…Grandpa and I had been out all day on the ranch and I begged him to let me camp out all night by the lake" JR said "Well Gary was only a few weeks old so momma was glad not to have a five year old running around the place…so she agreed. Grandpa and I set up camp by the lake….we had the campfire where we cooked the fish we caught and he taught me campfire songs then that night before I went to sleep he told me ghost stories. Anyway afterwards I settled down to sleep and everything was fine until I heard noises in the night… I remembered feeling scared so I woke Grandpa and he moved his sleeping bag closer to me and let me snuggle up against him…he talked to me, told me there was nothing to be afraid of and soon I was asleep"

"I know another little boy who would love to do that" Sue Ellen said

"Yeah…I'm hoping to take him fishing this summer and maybe we can go camping by the lake" JR said "How do you think he'll remember me in twenty years time?"

Sue Ellen thought for a moment; "As the father who loved him….helped him with his homework; read him stories…played with him in the pool" she said "Also the father who refused to let him leave school at six years old" she laughed

"He's not going to hate me for that is he?" JR asked

"No sweetheart…he's not, he only thinks he wants to leave school but I bet if you let him do that within six months he'd be wanting to go back" she replied

Sue Ellen looked over to the children's playground, it was empty, and looking at JR she said "Fancy a ride on the roundabout"

JR looked at her and grinned "Fancy a different sort of ride actually but the roundabout sounds good for now" he replied

JR stood up and taking Sue Ellen's hands pulled her up towards him. Arm in arm they walked over to the playground.

**Southfork**

Miss Ellie sat alone on the patio….she looked around her; seeing Southfork so empty made her sad. She remembered the days when Jock and Bobby were alive and how Southfork had been filled with people. Her mind went back to her conversation earlier with JR. She wished JR hadn't heard her confession to Clayton….it was a secret that she wanted so desperately to keep from him as she knew how much it would hurt him. However she couldn't understand why she had reacted the way she had towards him….he needed comforting; reassurance but she had pushed him away….told him that it was in the past and that he had no right to know about his father. What was it inside her that made her stop comforting JR…she knew that if it had been Gary she wouldn't have had any problem comforting him but JR was different. She didn't know what she felt for JR but she knew it wasn't the same as what she felt for Gary or Bobby….JR had never been an easy person to love. Her thoughts were interrupted by Clayton.

"Ellie…where is everyone?" he asked

"Sue Ellen and JR left shortly after breakfast….its been really quiet around here" she replied

"Was JR okay?" Clayton asked

Miss Ellie looked at him "We had an argument" she said

"What happened?" Clayton asked

"He…he wanted to know why I left Digger knowing I was pregnant with his child, and did I ever consider how he would feel. I told him it was in the past and Jock was his father…the only father he's ever known. JR got upset demanding to know about his real father" Miss Ellie replied

"Ellie it's only natural that he wants to know….this has been a shock for him" Clayton said

"Anyway I told him not to pretend to care about Digger's feeling…that he didn't care about anyone…he was incapable of love and used people to his own advantage" she said "He left soon afterwards…Sue Ellen followed him"

Clayton remained quiet listening to what she had to say.

"Clayton…I let him go knowing how much he was hurting. Sue Ellen was the one who went to comfort him not me. I should have been the one but I couldn't." she said "I'm not sure what I feel for him but its not the same as I feel for Bobby or Gary…if it had been one of them I would have reacted differently"

"JR isn't an easy person to like" Clayton said "Do you resent him because he's Digger's son and not Jock's; because Digger let you down"

"I've never really thought about it…but I've been sitting here thinking about his childhood and how I let Jock raise him….Clayton, Jock was hard on him…but I let him because I knew that while he was bullying JR he would leave Gary alone" Miss Ellie said "What sort of mother does that…I should have been more protective to JR"

"Ellie this is in the past….I'm sure once JR has got over the shock he will come to terms with things…everything will be okay" Clayton said

""I'm not so sure….after the way I treated him this morning I wouldn't blame him if he hated me" Miss Ellie said

**A Dallas Park**

After playing on the Roundabout and swings for a while; JR and Sue Ellen strolled around the park. JR held Sue Ellen close to him

"Hey that was fun!" he laughed

"I know" she said

"That's something else I have never really done…been allowed to play at the park. I remember how John Ross used to love the swings when he was tiny…in fact he'd scream the playground down if I removed him from them before he was ready. He's got a mind of his own that boy" JR said

"Like father; like son" Sue Ellen laughed

"Do you remember the day we took him to the adventure playground…I rode the roundabout with him…then let him chase me through the maze" JR said

"I remember…it was a perfect family day…even though we were divorced" she said

"I was just so happy that the three of us were together even if it was for only a short time" JR said

"You wanted me to go back to Southfork with you but I couldn't…part of me was so scared that I might start falling in love with you again" she said "So what do you want to do now?"

JR laughed "You should know never to ask me that question….I've got the most beautiful girl in the world standing before me and you ask what I want to do" he said "What do you think?"

Sue Ellen laughed "So glad you're feeling better" she said "How about we get some lunch and then go over to Grayson's'"

JR pulled her towards him and kissed her passionately, holding her tightly. If the truth was know she wanted him as much as he wanted her…she wanted to wipe away the pain of earlier…but she wasn't sure how far she could go out in the open, where they might get caught.

"Sue Ellen I need you" JR moaned

"Let's go somewhere else" Sue Ellen replied

JR took her hand and put it against his crotch "There's no time….I want you now?"

"God JR where?" she said "We're in a children's playground"

JR looked around him desperately searching for somewhere private. He spied some trees in the distance surrounded by a few bushes…it looked reasonably safe and private.

"Come on" He said as he took her hand

They ran across the park into the area; JR looked around him; he thought it looked safe enough. Taking Sue Ellen in his arms he kissed her, with one hand he began to move his way down her body finding her skirt his hand reached underneath it to where her panties were. He heard Sue Ellen's breathing increased…he knew he was getting to her. He pushed her panties aside and slid two fingers between her folds, finding her love button he gently stroked it. Suddenly Sue Ellen gently pushed him away.

"JR I'm sorry I can't not here" she said. Looking in his eyes she saw a look of hurt "Sweetheart I love you I just can't do this out here; it's a children's playground for God's sake"

JR pulled her to him "Later then" He said

She smiled "You better believe it" she said

Hand in hand they walked back to the car. JR opened the car door for Sue Ellen and before she got in she kissed him. They drove into town to have some lunch before going into Grayson's Research. They spent a couple of hours looking over arrangements for a Charity Ball which would be held during the fall. JR suggested using his contacts to get funding. Finally it was time to pick up John Ross from school and go home.

"I don't want to go home yet" JR said as they sat in the car waiting for John Ross

Sue Ellen reached for his hand "We have to go back sometime" she smiled

"I know but why don't we have dinner in town" he replied

"Okay!" she said

After enjoying dinner in town and a movie the family returned to the ranch. Sue Ellen glanced at JR and knew by the look on his face that he was nervous about going home. She reached over and squeezed his hand. They had finally booked their holiday and would be leaving Dallas at the weekend; Mark had said he would speak to Pam about Christopher and he invited them to dinner the following evening to make arrangements. She knew JR would be pleased to get away from Southfork. As they parked the car Sue Ellen noticed Clayton sitting out on the patio on his own. The three of them got out of the car.

"Sweetheart why don't you and daddy go upstairs…I just want to talk to Clayton" she said to John Ross

"Okay momma….daddy I'll race you upstairs" he said

"No you walk upstairs young man" His mother replied

Sue Ellen looked at JR and kissed him "It will be okay"

JR and John Ross said 'Hello' to Clayton before going inside. Sue Ellen went and sat opposite him.

"Hey" she said "Is everything okay?"

Clayton nodded "How's JR?" he asked

Sue Ellen looked towards the house before answering "He's okay…still a bit upset" she said

"He doesn't know how lucky he is to have you" Clayton said

"Where's Miss Ellie?" Sue Ellen said

"She had a migraine so she went to bed early" Clayton replied

"Have you two had an argument?" Sue Ellen asked

"Not as such….she told me what happened this morning….how she wouldn't tell JR anything about Digger" Clayton said "Sue Ellen she practically told me she didn't love her own son"

"What" Sue Ellen said

"She told me that when she saw how upset JR was she felt nothing and yet if it had been either Bobby or Gary instead of JR she wouldn't have hesitated going to comfort them. She also told me that she allowed Jock to bully JR because she knew Jock would leave Gary alone" Clayton said "I can't believe she feels nothing for her own son"

"Clayton JR's always known that he's second best….I think he grew up feeling unloved which is why he is the way he is" Sue Ellen said

"But he's her son…he's deserves her love however he behaves but he doesn't have that" Clayton said

"JR is okay…he has a wife and son who love him and will never stop loving him" she said "We spent the whole day together, mostly talking…then we picked up John Ross from school and had dinner and a movie. John Ross sat on his daddy's lap the entire movie…he knows something's wrong with JR and he wanted to comfort him"

"I couldn't imagine not loving my child" Clayton said "Even after Dusty decided he wanted to live a life of a cowboy I still loved him"

Sue Ellen placed her hand on Clayton "I know" she said "Things will be okay….I will help JR through this even if his mother wont"

Clayton sighed "I don't think she wanted to face JR tonight" he said

Sue Ellen smiled "I'm going upstairs to check on my husband and son…don't stay up to late" she said

Kissing him on the cheek, she made her way inside the house. She walked upstairs to John Ross' room and smiled when she saw JR and his son curled up on the bed reading a book. She went over and kissed John Ross' forehead.

"Hey it's time to go to sleep" she said

"Momma do I have to" John Ross complained

"Yes you do" JR replied "Don't forget we're going on holiday at the weekend"

"Yeah….I get to finish school early" John Ross shouted

"But now it's time for bed…goodnight sweetheart…I love you" Sue Ellen said

"I love you too" John Ross said

"Night partner…love you" JR said

"Love you too daddy" His son replied

JR and Sue Ellen joined hands and walked out of their son's room turning off the light as they went. On entering their room Sue Ellen threw her arms around him and hugged him tightly.

"Hey what's that for" JR laughed

"I love you" she said "Never ever forget that"

"Momma wasn't downstairs…is everything okay with her and Clayton?" JR asked

"I think so…she just has a migraine" Sue Ellen replied

"Oh" JR said

"Fancy a shower" Sue Ellen said "And then we can finish what we almost started in the park"

JR smiled "That is a very good idea!"

After finishing their shower they climbed into bed together. JR pulled her closer and kissed her. Sue Ellen smiled and began kissing her way down his body…making sure that she left no part untouched. Finally she found what she wanted she took him in her mouth, JR sighed and closed his eyes.

"I love it when you do that" he said

Sue Ellen carried on with what she was doing; she wanted to make him happy tonight she was going to do everything in her power to make him feel loved. Feeling him harden in her mouth she worked her way back up his body and slipped him inside her. Moving slowly they began to make love. Finding their rhythm they increased the speed of their action until they reached the height of their passion. Finally they began to relax holding each other in a tight embrace. JR looked at Sue Ellen and was concerned to see tears in her eyes.

"What's wrong" he asked

"Nothing….I'm just happy….I love you so much" she said "This is all I ever wanted…you are all I ever wanted" she said

JR smiled "I love you too" he said "And I've finally got what I've always wanted…you"

Sue Ellen smiled and held him tightly. She thought back to what Clayton has said Miss Ellie had told him. Part of her felt sad that Miss Ellie had actually admitted not caring about JR the way she cared about Gary or Bobby, however she also knew that she was going to make things right for JR and give him all the love that he was deprived of as a child. She was going to build the perfect future for them.

JR woke early the next morning; he turned towards the window to see the sun shining through the curtains, he then looked at the bedside clock, it was 6.30am. He turned back to Sue Ellen and watched her sleep; gently he ran his hands down her body, stopping at her stomach and smiling at the thought of the new life growing inside her. He pulled her closer to him. He thought back to yesterday and how she had comforted him, held him while he cried and sat listening to him reminisce about his childhood; never once did she appeared bored or get annoyed with him. He felt her move slightly and kissed her; she opened her eyes and looked at him.

"Good morning" she said

JR smiled and kissed her "Good morning" he replied

"Are you okay?" she asked kissing him

"I think so" he said

Sue Ellen looked into his eyes "What's going on in that head of yours?" she asked

"I was just thinking about yesterday" JR said "I don't think I could have made it without you"

Sue Ellen smiled "That's what I'm here for" she said

"I'm so lucky to have you" he said "I don't know anyone else who would sit and listen to me like you do."

Sue Ellen laughed "Clayton said the same thing to me last night!" she said

"What was wrong last night, Clayton didn't seem very happy" JR said

"Miss Ellie had a migraine….I think he was just worried about her" Sue Ellen said

JR looked at her….he knew she was keeping something from him.

"Sue Ellen, what did he really say?" JR asked

Sue Ellen kissed him "Sweetheart…I told you he's just worried about Miss Ellie" she said

She looked into his eyes; she didn't want to tell him what Clayton had really said; she knew how much it would hurt him.

"Did momma tell him about Digger?" JR asked

"No" Sue Ellen said

"But they had an argument…I could tell by the look on his face. He wasn't happy about something" JR said "Tell me what he told you"

"Some things are better left unsaid" she replied

JR sighed Tell me" he said

"Okay" she said "Clayton found her sitting alone after we left….she……….."

"What happened?" JR asked

"She told him that she knew she should have told you about Digger and found a way to comfort you but she couldn't" Sue Ellen said

"And let me guess the rest….she told him that she'd have had no problem if it had been Bobby or Gary instead of me" JR said

"JR I'm sorry" Sue Ellen said

"Hey, it's not your fault" JR smiled "Let's face it we both know that I have always been second best"

"I think Clayton was just shocked by her attitude" Sue Ellen said

"I remember how she used to protect Gary….if daddy yelled at him or anything she would always put herself in the middle of them and yet when it came to me she let him do whatever he wanted…..he was allowed to bully me…make me look small and she never came to my defense" JR said "I guess that's one of the reasons I don't like Gary because although he was terrified of daddy he always had momma's protection whereas I had nowhere to hide"

"What about Bobby?" Sue Ellen asked

"Bobby was the youngest. The blue-eyed boy; I can't recall daddy raising his voice to him once even after he married Pam. Although he had a temper like daddy. I remember when I was about seventeen I pinched his diary and took it to the treehouse to read. I mean it couldn't be that secret…he was seven years old, however when he realized what I'd done he threatened to kill me if I didn't give it him back. I mean I was twice the size of him" JR said

"Sweetheart if you ever read my diary I will kill you!" she laughed

"I didn't know you kept a diary" JR replied "Where do you keep it and what have you got written in it"

"Wouldn't you like to know" she said "A lot of things; emotions, thoughts, experiences…you name it I've got it written down"

"Why do people do that?" JR asked

"I don't know" Sue Ellen replied "Maybe it's about history…I mean one day my granddaughter could find it hidden in an attic and learn more about her grandparents"

"JR grimaced "I hope not, I dread to think what you've got in there about me" he said

Sue Ellen laughed "Don't worry some of it is good" she said

JR looked at her "Everything was perfect wasn't it; just when you think you've finally got everything you wanted something comes along and destroys it" he said

Sue Ellen cuddled closer to him "JR everything is perfect, we've got each other, our son and a new baby on the way and in a few days we're going on holiday together for the first time in ages" she said

"We should have left the children home" JR joked "There wont be much chance for romance"

"I never realized you were a romantic" she replied "However we'll have to make sure we tire them out so they have to go to bed early each night…then we will have time to ourselves"

"John Ross seems so happy lately…I look at him and all the sadness that used to be in his eyes has gone….he's even looking forward to the baby" JR said

"He has what he's always wanted….two parents who love each other" Sue Ellen said "I was watching him last night while we were at the movies….he knew you were upset about something…he sat on your lap all night long, stroking your face and occasionally kissing your cheek"

"Oh was that him, I thought it was you" JR said

JR I'm shocked…you mean to tell me that you can't tell the difference between when I kiss you and our son kisses you!" she said

"Mmmm I think I need a little bit of a reminder" JR said pulling Sue Ellen closer to him.

"JR we need to get up" she laughed

JR planted soft kisses on her face, His hands worked there way down her body stopping at her stomach. Gently he caressed it. Sue Ellen watched him and placed her hand on top of his. She noticed he had tears in his eyes

"What's wrong?" she asked

"This is what I have wanted for so long…..another baby with you I can't believe we did it" he replied

Sue Ellen smiled "We sure did….by Christmas we'll have two children to look after" she said

"Are you still suffering with morning sickness" He asked

"No; funnily enough I'm not…I just feel hungry most of the time" she said "This is so different from when I was expecting John Ross…I think I was sick every morning for about five months"

JR looked at the clock and sighed "I guess we should get up and have breakfast. I'm hoping to get to work before momma's up" he said

"And I thought you wanted to spend some more time with me" Sue Ellen laughed "See it's not even 7.30 am and you're thinking about Ewing Oil"

"Ahem, Ewing Oil is the last thing on my mind but I just don't want another confrontation like yesterday. Let's face it she's not going to tell me anything about Digger." He said

"I know….I was joking beside I've got to go into Grayson's today…I feel guilty because I haven't been around much for a few weeks and now we're going on holiday" she said

"Do you think Mark will let me help you organize the next ball….I could use my contacts and see if we can't find a way to get a venue for free!" JR said

"I'm sure he will" Sue Ellen said

They got up; showered and went to get John Ross. As they walked out onto the patio JR noticed that his mother and Clayton were already eating breakfast.

"Great" JR whispered to Sue Ellen

She gripped his hand tightly "Just relax" she said

They walked out onto the patio hand in hand, John Ross ran in front of them. After fixing themselves something to eat they went and sat down.

"Hi Miss Ellie, Clayton How are you today" Sue Ellen asked

"Fine" Miss Ellie replied

JR didn't say a word he just continued eating his breakfast.

"Daddy will you take me to school today" John Ross asked

JR looked at his son and smiled "Of course I can…hurry up and eat your breakfast then we'll make a move"

"In a hurry to get to the office JR" Miss Ellie asked

"Yeah well I have a few things to sort out before we go on holiday" he replied

"When are you going?" Miss Ellie asked "And how long are you going for"

"We're leaving on Sunday for three weeks" JR said

"That's great" Miss Ellie said "Gary phoned me last night saying that he was going to come down to Dallas to take the blood test…I think I'll phone him and tell him to bring the family down for a couple of weeks"

Sue Ellen felt anger welling up inside her. Did Miss Ellie really have to make it so obvious how much she preferred Gary? She glanced at JR who was busy looking at his breakfast.

Suddenly JR got up from the table "I'm not really hungry I'm going to get ready for work" he said "John Ross we leave in ten minutes okay buddy"

"Yes daddy" John Ross replied

Sue Ellen watched JR walk away; there was so much she wanted to say but now was not the time, not with John Ross at the table. She quietly got up and went inside the house.

"What's wrong with those two?" Miss Ellie asked Clayton. Clayton looked at her and shook his head; he really didn't have an answer for her.

Sue Ellen found JR in the den piling some papers into his briefcase, his back turned towards her. She walked up to him putting her arms around his waist and kissing his neck. JR turned to face her and kissed her.

"Are you nearly ready to go?" JR asked

"Listen sweetheart….why don't you take John Ross and I'll take my car, there are a few things I would like to discuss with you mother" Sue Ellen replied

"Sue Ellen don't start an argument it's not worth it" JR said "She'll probably throw us both of the ranch"

"I'm not going to start anything" Sue Ellen replied "I just want to let her know a few home truths"

JR laughed "It must be the pregnancy you're like a lioness protecting her cubs" he said

"No, I'm a wife who doesn't like seeing her husband hurt" she replied "I love you so much"

"I love you too" He said

"So do you want meet me for lunch" Sue Ellen asked

"I'd sooner have you for lunch" JR laughed

Sue Ellen smiled at him; she knew he was still hurting but today he seemed more in control of his emotions.

"How about I make us a picnic lunch and we find somewhere private to eat it in the park" Sue Ellen said

"Sounds good to me as long as I can have you for dessert" he replied

Sue Ellen kissed him…at this precise moment she wanted him so badly but she knew they had to get their son to school.

"Let me go and get our son ready" she said

Letting go off him she wandered back outside, telling John Ross to get ready for school. Clayton looked at her and said

"What are your plans for today?"

"I'm going into work, then meeting JR for lunch and then tonight we're having dinner with Pam and Mark" she replied

Clayton stood up and went to kiss her on the cheek "Well have a good day" he said

"You too" she replied

Ten minutes later JR and John Ross had left in his car leaving Miss Ellie and Sue Ellen alone on the patio.

"Sue Ellen I honestly don't know what JR's problem is" she said

Sue Ellen closed her eyes and counted to ten before she said anything. "He's slightly upset with what you said to him yesterday" she replied

"I told him the truth…as far as I'm concerned Digger is in the past…….." she said

"And you don't think that JR has a right to know about his father" Sue Ellen said

"No Jock was his father….a better father than Digger would ever have been" Miss Ellie replied

"You never gave Digger a chance" Sue Ellen said

"Sue Ellen…after all the things JR has done to you why do you still care about him" Miss Ellie asked

"Because I love him more than anything…because he's the father of my child and because I can understand why he behaves like he does" she replied

Miss Ellie laughed "You're deluding yourself, five months from now he will have found someone else" she said "He's incapable of love and commitment; I gave up on him a long time ago"

"I know you did….you let Jock bring him up; bully him knowing that while JR was being bullied by his father Gary was safe. Neither Jock or you showed JR any affection as a child and you wonder why he turned out the way he did" Sue Ellen said

"Jock was a good father, he taught him everything he knows" Miss Ellie said

"Sure he did but he never loved him; he never hugged him; told him stories, comforted him when he was hurt… JR told me of the day he went riding with Jock…how his horse got scared and he was thrown off it. He was hurt pretty bad but Jock told him to grow up and went after the horse. Have you seen JR with his son; the way he plays with him; helps him with his homework…reads him stories. JR is doing everything he can to ensure that John Ross has the father he wanted to have…that his son knows that he is loved" Sue Ellen said

"We both know that Jock was never any good at showing his feelings" Miss Ellie said

"Please…..he never had any problems where Bobby was concerned…He built the treehouse for him. I never heard him bully Bobby or call him a 'Jackass' almost everyday the way he did JR" Sue Ellen said "He told me yesterday about his grandfather, how he used to follow him around when he was little…how much he cried when he died"

"JR has never cried over anyone in his life!" Miss Ellie said

"How do you know…were you ever there to wipe away his tears or were you just too busy attending to Gary's needs" Sue Ellen said

"Gary needed me more than JR" Miss Ellie replied

Sue Ellen felt her anger rising. JR needed her as much as Gary did but she failed to see that. How could a mother fail to see her child's needs?

"JR was always second best he knew that and he lived with it and I couldn't believe what you did this morning. You knew that JR was upset this morning but you sounded delighted at the fact that we were going away and you could have your precious Gary home again" Sue Ellen said

"I hardly ever see him thanks to JR" Miss Ellie said

Sue Ellen stood up. "Don't worry about JR, I'll look after him; I'll give him all the love he's been denied over the years and we'll both make sure that our children know how special they are" she said "Goodbye Miss Ellie I've got to get to work"

Miss Ellie watched her go. Sue Ellen was so wrong; she knew her son and JR was incapable of having emotions; it wouldn't be long before he was cheating on Sue Ellen again.

**Ben Stiver's room**

Ben lay on his bed staring at the ceiling; for the past few days he had been stuck watching these four walls unable to go out; not wanting another confrontation with either JR or Clayton. Finally he made a decision; he had to get out of this place, leave Southfork and Dallas for good; he should never have come back…it wasn't as if he had a family here anymore but first he needed to leave a letter for Miss Ellie.

**Grayson's Research**

Sue Ellen sat at her desk trying to organize dates for the next fundraiser; she wanted another ball, that always seemed the best way to fundraise; people loved to eat and dance. She also needed to get companies to donate items which she could auction. Her mind was set on an late August/Early September date and with her holiday looming she didn't have much time left. Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the door.

"Sue Ellen, welcome back" Mark said as he closed the door.

"Hi…I'm not here for long. I'm off on holiday on Sunday" she laughed

"And taking my stepson with you" Mark said "Are you two sure you want two boys running around"

"Well we're not leaving John Ross at home and we thought Christopher would keep him company" Sue Ellen said "Beside it will give you and Pam some time alone"

"How does JR feel about leaving Ewing Oil for so long" Mark asked "I mean I thought that man was married to the company"

"We both feel that time away would be good….there are things going on at the moment that we need a break from" Sue Ellen replied

"Everything is okay between you" Mark asked

"We're fine" she replied "Do you still want us to come over for dinner tonight"

"Well Pam wants you to come over but she's not sure about JR" Mark said "Her and JR don't exactly get on and she's worried that he might try and spoil what could be a nice evening"

"I can promise you he will be on his best behavior" she said

"I'll believe you" Mark laughed "I'll let you get on with your work..how is it going?"

"Fine…I figured we could hold the fundraiser late August/early September" she said

"Okay" Mark said as he got up from his chair and walked towards the door.

Five minutes later the telephone rang. Sue Ellen sighed and picked it up

"Sue Ellen!" she heard her mother's voice say

"Momma, hi where are you?" she asked

"I've just moved back to Dallas" she said "I hope it's alright phoning you here, I didn't want to call Southfork"

"Yes momma its fine…when did you finish your cruise?" Sue Ellen asked

"Last night…I got back late" her mother replied "I was wondering if you and John Ross could come over for dinner. Its ages since I've seen you"

"Momma…we'd love to but we're going to Pam and Mark's tonight and on Sunday we're going on holiday" Sue Ellen said

"How about tomorrow" she said

"That sounds okay….momma is it alright if JR comes too" Sue Ellen said

"Are you two back together" Her mother asked

"Yes" Sue Ellen said "And this time it's for good. We've got some good news for you too"

"Okay…I'll see you tomorrow and you can give me all the details of what's been happening while I've been away" Her mother said "Goodbye darling"

"Bye momma" Sue Ellen said

**Southfork**

Clayton had been working on the ranch alone all day long; Ray had gone to a cattle auction which Clayton should have gone to but with things the way they were with Ben Stivers he didn't want to leave Southfork at this present time. He walked up to the house for some lunch and found Miss Ellie sitting alone.

"Hello" He said

"Hello Clayton..you look tired" she said

"Yeah, it's hot out there, I've just come to get some lunch" he said

"I phone Gary and he's coming to stay for three weeks while JR and Sue Ellen are away; so maybe he can help you on the ranch" Miss Ellie said

"I wish you hadn't done that" Clayton said

"He's my son…..I want to see him; I haven't even seen the twins since they were born" Miss Ellie said

"But did you have to make it sound so obvious that you were pleased that JR and Sue Ellen were going away" Clayton said

"I did not" Miss Ellie replied

"You did" Clayton said

"Clayton JR will get over this" Miss Ellie said

"He's hurting even I can see that and just for once it would be nice to see you show some concern for him. For god's sake you've just told him that Jock wasn't his father. Do you really think that doesn't bother him" Clayton said "It's about time you concentrated on your eldest son for once."

Miss Ellie sighed "I'm fed up hearing about JR's needs. We all know that he's selfish and arrogant. Look at what he's done to people who get in his way. Believe me he has no feelings and don't let this little act of playing at being happily in love with Sue Ellen fool you because it wont last" she said

"What if he decided to move away" Clayton said

"He wont…he enjoys living at Southfork too much" Miss Ellie said

"Aren't you worried about losing your son" Clayton asked

"I let go off JR years ago. I told you yesterday I don't have the same feelings for him as I did for Bobby or Gary. If he does decide to leave Southfork than maybe Gary would come back and live here" she replied

Clayton shook his head; there was no used talking to Miss Ellie the mood she was in.

"I'm going into the kitchen to make a sandwich…do you want anything" He asked

"No thank you" she replied

**A Dallas Park**

JR and Sue Ellen found a secluded area to have their private picnic.

"How was your morning?" Sue Ellen asked

"Fine" JR said "Wondering whether to get out of Dallas and relocate"

Sue Ellen looked at him "Don't do anything to hasty" she said "Beside my mother phoned me earlier and she's moved back to Dallas"

"That's it I'm definitely moving" JR laughed

"She's invited us to dinner tomorrow" Sue Ellen said

JR groaned "What the three of us or just you and John Ross" he said

Sue Ellen laughed "You don't get out of it that easily" she said "Beside you've got a choice…have dinner with your mother or mine"

"I think momma's going to be busy…killing the fatted calf as the prodigal son's coming home" JR said

"I had a chat with her this morning. I tried to get her to see things from your point of view but she just wasn't interested. She told me I was deluding myself in thinking that you would remain faithful to me" Sue Ellen said "she can't see that her and Jock may have been responsible for the way you turned out; she doesn't think you have any feelings at all"

"Sue Ellen that's why I was thinking maybe a new start somewhere else would be good for us. I mean I could try and talk Clayton into selling me the Southern Cross, we could relocate Ewing Oil up there" JR said

"Are you going to keep Ewing Oil, I mean you were talking about letting Cliff come in with you" Sue Ellen said

JR laughed "I can't see that working, but the war between the Barnes Ewings is over as far as I'm concerned. I will leave him alone if he leaves me alone" he said "I might even consider changing the name of Ewing Oil"

"What to" Sue Ellen asked

"I don't know but I was thinking about it this morning. I've put so much work into that company and I want to leave it as a legacy to my children" he said

"Okay let's talk about this later…right now I'm hungry" Sue Ellen said

"You've just eaten" JR laughed

Sue Ellen kissed him "For you" she said

"Sue Ellen we're in a children's playground" JR laughed reminding her of her words from yesterday.

Sue Ellen's hand went down to his crotch "So you don't want me" she said as she stroked him.

JR kissed her passionately. "You know I do" he said

Sue Ellen stood up and looked around; everything seemed quiet there appeared to be noone around.

"What are you waiting for" she said

JR undid the belt of his trousers and lowered them and his boxers. He then pulled Sue Ellen on top of him. Sue Ellen kissed him as his hand went under her skirt trying to find her panties. Sue Ellen let him remove them and looked at him.

"I love you" she said as she began to undo his shirt buttons, she then began kissing his chest. Sue Ellen gasped as JR entered her, loving the feel of him inside of her; connecting with her so that they were one body. Together they move, first slowly and gently, their mouths finding each other their tongues connecting. As their passion became stronger they increased their rhythmn until both of them reached the point of ecstacy, their hearts beating fast but in time with each other. Finally they began to relax. JR held her close to him. Sue Ellen's hand found it's way back to his manhood and she gently stroked him.

"I can't wait to do that to you on a beach" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "Laying underneath the stars while the children are sleeping peacefully in the beach house. This holiday is going to be perfect…only four more days" she said

"I could stay here all day long having you do that to me" JR said as she continued stroking him.

Sue Ellen kissed him "Unfortunately we both have to go back to work" she said

"Sue Ellen one more time please" JR said

"I love it when you beg" she said as she climbed on top of him and guided him inside her. They made love again; each time felt better than the last and each time deepened their love for each other. When they had finished they lay silent for a couple of minutes before getting dressed. Sue Ellen had brought her car so she dropped JR back at Ewing Oil; JR told her he would pick up John Ross and be back at Southfork by 4.30pm. They were both looking forward to spending an evening away from Southfork.

**Southfork**

Sue Ellen arrived back at Southfork at 4pm to find JR and John Ross playing in the pool. Getting out of the car she walked over to them.

"Hey you two….what are you doing home so early" she said

"Well I was going to take John Ross back to Ewing Oil but we decided to come home and play in the pool" he said

"Anyone else around?" she asked

"Clayton's inside somewhere…but haven't seen momma" JR replied

"Don't stay in there too long" she said "We're going out tonight"

Sue Ellen watched them for a while then went inside to find Clayton.; she found him sitting in the kitchen nursing what looked like a cold cup of coffee.

"Hey, do you want a refill?" she asked

Clayton turned and looked at her "I didn't hear you come in" he replied

"You were deep in thought….no prizes for guessing what's on your mind" she said as she went about making some more coffee. After making the coffee she went and sat opposite Clayton.

"Miss Ellie not around?" she asked

"Haven't seen her since lunch time" Clayton said "I did go to see if she was at Bobby's grave but she isn't…….I feel I'm losing her, I can't seem to connect with her these days. I find myself increasingly unable to understand her actions."

"I tried to talk to her this morning but she just put the barriers up when I tried talking about JR" Sue Ellen said

"This family is falling apart and there's not a damn thing I can do about it" Clayton said "JR asked me if I would sell him the Southern Cross"

"I knew that was coming up…he asked my opinion on it today" Sue Ellen said "He feels that maybe that what Miss Ellie wants….him off Southfork and Gary back here where he belong,. What did you tell him?"

"I told him that I'd think about it and for him to do the same while he was on holiday and if at the end of that time he still wanted to buy it then I'd consider it" Clayton said "But I'd sooner have you nearby especially with the baby….I want to make sure you're okay"

"Clayton I'm fine" she said "At the moment I'm more concerned about you and JR"

"I'm fine" Clayton said "Mind you I was concerned about JR this afternoon. When John Ross saw me this afternoon he called me 'Granpa' and JR never corrected him."

"Clayton…you're the nearest thing he has to a grandfather" Sue Ellen said "You've known him since he was two years old. You're married to his grandmother which makes you his grandfather"

"I was just surprised that JR didn't make a comment" Clayton said "I told Ellie this morning that I thought she was wrong when she told JR that she was inviting Gary here while you two were away. She made it so obvious that she'd sooner have him here"

"I know I told her that myself but she told me that it was because of JR that she never sees Gary" Sue Ellen said

"I asked her if she resented JR because she knew he was Digger's and Digger had let her down" Clayton said "But she didn't reply"

"I wish she had made a go of it with Digger; I think JR would have turned out differently. I mean from the age of six JR's life has been nothing but Ewing Oil. JR told me about a time when Gary was having a birthday party and he wanted to stay with the other children but Jock told him he had to work. Also there was a time when he fell of his horse while out riding with Jock; he hurt himself badly but Jock just told him to grow up and went after the horse. Miss Ellie told me he was arrogant, selfish and unloveable but what does she expect given the childhood he had. I think the only person who showed him any affection was his grandfather and he died when JR was six" Sue Ellen said "If someone has never been shown love how can they ever give love to anyone"

"JR loves you" Clayton said "And John Ross"

"He's learning" Sue Ellen said "We've come so far this last year and finally I think we can make this marriage work"

"I hope so….you've been hurt too many times by that man" Clayton said "I've been watching you with him these past few days; when Ellie told him about Digger and this morning at breakfast and it reminded me of how you supported Dusty when you came to the Southern Cross."

"When JR is vulnerable I tend to melt….I don't know why I just do. At the moment I just feel the need to protect him. With regard to Dusty it drove him mad when I used to fuss over him. I sometimes wonder if that's why he started doing the rodeo circuit again to prove that he didn't need me; that he was capable of being the man he was" Sue Ellen said "Have you heard from him lately?"

Clayton laughed "Not since he left here" he replied "We just seem so far apart….I know he loves the rodeo and will never settle down which is why I need to consider what I'm going to do about the Southern Cross as I know he wont want it"

"It's good to hear you talk like that….it means you consider this your home" Sue Ellen said

"I'm not sure for how long though" Clayton said "I'm still not convinced that if Ben Stivers is Jock, Ellie wont take him back"

Sue Ellen frowned "I sincerely hope she doesn't. I mean the man walked out of her life four years ago without a word, I know how heartbroken she was when he 'died'" she said

"What was Jock Ewing like?" Clayton asked

Sue Ellen thought for a moment "Where do I start?" she said "I supposed he loved his family in his own way…which is why I can't see Ben Stivers as Jock. However he could be arrogant…overbearing. He didn't believe that the Ewing Women should work…when Pam said she wanted to work in a store he nearly had a heart attack. Mostly what I remember is his treatment of JR. He bullied him, JR never stood up to him..it was always 'Yes sir, no sir'. Jock created a monster to be honest….at one time there would be nothing JR wouldn't do to get what he wanted….that includes destroying people…Jock told him the most important things in life was power and money..without them you were worthless."

"Do you think JR's change or has he still got that drive in him" Clayton asked

Sue Ellen sighed "I hope so….I don't think he's got the ambition he did when he was trying to prove himself to Jock, now he'll do stupid things like get involved with Angelica Nero but I think…I hope he's past destroying people to get what he wants" she said "I'm hoping that when this new baby comes he'll want to spend more time with us than Ewing Oil"

"He seems to be enjoying John Ross' company" Clayton said "I was surprised when they arrived home at 3.30pm"

"I knew JR was going to pick him up but I presumed he was going to go back to the office with him" Sue Ellen said "The one thing I've always know is that JR loves his son; and he will do anything for him"

"I wish we could sort out this problem between him and Ellie….she's just being so stubborn, not wanting to discuss it with anyone and I'm not convinced she doesn't feel anything for JR" Clayton said

"What makes you say that?" Sue Ellen asked

"Last night when I went up to bed, she was still awake looking through old pictures….the ones I noticed were all of JR as a baby" He replied

"You sure it was JR" Sue Ellen said

"I picked some up to have a look and took a glance at the back, it was his name written on them" Clayton said "I don't understand why she's saying she doesn't love him when she does…I can understand that perhaps she doesn't like him at times but I can't believe that she doesn't love him"

"Maybe this holiday will be good for her and for JR; it will give them some time apart and it will also give her a chance to see Gary and his family; then when we come back maybe I can talk to her again" Sue Ellen said

"I'm going the Southern Cross next week…I need to check the place over" Clayton said

"Have you told her?" Sue Ellen asked

Clayton laughed "No, figured she'd be too busy with Gary to care" he said

Sue Ellen put her hand over his "Clayton we'll get through this somehow…I don't want to lose you" she said "You're the nearest thing I have to a father…you've been there for me so many times….after the divorce…through the drinking you've been the one constant thing I know I could rely on..I love you"

Clayton smiled "Thanks, I know I have your support" he said

"Damn I wish we weren't going to Pam and Mark's tonight…I hate leaving you like this" Sue Ellen said

"Don't worry about me I'll be fine beside Ellie should be back at some point" Clayton replied "And I've got a crib to make for my new grandchild"

"That reminds me I've got a pre-natal check up tomorrow which I haven't told JR about yet" Sue Ellen said

"Will he go with you?" Clayton asked

Sue Ellen smiled "I should think so; this time he wants to take an active part in this pregnancy…..last time we made so many mistakes…I don't think there was a day I was sober throughout the pregnancy and John Ross was two months premature…we were so lucky he was okay we could have lost him" she said

"He seems fine now…he's growing so fast" Clayton said "It doesn't seem that long ago that you brought him to the Southern Cross; he was so tiny back then"

"I know which reminds me I better go and get those boys out of the pool and ready for dinner" she laughed, she stood up and went to kiss Clayton on the cheek

"See you soon" she said

"Bye…go and enjoy yourself" he replied

Sue Ellen walked out onto the patio, she smiled seeing JR and John Ross in the pool.

"Hey guys it's time to get ready for dinner" she said

"Mom it's not five o'clock yet….please give us some more time" John Ross said

Sue Ellen rolled her eyes and looked at JR; both of them could wrap her round their fingers "Okay half an hour but no more" she said

**A Dallas cemetery**

Miss Ellie sat on a bench quietly reflecting on the events of the past few days. She knew she had been hard on JR….in fact she had been downright cruel to him if she was honest with herself but she didn't know what to do to correct that. Both JR and Sue Ellen hated her at this moment….she had seen look of disgust in Sue Ellen's eyes this morning. Slowly she walked over to the gravestone and knelt before it. She hadn't been here for years….not since the funeral but something compelled her to come here today. For some reason she needed to be here. Gently she placed her hand on the gravestone running her fingers along the nameplate. Lowering her head she began to weep….weep for her one true love…the man she would have dearly loved to have spent the rest of her life with…..the man who kept letting her down time after time…the man she had deprived of knowing his own son. Her thoughts turned to JR….why had she lied to Clayton telling him that she didn't feel for JR what she felt for Bobby and Gary….maybe because part of it had been true but not the way she made it sound. She loved JR more than anything but something inside her had made her distant towards him….she couldn't let Jock see her favor him more than Bobby or Gary, so she had favored Gary instead; surrendering the upbringing of JR to Jock, letting him take care of Digger's son. Part of her had been so scared that Jock might one day learn the truth that she rejected her own son. Sue Ellen had reminded her of the day her father died; telling her how JR had cried but there had been noone there to comfort him; that wasn't true….Ellie had been outside his door for ten minutes listening to his sobs but something stopped her going to comfort him. She had tried to protect JR by being a distant mother….it didn't make sense but she thought it was for the best. She wished she had done things differently….she hated what Jock had turned JR into……a cold unfeeling man that would stop at nothing to get what he wanted….in the beginning that was how she had seen Jock…now it was how she saw her son; and yet lately she had seen something else in him...a gentler more human side to him the way he was lovingly looking after Sue Ellen during this pregnancy….the gentle way he touched her….the look of love shining in his eyes when he spoke to her….she was in no doubt that JR would make their marriage work this time. Her thoughts turned to John Ross as she remembered the day they spent at the adventure playground…..JR going on all the rides with John Ross even though by the end of it he was feeling ill……it almost reminded her of the gentle side of Digger. The tears fell faster now….she loved JR he was all she had of Digger and she didn't want to lose him but these past few days she had pushed him away; rejected him and hurt him. She needed to put things right, she knew that. She put her face closer to the gravestone and kissed the nameplate. For the first time in years she felt close to Digger again. Finally she got up….she needed to go home…she needed to talk to Clayton.

**Southfork**

An hour later Sue Ellen had got John Ross bathed and into his clothes ready for dinner. He was now playing downstairs with his grandfather. She then went into her bedroom to get ready herself. As she walked into the room JR walked towards her and pulled her into a tight embrace.

"Hey you" she said "I'm supposed to be getting ready"

JR kissed her "I know but I can't resist you" he said

Sue Ellen pulled away from him "I'm going to take a shower okay" she smiled kissing him.

JR got himself changed and sat on the bed waiting for Sue Ellen to come out of the bathroom. He laughed as he heard her singing in the shower..one day he was going to tape her and play it back to her when she was least expecting it. Finally she walked back into the bedroom wearing a towel. JR moved closer to her and pulled her onto the bed.

"Behave" she laughed as he began to tickle her.

"I love you" he said

"I love you too" she said

"How was Clayton?" JR asked

"He's okay….he was worried about you though….said you didn't correct John Ross when he called him 'Grandpa'" she smiled

"Well he's the nearest thing he has to one" JR said

"JR what's going to happen if Ben Stivers is Jock…where does that leave Clayton" Sue Ellen said "He's hurting…he doesn't want to lose this family"

"He's not going to" JR said "I don't believe Stivers is Jock and if he is then I hope that momma gets the quickest divorce she can"

"I forgot to tell you I've got a pre natal appointment tomorrow at 1pm do you want to come" Sue Ellen asked

JR smiled "Of course" he said "There's nothing wrong is there?"

Sue Ellen smiled "No…it's just routine"

"Okay" JR said "Maybe it's a good idea to get checked out before you go on holiday"

Sue Ellen kissed him "You know what I love you looking after me" she said

"These past few days it's been you looking after me" he replied

**Pam and Mark's House**

After enjoying a relaxing dinner Pam and Sue Ellen went outside to watch Mark and JR play football with the boys.

"Thanks for the dinner" Sue Ellen said "It was lovely"

"You're welcome" Pam said "What's going on at Southfork?"

Sue Ellen sighed "Nothing much…it's just nice to get away from there at times"

The two remained quiet as they watched the boys play football; suddenly Sue Ellen broke the silence.

"Pam what was Digger like as a father" She asked

"What brought that up" Pam asked

"Nothing..his name came up recently…guess I'm just curious" she said

"Digger was a good father he brought me up when momma left even though I wasn't his" Pam said

"Did he act differently towards you" Sue Ellen said

"No….when he was sober he was a warm and loving father; the problem was he was often drunk….but we always had Aunt Maggie; he always made sure we were safe" Pam said

"Do you miss him" Sue Ellen asked

"Yes I do and so does Cliff" Pam said

"I wonder what would have happened if Digger had married Miss Ellie" Sue Ellen said

"He never got over her" Pam said "I think even when he married momma he was still very much in love with Miss Ellie"

"Maybe JR may have turned out differently if he had Digger as a father" Sue Ellen said

"I was watching him tonight and I'm impressed with how loving he is towards you…so different from the last time you were pregnant" Pam said

"This time we're enjoying this pregnancy" Sue Ellen said "He's also enjoying spending time with John Ross, in fact we both are"

"That's good…I just hope it lasts" Pam said

"It will" Sue Ellen said "Trust me I'm not letting anyone get between us now"

**Dallas Memorial Hospital**

Sue Ellen and JR locked hands as they walked into the doctor's office. Dr Wilson carefully looked over the notes, then looked at Sue Ellen.

"How are you feeling?" she asked

"Fine" Sue Ellen said "Except constantly hungry"

"What about morning sickness" The doctor asked

"At first I was a bit sick but these past few weeks have been fine" Sue Ellen replied

"I'd like to do a ultra sound while you're here and check that everything is normal" Dr Wilson said

"Is everything okay doctor" JR asked

"This is just routine…nothing at all to worry about" Dr Wilson replied "Now if you would just like to get on the bed"

Sue Ellen gripped JR's hand as he sat beside her. The doctor smeared jelly onto Sue Ellen's abdomen and began the ultra sound. She turned the monitor towards Sue Ellen and JR so that they could see what was happening. Suddenly she stopped what she was doing, looking at the monitor closely she began to move the ultra sound scanner over Sue Ellen's abdomen.

"Is there a problem" JR asked looking concerned, he gripped Sue Ellen's hand tighter

"No" the doctor said "it's just there appears to be three heartbeats and looking at the screen I can see three babies"

"What" Sue Ellen said

"Sue Ellen, it looks like you're expecting triplets" Dr Wilson said

Sue Ellen and JR looked at each other…both not believing what they had just heard.

After leaving the doctor's surgery; they returned to JR's car and sat in silent for a few minutes.

"What are you thinking?" Sue Ellen asked

JR looked at her and gently took her hand in his "I'm scared" he said "Scared of something going wrong and losing you just like I almost did after John Ross' birth"

"JR the doctor assured us that everything will be fine; women have multiple births all the time" she replied "I'm healthier now than I was when I was pregnant with John Ross, it just means that the doctor will monitor the pregnancy more closely"

"She said they can do a c-section early if they need to but wouldn't that be dangerous both to you and the babies?" JR asked

"I was only seven months pregnant when John Ross was born…and he's fine" Sue Ellen said

"If it's a choice between losing you or the babies…I'd sooner lose them" JR said "I don't think I could live without you"

Sue Ellen kissed him "Don't talk like that please….we will get through this pregnancy together and at the end of it we will have three healthy babies" she said

"Okay….but we play it by my rules" JR said "Which means that you take things easy…you let me look after you and when work gets too much you finish"

Sue Ellen smiled "That's not a problem….I mean I'm going to love having you look after me" she said

"We should cancel the holiday" JR said

"JR we can't…we promised John Ross and I don't want to let him down. Sweetheart nothing has changed, the doctor says I'm fine and that the holiday shouldn't be a problem" she said "Beside I think we both need some time away from Southfork and I want a family holiday. Do you realize it's the one thing we've never done….had a holiday with John Ross"

"Speaking of Southfork….I think we should try and talk Clayton into selling us the Southern Cross….it would be good to be in there before the babies arrive" JR said

"You're still determined to buy it from him?" Sue Ellen said

"Sue Ellen I want somewhere we can call our own….let's face it when momma's gone Southfork will belong to Gary and I don't want to give him the satisfaction of throwing me and my family off the ranch" JR said

"Sweetheart your mother is strong….she's not going anywhere for a long, long time…and anyway who's to say that Gary is going to want the ranch" Sue Ellen said

"Part of me wants to take my family away from her……you saw how eager she was for us to go on holiday so that she could have Gary and his family visit….I've played second best all my life there's no way I'm allowing my children to do it" JR said

"Okay" Sue Ellen said

"Oh god…I can't believe we're going to have three babies…how the hell did we manage that" JR laughed

Sue Ellen smiled "I don't know" she said "But one thing I do know is that our children are going to have the best of everything and know how much we love them"

JR pulled her towards him and kissed her "I love you" he said

"I love you too" she replied "Come on let's go home…it will soon be time to pick John Ross up from school"

JR put the car into drive and they began the journey back to Southfork. JR's mind was racing…he was overjoyed at the thought of having more children but at the same time apprehensive….this pregnancy was going to be difficult for Sue Ellen and he wanted to be there for her every step of the way…he needed to find a partner for Ewing Oil; he didn't want that taking up all of his time…Sue Ellen was more important than anything. Sue Ellen laid her head against the headrest and closed her eyes. She felt tired and slightly apprehensive about the future….she thought back to her pregnancy with John Ross….that time she had been on her own but this time things would be so different. This time she had JR to look after her. As they drove through the gates of Southfork JR gently put his hand on her leg.

"Hey we're home" He smiled

Sue Ellen opened her eyes and rested her head on JR's shoulder.

"Are you tired?" he asked

"A little bit" she replied "Maybe I'll have a rest before we go to momma's tonight"

"Ahhhh I forgot about that" JR said

They got out of the car and walked over to the patio where Clayton was sat alone.

"Hey" Sue Ellen said she said as she walked over to him

"Where's momma?" JR asked

"She went out shopping to get some things for the twins and Gary" Clayton said "We don't seem to speak that often these days"

Sue Ellen and JR sat down at the table.

"So what have you two been up to?" Clayton asked

"We had a doctor's appointment…just to check on the baby" Sue Ellen said

"Is everything okay?" Clayton asked

Sue Ellen looked at JR, wanting to tell Clayton the news but also aware that JR may not want him to know yet. JR sensed what she was thinking and winked at her.

Yeah everything's fine" JR said "Although we had a bit of a surprise when the doctor did a scan"

"What happened?" Clayton asked

JR laughed "Eh well you know that crib you're making us?" JR said "Would it be possible for you to make two more just like it"

"What" Clayton said

"We're expecting triplets" Sue Ellen said

"Congratulations…you are happy about this?" Clayton asked

"Of course" JR said "But I was thinking I would really appreciate it if you would sell me the Southern Cross so that we can move up there before the babies are born"

"JR….I told you I would think about it but is that really a wise move to make now….triplets are going to be hard work and there's also John Ross to look after. You're going to need your family around you, wouldn't it be best to stay here" Clayton said

"I hear what you're saying Clayton and in a perfect world that would be the ideal situation however I'm thinking more about the future and what happens when anything happens to momma….she's probably left Southfork to Gary and I'd sooner move out now then stay here and at some point in the future be thrown out of our home by my brother" JR said

"I'm sure that would never happen" Clayton said

"Clayton I love this ranch but it will never be mine." JR said "I mean let's face it if I moved out tomorrow momma would have Gary moved in by the weekend"

"I do understand JR….but I just don't like the idea of you two being so far away" Clayton said

"Clayton you could always come and visit us at the Southern Cross" Sue Ellen said

"Okay I told you I'd think about it and I promise I will but please JR I want you also think about this….don't do anything to hasty….you've just had the biggest shock of your life" Clayton said "I'm sure your momma doesn't want you to leave"

Sue Ellen looked at JR "I'm going to get changed before we pick up John Ross" she said "See you shortly"

JR and Clayton watched her go inside.

"She looks incredibly healthy for someone expecting triplets" Clayton said

JR laughed "I know…things are going to be so much better than last time for her" he said

"You still want me to make the cribs for you?" Clayton asked

"Sure" JR said "You can even help me decorate the nursery"

"What Sue Ellen's old room?" Clayton asked

"Well that's the room she wants as the nursery" JR said "I'm not sure if it isn't a little small for three cribs though"

"But JR ten minutes ago you were trying to talk me into selling you the Southern Cross" Clayton said

"I know….part of me wants to move out of here; get as far away from momma as I can. However the most important person in this is Sue Ellen and I know she'd prefer to stay here. Her mother's moving back to Dallas and Pam and Mark are close by so I guess she feels secure here." He said

"Look talk about it while you're on holiday and if when you both come back you decide that you want the ranch then you can have it" Clayton said "In the meantime when I come back next week I'll ask Ray to help me move the furniture out of Sue Ellen's room and we can see how much space there is in there"

"I forgot you were going to the Southern Cross next week..have you told momma yet" JR asked

"No, I haven't I keep meaning to but never get around to it" Clayton replied "I'm sure it won't be a problem as she'll have Gary to keep her company"

"Clayton please don't tell her about the triplets." JR said "Just at the moment I don't want her to know

"I wish you two could just talk this through" Clayton said

"I've tried but she just shuts me out. Guess she doesn't feel my feelings are important" JR said "Another thing you could do for me"

"Go on…" Clayton said

"Could you keep an eye on Ewing Oil for me" JR said

Clayton laughed "I never thought I would hear you ask me to do that"

"I know. The only thing I ever wanted apart from Sue Ellen was Ewing Oil and now that I have it…it just doesn't seem that important anymore. I really need to find a partner to help me run it as I don't want it taking over my life anymore…I guess my priorities have changed" JR said

"That is good to hear and of course I'll keep an eye on things" Clayton said

"Thank you, well I'm going to check on my wife" JR said "Make sure she's not doing anything she shouldn't be"

"Okay….I might just go to the hardware store and see if I can pick up some wood to make these cribs from" Clayton said "By the way would you like me to pick up John Ross from school?"

"Okay….that would be great….Sue Ellen could do with the rest especially as we've got to have dinner with her mother tonight!"

JR walked into the house and went upstairs to his and Sue Ellen's room. He found her lying on the bed and walked over to her. He sat on the edge of the bed.

"Are you okay?" he asked

Sue Ellen smiled "Yes I'm fine...I just felt a bit tired"

"Clayton said he'd pick up John Ross for us" JR said "Push up and let me lie beside you"

Sue Ellen let JR lay down and then snuggled up close to him. "Mmm this feels so good" she said

JR kissed her forehead "Listen…will you be absolutely honest with me" he said

"JR when have I ever not been honest with you" she laughed

"Do you want to stay at Southfork and have the babies here" he said

"Darlin' I want to be where you're happiest" she said "But if you want the truth…part of me wants to stay here. Momma's moving back to Dallas, Pam's here and this is our home. We're going to need all the help we can get with these babies and I just feel that if we move to the Southern Cross then we'll be isolating ourselves"

JR sighed as Sue Ellen rested her head on his shoulder "Okay….you are the most important person to me and I will do anything for you….so if you really want to stay, we'll stay" he said

Sue Ellen kissed him "I love you and I promise everything will be okay. I just think Miss Ellie has kept this secret for so long that she's finding it hard to communicate with you…doesn't know what to say. Perhaps when we come back from holiday things will be different…maybe it will give her time to think and see things in a different light" she said

"I think that I've finally accepted that my parents didn't love me and that's fine as long as I have you and our children; as long as I know that you love me" JR said

"You know I do" Sue Ellen said "So does John Ross. Thinking about it we don't need to stay at Southfork to stay in Dallas….we could find somewhere else to live in Dallas"

"Maybe" JR said as he placed his hand on her stomach "How soon before I can feel these three moving" he asked

Sue Ellen smiled and placed her hand over his "Not for a while….." she said "I just hope they're not as bad as John Ross was. He had such a strong kick….he used to wake up in the middle of the night and start to play football with my inside. I knew it had to be a boy"

JR laughed

"You can laugh…but it's not your inside that they'll be using as a playground" Sue Ellen said

"I asked Clayton not to tell momma about the babies" JR said

"Why?" Sue Ellen asked

"I don't know…I guess I don't want her to know yet. I doubt she'd be interested anyway" JR said

"Hey…come on that's not entirely fair….I mean she loves John Ross" Sue Ellen said "What about my mother do we tell her?"

"If you want to" JR said

"Sweetheart we need to find a way around this problem….I want my children to know both their grandparents" Sue Ellen said

"You know we've talked so much about my family lately but we've never discussed yours" JR said

"What do you want me to tell you?" Sue Ellen asked

"Everything" JR said "The only members of your family I know about are you mother and Kristin, what was your father like"

"JR…my father died shortly after Kristin was born. What I remember about him most was the arguments he used to have with my mother about money. We weren't rich and she wanted the best for her girls and he couldn't provide. Sometimes I lay in bed listening to them argue and then the baby would cry and the next thing you heard was the door slam….daddy would go out and not come back until the following morning." Sue Ellen said

"Were things always like that?" JR asked

Sue Ellen smiled "When I was little I was daddy's little girl….I remember he actually taught me to swim….one very rare family holiday when I was five years old…we went down to Florida and spent some time on the beach. We'd play for hours, building sandcastles….checking out rockpools while momma would sunbathe. I remember him teaching me to swim that year. Another time I was about three years old and he had to go away for work anyway when he came back he brought with him this enormous teddy bear for me. In fact it was almost as big as me" she said

"So he wasn't all that bad….what was his line of work?" JR asked

"He was in the building trade and would often spend time away from us. He had to travel to where the work was" Sue Ellen said "However he always used to bring me presents when he came home"

"What happened to him?" JR asked

"He left…one day I guess he had enough of all the arguments and just walked out. It wasn't until about a year later that momma heard that he was dead. Apparentely he go into a fight at a bar and was beaten up so badly that he never recovered…or that's what momma told me" she replied

"Why do you think he's still alive?" JR asked

Sue Ellen looked at him "No…I just had this fantasy that one day he would walk back into my life." She said

"That's why you mother was obsessed with having you marry someone rich" JR said

"She wanted us to have what she didn't. I mean when she came back last time her reaction to our marriage was that I should divorce you, take John Ross and find another millionaire to marry" Sue Ellen said "If only life was that simple. It took her a long time to understand my decision to let John Ross stay at Southfork and then to move back in there"

JR pulled Sue Ellen closer to him and kissed her.

"Of course you do realize I knew all along what your game was. You wanted me back at Southfork so that I lost my right of custody over John Ross" Sue Ellen said

"Then why did you move back?" JR asked

"To give my son what he deserve…two parents even if they no longer loved each other…but I can tell you it was hard…very hard" Sue Ellen said "I no longer felt I belonged here and I felt bad that we were deceiving John Ross….he thought that me living back at Southfork meant we were back together as a family but I knew we weren't"

"I remember that night after you arrived back…we had dinner then we went upstairs and put John Ross to bed…for five minutes we were a normal happy family and then once our son's door was closed I left. I think that if you had asked me to stay I would have" JR said

"It's easy to say that now!" Sue Ellen laughed

"I'm serious…I remember watching you at dinner while you were talking to John Ross and Clayton….hearing the warmth of your voice and watching you tenderly touch our son's cheek as you spoke to him….I think I knew then that divorce was out of the question that somewhere down the line Mandy and I would finish and I would try and get you back. In my own way I loved you then and I have always loved you" JR said "Hey we're getting off the subject we were talking about you and your childhood"

"There really isn't much to say" Sue Ellen said

"What about grandparents?" JR asked

"Well both my grandfathers were dead by the time I was born so was my momma's mother but I remember my daddy's mom…now she was the total opposite of momma. She died when I was twelve but I think if she had been alive she would have stopped momma putting me in all the beauty paegents" Sue Ellen said "I remember I used to go and stay with her when I was about 6 or 7, we used to spend time baking, making chocolate cakes or flapjacks. One thing I always remember is that I used to love to lick the bowl out afterwards"

"That's disgusting" JR said

"No, I used to love uncooked cake mix. I hope one of these babies is a girl just so that I can enjoy doing things like that with her. She also taught me to sew when I was about 10. She also used to like to do tapestry and embroidery and taught me how to do that. In fact when we were first married I used to still do embroidery so nights when you were off on your travels" Sue Ellen said "She also gave me a love of books…we would spend hours looking at books in bookshops when we went shopping….every night I stayed with her she would read to me or listen while I read to her.

"And I thought the only shopping you like to do was for clothes and shoes" JR laughed

"When grandma died and it was just momma, me and Kristin I would sometimes walk to the park and find somewhere quiet to sit and read. Something I haven't done in a long time" Sue Ellen said "Grandma never put too much importance into money….she always told me there were more important things in life and I think after eight years of marriage to you I realized that. I remember shortly after our seven wedding anniversary…that was a great night….we went out to dinner…came home then you left me for someone else. I knew there had to be more to life than this…I wanted to be loved even if it meant having no money at all. I tell you this JR if you lost Ewing Oil tomorrow I wouldn't care as long as I have you and know that you love me then I'm happy."

"I'm sorry…guess I'm pretty lousy husband material aren't I" He said

Sue Ellen kissed him "No…you're not, you just needed to learn what was important and I think you've finally found out" she said

"Definitely" JR said "I can say that I definitely married the right Sheppard girl" he laughed

"Momma did a better job on her than on me…I think she had momma's ruthless streak in her" Sue Ellen said "I wonder what would have happened if daddy had still be alive"

"Do you regret doing the beauty paegents then?" JR asked

Sue Ellen sighed "Not my favourite thing to do…and if we ever do have a daughter I can tell you now that there is no way I'm putting her through that!" she said "It just felt as though you were part of a human cattle market…every inch of you being scrutinized." She said "I think momma was so upset when I didn't go in for Miss America….but I just felt that I've done all the beauty pagents I wanted to"

"If you hadn't we wouldn't have met" JR said "I feel so guilty over the past….all the nights I left you alone…..the other women….the comments I made at times and then I think you're still here and I know that the only reason you're here is because you're the only person who ever truly loved me"

"I can't imagine life without you" she laughed "I fell in love with you the night of the Miss Texas contest and I think I knew at that point that I would love you for the rest of my life. I know how much you're hurting now….but that has made you finally open up to me in the way that I've been hoping you would for years"

"I always believed it was a form of weakness to cry in front of a woman but I remember that morning in the car after I spoke to momma and she just dismissed my feelings as unimportant…I couldn't hold back the tears and you just took me in your arms and let me cry, comforted me and never once made me feel weak or foolish" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at him "That's what I'm here for" she said "To look after my two favourite men"

"Yeah but from now on we're going to have to look after you" JR said "This pregnancy is going to be tough on you"

"JR I promise everything will be fine….this time I'm not going to risk anything that might harm these babies." Sue Ellen said "I'm also hoping that things will change with Miss Ellie; I really do want her to be part of these babies' life….maybe while we're gone Clayton can talk to her again"

"He's not so bad is he" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "He's the best substitute father anyone could have" she said "JR I know how you felt about Jock but I really want these children brought up with Clayton as their grandfather…to let them call him grandpa"

"I think I can live with that" JR said "By the way I asked him to keep an eye on Ewing Oil for me"

Sue Ellen laughed "I'd love to have seen the expression on his face when you asked him that" she said

"Well I guess someone has to keep an eye on it and he was the best person for the job" JR replied "Maybe when we come back I'll ask him to help me out on a permanent basis, it's either that all asking Cliff Banes to consider a partnership in Ewing Oil"

"You wouldn't!" Sue Ellen laughed

"Let's just say I need some help!" JR said "I don't want Ewing Oil consuming me like it used to and with you pregnant I want to devote my time to you and John Ross; I mean once these babies are born we're going to be busy"

"I need to talk to Mark about Grayson's Foundation….there's no way I can still work and look after three babies and John Ross but I still want to be involved in it" Sue Ellen said "Even if it's only as part of the support team"

"I know how much this means to you and we'll find a way around it….you wont be alone in looking after these babies I promise you I want to help you in everyway I can" JR said "Which is why I need to find a way of getting help in Ewing Oil"

"Maybe we could meet up with Mark and Pam for lunch tomorrow" Sue Ellen said

"Okay" JR said "I can't believe in two days time it will be just you, me and the boys"

"I hope you don't get too bored…I mean you've never taken time off work for a holiday before" Sue Ellen said

"What about our second honeymoon" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "That wasn't for very long….and I always had a sneaky feeling that you were doing deals" she said "Beside if I can recall we spent most of the time doing your favourite activity"

JR laughed and kissed her "It was pretty good wasn't it" he said

"I had such high hopes for our second marriage….I wanted to be the only woman you made love to…to be your confidant but it didn't work out that way" she said

"I'm sorry……Holly Harwood was one of the biggest mistakes of my life" JR said

"But why…..what did she have that I didn't, what did she do to you that I didn't" Sue Ellen said, feeling tears fill her eyes. Even after all this time the sight of JR and Holly in bed still got to her.

JR looked into her eyes and kissed her forehead "Absolutely nothing….she set me up…gave me a challenge and I fell for it. I felt so guilty about what I did to you" he said

Sue Ellen sighed and smiled "Why are we talking about this?" she said "Finally I have what I've wanted all my life….you, that night of the fundraiser we made a commitment to each other to wipe out the bad times and start again and I know we're going to succeed"

"But the pain is still there isn't it?" JR asked

"It hurts to think that I wasn't enough for you….that you needed other women…but I think we've turned the corner and I hope that the only woman you'll ever need is me" she said

JR smiled "I promise" he said, suddenly they were disturbed by a knock on the door. JR looked at the bedside clock and smiled

"Come in" He said

John Ross opened the door and looked at his parents lying on the bed "Momma! Daddy!" he said as he jumped on the bed and pushed his way in between them.

Sue Ellen kissed him "Have you had a good day at school" she said

"Yeah…it was okay….I had a maths test" he said

"How did you do" JR asked

"I got 18 out of 20" his son replied

"That's my boy" JR said kissing him.

"Grandpa took me to the hardware store…he got some wood and said I can watch him make the crib for the baby" John Ross said

"That's nice" Sue Ellen said "Sweetheart we need to talk to you about the baby"

"Why" John Ross said

"John Ross…there are three babies" JR said

"How did that happen?" John Ross asked

"I asked the same question" JR laughed

"Sometimes these things happen" Sue Ellen said "But that doesn't mean that we wont want you anymore. You are still my precious baby and we love you…beside now you've got to be a real big brother and help us look after them…do you think you can do that?"

"Sure" John Ross said

"And when they're asleep we will make sure that you get lots of our attention" Sue Ellen said "We'll always make time for you…..I promise you nothing will change"

John Ross hugged his parents "I'm going to go and find grandpa" he said

"Okay but get changed first" Sue Ellen said kissing him on the forehead

After John Ross had left the room, Sue Ellen looked at JR who was deep in thought

"What's wrong?" she said

"I was just thinking….part of me is scared for him; that we might get so caught up in looking after the babies we forget him….I don't want him to feel like I do" JR said

"It's not going to happen….sure we're going to have a lot of work to do looking after the triplets but we will find time for our son; he's the one thing that has always brought us back together. We will still read to him, play with him and make him feel special….because that is what he is. He's the baby we waited so long for….I think whatever problems we've had in the past we were always united in our love for him. Nothing is going to change that" Sue Ellen said

"When we get back from holiday I want to take him fishing and camping….maybe go horse riding with him and Clayton on the ranch…see if I can feel safe riding a horse again" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "Hey let's go and find our son" she said

Meanwhile Miss Ellie sat in her bedroom alone….she had come home from shopping to find everything quiet and Clayton's car missing. She'd decided to go upstairs and sort through some old pictures that were in shoe boxes kept in her closet. She picked up one of Digger, a smile formed on her lips when she remembered how close they had once been…although her and Jock had a close relationship it wasn't the same as what she had shared with Digger. Tears fell on the picture as she thought about how she had treated her and Digger's son over the years….letting Jock take him into the business….not protecting him when Jock forced him to work with him instead of letting him enjoy a childhood. She loved JR, she truly loved him but she could never show it but she knew she had to find away unless she'd lose him. Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of laughter coming from the patio…she stood up and walked to the window and looked down. She saw Sue Ellen and JR walking towards the barn….hand in hand, laughing and talking. She watched as the couple stop, JR pulling Sue Ellen closer to him and kissing her; then lifting her off her feet and swinging her around, then as he gently lowered her to her feet he kissed her again. She thought about how things had been between last year but now they looked so happy and so in love. Maybe Sue Ellen could help JR discover the true meaning of love. As Ellie watched them her thoughts turned to Gary, she was pleased that he was coming to stay but she secretly knew that she would be glad to have JR and Sue Ellen back of holiday….she wanted to share this pregnancy with them but most of all she wanted to talk to her son and tell him how much she loved him. She made up her mind that when they returned from holiday the first thing she was going to do was put things right with JR.

**JR and Sue Ellen's room**

JR lay on the bed dressed only in his robe waiting for Sue Ellen to come out of the shower. Suddenly an evil thought crossed his mind, he got up and walked into the bathroom. Opening the door of the shower he watched Sue Ellen for a moment.

"Hey do you mind if I join you?" he asked

Sue Ellen turned around and smiled "What are you waiting for" she said

JR removed his robe and stepped into the shower, wrapping his arms around Sue Ellen's waist he tenderly kissed her "Here, let me scrub your back for you" he said as he took the loofar from her. Sue Ellen sighed as he gently began to soap her back.

Happy?" JR asked

"Yes" Sue Ellen replied "More than I ever thought I could be"

She turned to face him; tenderly she stroked his face "Everything is going to be okay JR…I just know it. By Christmas we will have three more healthy children….nothing is ever going to hurt us again" she said

"Aren't you nervous?" JR asked

"Not really; but the more I think about it the more I want these babies….I felt the same with John Ross. It was never just about having the firstborn boy…the heir to the Ewing fortune…it was about having a connection to you….something that no other woman would have…a bond that would bind us forever and now that connection is stronger" she replied

"I always did want a big family" JR laughed

Sue Ellen looked at him "That is something that you've kept well hidden over the years" she said

"Darlin' there's a side to me that only you and our children will know" He said "I guess I wanted to feel like I belonged. Growing up there were times that I felt I didn't have anyone; after grandpa died there was noone there in the middle of the night when my nightmares got scary….noone ever praised me when I did anything good but I was sure reprimanded when I did something bad. Having a family of your own means that you belong to someone and noone can take that away from you"

Sue Ellen kissed him "You've always belonged to me from the moment I first saw you" she said "From the moment you first kissed me I gave you my heart and no other man has ever really been able to take it away from you."

JR laughed "I keep thinking that I'm dreaming….that someday I'll wake up to find you not there" he said "I've never felt so happy or so loved. I'm just contented to spend the rest of my life in your arms. Half the time I'm at work I'm thinking about you and not how I can make Ewing Oil better. The minute you walk into the room you take my breath away and I can feel my heart jump"

"Sweetheart you're not dreaming….this is real" she said placing his hand on her stomach

"God I've been such a fool and we've wasted so much time" JR said "The only thing I need in my life is you and our children; as long as I have that the rest of the world can disappear"

"JR…this is a new start…a new adventure which we've only just began. Every step we take together whether its looking after John Ross or experiencing this pregnancy. The past is dead…its in another time and dimension what we have now is all that matters. I love you and you love me and as long as we hold onto that then we can conquer anything" Sue Ellen replied

"Even momma throwing us off this ranch" JR laughed

Sue Ellen shook her head "That's not going to happen" she said "Beside the minute she sees her three new grandchildren she is going to love them"

"But she doesn't love me" JR said

Sue Ellen kissed him "I think she loves you…perhaps she was scared to love you" she said

"How can you be scared to love your own child?" JR said

"I was in the beginning…I thought that if I loved John Ross he would hurt me just like you and Cliff had done…I remember after he was kidnapped….I was on sedatives but I got up and walked into his room…I vowed that I would never let anyone hurt me again including him and from that moment I couldn't go near him" Sue Ellen said "As for your mother….look at it this way, she was living a lie…she had to make sure Jock believe that you were his, so she distanced herself from you and let him take charge of your life. Maybe Clayton will be able to get through to her"

"But I still needed her just as much as Bobby and Gary did….there were times I felt bullied by daddy….forced to do things I didn't want to but there was noone on my side" JR said "I look at you with John Ross and I wish I had that sort of relationship with my mother. When he was learning to walk and he fell over…you'd pick him up and comfort him. When he was tired and grumpy…you'd cuddle him close to you and stroke his forehead until he fell asleep. Even now, when you were not able to read him stories at night you made tapes for him just so that he can go to sleep hearing your voice."

"He's my baby…he always will be even when he's grown up" Sue Ellen said "Maybe one day you'll hear the truth from Miss Ellie but I think it's too soon at the moment. Just don't hate her"

JR kissed her "You sure we have to go to your mother's tonight" He asked

Sue Ellen laughed as the water from the shower splashed them "Yes we do and we should get out of here….not the ideal place to have a deep and meaningful conversation" she said

"Hmmm, we've been having a lot of those lately" JR said "But you're right I can think of something much more interesting to do here"

Sue Ellen kissed him "I know" she said, knowing that she wanted him as much as he wanted her "However we really have to get dressed"

JR held her tightly and kissed her passionately; Sue Ellen found herself wanting to give in to him; wanting to let him love her in the way that only he could. Finally she broke away from him and looked into his eyes; realizing that for the first time in days they were sparkling, she smiled "I love you" she said "And trust me you are not alone…I will always be on your side"

"I love you too" He said "Just knowing that you love me and will always be here for me makes life work living"

"Hey come on let's get dressed" Sue Ellen said as she turned off the shower. Taking JR's hand she led him out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. Reluctantly they began to get ready to go out. Half an hour later they walked downstairs and found John Ross in the living room with Miss Ellie.

"Where are you two going?" Miss Ellie asked

"My mother's" Sue Ellen said "She's moving back to Dallas and we're going to see her tonight before we go on holiday"

"Hey buddy, are you ready to go?" JR asked

"Do I have to?" John Ross asked

"Yes you do" Sue Ellen laughed "You haven't seen Grandma Sheppard in nearly a year"

"But last time I saw her she tried to make me leave Southfork and live with her and you" John Ross remarked

"Don't worry…that's not going to happen this time" JR said

"JR…I was wondering if I could have a word with you" Miss Ellie said

JR looked at Sue Ellen…he didn't want a confrontation with his mother again "Sorry momma, we're running late" he said

"Okay…..maybe we can chat later" Miss Ellie said

"I don't know….I'm really busy at the moment trying to get Ewing Oil sorted for while I'm on holiday….maybe we could talk when I come back from holiday….beside I guess you're busy getting things ready for Gary" JR said

"Bye Miss Ellie…come on John Ross we're leaving" Sue Ellen said

"Bye….have fun" Miss Ellie said

They walked outside to JR's car…John Ross got into the back while JR opened the door for Sue Ellen. Sue Ellen kissed him "You're going to have to talk to her one day" she said

"But not now….." JR said "Maybe when we come back off holiday things will have cooled down"

Meanwhile Ben Stivers stood in his room. In his hand he held the envelope containing the letter he wrote to Miss Ellie explaining why he had come back to Dallas. He walked outside and took one last look at Southfork before deciding that now was the time to leave. He left thinking of the old Southfork when Aaron Southworth was still alive…he and Miss Ellie had been close….she had confiding in him told him things that he knew she would have kept secret for all these years until now…..he knew that part of her believed he was Jock and that he had forced her to tell the one secret that he knew she wanted to take to her grave. He thought about Jock Ewing…..he hated him….the man was arrogant and didn't deserve Miss Ellie….from the moment Jock moved into Southfork things changed; he knew that he could no longer work there as Jock's employee; Jock had set him up…didn't like the way he spent time with Miss Ellie….he planted money in Ben's room then accused him of stealing only to search his room finding the money under his mattress. Ben had tried to prove his innocence but Jock threw him off the ranch; not only that he had made it impossible for Ben to find employment in Dallas forcing him to leave his home. He made a new life for himself in South America…got married and had three children….that was until a fatal car crash had killed his wife and children fifteen years ago leaving him alone and lost. He thought he was beginning to get back on his feet until he saw Jock Ewing walk into the bar where he was living; he had followed Jock that night and found out where he was staying; then the next day he broke into his hotel room, he didn't know why he had done that but something inside him cracked when he saw Jock…looking around the hotel he found letters that Ellie had written to them..without thinking he put them in his pocket then looked through the drawers in the room finding Jock's watch and his belt. After a few years and on hearing about the death of Bobby Ewing he decided it was time to return to Dallas and face the ghosts of long ago….only he knew Miss Ellie's secret and part of him wanted revenge for her not supporting him when Jock fired him. He didn't realize how easy it would be for him to make her believe he was Jock Ewing….but she had and because of that revealed the secret that had been hidden for years. They say that revenge is a dish best served cold however this particular dish left him with a sour taste in his mouth. It seemed a lifetime ago but there was a time when he would have done anything for Ellie but she had let him down. Sadly he turned back and walked into his room, holding the letter he sat down on his bed and felt tears spring to his eyes; Southfork had once been his home now he didn't feel anything just a sense of numbness. Standing up he pick up his bag, taking one last look around his room he left the letter on the bed and walked towards the door, this time he didn't look back as he walked out into the still cool Texas evening. Closing the door behind him he made his way out of Southfork and the Ewings' lives forever.

Clayton walked into the living room to find Miss Ellie sitting alone reading a book.

"Hi" he said "I've just seen JR and Sue Ellen leave….JR doesn't look to impressed with having to spend the evening with Sue Ellen's mother"

Miss Ellie laughed "Well after the last time they met I'm not surprised" she said "However I don't think I've ever seen those two look so happy and contented. Sue Ellen looks radiant…this pregnancy seems to have brought out a glow in her that I don't remember seeing when she was pregnant with John Ross"

"I spoke to them earlier…they had a doctor's appointment and saw the first pictures of the baby" Clayton said

"They didn't tell me that…in fact JR didn't say anything much to me at all" Ellie said "I think he actually hates me"

"I think he feels that you just don't love him…that you would prefer Gary to be living here rather than him" Clayton said "I get the impression he feels that as he's not Jock's son you don't love him"

"That's not true" Ellie said

"Ellie….you told me that you don't feel for JR what you feel for Gary and Bobby" Clayton said

"I can't explain how I feel….I don't know if I can put my feelings into words. It's complicated" Ellie said

"You're going to have to talk to him….or else you'll lose him and your grandchildren" Clayton said "Is that what you want?"

"Of course not…I want to put this right but I don't know if I can" she replied

"Wait until they come back off holiday" Clayton said "But you have to open up to JR. By the way I'm going up to the Southern Cross on Sunday for a few days. There are things I need to do up there…also Dusty is going be up there and I want to talk to him"

"Do you have to go now?" Ellie said

"You'll have Gary and the children. I just thought that this would be a good time" he replied

"I guess you'll right…..things will be really hectic here with the twins "Ellie said" When will you be back"

Clayton smiled, good grief if she thought that having the twins would be hectic….heaven help her when Sue Ellen gave birth, he thought.

"Probably Friday next week" Clayton said

**Patricia Sheppard's House**

JR and Sue Ellen sat in the car outside her mother's house. Sue Ellen looked at JR knowing exactly what he was thinking, she took his hand and squeezed it tightly.

"Come on, I'm hungry" she said

"Into the lion's den" JR said "I just remember the last time I saw your mother. There was a good deal of hostility between us"

"She knows we're back together. She'll be okay as long as I'm happy" Sue Ellen said

"Did you tell her about the baby?" JR asked

"No…we're do that together" Sue Ellen smiled

Reluctantly they got out of the car and walked towards the door, John Ross running in front of them. Patricia Sheppard had seen the car pull up and opened the door as they approached.

"Hi grandma…what's for dinner…I'm starving" John Ross said

"Now who does he take after" Sue Ellen laughed looking at JR

"Hello John Ross" Patricia Shepard said "My…you have grown" she said kissing his head

"Hi momma" Sue Ellen said

"Hi darlin'" she said "JR…how nice to see you again"

"Hello Patricia…Sue Ellen tells me you're back in Dallas for good" he said

"Well I've had enough of traveling for a while" Patricia replied

They went inside the house, and Sue Ellen helped her mother bring the dinner out to the table. During dinner they chatted about what had happened since Patricia had been away.

"So how is Grayson's research?" Patricia asked

"Brilliant" Sue Ellen replied "For the first time in my life I feel like I'm making a difference"

JR looked at her and smiled "She's quite good at making money as well as spending it" he said

"What about you JR…how's the oil business?" Patricia asked

"Fine" JR said

"How long are you going to be away?" Patricia asked

"About three weeks" Sue Ellen said "We're going to go to Orlando for two weeks then spend a week at the Seychelles relaxing"

"JR…I'm surprised you can leave the oil business for that long" Patricia said "I thought you were married to Ewing Oil…..and what was the name of that woman you were hanging around with last time I was here"

"Momma, please" Sue Ellen said looking at John Ross

"Sue Ellen…I saw how he nearly destroyed you the last time I was here….how do I know it wont happen again" Patricia said

JR looked at John Ross "Say buddy why don't you go and watch some television" he said

"Can I take my ice cream in there too" John Ross said

"Of course" his grandmother said

John Ross left the dinning room and went into the living room, after he had left Sue Ellen got up and gently closed the door.

"Mother whatever you think of JR…he is John Ross' father please don't bad mouth him in front of his son" Sue Ellen said

"Sue Ellen I'm wasn't happy about you moving back to Southfork and I can tell you that I'm not happy that you two seem to be back together at the moment" Patricia replied

"Momma…this time is for good…." Sue Ellen said

"Sue Ellen how many times have you said that only to find JR cheating on you behind your back" Patricia said

JR was silent he knew what Patricia was saying was true but that was in the past. This time nothing could take him away from Sue Ellen. He loved her with all of his heart.

"Patricia I know what you think of me….and I don't blame you but I promise you that I will never hurt your daughter again. When she took me back I promised her a total commitment and I intend to keep that promise. With every beat of my heart I love her" he said

Patricia looked JR in the eye. Suddenly she saw something different about him. In his eyes she saw that he was telling the truth…she looked down at the table and saw JR and Sue Ellen's hands entwined as one. She looked again at JR and saw in him a look of contentment.

"I don't want to see her hurt" Patricia said "And what about the other woman"

"Patricia…there was never any other woman….not really I was just fooling myself thinking that I could love someone else; but at the end of the day I knew that the woman I wanted was the one I was married to" JR said

"Then why did you cheat on her" Patricia asked

"I've been a fool….but these past few months with Sue Ellen I found out what love really means and I'm not prepared to lose that" he said

"Momma we have some news for you" Sue Ellen said

"What" she asked

Sue Ellen looked at JR and smiled "I'm pregnant" Sue Ellen replied

Patricia's eyes lit up "Really….how long" she asked

"About three months….it's due in November just before Christmas" Sue Ellen replied "Although this pregnancy is going to be different"

"In what way" Patricia said

Sue Ellen looked at JR "So are you going to tell her or am I" she said

JR winked at her "I think you better" he said

Sue Ellen laughed, she couldn't believe how happy she felt at the thought of having three babies "Momma….we're having triplets" she said

Patricia looked shocked "My god….I don't believe it" she said

"It's true" JR said

"But this is going to put a strain on Sue Ellen…what about the holiday….should she really be traveling in her condition" Patricia said

"Momma I'm fine….I'm doing better than I was when I was pregnant with John Ross." Sue Ellen said

"Patricia…I promise you I'm going to look after her and as for the holiday…I'll make sure she doesn't overdo things" JR said

"And you're both happy about this" Patricia asked

"Yes" JR and Sue Ellen said in unison

Patricia got up and hugged the couple; desperately wanting to believe JR when he promised to look after Sue Ellen. She was all she had left now. They continued talking for a while then at 9.30pm they decided they better get John Ross home to bed.

**Southfork**

JR carried a sleeping John Ross upstairs to bed; as Sue Ellen put him in his pajamas her son woke up.

"Momma I'm not tired" he yawned

Sue Ellen laughed "Oh yes you are sweetheart…it's late" she said

"Can I have a story?" John Ross asked

"Buddy it's time to go to sleep" JR said

"Just one" John Ross pleaded

Sue Ellen took one look into her son's eyes….the same eyes as her husband's and melted.

"Okay" she said "Just one"

JR and Sue Ellen cuddled up to their son and read him a story afterwards they kissed him and he snuggled down to sleep. Having said goodnight they turned off the light and went into their own room. JR pulled Sue Ellen into an embrace and kissed her.

"Sorry about my mother" she said

"Hey it wasn't your fault and I guess she has a right to be worried….I mean I haven't exactly got a good track record" he said

"At least she's pleased about the babies…which got me thinking that we really ought to tell Miss Ellie…especially as both Clayton and my mother know" Sue Ellen said

"We will but let's leave it until after the holiday" JR said "She's more interested in having her other family around"

"She did try to talk to you tonight" Sue Ellen said

"I know….hey are you tired" JR asked

Sue Ellen smiled "Not really"

JR kissed her passionately "Neither am I…..you know what I really would love" he said

"What" Sue Ellen asked

"You" he smiled

JR pushed her back onto the bed and kissed her, feeling for the zip at the back of her dress he undid it and began pushing it off her shoulders. Tenderly he kissed her shoulders.

"JR" Sue Ellen said. Her hand wandered to the zip of his trousers…JR sighed as he felt her hand make contact with his manhood.

"God have I told you how much I love you" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "Show me"

Slowly they undressed each other and began to make love. JR worked his way down Sue Ellen's body leaving no place unkissed; as he reached her stomach he tenderly stroked it longing to feel the kick of his unborn children. Finally he worked his way back up her body and found her mouth. Together they found their rhythm and let their love making take them to the heights of ectasy. Afterwards they relaxed in each others arms. JR holding Sue Ellen tightly as she drifted off to sleep.

"I love you" he said kissing her

The next day JR took John Ross to school before dropping Sue Ellen off at work.

"Don't work too hard" he said as he kissed her goodbye

"See you at lunchtime" she said

JR walked into his office at Ewing Oil and sat down in his chair looking out of the window. He had work on his desk to do but somehow he couldn't concentrate…his mind was filled with Sue Ellen and his children. He wanted to be the best husband and father ever. He was so looking forward to sharing this pregnancy with Sue Ellen and also spending some time with his son. He turned his chair around and looked around his office…somehow this place didn't hold the same attraction to him now…..there was a time when Ewing Oil was the most important thing. Building the company to make his daddy proud of him but that had been a joke. Trying to shake himself out of his dream world he looked at the pile of papers on his desk….there were letters to sign and some deals that he had to look at before he went away. He really was looking forward to this holiday….he felt that he deserved it after all the years of hard work he had put in for the company. He was determined that during this holiday his only thoughts would be about his family…Ewing Oil would not enter his mind. He began to get on with the work in front of him.

Sue Ellen sat in her office busily organizing the next charity event for Graysons'. Her mind too was on JR and her mother's words the night before. She understood why her mother was concerned about her but Sue Ellen felt strong and certain that JR and her would succeed this time. She didn't understand it but her and JR were mean't to be together. No matter what they did to each other somehow they always found their way back to each other despite the pain and heartache. She knew they were just meant to be together…soulmates forever…apart they were only half complete. She didn't realize how quickly time was passing until she heard a knock on her door and looked up to find JR standing there.

"Hey, not working too hard are you" JR asked

Sue Ellen's eyes lit up at the sight of him and she smiled "Not anymore I'm not…I'm starving" she said

"I've just spoken to Mark…Pam is going to meet us at the resturarant" JR said

She walked around her desk to where JR was standing and pulled into a kiss.

"Hell…if I had thought I'd get that kind of reception I would have arrived earlier" he said

"I've missed you" she said

They walked out of the office hand in hand and drove to the restaurant. Pam was already waiting for them when they walked in.

"Hey Pam" Sue Ellen said

Pam hugged Sue Ellen "Hey, how are you…you look wonderful" she said "Pregnancy agrees with you"

"So do you" Sue Ellen said

They sat talking while waiting for Mark and once he arrived they ordered their meals.

"So what did you two want to talk to us about" Mark said "Don't tell me you're not going on holiday"

"No, it's nothing like that" Sue Ellen said "We wouldn't disappoint the boys like that"

"Is everything alright?" Pam said looking concerned.

"Everything's fine" Sue Ellen said "But I'm going to have to give up work sooner than I thought"

"Is there a problem with the pregnancy?" Mark asked

Sue Ellen looked at JR "Well…yes and no" she said "I'm expecting triplets"

"What!" Pam said

"You heard" Sue Ellen laughed

"Oh my god…how do you feel" Pam asked

"Wonderful…I'm looking forward to it" Sue Ellen said "But it means that I'm going to get tired easily during this pregnancy so Mark I don't think I can carry on with Graysons' for much longer"

"That's fine…I mean I'm going to miss you as PR but you can still support us" Mark said

"Of course" Sue Ellen said

"Mark I've sorted out your venue and I guarantee that this event will cost you nothing" JR said

"What have you done?" Mark asked

"Nothing…just called in a few favours" JR said

"JR how do you feel about this pregnancy" Pam said

"Well I'm excited but also worried how this is going to affect Sue Ellen so I intend on keeping an eye on her and making sure she doesn't overdo things" JR replied

"Pam….this time everything is going to be perfect" Sue Ellen said

"You look so happy" Pam said

"I am" Sue Ellen replied taking JR's hand in hers and squeezing it. JR tenderly kissed her on the cheek.

"Pam I promise you…I'm going to take care of her" JR said

Pam looked at him and for a moment she saw a different JR from the one she recognized. Something in his eyes had changed…suddenly she found herself believing him when he told her that he was going to take care of Sue Ellen. She truly believed that he loved his wife.

After finishing their meal Mark told Sue Ellen to take the rest of the day off work, after getting into JR's car Sue Ellen turned to JR and said.

"Are you going back to work?"

JR smiled "Mark has given you the rest of the day off work and there's no place I'd rather be than lying in the arms of my wonderful, gorgeous, beautiful pregnant wife. So in reply to you question I'm not going back to work"

Sue Ellen snuggled up to him "I do love you" she said

"I love you too" JR said kissing her on the forehead "And thank you for trusting me enough to give me another chance. I will never do anything to hurt you again…I love you and our children too much to risk losing you"

Sue Ellen looked at him and smiled "I know" she said kissing him


	6. Chapter 6

**JR and Sue Ellen's Room**

The day of their holiday arrived quicker than they expected. JR woke early and looked down at a sleeping Sue Ellen; he smiled as he watched her, gently placing his hand on her stomach…wondering what was happening inside her. He was looking forward to watching this pregnancy develop and being part of it. He was determined that he would give both Sue Ellen and John Ross his undivided attention from now on. He suddenly thought about the nursery they were planning to decorate….perhaps when they get back from holiday he could ask Clayton to help him that's if they decided to stay at Southfork. His thoughts turned back to when he had been small and his grandfather had been alive; he had loved the ranch…spent hours outside in the fields watching his grandfather work; riding the horses around the ranch…sometimes spending the day fishing…part of him didn't want to leave but he knew that when anything happened to his momma the ranch would go to Gary and he couldn't bear the thought of being forced off it by his own brother. He needed to talk to his mother but the words he needed to say just wouldn't come out…why was it that the only person who understood him was Sue Ellen? When he was with her he didn't need to explain how he felt she seemed to know. He felt her stir in his arms so gently kissed her cheek. Slowly she opened her eyes

"Hi" she smiled "What time is it?"

"6.30 am" JR replied "Just think in twelve hours time we'll be in Florida"

"Yes and we need to get up and pack" Sue Ellen laughed "We kind of got distracted last night"

"That was your fault not mine!" JR said

"How do you work that one out" Sue Ellen asked

"Because if you weren't so beautiful I wouldn't have wanted to make love to you" he said "Then we would have got more packing done"

Sue Ellen laughed and kissed him "You're incorrigible!"

"I can't believe we're going on holiday" JR said "I can't believe I'm going to be spending two weeks in Disneyworld"

Sue Ellen laughed "What I'm going to enjoy most is watching you take the boys on all the rides…as I can't in my condition" she said

"We've never had a real holiday" JR said

"I know there are so many places I would have liked to visit…Paris, Venice, London, New York…" Sue Ellen said "You were just so involved with work that we never got around to it"

"We've never taken John Ross on holiday either" JR said

"John Ross is looking forward to this; he's so happy he's going to have his daddy around for three weeks without Ewing Oil as a distraction" Sue Ellen said

"We're going to have to make sure that we have a holiday every year" JR said

"That sounds good. Perhaps a beach holiday or something like that…but definitely a holiday where there's no distractions from work" Sue Ellen said

"Work will never be a distraction again….I mean even when I'm in the office I'm want to get back to you and John Ross. I don't know why but whenever I'm with you two I feel safe and not afraid to show the real JR Ewing" JR said

"And who is the real JR Ewing" Sue Ellen smiled

"I don't know" JR said "I guess someone who loves his family and needs to know that his family love him; I was thinking earlier about Grandpa and how I used to follow him around the ranch like a shadow. I loved him and I think he loved me but after he died I felt so alone…..I shut all emotions out, I couldn't deal with them….there are things I want to say to momma but she doesn't understand me…she just sees what everyone else sees…a man who will do anything to get what he wants. I need to know that she loves me even though I'm not Jock's son but she can't even tell me that. All I want now is to be a good husband and father….to give you the love you deserve and to give my all my children the love I felt deprived of. I don't want them to feel the loneliness and rejection that I've felt over the years."

Sue Ellen kissed him "JR….I don't know what's going on in Miss Ellie's mind but I'm sure she loves you and I'm sure your grandfather loved you too. This holiday is going to be so good for all of us; it will give you a chance to form a closer bond with your son and that's what I want more than anything. John Ross loves you he always has I remember one time after our divorce, you called round with some flowers and building blocks for John Ross…I lied and told you he was asleep however he was playing in the living room but as soon as he heard your voice…he was at the door. Do you remember the time after you were recovering from the shooting we were lying on the bed with John Ross between us and you were tickling him…I thought you were going to make him sick; anyway he got grouchy so I thought I'd put him to bed but he insisted that you did it. His first word was 'daddy'"

"I remember after he was born….I went alone to the hospital to visit him; you were having one of your dizzy spells. I stood at the window of the nursery watching him for about ten minutes before a nurse came and told me that I could go in and hold him. Part of me wanted to walk out but seeing him lying there alone touched me…all the anger I felt at him not being mine disappeared for that moment and I followed the nurse into the nursery. The baby was crying as I approached him but as soon as I looked down at him he stopped…I remember carefully picking him up not wanting to drop him and as I cradled him in my arms he drifted off to sleep. I think I sat in a chair with him for twenty minutes rocking him; desperately wanting to believe he was my son" JR said "Then when we went to pick him up from the hospital and the doctors told us that he'd been taken….I felt sick; I thought it may have been because of me that he had been kidnapped…I think it was then that I realized how much I loved him whether he was mine or not. I put on a show pretending that I didn't care about him….once he was home I never picked him up although a few times I crept into his room to watch him sleep….but I thought if I allowed myself to get to attached to him then one day he'd be taken away from me"

Sue Ellen looked at him and stroked his face "We should have had the paternity test done the moment he was born….although I didn't really need the proof to know who's son he was." She said

"I am so proud of him and I want him to know how much I love him" JR said "Lately we've spent so much time together whether it's doing homework; playing in the pool or just reading a bedtime story and I know what I've missed out on with my own father. I wish things had been different"

"I know sweetheart however maybe you didn't have a proper childhood but you can enjoy your son's starting with this trip to Disney" Sue Ellen said "Also when we're at the beach you can spend hours with him building sandcastles, making tunnels, collecting shells and just exploring….he'll love you spending time with him"

JR laughed "What about you?" he said

"Oh JR I love spending time with you….in fact all I've ever wanted was you." She said "We have to remember we've also got Christopher to look after…we need to make him feel part of our family too"

"How can you do that….knowing what Kristin did to you" JR asked

"Christopher was a victim in Kristin's games too…she used him to get money and when she died his own father carried on trying to blackmail Bobby. I was watching him the other week when the three of you were playing in the pool and I saw the look of sadness in his eyes when he saw you and John Ross fooling around…he misses Bobby so much which is why I wanted him to come on holiday with us….hopefully we can take his mind of his father" Sue Ellen said

"I'll try and make sure that I treat him the same way as John Ross" JR said

"I know you will…speaking of John Ross we better get up and check on him" Sue Ellen said "Pam's going to be here at 1.30pm to drive us to the airport"

JR kissed her "Okay" he said

After getting showered and dressed they wandered into their son's room to find it empty. They then walked downstairs and out onto the patio for breakfast.

"Hey…it's quiet out here….where is our son?" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "I have a feeling he's over there" she said pointing to the barn. "Come on let's find out"

Hand in hand they walked towards the barn, as they drew closer they heard the sound of voices from inside. John Ross and Clayton had their backs to them and were discussing the cribs that Clayton were making. Sue Ellen and JR watched them for a moment before JR said.

"What time did you get up?"

John Ross swung round on hearing his father's voice "6 am, grandpa and I had breakfast together before we came out here to work on the cribs. He's going to let me help him paint them when I come back from holiday" he said

"Clayton it's a bit early to start work" JR said

"Couldn't sleep…so I thought I'd do a few hours work before I left of the Southern Cross" He said

"Well I'm going to get something to eat…John Ross don't forget you've got to pack your suitcase" JR said "That's if you still want to come on holiday with us"

John Ross looked at his father "Yeah…I'm coming…I'm going to make you go on the rides with me" he said

JR and Sue Ellen walked back to the patio "He reminds me of me when I used to help my grandpa" JR said "By the way when did he start calling Clayton 'grandpa'?"

"Only recently" Sue Ellen said "Not quite sure where that came from…but does it matter"

"No" JR said

After getting something to eat they sat down at the table. JR looked around him.

"It's so quiet around here these days" He said "Do you remember the old days with Lucy, you, me, Bobby, Pam and Momma and Daddy. There seemed so much activity in the mornings"

"Wonder where Miss Ellie is" Sue Ellen said

"Told you…killing the fatted calf" JR laughed

Miss Ellie stood at her balcony window watching the couple on the patio. At last they seemed so happy together. She desperately wanted to talk to JR but couldn't find the words she needed to say to him. Perhaps it was better if she kept out of their way this morning..she didn't want to spoil the start of their holiday. Her thoughts turned to Gary and although she was pleased that he was coming down for a visit part of her was sad because she knew how much JR was hurting because he thought she didn't love him as much as his brother…if only she could tell him the truth. One day soon she knew she would have to talk to him….unless she would lose him forever and she couldn't bear the thought of that. He was the one thing that connected her to Digger even after all these years…part of her loved him and there were times when she wished she had taken a chance on him; maybe JR's childhood would have been different.

After breakfast JR and Sue Ellen went back upstairs to start packing for their holiday. Within an hour Sue Ellen had managed to pack two suitcases full of clothes…JR looked at her and shook his head.

"Why do you need to take two suitcases?" He asked "We're only going on holiday for three weeks"

"I want to make sure that I've got everything I need" she laughed "Beside I've also got some of your clothes in here"

JR looked down at his suitcase which wasn't even half full "Don't supposed you'd help me with mine" he asked

Sue Ellen laughed "Men" she said shaking her head and walking over to where his suitcase was. JR sat on the bed and watched her as she walked into their closet and began searching through his clothes.

"Well you don't need to take any of your suits" she said

"It's going to be really hot" JR said, JR wandered into the closet and crept up behind her wrapping his arms tightly around her waist.

"JR!" she laughed "Stop it!"

JR began kissing her neck and let his hands wander down her body. Sue Ellen sighed in contentment; wishing that they could put off their packing until later but knowing that it had to be done.

"You know what I'm looking forward to" JR said

"I can guess" Sue Ellen laughed

"Making love to you on a deserted beach beneath a sky full of stars" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at him "I never took you as being a romantic" she said "And while we're doing that where will the boys be"

"Tucked up safe and sound in bed" JR replied "I've got our own personal island in the Seychelles where we wont be disturbed and we can also cross to the main island whenever we like"

"You've got it all planned" she laughed "However if we don't finish packing..we won't be going anywhere"

Reluctantly JR let go off her and started helping her pack the suitcase. Once they had their clothes sorted out they walked into John Ross' room to start getting his clothes ready.. Sue Ellen also picked out a few story books.

"He really does love books doesn't he" JR said

"He loves having a story read to him and I know he loves listening to the tapes I made for him" Sue Ellen said "I always felt comforted when I was a child by having a story read to me. Sometimes if there was a bad thunderstorm at night my daddy used to read to me until I fell asleep. I guess hearing his voiced soothed my fears"

"I think the only person who ever read me a story was my grandpa. Momma was always too busy and it wasn't really daddy's sort of thing." JR said

"Which is why I know you're a better father than Jock ever was. I've seen how you enjoy reading to your son and how much you love him." Sue Ellen said

"After our divorce; when he used to come and stay at Southfork…I used to read to him in our bed….he was only three but he used to love looking at bright pictures. Anyway he used to fall asleep and very often I used to let him stay there instead of moving him to his bedroom. I think I enjoyed having him close to me; it also felt like you were close too" JR said

"The more we talk about the old days the more I wished we had opened up to each other. Maybe we would have reached this point sooner" Sue Ellen said

"I guess Bobby's death made me think of my own life and what I wanted. In the beginning I thought it was Mandy and John Ross but after seeing how you managed to get your life back together again and seeing you at work at Graysons' I realized it was you that I wanted. When you started going out with Jerry Kenderson I feared that I would lose you…he treated you so much better than I ever had. But I made a promise to John Ross that I was going to do everything in my power to make us a real family again" JR said "Now I regret all the bad times…the hell I put you through…the other women; who meant nothing and most of all the nights we spent apart."

Sue Ellen smiled "Well those days are gone….you will never lose me JR; there's a part of me that is yours and always has been" she said

"Can I ask you something?" JR said

"What" Sue Ellen asked

"How do you feel about me not being JR Ewing" he asked

"You're still JR Ewing" she said "But if you mean how do I feel about you being Digger's son and not Jock's…well it doesn't bother me…I didn't marry the name I married the man I loved. I feel sad that it's caused you so much heartache but to be honest nothing has changed for me. You are still the man I love; the only man I want to be with and the father of my children"

JR wrapped her in an embrace "I love you" he said "And to know that you love me is all I need"

"Hey let's finish this packing and go and see our son" Sue Ellen said

Meanwhile Clayton and John Ross had finished working on the cribs and were sat outside. Miss Ellie walked out bringing some drinks for them.

"Hey where have you two been" she asked

"We've been busy in the barn making cribs" John Ross said "Grandpa going to let me paint them when I come back from holiday"

"I said I'd let you help me paint them" Clayton laughed

"How many are you making" Miss Ellie asked

Clayton thought for a moment realizing that JR and Sue Ellen hadn't told her about the triplets. He hated the way things were between them these days. Ellie did her best to stay out of JR's way.

"Well I've gone a bit overboard….thought I might make a couple" Clayton said "Anyway I've got to go and get ready as I'm leaving in an hour"

"Bye" John Ross said

Miss Ellie sat down next to John Ross "So are you looking forward to you holiday?" she asked him

"Yes…Daddy's gong to take me on some of the rides…and we can also visit the Kennedy Space center…Christopher and me are going to have so much fun" he replied

"Are you looking forward to having a new baby brother or sister" Miss Ellie asked

"Momma says we're going to have three babies" John Ross replied "I'm going to help look after them"

So that was why Clayton was making more than one crib. Why had they told him and not her, did they hate her that much; had she really driven JR away. Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a car coming up the drive. The car stopped and Pam and Christopher got out.

"Hi grandma" Christopher said "Hi John Ross"

"Hi Sweetheart" Miss Ellie replied "Hi Pam"

"Hi Miss Ellie are Sue Ellen and JR ready" Pam asked

Just at that moment JR and Sue Ellen came out. JR piled the suitcases into the car and then the family said their farewells to Miss Ellie and Clayton. Before leaving Pam promised that she would pay Miss Ellie a visit during the next week.

JR and Sue Ellen and the boys landed in Florida shortly before tea time. JR got a hire car and the family traveled to their hotel. After booking into the hotel and getting settled they went for a drive around Orlando to take in some of the sites. They also managed to find somewhere to eat before going back to the hotel. The boys were excited at being on holiday and chatted non stop through dinner. Once they got back inside their hotel suite the boys were told to get ready for bed.

"Momma do we have to?" John Ross asked

"Yes you do" Sue Ellen replied "We're read you a story when you're in bed"

"Yes" Christopher said

"Okay guys get ready for bed" JR said

Once the boys were in their pajamas, Sue Ellen and JR cuddled up with them on their bed as the boys bunk beds were not the most comfortable place to read a story. Afterwards they talked about their plans for the following day.

"What do you want to do tomorrow" JR asked

"I want to see Disneyworld" John Ross said

"So do I" Christopher echoed

"That makes three of us" Sue Ellen said

"Momma what's your favourite cartoon character" John Ross asked

"I don't know…perhaps Snow White because she was woken up by a handsome prince" Sue Ellen replied

"She was also looked after by the seven drawfs" John Ross replied

"Ah but can you name them" Sue Ellen said

"Let me see" John Ross said biting down on his bottom lip as he thought "Dopey, Happy, Sleepy, Sneezy, Grumpy…"

"Two more" Sue Ellen said

"Doc" Christopher said

"Good but who was the last one" Sue Ellen said

"Can't remember" John Ross said

"How about Bashful" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at him and smiled "Very good" she said "So John Ross who is your favorite cartoon character?"

"Peter Pan….because he never grew up and had adventures and fought with Captain Hook" John Ross replied "What about you Christopher"

"Dumbo because he could fly" Christopher replied "Uncle JR what's your favorite cartoon character"

JR thought for a moment. To be honest he had no idea…never having watch cartoons much anyway. "I really don't know there's so many to choose from" he finally said

"Hey it's time to go to sleep" Sue Ellen said

The boys climbed into their bunk beds, John Ross claiming the top one. Sue Ellen and JR kissed both of them goodnight then went and sat down on the sofa in their room. Sue Ellen lay with her head in JR's lap

"I can't believe I don't know any of the cartoon characters" JR said

"It's never too late to learn and we're going to the right place for you to discover everyone's childhood heroes" Sue Ellen smiled

"I can't wait to see their faces tomorrow when we see the magic kingdom" JR said "I think they're just at the right age to enjoy this"

"I think you're going to enjoy this holiday too" Sue Ellen said "Discover the childhood you never had and enjoy watching John Ross enjoy his"

**Southfork**

Miss Ellie sat alone in the living room, looking at the clock on the mantelpiece. Clayton had left shortly after JR and Sue Ellen but still Gary hadn't arrived. She decided to phone him to make sure everything was okay….although she hoped he wasn't at home but on his way down to Southfork. She was surprised when he picked up on the second ring.

"Gary I thought you'd be on your way by now" she said

"Momma there's been a change of plan…we've decided not to come down" Gary replied

"Why" Miss Ellie asked

"Well…hmmm…one of the twins had come down with a cold and we thought it was best not to travel" Gary said

"There's always next week; JR and Sue Ellen are away for three weeks" Miss Ellie said

"Momma…I'm sorry but I don't want to go to Southfork…this is my home and that place only holds bad memories. If you want to see your grandchildren you can always visit us" Garry said

"But…I haven't seen the twins since they were born. I was so looking forward to seeing them" Miss Ellie said

"Sorry momma….look I have to go…I'll talk to you soon. Bye" Gary said

"Bye" Miss Ellie replied and hung up the phone.

She felt tears stinging her eyes, after all the years she spent protecting Gary from Jock he couldn't be bothered to visit her. There was no excuse for him this time…JR was nowhere around. Suddenly she felt the tears flow but she realized that they weren't tears for the son who had just rejected her and told her he was never coming home but for the son who she had rejected; the son she knew would always be there…the son she loved more than anything in this world. The only problem was she never told him that and she wished he was standing in front her now so that she could tell him. She made up her mind that she would talk to JR as soon as he got home…..she would try and explain everything to him and hope he understood her actions.

JR and Sue Ellen were woken early the next morning by the sound of their bedroom door opening. They pretended to be asleep hoping that the two boys would decide to go back to their room. Silently the two boys crept up towards the bed and climbed onto it inching closer to JR and Sue Ellen. JR broke the silence by gentle laughter and switched on the light.

"What have we here?" he said, looking at the bedside table clock he groaned "Guys…it's 4am; it's way too early to get up yet"

"But we can't sleep" John Ross said

Sue Ellen looked at JR and laughed "Come on you two…you can join us in here as long as you're quiet and go back to sleep" she said

"Really" Christopher replied

"Yes" she replied

The boys dived under the covers lying between JR and Sue Ellen.

"Go back to sleep" Sue Ellen whispered as she gently stroked John Ross head; stretching over to Christopher she touched his cheek not wanting to leave him out of any affection. JR moved onto his side and took Sue Ellen's hand, and gazed lovingly at the two boys between them…he smiled as he watched both of them close their eyes and drift back off to sleep again.

"I thought they couldn't sleep" he whispered

"Hmmm" Sue Ellen said "I think it was a case of being in a strange bed and the first night of the holiday…they just wanted our company"

"Sue Ellen I don't think I can go back to sleep now" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "Well there's nothing I can do about that!" she said as much as she would have loved to.

"We should have left them at Southfork" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "Have you never felt so excited that you couldn't sleep" she asked

"Only when I'm lying close to you and thinking of all the things I want to do to you" he replied

"JR…there are children in the room" she laughed "I meant as a child"

JR thought "No I don't think so" he said

"How about at Christmas or birthday?" Sue Ellen asked

"Birthdays were just another day to me…I would get the normal birthday cards and presents but still be expected to help daddy in Ewing Oil after school. I can't ever remember having a birthday party" he replied "As for Christmas it just didn't interest me. I guess I was programmed at a very early age on the importance of building a business"

"Didn't you ever have family holidays?" Sue Ellen asked

"No…daddy was always to busy at work and there was never any time for holidays" JR said

"I remember every summer going down to the beach with momma and daddy when I was very small, before Kristin was born. I remember one afternoon momma was annoyed with daddy so she sulked on the beach all the time we were there, anyway before we left daddy and I went for a swim and he came up with an idea….momma was asleep lying on a beach towel so after our swim we walked back up the beach to collect my bucket, then took it down to the water; daddy filled the bucket and I carried it back up the beach. He then told me that momma needed cooling down so I should pour it over her to make her feel better; so I did…I was three years old and I thought everything daddy said was right" Sue Ellen said

"I bet Patricia loved that!" JR said

"She was fuming; asked daddy what he was playing at" Sue Ellen said "He told her he felt she needed to be cooled down….we just kept laughing at her then suddenly she started laughing and we went down the sea for another swim"

"I can't remember doing anything like that with my parents" JR said

"Don't worry you can do it with your own children; you do realize that those two will want to ride the same rides; see the same things over and over again…" Sue Ellen said

"And I guess we'll have to queue for ages" JR groaned

"Aha" Sue Ellen said

"This isn't going to be too tiring for you….I mean with the babies" JR said

"No…beside after this holiday we'll have a week on the beach where I can relax" she replied "Also there may be times that you can take the boys out on your own…like the Kennedy space centre and I can relax here either in the Sauna or Jacuzzi….it will also give me a chance to phone Dallas and reassure Pam that her son is fine and also phone Clayton and maybe Miss Ellie"

"I wonder how Gary liked spending his first night at Southfork…I bet momma is spoiling the twins rotten" JR said

"I feel guilty that we haven't told her about the triplets….Clayton knows as does Pam and Mark….she's the only one who doesn't" Sue Ellen said

"I feel cut off from her…I always wanted to believe that she really did love me but these past few weeks she's proved she doesn't. All I needed from her was some reassurance and for her to tell me about Digger but she couldn't….I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't had you and John Ross" JR said

"You will always have John Ross and me" Sue Ellen said "In fact John Ross thinks he's got the best daddy in the world"

JR looked at the sleeping boys between them "He said that" JR said

"Yes….the only thing that he's not happy with is the fact you wont let him leave school" Sue Ellen laughed

"I wonder what the triplets will be like!" JR said "Do you think they're be girls or boys"

Sue Ellen smiled "I hope that we'll have two girls and a boy or at least one girl" she said "I don't know if I could cope with four boys!"

JR laughed "I never thought we would ever have another child yet alone three at once" he said

"Yes…three lots of diapers to change…three hungry little mouths to feed…this is going to be hard work" Sue Ellen said "You sure this is what you want"

"Hell yes" JR said "More than anything…I can't wait for this pregnancy to develop so that I get to feel their movement inside of you"

Sue Ellen smiled "hmmmm, you get the easy part" she said

JR held her hand tighter "Hey you need to get some rest….these guys will be awake soon" he said

**Southfork**

Miss Ellie sat alone at the kitchen table….the silence was deafening. Southfork should have been alive with the sound of children; Gary had promised her that he would come down while JR was on holiday but he'd let her down then there was the blood test to consider; the sooner they found out whether Ben Stivers was telling the truth the better. Now the only one who could prove that was Ray, Gary had told her he wasn't interested in finding out whether his father was still alive. Tears formed in her eyes when she thought about JR and Sue Ellen. She couldn't believe how much JR had changed since he and Sue Ellen had got back together…..last year he wouldn't have dreamed of taking a week off from Ewing Oil to go on a family holiday but now he was taking three weeks. She always knew that Sue Ellen was good for JR and these past few weeks she had been proved right. Her thoughts went to John Ross' words…he had told her that there were going to be three babies….why hadn't JR and Sue Ellen told her that…Clayton obviously knew. Had she really pushed them away to the point that they hated her and didn't want her to be part of their family. Tears fell on the table as she struggled to cope with her sense of loneliness….now knowing how JR had felt after she told him about Digger and when she had rejected his questions about his father. She closed her eyes remembering the night she gave birth to JR. It was the happiest day of her life but she was also afraid. She was twenty years old and had lied to Jock…telling him that JR was his but when she looked into JR's eyes she saw Digger. She knew that the reason she had let Jock raise JR was because she needed to forge a bond between them, she didn't want to think of what could happen if Jock ever found out the truth. But she knew there was no bond between JR and Jock; he had always been hard on JR….managing to find fault in him all the time. Nothing JR did was ever good enough for Jock. Her thoughts turned to her own father…Aaron Southworth loved JR and would have hated the way Jock brought him up. She remember how the toddling JR would follow his grandfather around the ranch and how Aaron had loved his little shadow…teaching JR to ride a horse, teaching him to fish and letting him help around the ranch…never shouting at the child even if he was busy. Before he had died Aaron had made Ellie promise that whenever anything happened to her that Southfork would be JR's…she had agreed to it. Now JR would have both Ewing Oil and Southfork.

**Florida**

John Ross and Christopher quickly ate their breakfast while JR and Sue Ellen looked at them amused.

"What's the hurry boys?" JR asked

"We want to get going" John Ross replied

"You two going somewhere that we don't know about" JR said

"Daddy…we're going to Disneyworld" John Ross replied

JR looked at Sue Ellen and winked at her "Well….I'm not sure we can today" he said

"Why not" Christopher said

"I heard on the news earlier that they've had to shut it down for the next two weeks…due to the fear of having two energetic little boys running around the place!" he replied

"JR don't be cruel" Sue Ellen said "However you two we've got plenty of time so eat more slowly"

"Yes momma" John Ross said

Two hours later the family walked through the gates of Disneyworld. John Ross and Christopher's eyes lit up as they looked around.

"Wow, this place is big" John Ross said

"So are the queues"JR replied"Okay where you want to go first

"To the magic kingdom" the boys said in unison.

After getting out of their car they went to look for the monorail to take them to the magic kingdom. After going through the gates JR turned to his son and asked

"Where to first?"

"Can we go to the Swiss Family Robinson House" John Ross said "We watched the video last week at Aunt Pam's, didn't we Christopher"

"Yes" Christopher said

"Okay…let's go" Sue Ellen said

As they neared the Treehouse JR looked up at it "Sue Ellen, as someone who is scared of heights, do you want to go up there" he said

"I've got you to look after me so why not" she laughed

"There's approximately 128 steps to the top" JR said "Come on let's go"

As they climbed the stairway to the top, Sue Ellen gripped JR's hand tightly. She looked straight ahead not wanting to look down for fear of feeling sick. Finally on reaching the top they wandered into the house. JR and Sue Ellen sat down and allowed the boys to explore for a while.

"This sure beats daddy's treehouse" JR laughed

"Hmmm the view is amazing" Sue Ellen replied

"You're not scared being up here are you" JR said

"No…the worst part is the climb up and going down but once I'm inside I feel okay" Sue Ellen said

"I've been reading up about Disney from some brochures I got. Did you know that because of the weight of the walkways, and the number of people visiting the attraction, Disney had a (larger than life) complete tree made out of steel and concrete to provide the attraction support structure, for what would probably be most peoples idea of an ideal tree-house (assuming one exists). The "roots" of the tree poke 42 feet into the ground to support the structure, and the 1,400 branches which stretch out to make up a 90 foot diameter canopy are decorated with 300,000 lifelike polythene "leaves", and the tree is draped with a real variety of Spanish moss for added "realism". The various "rooms" are fully furnished, and each has a supply of running water, which is brought up to the top of the tree by a fascinating waterwheel and pulley system."

Sue Ellen laughed "You have been busy…and I thought you were reading stuff on the oil industry" she said "Have you ever read the book"

"No" JR said

"It was written in 1814 by Johann Wyss about a family shipwrecked on a deserted island. I also saw the film when it came out. Momma took Kristin and me to see it but I think she was too young to enjoy it"

"Have you read it to John Ross yet" JR said

"No" Sue Ellen replied "He's a little bit too young as the moment but in a few years time we will…along with Treasure Island, Peter Pan and Tom Sawyer"

"We" JR said

"Yes; 'we'. I think I've found the perfect way to make sure that John Ross doesn't feel neglected when the triplets are born. First of all we always make sure we help him with his homework and then after the triplets are in bed we read him a story. We just make sure that we make give him a time with us that is 'special' to him, where he's not competing with crying babies. The other thing is that we both spend that time with him and not make it a case of me reading him a story one night and you doing it the next." Sue Ellen replied

"You've got it all worked out haven't you" JR said

"Part of me feels guilty about John Ross….we've put him through hell with our fighting and I just want to make up for all the bad time and let him know how much he means to us" Sue Ellen said

JR kissed her "So do I….looking back on things I think I've loved him from the moment I saw him but I was terrified of showing it in case he wasn't mine and one day was taken away from me. You two are the only people in this world that I'm not scared of showing my emotions to" he said

Sue Ellen moved closer to him and hugged him "We love you so much" she said

Half an hour later John Ross and Christopher came and sat down beside them.

"It's amazing in here…can we make the treehouse at home like this" John Ross said

"I don't know" JR said "It's a bit smaller than this one….but we can definitely make some alterations to it if you like"

"Cool" John Ross said "Now where can we go"

"How about Splash Mountain" Christopher said

"Can we daddy?" John Ross asked

JR looked at Sue Ellen, knowing that he would have to go on the ride with them "I guess so" he said

They found where the attraction was and waited in a queue. Sue Ellen took JR's hat knowing that he was in for a soaking. She couldn't wait to see JR's reaction. Sue Ellen waited outside as the three of them loaded themselves into the boat. JR, John Ross and Christopher watched the scenes from 'Song of the South' pass by them as they journeyed along. They passed through a few twists and turns until finally they were finally back out in daylight. As they began plunging down the slope JR realized that he was going to get wet, in fact he could get very wet. No wonder why Sue Ellen took his hat from him. Finally they hit the water as the ride ended. Once off the ride they walked back to where Sue Ellen was. She smiled as she saw the three of them looking drowned….her face however took on a serious look when she saw JR.

"Did you two enjoy that" she asked

"That was cool…can we do it again" John Ross said

JR looked at Sue Ellen in disgust "You didn't tell me I was going to get wet….how the hell am I supposed to walk round like this all day" he groaned

Sue Ellen smiled "You'll live….just think of it as a big adventure" she said "Now you know why I took you hat"

"Don't suppose we can go back to the hotel so I can change" JR said

"No" Sue Ellen said "Beside your son wants to go back on there at some point and I know you don't want to disappoint him. How about we go and find somewhere to eat"

"Yeah" the two boys shouted.

Having found a restaurant within the Magic Kingdom, the family sat down and ordered something to eat.

"Daddy can we go back on the ride after lunch?" John Ross asked

"We'll see" JR replied, turning to Sue Ellen he whispered "You don't know how lucky you are!"

"Hey boys…why don't you try out a few of the other rides first" Sue Ellen said

"We like that one" Christopher said

"What is it about children and water" JR grumbled

Their lunch arrived and they ate in silence. Sue Ellen glanced occasionally at JR and knew he was still annoyed with getting wet…but she knew how to make him feel better later. After they finished their meal Sue Ellen glanced at the menu for desserts.

"Okay who wants ice cream" she said

"We do" the two boys replied

"What kind" Sue Ellen asked

"I want chocolate" John Ross said

"Me too" Christopher replied

"Okay…I'm going to have vanilla" Sue Ellen said as she glanced at the tomato Ketchup bottle in front of her "What about you JR"

"I might join you in vanilla" He said

When their ice cream arrived JR, Christopher and John Ross watched in horror as Sue Ellen took the tomato ketchup bottle and poured it over her ice cream

"What did you do that for?" JR asked

"Don't know…just craved trying some ketchup with my ice cream" she said

"That is disgusting" John Ross said

"No it isn't why don't you try some" Sue Ellen replied, as she put the ice cream into her mouth.

"Yuck" Christopher said

JR shook his head not quite believing what he was seeing. He knew women had cravings when they were pregnant but surely not Ice cream and tomato ketchup.

After lunch the family went out and wandered around the Magic Kingdom watching the people ride the various attractions. Finally the two boys turned to JR and Sue Ellen and said.

"We want to go back on Splash Mountain"

JR sighed knowing he would get no peace until he did what they wanted. Reluctantly he joined the queue for the ride. For an hour and a half they queue and rode Splash Mountain. Each time they got off JR felt he was wetter than the time before but by the end he was starting to enjoy himself seeing the two boys laugh in a way he'd never heard them laugh before. Finally Sue Ellen walked towards them thinking that maybe JR needed rescuing.

"Hey let's go to Tom Saywers Island" she said, knowing that this would give the boys some time to explore and play on their own while she and JR rested. When they got on the island JR and Sue Ellen went for a drink in a café on the island while John Ross and Christopher went and explored the island.

"Are you okay?" Sue Ellen asked JR

"I'm fine…just a bit wet and tired" he replied "This is harder than a day at Ewing Oil"

"I guess I know where you'd sooner be" she said

"No, you're wrong" he said as he took her hand "I want to be right here with my family"

"They seem to be enjoying themselves" Sue Ellen said

"I don't understand the attraction with that ride…I mean getting soaking wet" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "Don't worry we'll go back to the hotel soon and you can change" she said

Sue Ellen got up and sat on JR's lap not bothering that he was soaked. She just wanted to be close to him. They watched the children laugh and play not realizing that time was slipping by. Before they knew it dusk had fallen and it was time to leave the island.

"Hey guys…it's time to go home" JR called

"Can we come back tomorrow" Christopher asked

"If you're good" JR said

They walked towards Cinderella's castle to watch the evening firework display before setting off for their hotel. JR held Sue Ellen tightly as John Ross and Christopher stood in front of them.

"This is perfect" JR said "I wish we could stay here forever…just you me and the children"

"Mmm" Sue Ellen said "But I think Pam would like Christopher back"

"When you wish upon a star….did you make a wish" JR asked Sue Ellen

Sue Ellen smiled and kissed him "Yes…but I'm not telling you what I wished for"

"Let's go back to the hotel" JR said as the firework display ended

"Tomorrow is another day" Sue Ellen smiled

When they arrived back at the hotel, JR went to take a shower while the boys changed their clothes. After settling the boys in front of the television Sue Ellen joined JR.

"We're not going to be disturbed are we?" JR said

"No" Sue Ellen said "They're watching cartoons. I'm so proud of you…I know you didn't want to ride Splash Mountain but you did for your son"

JR held her tightly as he kissed her passionately

"I don't want John Ross to feel the same way I did about my daddy. I need him to know that I love him and will do anything for him" JR said "Even if it means getting wet. And what about you…I can't believe you put Tomato Ketchup on your ice cream"

Sue Ellen laughed "I just had a craving" she said "It actually tasted good"

"I'll take your word for it" JR laughed

"You do know those two are going to want to do that ride again tomorrow…" she said

"I'll make sure I take some waterproofs" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at JR. Just at this moment she wanted him so badly. "Make love to me JR" she said

JR pulled her closer to him and kissed her "My pleasure" he said

**Southfork (two days later)**

Miss Ellie wandered around the vast land of Southfork. She had been up to the grave and had decided that she didn't want to go back to the house just yet. Her walk took her past the barn and the worker's quarters. She saw that Ben Stivers door was opened, curiosity got the better of her so she went to see if he was there. When she walked in she found the place empty except for the bed and cabinet. It looked as though Ben had left…she noticed an envelope on the bed and went to pick it up. Seeing that it was addressed to her she opened it and began to read. What she read shocked her; Ben Stivers was really Sam Ryder…she recognized his name, he was a foreman on the ranch when her father was alive, someone she had gotten close to and confided in. However he wasn't Jock which meant she had destroyed JR's world for nothing. As she read further she felt tears spring to her eyes. She suddenly remembered how Sam had left the ranch, how Jock had found money in Sam's room and accused him of theft. In the letter Sam explained how Jock had set him up…there was no way he would steal from anyone; how Jock had been jealous of his friendship with Ellie. He had known Ellie's secret and by making her reveal it he had got revenge on her for not supporting him against the bully that was her husband. The letter explained how he had come to have some of Jock's things in his possession. Tears fell on the letter as she read…she couldn't have defended Sam. She couldn't make Jock angry, Southfork needed him to survive. After reading the letter a second time she got up from the bed where she had been sitting, taking the envelope she left the room. As she walked back towards the patio she noticed a car drive through the gates…thinking it might be Clayton she walked quickly to meet it but her hopes were dashed as she realized it was Pam.

"Hi Pam" she said as Pam got out of her car

"Hi Miss Ellie" Pam replied "It's quiet around here…where are Gary and the children"

"Have you got time for a coffee" Ellie said

"Sure" Pam said "Mark's busy at work and I don't have to worry about Christopher"

They walked into the house and the kitchen. After Miss Ellie made them a coffee each they went into the living room.

"Gary didn't come" Miss Ellie said "He told me he's not interested in coming back here as it only holds bad memories for him"

"Where's Clayton" Pam asked

"He's in San Angelo at the Southern Cross" Miss Ellie replied "Dusty's up there too at the moment"

"When will he be back" Pam asked concerned that her former mother-in-law was alone at Southfork.

"Not until the weekend" Miss Ellie replied "In fact I think he might stay up there longer, things haven't been too good between us lately"

"Sue Ellen said that things were a bit difficult here" Pam said "What's been going on"

"Where do I start" Miss Ellie said "All I know is that JR hates me and I don't blame him"

"What has he done now" Pam asked

"It's not him this time…it's me" Ellie said "I've been……..oh I don't know"

"What's wrong" Pam said as she noticed the tears in Ellie's eyes

"A man named Ben Stivers came to work at the ranch….I walked into his room one day and discovered some things that belonged to Jock, including letters I'd written. When I asked him what he was doing with them he told me he they were his and he was Jock, however it turns out he's not Jock…he must have left at some point last weekend but left me this letter" she said as she handed Pam the letter.

Pam started reading the letter "So he was out for revenge, he says he wanted you to lose everything just like he had done and knew that would happen if you revealed the secret that you told him"

"I know" Ellie said "A secret that I swore I would never reveal but when JR started insisting that the only way to discover whether this man was Jock or not was to have a blood test….I couldn't keep it a secret any longer…I had to tell the truth….. because I knew that if the blood test revealed that he was Jock it would also reveal something else"

"So why do you think JR hates you" Pam asked

"I told him……….I told him Jock wasn't his father…that the man he worshipped wasn't his true father" Ellie said "Then when he asked me about his real father I refused to talk to him about it."

"JR isn't the easiest person to talk to" Pam said

"JR thinks I don't love him but that isn't true. When I married Jock I was twenty years old and pregnant with another man's child. I was terrified of what Jock would do if he discovered the truth so I distanced myself from JR and let Jock bring him up…not saying anything when Jock bullied him. I was afraid that if I loved JR too much Jock would discover my secret" Ellie said "I need to put things right before it's too late"

"Who is JR's father then Miss Ellie" Pam asked

"Pam it was a long time ago and I'd sooner not say" Ellie replied

"Daddy once told me you left him to go to Jock….that one minute you were his girl, the next you were married to Jock" Pam said "Is Digger JR's father"

"Pam I was so young and you know Digger…he wasn't exactly reliable….and I knew that if I married Jock then the future of Southfork would be secure. I'm not proud of what I did and if I could turn back time I know I would do things differently" Ellie said

"Daddy thought you had been cheating on him with Jock because JR was born so soon after the two of you got married" Pam said "That's one of the reasons he disappeared from Dallas, because he couldn't bear seeing you and Jock knowing that you'd been together behind his back, probably laughing at him"

"No" Ellie said "I never cheated on Digger. I remember the paternity test results on John Ross when Jock announced Cliff was a liar and John Ross was his grandson. I thought at the time that maybe Cliff was mistaken at being John Ross' father but he was right about Digger being his grandfather. I'm sorry Pam…but whatever you think of me now I did love your father"

Pam took Miss Ellie's hand in hers "It's okay….we all do things we regret" she said

"Pam, this has to be between us….the only people who know are JR, Sue Ellen and Clayton and now you…please don't say anything to Cliff and Mark" Ellie said

"Don't worry I wont" Pam said

"I need to talk to JR and try and explain things to him" Miss Ellie said "They didn't even tell me that Sue Ellen was expecting triplets. I heard the news from my own grandson"

"You can't do anything until they come back from holiday. However why don't you try and contact Clayton…get him to come back early" Pam said

"I'm not sure that he's too impressed with me at the moment" Miss Ellie said

"Give him a phonecall in the meantime why don't you come home with me. Have dinner with Mark and I tonight" Pam said

"I don't know. Mark doesn't want your ex mother-in-law around" Miss Ellie replied "I'll just stay here"

"No" Pam said "You're coming home with me"

"If you're sure I would love to" Miss Ellie said as she stood up and went to hug Pam.

**Florida**

"Daddy, can we go back to Disneyword today?" John Ross asked

"We've been here five days…you sure that there isn't anywhere else you'd rather go" JR replied

"No" Christopher and John Ross said in unison

Sue Ellen laughed "Hey you two why don't you go and get ready while I try to explain to your father why you like Disney so much" she said

After John Ross and Christopher went back into their own room, Sue Ellen put her arms around JR and hugged him tightly.

"I don't get those two" he said "We've been everyday to the Magic Kingdom but they're not tired of it yet….I mean we've done the same things over and over again"

"You just don't like getting wet do you" she laughed

JR kissed her "I don't mind getting wet…especially if I happen to be in the shower with you" he said

"Don't worry after next week we can relax on the beach" Sue Ellen said

"The boys seem to be enjoying themselves…we should have done this years ago" JR said

"I think John Ross would have been too young to enjoy it" Sue Ellen said "I thought you could take them to the Kennedy Space Centre tomorrow on your own as I promised to phone Pam sometime"

"I don't know….I'm not sure I can deal with those two on my own" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "Hey…I thought the great JR Ewing could cope with anything, I'm sure he's not going to let two children get the better off him" she said

"This past week I realized how much I've missed out not being able to enjoy being a child. I don't think I've ever had so much fun even if I spent most of it getting wet" JR said "And don't think I didn't notice you taking photographs of us as we came off 'Splash Mountain' soaking wet"

"Aha" Sue Ellen laughed "Thought I might send them to the newspaper…might make a few people smile" she said

JR tickled her "It's a good job you're pregnant" he said "I would have been making you do all those rides with me. In fact we're coming back next year and I'm going to watch you get soaking wet on 'Splash Mountain'"

Sue Ellen laughed "I don't think so…" she replied "Not with these three to look after" she said patting her stomach.

JR held her tightly "Guess we're also going to have to put off renewing our vows" he said

"Not necessarily" Sue Ellen said "I'm three and a half months pregnant now and I think these babies are going to have to be delivered early so they could be born by the beginning of November"

"Isn't that dangerous?" JR asked "I mean look what happened with John Ross"

"This time is going to be so different…I plan on listening to what the doctors say and taking care of myself or rather let you do that" she said "However John Ross survived"

"That child was a miracle….he was so tiny when he was born" JR said

"I still feel so guilty about the months after his birth. For a start not going to visit him in hospital….Pam was the first member of the family to give him a bottle but it should have been me, then there were the months I couldn't touch him because I feared that if I let myself love him he'd hurt me…it took a long time to realize that the one person that could never hurt me was him" Sue Ellen said

JR noticed the tears in her eyes and hugged her "It's okay…." he said "Its in the past…John Ross knows how much we both love him and that we will do anything for him"

"I know….I guess that time has been playing on my mind a lot lately" she said

JR smiled "Speaking of our beloved son, we better see what those two are up to…it's far too quiet in there" he said

JR and Sue Ellen walked hand in hand into the boys' room.

"Hey are you two ready?" Sue Ellen said

"Yeah we're waiting for you" John Ross said

"Okay…let's go" JR said

**Southfork**

Miss Ellie sat alone in the living room reading a book. This past week time had gone so slowly for her….she had never felt so alone. Her thoughts wandered to JR and she wondered what he was doing, whether he was enjoying his holiday or longing to be back at Ewing Oil. She was still upset that they hadn't told her about the triplets but in a way she understood why they had kept it from her. Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a car driving up the drive. She stood up and was relieved to see Clayton get out of a taxi. She went outside to greet him.

"Hey Clayton, it's good to have you back" she said

Clayton looked around him "This place seems quiet where is everyone" he said

"Why don't you take your things upstairs and I'll make you a coffee "Ellie replied

"Okay, I'll see you shortly" Clayton said kissing her on the cheek"

**Disneyworld Florida**

"Okay where too first guys" JR said "And don't your dare say 'splash mountain'"

"Can we go on the 'Big Thunder Mountain Railroad?' "John Ross asked

"Don't see why not" JR said "At least I can stay dry for this one"

Sue Ellen watched JR and the boys queue up for the ride…she smiled as she saw JR hold both boys hand as they moved towards the ride. Her thoughts returned to the conversation she had earlier with JR, and although she knew it was foolish going over the past…part of her couldn't help but feel guilty about her treatment of both JR and John Ross after his birth. She remembered waking up in hospital and feeling JR's hand tightly holding hers, she looked at him and noticed that he looked tired and unshaven. For one whole week he had sat in her room with her trying to talk to her and not getting angry when she didn't reply. Part of her had known that he had wanted to put things right but she had pushed him away and finally when he could take no more he fell into the arms of Kristin. The days after she returned home from the hospital he had been so gentle to her; so patient and yet she had rejected him….she had to she couldn't let herself get close to anyone again not even her son. Then when they had gone to the hospital to pick up John Ross and found out that he had been kidnapped he did everything he could to comfort her…..she believed that he would have accepted John Ross as his if she had allowed him to make up for all the hurt he had caused but then again John Ross was his…she knew that…she just tried to make herself believe that he wasn't. Her thoughts when to her son…the tiny precious helpless baby she had rejected…the nights she had lay in bed listening to his crying, wanting desperately to block it out….relieved when he stopped after Pam or the nurse had picked him up. For over four months she had allowed Pam to be a mother to him but she also thought of the times she would wander into the nursery and watch him sleep…desperately wanting to pick him up but too afraid to do so. She remembered the look of heartbreak on Pam's face when she finally managed to pick him up. She hated the way she had behaved back then but there were so many emotions going through her, she didn't know how she felt. She looked at JR as he climbed into the ride…..the one thing she always knew was that JR would be a good father and she had been right. From the moment he first knew that John Ross was his son he had adored him….if only he had had the father that John Ross has then maybe things would have been different. Her heart felt full of love as she watched her husband and son on the ride. It had taken them fourteen years but finally they had a secure marriage….nothing could ever separate them again.

**Southfork**

Miss Ellie and Clayton sat in the living room, an uncomfortable silence filled the air neither one knowing what to say, finally Clayton decided he needed to break the ice.

"So where is everyone" He asked "I mean don't tell me Gary and Val have gone"

"They never came" Miss Ellie said " I telephoned Gary on Sunday evening and he told me they had changed their minds….Southfork holds too many bad memories for them"

"I'm sorry Ellie, I know how much you wanted to see them" Clayton said

"No…I'm sorry…..these past few weeks I've made such a mess of things" Miss Ellie said "I've pushed away the people I love"

"Ellie….I just find it hard to understand how you can't love your own son" Clayton said "For the first time ever I felt sorry for JR; he needed you and you rejected him"

"I….I just feel so confused…I don't know how to explain how I feel" Miss Ellie said

"Try" Clayton replied

Miss Ellie closed her eyes…too many thoughts crowded her head, most of them about JR.

"Clayton I was so young and scared when JR was born….I was twenty years old married to a man I didn't love and managed to convince him that the baby I was carrying was his when I knew it wasn't. I was terrified of what would happen if he found out….what he would do. I think that fear stopped me from loving JR. I told you I didn't feel the same way about him as I felt about Bobby or Gary; what I feel for him is stronger….he is the only thing I have left of Digger. I love JR so much but I've always been scared to tell him. When he was little I let my daddy take care of him….JR loved following him around the ranch, then when Daddy died I let Jock take him into Ewing Oil; I thought it was better to keep my distance from him..that way we would both be safe. I'm not happy about the way Jock brought him up….he created a power crazed monster who would stop at nothing to get what he wanted; I hated standing there and saying nothing while Jock bullied him or made him feel worthless. I look at John Ross now and I see a six year old JR pleading to be allowed go and play with his friends and being told that he had to learn the oil business" Ellie said

"Why did you tell me you didn't love him?" Clayton said

"I didn't say I didn't love him I just told him that what I felt for him was different to what I felt for Bobby and Gary; it was you who came to the conclusion that I didn't love him" she replied

"You told me that if it had been Bobby or Gary who had been upset you would have been able to comfort them but you couldn't do the same for JR" Clayton said "Why?"

"Because for so many years I've convinced myself that I loved the other two more; that JR was undeserving of my love; he was just a selfish, arrogant man just like Jock before him." Ellie said

"Have you ever thought that maybe the reason that JR turned out the way he did was because he wasn't shown any affection as a child. Jock taught him that the most important thing was power and that was all that mattered to him" Clayton said "Have you ever told JR you loved him?"

Miss Ellie shook her head "No…as he was growing up I was too scared to get close to him then as he became more ruthless it was easy not to like him….he became less and less Digger's son and more like Jock was in the early days. He made it very easy for me to pretend I didn't love him" she said

"But you do love him?" Clayton asked

"More than anything" Miss Ellie said "I spent the last week wishing that you were here as well as JR, Sue Ellen and John Ross….I think I realized that hidden deep inside of me there's a stronger bond between me and JR than Gary and me. I just let everyone assume that Gary was my favourite"

"You're going to have to talk to JR or you're going to lose him forever" Clayton said "He's talking about leaving Dallas"

"What, when did that happen?" Ellie asked

"He asked me if I would let him buy the Southern Cross a while back…I told him I'd think about it" Clayton said

"Southfork is his home" Ellie said

"Ellie…he no longer wants to play second best and he certainly doesn't want his family to be treated in that way. He's also thinking about the future and feels that when Gary inherits Southfork the first thing he'll do is throw JR and his family off the ranch…JR would sooner find somewhere else to live now than wait for that to happen" Clayton said

"But…Gary isn't going to inherit Southfork" Ellie said "I promise my daddy before he died that Southfork would be JR's…..he made me promise that it would never get into the hands of the Ewings"

"But JR is a Ewing" Clayton said

"In name only….daddy knew that Digger was JR's father" Ellie said "He wasn't happy with what I did even if I did do it to save Southfork"

"I think you need to talk to JR" Clayton said

"He hates me…he didn't even tell me about the triplets…I heard about them from my own grandson" Ellie said "Did you know?"

"I was there when they came back from the hospital and we chatted about it…JR asked me not to tell you" Clayton said "I wanted to but I had to respect his views"

"There's something else….Ben Stivers has left Dallas and before he did he left me this letter" she said handing him the letter she had left on the table.

Clayton took the letter and read it "Oh Ellie….I can't believe this, you needn't have told JR anything" he said

"Do you think he'll forgive me" Ellie said

Clayton smiled "I think so and I'm sure Sue Ellen can make him see your point of view" he said

"I think those two are going to make their marriage work this time" Ellie said "I was watching them from the window before they left on holiday and they looked so happy"

"They are happy" Clayton said "And looking forward to the new babies"

"I just hope they don't make the mistakes I made" Ellie said sadly.

**Disney Florida**

After a day spent at the Magic Kingdom again JR and Sue Ellen sat outside the café and Tom Saywers Island watching John Ross and Christopher play.

"I'll be glad when we get to the beach" JR said "This past week has been exhausting"

"I know but at least I've got some wonderful pictures" Sue Ellen said "I especially love the ones of you riding the Mad Hatter Tea cups with the boys"

"Hmmm I think I'm going to have to confiscate those pictures; can't have my reputation ruined can I" JR laughed "Actually I've really enjoyed this week…playing with the boys; taking them on the rides….even the teacups were fun"

Sue Ellen reached out her hands and touched JR's arms "I'm so proud of you, I love you so much and I know this time our marriage is going to work" she said "I was thinking earlier about John Ross and my behaviour after his birth"

"You're not still torturing yourself over that are you?" JR said "I told you it's in the past"

"I can't reconcile the fact that I rejected my own child…he needed me but I ignored him…then there was you…those first few weeks after I came out of hospital you did everything you could to try and make things right but I didn't meet you half way…if only I had done things differently" Sue Ellen said

"Darlin' you had been through a traumatic time; both Cliff and I treated you badly I'm not surprised you behaved the way you did, but the important thing is that you managed to bring yourself to love your son before he was old enough to realize what was happening around him!" JR said "And despite what I have said in the past I know you are the better parent…because you consider his needs before your own"

"Do you remember when we almost lost Southfork before the Asian wells came in" Sue Ellen said

"How could I forget" JR said

Sue Ellen bit her bottom lip "I knew you were afraid of what was going to happen and for a moment I fell in love with you…I think if you had opened your arms out to me for comfort I would have given myself to you but then the Asian Wells came in and you went back to being the same old JR Ewing and I depressed whatever feelings I had for you" she said

"I remember you telling me that you thought I was afraid but I just thought you were trying to annoy me, make me angry" JR said

"No…I wanted to comfort you…I wanted to tell you that even if you lost Southfork you wouldn't lose me" she said

"Do you realize how foolish we've been" JR said

"Yes" Sue Ellen smiled

"Come on let's get the boys and go back to the hotel…it's getting late" JR said

After collecting the boys and watching the end of day fireworks they went happily back to the hotel. When they got into their room Sue Ellen decided to phone Pam while JR read the boys a story. After listening to Pam tell her what had been happening in Dallas Sue Ellen went into the boys room and joined them to listen to JR's story. Afterwards they tucked the boys in, then went and sat cuddled up on the sofa in their hotel room.

"What did Pam have to say?" JR asked

"She asked after Christopher, wanted to know if he was okay" Sue Ellen said "So I told her about you looking after the boys going on all the rides with them…she didn't believe me of course but I said I'd let her see the pictures"

"Has she been to Southfork?" JR asked

"She went a few days ago" Sue Ellen said "She had a chat to Miss Ellie"

"I suppose it's a bit hectic there at the moment with the twins" JR said

"Darlin' Gary didn't turn up…Miss Ellie phoned him on the Sunday evening and he told her that they had changed their minds…..she's been alone for most of the time but Pam seemed to think that Clayton would be back soon" Sue Ellen said "Another thing is Ben Stivers has left Dallas and he isn't Jock…Pam said he's someone who knew Miss Ellie years ago…used to work on the ranch when your grandpa was alive and she confided in him about Digger. Jock didn't like their friendship and got him thrown off the ranch and made sure he was never able to work in Dallas again, he had a vendetta against the Ewings and wanted to see Ellie pay for allowing Jock to fire him"

"How much does Pam know" JR said "I mean…what does she know about Digger"

"She knows that he's your father…but I know she wont say anything especially to Cliff" Sue Ellen said "Also Miss Ellie knows about the triplets"

"What!" JR said "Did Pam tell her"

"No….she asked John Ross how he felt about having a little brother or sister and he told her that we had told him there were three babies" Sue Ellen said

"I've made a mess of things….I guess she's angry at me" JR said

"I get the impression from Pam that she's angry at herself" Sue Ellen said "You need to talk to her when we get back"

"I don't know if I can" JR said

"Hey you're not alone…I'm with you every step of the way" Sue Ellen said

JR kissed her "Thankyou" he said "Thank you for always being here when I need you, for being the mother of my children and most of all for being the best friend a man could ever have" he said

"Do you know how often I've dreamed about us finally having a real marriage filled with love and children….all I have ever wanted was you and now all my dreams have come true…I love you…I love our son and I know I'm going to love these babies when they're born" Sue Ellen said

JR held her tightly "It's taken me a lifetime to realize that the only person I need was the woman standing beside me…you are the other half of me…you can make the sun shine when days are grey; with you by my side I can do anything" He said "And I want to be there for you, to share this pregnancy with you, even watch while our children are being born…I never want you to feel the pain of being alone like you did when you were pregnant with John Ross. I want the rest of our lives to be perfect"

"It will be" Sue Ellen said "Hey I've decided to come to the Kennedy Space center with you tomorrow"

"I thought you wanted to rest" JR said

"I can rest on the beach….I just don't want to spend anytime without you or the boys. I want this to be a real family holiday…to strengthen the love we have for each other" Sue Ellen said

JR kissed her "I think it's time for bed" he said

Sue Ellen laughed "You have some excellent ideas" she said "Make love to me…I want to feel you close to me"

JR got up off the sofa and held out his hand for Sue Ellen then carrying her in his arms he took her to the bedroom gently laying her on the bed he gently and slowly made love to her; giving himself completely to her knowing that if there was one person in this world he could trust it was her.

Sue Ellen and JR spent the next day taking John Ross and Christopher around the Kennedy Space Centre. Sue Ellen noticed how the boys' eyes lit up when they saw pictures of space rockets and astronauts. She also saw how interested JR was during the tour; this holiday had been so good for him, for both of them. With Dallas and Ewing Oil miles away JR had managed to relax, she even thought that perhaps Disney had brought out the child in him and allowed him to discover childhood through his son's eyes. She smiled as she thought about the first time JR had stepped off 'Splash Mountain' completely soaked, she knew he wasn't happy especially as he couldn't go and changed but she had also sensed something else in him, she and the children had been laughing at him; she knew he was upset and angry but seeing them happy had soften his mood and soon he was laughing with them. Then there was the time on the 'Mad Hatter's Teacups', JR's face had said it all; there was no way he had ever imagined himself riding about on a cup and was just praying that noone he knew saw him but at the end of the day she knew he'd enjoyed himself in fact the following evening they had spent time cuddled up on their bed with the boys reading 'Alice in Wonderland'. JR interrupted Sue Ellen's thoughts by kissing her on the cheek and saying.

"Hey is this boring you"

Sue Ellen looked and smiled at him "No, I was just thinking" she replied

"About what?" JR said

"You" She smiled "I think you've enjoyed this holiday, being able to forget about the Oil Business and concentrating on your family"

JR laughed "Well Ewing Oil is a lot less tiring" He said "I thought people went on holidays to relax"

"Oh we'll be relaxing soon don't worry, or rather I will be while you entertain the kids on the beach" Sue Ellen said

"I'm still not sure this Disney holiday was right for you in your condition…I mean you haven't been able to enjoy it as much as the boys and I have. You haven't been able to go on any of the rides" JR said

"Believe me that doesn't bother me at all!" she said "I've enjoyed seeing you having fun and not being tied down with all the stresses of work"

Suddenly their conversation was interrupted by their son.

"Momma I want to be an astronaut when I'm older" John Ross said

Sue Ellen laughed

"I thought you wanted to be an Oilman like me" JR said

"No daddy that's boring being an astronaut would be so cool" John Ross replied

Sue Ellen saw the look of hurt on JR's face but she also knew her son.

"Yeah right" she said "What was it last week John Ross? I know you wanted to be Peter Pan, then before that you wanted to be a fireman then a doctor and I do believe that at some point you wanted to be a pirate. It's a good job you've got a few years to make up your mind as to what you want to do"

"Momma!" John Ross said "I do want to be an astronaut and go up in space to discover more planets…I could name one after me"

"Planet John Ross EwingIII" Sue Ellen said "Guess it has a ring to it!"

"They named one after Pluto" John Ross said "So why not me"

Sue Ellen laughed "Just think in another thirty years time we may be able to have holidays in space. I'm sure someone will come up with the idea of taking people to visit other planets" she said

"Two week holiday on Mars" JR said "Wonder what there is up there"

"That's what I'm going to find out daddy" John Ross

JR felt crushed the realization that he was not his son's hero was hard for him to take. The only thing he wanted was for John Ross to love him as much as JR had loved Jock but he now knew John Ross didn't. surely if he loved JR he would want to be like him follow in his footsteps but he wanted to be an astronaut and thought the oil business was boring. Sue Ellen saw the pain in JR's eyes and squeezed his hand, instinctively she knew what he was thinking but now was not the right time to discuss it.

"Hey you guys, I'm starving" Sue Ellen said "How about we go and find someplace to eat"

"Can we just stay a little longer" Christopher asked.

"Okay" Sue Ellen sighed

After a tiring day traipsing around the Kennedy Space Center Sue Ellen was relieved when finally her and JR were back in the hotel room and the boys were asleep after having a story read to them. She was longing for the beach and was glad that they only had a few days left in Florida. Leaning against JR she closed her eyes.

"It's been a long day" JR said "You look exhausted"

"I'm fine" Sue Ellen said "Just the triplets are beginning to make their presence felt"

The room went silent for a while both deep in thought.

"What are you thinking?" Sue Ellen asked

"Nothing" JR said

Sue Ellen turned and faced him, taking his face in her hands she tenderly kissed his lips. "I know you" she said

"Meaning?" JR asked

"Talk to me JR…tell me what's bothering you" Sue Ellen said

JR sighed "I don't know I guess I'm being stupid" he said "But when John Ross said that he wanted to be an astronaut and the Oil Business was boring I felt crushed. Sue Ellen, I want to be his hero; the one he looks up to, the one he wants to be like. I feel as though even he doesn't really love me"

"JR that's not true….you are his hero and I know how much he loves you. All he's doing is dreaming it's what every child does. Somedays you want to be Superman or Spiderman then there's times you want to be an astronaut, firemen, doctor, knight in shining armour, it depends what mood takes you. Tomorrow something else will capture his imagination and being an astronaut will be forgotten but the one thing that is constant is you…his father, the person who tucks him in at night; reads him a story; helps him with his homework even does it for him if he manages to twist you around his finger. His talk of astronauts is fantasy, make believe but I know if he lost you he'd be devastated. JR let him have his dreams it's what being a child is about but don't ever think he doesn't love you" Sue Ellen said

"But when I was his age…the only thing I dreamed about what being like Jock, and being the greatest oilman ever just like my father, he was my hero" JR said

"Because that was all you knew; you were taught that the greatest thing in life was being an oil man, that power and money was the be all and end all of life, it gave you the power to have whatever you wanted but that isn't how we've brought up John Ross; we've allowed him to discovers other things; taught him that there are other things in life. He really is just living through his fantasies" Sue Ellen said

"I love him" JR said

"I know….I never doubted that" Sue Ellen said "Trust me he loves you too"

"So what did you want to be when you were a child?" JR asked

Sue Ellen sighed "I don't know, I guess Cinderella and have some handsome prince rescue me from momma" she said "To live happily ever after just like in the fairytales. Or to be Snow White and be kissed awake by a handsome prince and then ride off into the sunset. Sometimes I used to dream about being a nurse married to a handsome doctor, I don't know I guess from an early age the only thing that mattered was finding prince charming" she said

"But you never found him" JR said

"JR stop it" she laughed as she tickled him

"Talking about 'Knights in shining armour'" JR said "I was thinking about Dusty"

Sue Ellen looked at him "You were thinking about Dusty…thought that was my job" she laughed but seeing the serious look in his face she asked "What about him?"

"I just wondered what you liked about him. I seem to remember trying to be so nice to you after you came out of hospital but you were just so closed off then he turned up at the rodeo and I saw something in your eyes that I hadn't seen for a long time" JR said

"It's in the past JR" Sue Ellen replied

"Tell me about him" JR said

Sue Ellen closed her eyes, a warm feeling ran through her as she thought of Dusty and how he had made her feel; the same way she felt now with JR; safe and loved.

"Please…I just want to understand" JR said

Sue Ellen kissed him "I love you" she said

"I know" JR said "Talk to me"

Sue Ellen cuddled up closer to JR and he held her tightly "Okay" she said "After John Ross was born I put up so many barricades to stop myself being hurt again. I felt worthless and incapable of love, I didn't want you being nice to me and I definetly didn't want Cliff and to make matters worse I rejected my own son causing the Ewings to think of me as a bad mother. I remember going into town with Bobby while preparations were going on for the Rodeo; the noise was giving me a headache and I wanted to get far away from John Ross' crying. Anyway Bobby and I had arranged to meet at Hector's, when I got there I was loaded down with packages and dropped them, Dusty picked them up for me. I remember looking at his face and into his eyes and suddenly I felt something that I hadn't felt in ages. I felt a connection. Then he turned up at the Rodeo and we spent a lot of time just talking; he just…….he made me feel like a person again and not an object. To him I wasn't Mrs JR Ewing. After the Rodeo I remember visiting the café where I knew he had breakfast every single day for a week just to see him, to talk to him then he turned up and I felt my heart jump"

"Did it help that he was rich…that his family owned the Southern Cross?" JR asked "He was worthy of your affections"

"At that time money didn't come into it. I would have felt the same way if he had been the poor lowly cowboy he was pretending to be. I knew what money could do, the unhappiness it brought and I didn't want another relationship like that. I remember one day I met him and he told me that he was going to help me fly…to break the ties that bound me, I told him that I was just learning to walk again and he asked me if I'd ever thought of doing something crazy like scaling the Reunion Tower from the outside. He had this aura around him, nothing fazed him' he believed he could do anything; he believed I could do anything. He told me that if I wanted to leave you he'd help me; I remember asking him what made him think I'd leave you for him and he told me he didn't mean leave you for him but if I wanted to leave for any reason he'd be there for me. I think the thing about Dusty was that he made me feel special; I wasn't a possession, an object to be paraded about on your arm whenever you felt the need; I was a person in my own right with the right to be what I wanted. When he looked at me he didn't see Mrs JR Ewing; he saw me, Sue Ellen, a sad lonely person" Sue Ellen said

"You weren't an object to me Sue Ellen…I…I did love you" JR said

"You once said to me that all I was to you was another Ewing possession easily disposed off" Sue Ellen said "And I knew that was true…..I mean I always felt that all I was to you was Miss Texas. Dusty showed me that I was so much more than that"

"I remember that time so clearly….you just looked so happy and in love" JR said

Sue Ellen closed her eyes "Because I was….Dusty made me feel alive and between him and Dr Elby I began to trust again and then I felt able to hold my baby. Everyone thought that I didn't care about John Ross; I remember Lucy telling me that she was going to teach John Ross how to live without his parents and make the whole world pay but I told her I loved John Ross. God I had so many overpowering feelings for him, feelings I can't describe but I tried to shut them out; in the beginning I also shut out what I felt for Dusty….I was so scared of being hurt"

"When did you first sleep with him….I mean how soon after the rodeo" JR asked

"JR please." Sue Ellen said

JR kissed her "It's okay….I'm just want to understand you and what was going through your mind at that stage" he said

"In the beginning our relationship was not about sex; believe it or not the first time I slept with him was the night all hell broke loose with Cliff's revelation about being John Ross' father. At first Dusty and I just used to sit and talk holding each other; for me it was a journey of discovery, finding out who I was and who I wanted to be. He didn't push me into sleeping with him; he was the perfect gentleman waiting until I was ready for the next step in our relationship. He never pressurized me into doing anything I didn't want to" she said

"What was he like…as a lover?" JR asked

"God JR…is this turning you on or something" Sue Ellen laughed

"No…I just need to know about my rival and what you saw in him" JR replied

"He was warm, loving, affectionate, strong, gentle and would do anything he could to please me" Sue Ellen said "He even went back to the Southern Cross to work with his father so that he could build a home for me…for us"

"What about John Ross?" JR asked

"He would have brought John Ross up as his son" Sue Ellen said

"The night you asked me for the divorce….I remember you going out and thinking that you may not come back…part of me felt sick, I never thought that you would ever leave; that I could do whatever I wanted and you would put up with it because you valued the Ewing name" JR said "I remember going into John Ross' room and picking him up, holding him close to me, I felt sad, empty and alone. I didn't want you to go" JR said

"I couldn't leave…not without John Ross and Dusty knew that. He accepted that and was prepared to wait until I was ready. I remember the stupid plan I had of being the best wife, the best mother in public just so that I would win custody of my son but behind closed doors I wanted nothing to do with you. Then I remember one afternoon talking to Bobby and he told me to do what I had to and not play your games because you couldn't be beaten you were too clever. I knew he was right and it was then that I decided I had to leave, so I phoned Dusty and we arranged to meet at the condo. Then the plane crash happened and my world fell apart….the man that had given me hope when all I felt was darkness and despair was gone and that is when I started drinking again" Sue Ellen said

"Kristin and I devised a plan to make people believe that you were drinking again….I was so scared of you taking John Ross" JR said

"The drink she poured over me that wasn't an accident was it JR?" Sue Ellen said

"No" JR admitted

"Did you know that it was the Farlows' who put up bail after I was arrested for your shooting" Sue Ellen asked "Once again my knight in shining armour came to my defense"

"I didn't know that" JR said "When did you find out he was still alive?"

"I remember feeling that I was being followed and then discovered it was him who was having me followed" Sue Ellen said

"Is that when you left me" JR asked

"No…that was a few months earlier….I remember going to the house where they were staying and Dusty telling me that he wanted to make sure I was alright but with him being in a wheelchair we didn't have a future" Sue Ellen said "I felt devastated like I had lost him again. Then a few months later he turned up again this time without the wheelchair telling me that he loved me and needed me. That's all I needed to hear. I remember going back to Southfork, it was late at night and I knew you wouldn't be back that night so I packed John Ross' clothes and prepared to leave. Luckily there was noone in that house because John Ross chatted away all the way down the stairs"

"I came back" JR said

"Yes and you took him from me" Sue Ellen said "I was still determined to have Dusty and my son and that's when I turned to Pam and pleaded with her to bring John Ross to me"

"I remember gong down to the Southern Cross to get my son back and was shocked by how close you two were. He was so protective of you" JR said

"He was someone who couldn't be scared off….he wasn't another Cliff, this time you had met your match" Sue Ellen said

"I remember telling Clayton that if he didn't make you and John Ross leave the Southern Cross that I would destroy him and he told me that you meant everything to his son and there was no way he was handing you two back to me" JR said "For the first time I felt powerless"

"However at the end of the day, Dusty felt tied down and chose the Rodeo over me. Once he got the strength to walk again he needed to be free and that was the end for us. Then he got married and once again my heart broke" Sue Ellen said

"If he hadn't of been married and wanted you back would you have gone?" JR asked "I mean we were close again"

"I think so….I mean I was still upset with what you did to Cliff and Dusty was so different" Sue Ellen said "Then after John Ross' appendectomy he came back; you had treated me so horribly, blamed me for it and I begged Clayton to arrange a meeting between Dusty and me. Then after Bobby's death I went on a drinking binge; I remember him slapping me one night because I wouldn't leave the bar I was in. He wanted to help but I think I was beyond help at that point"

"I remember seeing you in the Sanitarium with him crawling all over you…telling you that he would make things right…I was so angry…we got into a fight and then we heard you scream. You were wild, frightened and I think it terrified us both" JR said

"Once again he wanted to save my life but I think I was wary of him as I knew that at some point he'd return to the Rodeo" Sue Ellen said

"And you wouldn't go with him" JR said

"I wouldn't leave John Ross" Sue Ellen said "He was the most important person to me"

"What are your feelings about him now?" JR asked

"That's difficult to explain" Sue Ellen began "He will always be special to me…he taught me how to love and trust people again. I consider him a very good friend and he happens to be your stepbrother"

"But do you still love him?" JR asked

"Not in the way I did….he's walked out on me too many times" Sue Ellen said "But I look at you now and you remind me of him. Seeing you these past few months….you've been gentle, considerate, loving and the most important thing of all faithful. That is all I ever wanted from you. Dusty is in the past and you are my future….a future that I'm looking forward to knowing that this time we're going to make it"

"I couldn't bear losing you to him again" JR said

"Hey it's not going to happen" Sue Ellen said "I love you and only you"

"How do you feel about Clayton? You know he was in love with you to" JR said

"You really are feeling insecure aren't you" Sue Ellen laughed "I always thought of Clayton as a father figure, he looked out for me after the divorce and when Dusty left. What ever his feelings were for me I don't ever think I felt that way about him. For goodness sake he was Dusty's father that would be like you falling in love with my mother"

"Well I hate to say it but your mother is a mighty attractive woman" JR laughed

Sue Ellen gently hit him "Yeah well we know how much you like to keep things in the family" she said

"Ouch" JR said "Guess I deserved that one"

"We're going to need Clayton and Miss Ellie with the triplets on their way. One baby is hard work but three is going to be tough. We're in for sleepless nights but this time I want us to go through this together and not leave it to a nurse" Sue Ellen said "I hate what happened with John Ross the fact that Pam cared for him the first months of his life. He was my baby but I was a complete stranger to him."

"That's fine by me" JR said

"We need to think of baby names" Sue Ellen said "Both boys and girls"

"We could have three boys" JR said

"No I want two girls and one boy, that way we'll have two of each" Sue Ellen said

"Okay what do you think about boys names" JR asked

"Dusty" Sue Ellen said with a serious look on her face just to see JR's reaction.

"Tell me you're joking" JR said

"What do you think" Sue Ellen said "However I was thinking of Aaron Southworth Ewing after your grandfather"

"Really" JR said

"It just he's the only person who loved you while you were growing up and I just thought it would be great to name our son after him" Sue Ellen said

"Mmm you're right…we never got to choose a name for John Ross" JR said "Jock just took it for granted that we'd name him after him"

"We name him after you sweetheart" Sue Ellen replied "Not after Jock"

"Okay what about girls names" JR said

"That is difficult the names I like we can't use for obvious reasons" Sue Ellen said "However what about Eleanor?"

"I don't know…..it's not like momma actually loved me so why should we call our daughter after her, how about Patricia" JR said

"No…too old fashioned" Sue Ellen replied "JR I want to find out what's going on in Miss Ellie's head….I want to know what her real feelings you are."

"She hates me, I drove her precious Gary away" JR said

"I don't believe that….there's more to it than that" Sue Ellen said "Anyway let's get back to choosing names…how about Sophie or Sarah, Robin, Suzanne"

"We could call her after you?" JR said

"Actually Ellen is nice" Sue Ellen said "I think we should think about it some more and maybe find a baby name book to help us"

"Good idea" JR said "Now let's get back to our earlier conversation"

"Hey I thought we had finished that…I mean I told you everything about Dusty and my feelings for him…there's nothing more to say except it's over. We're together, with all my heart I love you and I hope you feel the same" Sue Ellen said

"I can't believe I almost lost you to a cowboy" JR said "Mind you he definitely taught you a few tricks in the bedroom…I must thank him for that"

"JR!" Sue Ellen said "Beside what makes you think he taught me anything…it could have been Cliff" she laughed

"NO! Please don't tell me you let him…no please.. that is just to sick too imagine" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed

"Sue Ellen I always thought you were too much of a lady to do things like that. I wouldn't have dreamed of asking you to do things…" JR began

"That you got your tarts to do for you" Sue Ellen interrupted

"Sue Ellen they mean't nothing" JR said

"Okay…we have spent the past hour talking about Dusty and my relationship I'm turning the tables, tell me about yours….I want to know everything" Sue Ellen said

"Darlin' I love you…I don't want to go through those times again" JR said

"Sweetheart….this holiday has been perfect and talking about Dusty tonight has cleared the air…you know everything..why I fell in love with him…why I needed him and by talking about your relationships we can try and reconcile the past, lay it to rest forever so that there are no bad memories between us" Sue Ellen said

"I don't want to hurt or ruin what we have now by bringing up the past" JR said

"You won't…have your feelings about me changed because of what I told you about Dusty" Sue Ellen asked

"No" JR said "I'm just glad you chose me over him"

Sue Ellen took JR's hand and placed it on her stomach "JR inside here and lying asleep in the next room is the proof of our love. They were created out of love… a love that is now stronger than ever, I just want to understand why you did what you did and then put it to rest and move on with our lives."

"Where do I start" JR said

"At the beginning" Sue Ellen said

JR pulled her into a tight embrace and kissed her "I love you more than anything in this world. Without you these past few weeks would have been unbearable and anything I tell you now is not important. The only woman who is important to me is you"

"I believe you…don't worry whatever you tell me wont change anything…nothing is gong to part us again and when we renew our vows this time we know that everything that happened before is dead and our future is to move forward together with our children" Sue Ellen said

JR closed his eyes…thinking of the other women in his life made him realize that there had only ever been one woman in his life and she was lying next to him. Sue Ellen had his heart and no woman could ever take that from her. Giving a sigh he began to speak!

"Okay in the beginning I guess there was Julie" JR said

"Oh yes she played a big part in our relationship…..the nights you should have been with me you were with her" Sue Ellen said "That started right from when we came back off honeymoon"

JR looked at her "Before that darlin'" he said

"What do you mean?" Sue Ellen asked

JR squeezed her hand tightly "You wanted the truth didn't you" he said

"Yes" she said

"And you promise me that whatever I say will not change anything between us" JR said

"I promise" she said

"Okay…….I knew Julie long before I met you, we had been together for about five years before I met you" he said "We were still together when I met you"

"You mean you were still seeing her and me?" Sue Ellen said

JR looked into her eyes "Yes….right up to the time we were married in fact when you couldn't come into town at the weekend I would spend time with her" he said

"Why didn't you marry her?" Sue Ellen said "Why did you marry me?"

JR thought for a moment "You my darlin' was Miss Texas…simply the best the number one woman in the whole of the state….a winner and that what I needed as a wife. Not Julie, she was just a secretary with no social class" he said

"So you didn't love me when we first got married" Sue Ellen asked

JR moved closer to her holding her tightly. "Sweetheart the man you're looking at now is not the man I was back then. Back then love wasn't important hell I didn't even know what love was, all I cared about was being the best and having the best and you were the best" JR said

"I thought you loved me" Sue Ellen said feeling a little bit hurt

"Hey come on I do love you…you know that" JR said "If this is going to be too painful for you I'm stopping it now"

"No…carry on" Sue Ellen said

"I remembered thinking that when we got married I would stop seeing Julie, then the first time we made love I don't know what it was but I kept wishing it was Julie there with me" He said

"I wasn't good enough for you" Sue Ellen said

"You just didn't do what Julie did to me" JR said "And for some reason I couldn't teach you…I thought it would degrade you"

"I think I accepted things for a while after we were married, but then Bobby and Pam got married…they were forever kissing, holding hands and it just made me feel jealous. We hardly ever made love…I wanted what Bobby and Pam had" Sue Ellen said

"I remember the day you brought home the negligee…I thought you had lost your senses…that was not what I expected from you" JR said

"I begged you to make love to me but you wouldn't" Sue Ellen said

"I'm sorry" JR said

"You went straight to her didn't you?" Sue Ellen said

"Yes….I needed some release and she provided it" JR replied

"What was she like" Sue Ellen asked

JR saw the tears in her eyes beginning to stream down her face, gently he wiped them away. This was painful and he really hoped this didn't affect what they had between them now.

"She wasn't you….she was streetwise; not afraid to do anything I asked and she was my confidante. She knew my secrets" JR said

"How did you feel when she died?" Sue Ellen asked

"Devastated like I had lost part of me" JR replied

Sue Ellen pulled away from him; she knew this was going to be a painful conversation but she hadn't realized how painful. JR reached out to her trying to pull her back to him but she stood up.

"Sue Ellen please….don't do this" JR said "This is all in the past"

"I always thought that even though you slept with other women that you didn't really love them but that wasn't true you did love them possibly more than me" she said quietly.

"Darlin' I have never loved anyone the way I love you….I told you back then I didn't know what love was but I do now and it isn't what I felt for Julie" JR said

"What is it then?" Sue Ellen asked

"What I feel at this moment is powerful…it's like you consume my thoughts every day. Each moment I'm away from you, I want to be back by your side. I love lying awake at night watching you sleep feeling the warmth of your body next to mine. I finally understand what love is and I can honestly say I never felt this way about Julie" he said

Sue Ellen turned and faced him "How did you feel when you nearly lost me after John Ross' birth" she said "Did you feel devastated then?"

"Yes….I sat by your bed for three nights while you were in a coma…pleading with you to wake up, promising things would be different. I remember each day after visiting hours were over pleading with the nurses to just let me sit with you for a while longer. For three days I didn't do anything but wait for you to wake up" he said

"You mean you felt guilty" Sue Ellen said

"No, I mean for the first time in my life I felt afraid" JR said "Afraid that I was going to lose someone special"

"If I was that special how come you needed the other women" Sue Ellen said

"I don't know…I was foolish, stupid….thought that I had the power to have it all and I did. I could have any woman I wanted and I loved that feeling" JR said

"What about Kristin?" Sue Ellen said

"God do we have to bring her into this" JR said

"She was my sister…how could you" Sue Ellen replied "And not only that you really believed that the child she was carrying was yours, I mean let's face it she was sleeping around. And yet you couldn't bring yourself to believe that John Ross was yours without proof. How do you think I felt?"

"Sue Ellen, Kristin threw herself at me. From the moment she arrived back in Dallas she had one aim and that was to get her sister's husband for herself" JR said

"She hated me that much" Sue Ellen said

"I don't know….she told me she always felt second best and I knew how that felt. I guess I felt a connection to her. She told me how you would always get the new clothes and she would get the second hand clothes." JR said

"That wasn't my fault….do you think I really wanted to do the pageants, parading myself in front of judges like a piece of meat" Sue Ellen said

JR was silent, something about her demeanor was now scaring him. She had turned hostile; something had changed he felt he was losing her. Suddenly he stood up.

"I can't do this" He said as he walked into their bedroom and shut the door. Sue Ellen stood alone in the living room staring at the space that JR had just vacated. She walked over to where John Ross and Christopher were sleeping and peered into their room. She looked at their innocent faces and gently stroked her son's face. Her precious darling son who looked more and more like his father each day, she loved him so much. Her gaze went to Christopher; Kristin's son….a victim of Kristin's games…her obsession with being rich, thinking about how she tried to blackmail money out of several men who she claimed was his father Sue Ellen felt anger towards her sister. How could she do that to her own child…even worse how could Christopher's father carry on the deceit after her death. What sort of parents did her nephew have? She was so glad that she had allowed Bobby and Pam to adopt him. Hopefully he would never know the truth about his real parents. After sitting, watching the boys she went back into the living room, JR was still not there so she went into the bedroom. His back was turned away from her. This wasn't his fault she had wanted to bring up the past and find out what the women in his life meant to him. Slowly she crept up on the bed behind him wrapping her arms around his neck, kissing his cheek.

"I'm sorry" she said

JR looked at her and she saw the tears in his eyes "I don't want to lose what we've got now by bringing up the past and I'm afraid that's what will happen" he said

"It won't!" Sue Ellen said "Please let's talk this through"

"When you came out of the hospital all I wanted was to make things up to you and accept the baby as mine, be a real family but you were so cold and constantly pushed me away. I just got so frustrated with you attitude, then Kristin came along showing me the affection you denied me and I was flattered by her and that's how things started. I think she already had the idea in her head that she was going to be the next Mrs JR Ewing and with her mother's approval" JR said

"What!" Sue Ellen said

"Darlin' I once asked her didn't she have any misgivings about sleeping with her sister's husband and she told me that even her mother had told her that if you didn't want me then it was okay for Kristin to make a move on me" JR said

"Are you serious?" Sue Ellen asked

"'fraid so" JR said "Apparently your mother thought it would be a shame to lose me as a son-in-law so she told Kristin that if you weren't interested in me then it was okay for her to make a play for me"

Sue Ellen shook her head "God, the only thing my mother cared about what making sure her daughters married rich men….no wonder why we turned out the way we did" she said "I remember during the paternity suite I came into your office to sign some papers and she pretended she was being nice but she was secretly hoping that Cliff was telling the truth and that you would throw me off Southfork and move her in"

"Kristin and I were two of a kind….we were both ambitious and we didn't care what we did to get what we wanted or who we hurt in the process" JR said

"I remember after the morning after you were shot….I woke up at the airport…god knows why, I drove back to Southfork and she was there. She told me what had happened very conveniently reminding me that I had gone to her apartment the night before with a gun. She set me up to take the blame for shooting you. How could she do that?" Sue Ellen said

"She didn't care about you all she was interested in was getting away with shooting me" JR said "I think the best thing that came out of that was it brought you back to me if only for a while"

"I felt guilty but I also saw how vulnerable you were and something inside me snap….I just wanted to love you and look after you" Sue Ellen said

"Something inside me told me that you hadn't done it" JR said "I guess I wanted to believe you didn't hate me that much"

"I don't think I've ever truly hated you, there were times when I really disliked you" Sue Ellen said

"We had some great times while I was recovering" JR said "Didn't we?"

Sue Ellen smiled "Yes" she said "But part of me feels guilty. I remember how happy I was when you set Bobby up, how I turned against him when in fact he was the one true friend I had within the Ewing family. I remember during the time of the paternity suite, he told me that even if the test came back with Cliff as John Ross' father he would stand by me and after the shooting and things were great between you and me I treated him like dirt. JR I love you brother so much and I really wish he was here so I could tell him that"

"I love him too Sue Ellen and I miss him" JR said

"Whenever we were back together I turned my back on the people who were there when I needed them, Miss Ellie, Bobby, Pam….I don't like the person I was back then" Sue Ellen said "Even Clayton…I've sided with you at times against him and that wasn't fair"

"Sue Ellen you've changed so much...we both have and I'm determined to create a happy future for us" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled and kissed him "Okay..so where were we" she said "Oh yes the period after you got shot…..so many happy memories JR. Do you remember the afternoons we would spend in bed, loving each other while John Ross took a nap and then when he wake up I used to get up and bring him into bed with us and we snuggle up in our own safe cocoon. The horse rides along the ranch, swimming in the lake, playing in the pool with our son. We couldn't get enough of each other"

"I remember" JR said

"Then you ruined it by sleeping with Afton in our bed on the day of your niece's wedding, how could you?" Sue Ellen said

"Because she made it so easy" JR said "She offered me sex without any commitment and I took it"

"But we weren't exactly celibate" Sue Ellen said "We made love every single day why did you need her?"

"I was bored…I wanted some excitement." JR said

"So I wasn't enough for you or I didn't do what you needed me to do to you, was that it?" Sue Ellen said

JR remained silent. He didn't know what to say to her. She had been everything to him but they were getting to close. At the time he found their new relationship suffocating. He needed something different. Sue Ellen looked at him and climbed off the bed.

"I'm going to make a coffee" she said avoiding eye contact with him.

JR waited for five minutes before following her outside. He found her on the sofa curled up with a mug of coffee in her hands, he noticed that she had made him a mug too. Picking the mug up he went and sat next to her. Why was she making him do this to her? He knew she was hurting and he wanted it to stop.

"JR….after the divorce you made me fall in love with you again, then we got remarried and within six months you were sleeping with Holly Harwood" she said

"She set me up…she set us up she wanted you to find us like that" JR said "She knew it would destroy you"

"But you could have turned away…rejected her the way you rejected me so many times in the early part of our marriage but you didn't, you slept with her" Sue Ellen said

"Yes and don't you think I regretted that" JR said "The night of the fire at Southfork, I remember seeing the flames rush up the staircase and my one thought was getting to you and John Ross before it was too late. I loved you"

"I remember the time after Bobby got shot…you were feeling alone, I was in the gym and you came in…telling me how alone you felt…how all you had was John Ross and me.. I try to fight my feelings but we ended up making love on the floor of the gym" Sue Ellen said "JR there have been so many women in your life…why did you need them when you had a wife who loved you"

"I don't know…..it was never about love….it was about the chase and power, then giving them up and going back to you." JR said "I would never have left you for any of them"

"What about Mandy?" Sue Ellen said

"Darlin' let's not bring her into this….she isn't worth it" JR said "At the end of the day it was her I let go not you and like I told you for a long time during my relationship with Mandy it was you I wanted in my arms. Sue Ellen when I was growing up there was noone there to tell me about love even show me love….affection and those sort of emotions were alien to me, it's only now since I've been able to give myself completely to you that I know what love is"

Sue Ellen looked at him; she was so in love with this man, she just wanted to take him in her arms and love him, she knew how badly his childhood had affected him.

"JR…do you still have the need for other women. Has there ever been a time in the last six months that you've seen a woman and wanted her" Sue Ellen asked

"No" JR said "You're enough for me."

"What about when the triplets come and I'm too tired for sex. What then?" Sue Ellen said

"Darlin' we will both be tired looking after the three of them. Beside there are other ways I can relieve myself" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "Let's not go there please. But can you promise me that there will never be anyone else but me" she said

"I can guarantee it" JR said "Look I've told you before, I have what I always wanted…you…I was just too stupid to realize that but something inside me has changed I think I've finally realize what love is. I look at you and my heart jumps. I imagine what's its going to be like in a couple of months time when I can see you getting bigger with our children, holding you in my arms, feeling them move and knowing that nothing can take this from me. You belong to me and I belong to you and that is how I want it to stay"

"We've come so far JR" she said as she placed her mug on the table. JR placed his mug beside it and opened his arms to her.

"Come here" he said

Sue Ellen slid up beside him and he pulled her into his lap, holding her tightly and gently kissing her. "I love you and only you" he said

"I love you too" she said

"When we go home, I'm planning on talking to Clayton and seeing if I can persuade him to help me out with Ewing Oil. I don't want it to take me away from my family anymore. I'm also going to open up Ewing23, which is the field I shut down some years ago after I learnt that Cliff, as an heir of Digger had a share in it. When the babies come I'm also going to try and figure out a way that I can work from home so that I can help you with them. This time I don't want a nurse looking after them I want us to do it. And as well as looking after you and the triplets I'm planning on making sure that John Ross knows just how much I love him" JR said

"Cliff will wonder what you're up to" Sue Ellen laughed "Are we going to stay at Southfork?"

"I don't know….in theory it would be best because we'd have momma and Clayton on hand to help out however I'm not sure I can live there with momma anymore. I just feel that she doesn't love me and everytime she looks at me she's reminded of the son she's lost" JR said

"I think she's ready to talk to you…well Pam gave me that impression. So let's see what she has to say" Sue Ellen said

"I want to know the truth about Digger…..daddy always told me he was a drunk and a loser who couldn't handle being beaten" JR said

"It must have been hard having Jock take away both his girl and Ewing Oil" Sue Ellen said

"I guess so" JR said "All these years spent hating the man and trying to do anything to destroy his family and now I find out he's my father. I really don't know what to feel"

"I think it's best to take one step at a time…see what happens when we get back to Dallas" Sue Ellen said

"What about us?" JR asked "For a minute I thought I had lost you…you turned cold on me"

"JR…I was just upset to hear you admit that you loved Julie" Sue Ellen said

"Sweetheart I thought that I loved Julie….but in reality I don't think I did, with my hand on my heart I can honestly say that I've never felt about anyone the way I feel about you, I am so proud of you and our son….I promise you from now on the only woman I want or need is you!" he said

Sue Ellen smiled "I hope you mean that….these past few months have been so good I couldn't stand the thought of having you go back to your old ways" she said

"It's not going to happen" JR said "I love you and I promise that I'm going to take care of you…the same way you've looked out for me these past few weeks. You have been my life saver these last few weeks without you I don't know what I would have done. I remember after momma told me about Digger I felt so alone and desperate and then when I asked her the following morning about him she just brushed me off as though my feelings didn't matter but you held me in your arms, told me everything would be okay and listened to me…the one thing I could never afford to lose in this world is you…my family means everything to me"

"It's taken you a long time to realize that!" Sue Ellen said

"I know" JR said as he looked at his watch, it was getting late and he knew the two monsters asleep in the next room would be up early tomorrow. "Hey it's time for bed"

Sue Ellen looked at him "It's time to put the past behind us….it's over, it can't hurt us anymore…what's important is the future and if this holiday is anything to go by it looks perfect" she said

"Can you forgive me for all the times I cheated on you….made you feel worthless?" JR asked

"I forgave you a long time ago….neither of us were perfect what matters is that we've realized our mistakes and are moving forward together as friends, lovers and soulmates." Sue Ellen replied

"Soulmates….do you really believe in that rubbish?" JR asked

Sue Ellen laughed "Typical male….yes I believe there is someone for everyone and you just happened to be my someone" she said

"What did you think when you heard that I wasn't Jock's son but Digger's" JR said

She gently stroked his face "I didn't think anything I was more worried about what the news would do to you. I knew how badly this would affect you and I wanted to be there for you" she said "Now are you coming to bed or not!"

Three days later it was the family's final day in Florida. Having done the attractions at Epcot JR and Sue Ellen decided to let the boys decide how they wanted to spend their last day. JR knew exactly what was in store for him. After doing the 'Big Thunder Mountain Railroad' they moved on to the 'Haunted Mansion' followed by 'Pirates of the Carribean' and 'Space Mountain'. Having spent the morning queuing for the rides JR felt tired so persuaded the boys to take a break. As they sat eating their lunch the boys chatted away about their holiday.

"So what did you two like the best?" JR asked

"Splash Mountain" they laughed "Seeing you get wet and not being able to go home and change"

Sue Ellen laughed too "And just think I've got all the photos to take home and show everyone" she said

"Can we go on there this afternoon…please daddy" John Ross said

"Well I don't know…we'll have to see" JR said

"Pleeeeeeeeeeease" the boys said

"Hey you two if you don't eat your lunch you wont be going anywhere" Sue Ellen said

The boys continued eating there lunch. Sue Ellen knew full well that JR was not going to disappoint his son. After paying the bill the family went back outside.

"So daddy" John Ross said "Can we go and queue for Splash Mountian"

"How about we go to 'Tom Sawyer's Island first as I need to have a rest from lunch before I go on that thing again" JR replied

Sue Ellen and JR rested while the boys once again explored the island.

"They never get tired of doing the same old things do they" JR said

"No…..they play make believe….exploring for treasure, pretending there's pirates on the island, things like that" Sue Ellen said

"I've never played like that. I guess I've got no imagination" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "We've all got imagination, it just some of us don't use it." She said "At their age they're using it all the time"

"Christopher seems to be having fun….maybe I should take him camping with John Ross when we get back home" JR said

"That would be a good idea…Pam was telling me on the phone that Mark wants to adopt him" Sue Ellen said

"Can he do that?" JR asked "Even with Pam not being his natural mother"

"I don't see that there would be any problem. Pam's worried that he'll forget Bobby but I don't think he will" Sue Ellen said "In fact he was talking about him the other day"

"Will Pam ever tell him the truth?" JR asked "About him being adopted"

"I hope not….it may sound horrible but I don't want momma finding out about him; I'm not sure she wouldn't try and take him off Pam" Sue Ellen said "I just want him to have a normal happy childhood just like our children"

"Well he doesn't seem to be having too bad a one so far" JR said

"Neither is John Ross" Sue Ellen laughed "You know I could stay here forever, forget the rest of the world just concentrate on us" she said

They were interrupted by John Ross and Christopher "Daddy it's time to go to Splash Mountain" John Ross said

JR groaned knowing that he couldn't put it off any longer. Looking at his son he saw how happy the boy was. "Okay" he said "Let's go"

JR and the boys had four rides before JR decided it was time to go home. Sue Ellen had been on her feet all day long and she looked tired. Before going home they watched the end of day fireworks from the castle. Then when it was finished they went back to the hotel leaving the dreams and magic of Disney behind them although JR was determined that one day they'd be back. After reading the children a bedtime story JR and Sue Ellen went and sat down in the living room both exhausted but happy.

"We're going to have to come back here one day" JR said

"Of course" Sue Ellen said

"I think one of the best things I liked though was curling up on our bed with the boys and reading them stories, night after night. Some of those stories I've never heard" JR said

"Sometimes after a busy day the best thing in the world to do is curl up with a book" Sue Ellen said "I used to read all the time when I was younger….I even used to read Kristin stories when she was little"

"There was a big age gap between you two" JR said

"About the same as between you and Bobby" Sue Ellen replied "I remember her being five years old and reading her Pinnochio. Anyway a few days later she broke something in the house I can't remember what but she denied doing it and blamed me. I told her that if she told lies her nose would grow bigger like Pinnochio…next thing I know is she's at the mirror measuring her nose to see if it's got any bigger"

JR laughed "She was a little troublemaker back then" he said

"Oh yes and she could get away with anything being the youngest." Sue Ellen said

JR moved closer to her and took her in his arms. "I know which sister I prefer" he said

Sue Ellen kissed him "Hmmm" she said "She always wanted what I had"

"Let's not talk about her…I think it's time for bed as we've got a busy day tomorrow packing for our next holiday" JR said

"I'm not tired" Sue Ellen said

"Who said anything about sleep?" JR asked

"Are you trying to seduce me" Sue Ellen said

JR kissed her passionately "What do you think" he said "I want you….I want to show you what you mean to me"

Sue Ellen stood up from the sofa and reached out her hand for JR. JR took them and kissed them standing up he put his arm around his wife and together they walked to the bedroom. JR realized how talking through the past had helped them as in these past few days they were closer than ever and that is how he wanted it to stay. The past two weeks had showed him what he had been missing all these years and he couldn't wait to start the next part of their holiday.

They arrived on their own private island in the Seychelles after spending a few hours on the main island.

"This is perfect" Sue Ellen said as she looked around the beach house "I can't believe we've got the whole place to ourselves"

"Yeah noone can disturb us….we have a whole beach to play on" JR said

"Can we go down to the beach?" John Ross asked

"Sure" Sue Ellen said "Be careful"

JR and Sue Ellen watched the two boys race down to the beach, buckets and spades which they had just brought from the main island in their hands.

"Wonder what trouble those two are going to cook up" JR said "At least this time I know I wont get wet"

"Don't be too sure about that" Sue Ellen laughed

"Are you okay?" JR asked

Sue Ellen looked at him "Of course I am why do you ask"

"Guess I'm just worried about the conversation we had the other night" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at him and smiled "I told you…it's over….I think talking about those things helped clear the air" she said

"I'm not proud of what happened in the past" JR said "In fact I have so many regrets"

"Neither of us were perfect JR but I think this past year…..I don't know we both seemed to have changed. Maybe we've finally grown up"

"I'm not looking forward to going back to Dallas next week. I know momma's going to be upset because Gary didn't turn up then she's going to be annoyed because we didn't tell her about the triplets" JR said

Sue Ellen turned and looked at him "We can't stay here forever beside I've got a pre-natal appointment in ten days time" she said "Don't worry about Miss Ellie…I'm sure things will be okay"

JR looked towards the two boys paddling their feet in the water, laughing he said "Oh to be that age again and have nothing to be worried about"

"Mmm, I don't know…they've got a lot to learn" Sue Ellen said "It would be nice to be that age and know what we know now"

JR sat down in the sand and took his shoes off "I remember being John Ross' age. Everything revolved around Ewing Oil and daddy teaching me the business" he said "By the age of sixteen I was practically running the place"

"Tell me some more about your grandfather" Sue Ellen said

JR laughed "Don't you ever get tired of me talking about the past" he asked

Sue Ellen shook her head "No, it's my lifelong project to find out what makes JR Ewing tick" she said

"Its funny but I can remember a lot about him…even though he died when I was quite young" JR said "In fact Clayton reminds me of him. He was strong, yet gentle but he wouldn't take any nonsense from anyone but above all he was never threatening…I was never scared of him"

"It must be a generation thing….grandparents are usually easier to deal with than parents" Sue Ellen said

"Mine was" JR said "I remember our fishing trips, I was only about four or five but they're still crystal clear. Once grandpa had some worms which he was using for bait and I remember wondering what the fish would taste when they bit on the worm, so when he wasn't looking I tried to eat one"

"That's disgusting" Sue Ellen laughed

"No more disgusting than eating cake mix" JR replied "Anyway I remember not liking the taste, so I spat it out and took a drink from Grandpa's flask. That made me sick as well"

"What was in the flask" Sue Ellen asked

"Well there were two flasks one with orange juice in and the other with bourbon, unfortunately I took the wrong flask. It brought on a coughing fit; I mean I thought my throat was on fire, grandpa laughed when he realized what I done. The best part of fishing though was the cooking it on the camp stove then eating it. I used to watch grandpa while he filleted the fish and then we used to cook it. While it was cooking he taught me camp fire songs and tell me stories of how he built up Southfork, guess it was the happiest times of my childhood…some of my best memories of that time were when he was alive. I didn't have to compete with anyone for his attention" JR said "When he died I felt so alone"

Sue Ellen rested her head again his shoulder

"He would have hated what I turned into though" JR said "I mean I almost lost Southfork, For a moment I forgot about him and how much he loved the place; all I cared about was Ewing Oil and being the best"

"You took a gamble and it paid off" Sue Ellen said

"Yeah but we could have lost everything" JR said "I cringe when I think of the things I've done"

"Does the old JR still exist?" Sue Ellen asked

JR sighed "I don't know…I'm trying to put him in the past. I want to be a good husband and father but there are times when I'm scared of failing of going back to my old ways" he said "Having said that….these past few weeks…being with you and John Ross have been great…I feel as though I'm part of something and not standing on my own having to fight to be noticed….I can truthfully say I haven't got the drive for Ewing Oil that I once had. What I want now is to spend time with you and our children…be a family. You know that was Bobby's last words 'Be a family' and I now know what he meant"

"Sweetheart…there were some good things about the old JR…after all I married him twice. Sue Ellen said

"Yeah you did didn't you" JR laughed "Thinking about it now I regret mortgaging Southfork…my grandfather showed me nothing but love and I should of respected his memory. Another thing I remember about grandpa is how he used to like to decorate Southfork at Christmas. He used to decorate inside and outside….there would be lights all over the place. One Christmas…I must have been about four…we were out in the field with the cattle and I asked him if we could decorate the cattle too and we did. He spent the whole afternoon with me making paper chains which we put around their necks and then he put bells on every single one of them"

"I bet the paper chains didn't last long" Sue Ellen laughed

"I think they lasted about a day" JR replied "He also used to tell me stories connected with Christmas…one story he told me claimed that at Midnight on Christmas Eve all the animals all over the world would fall on their knees in prayer. Never did find out if that was true"

"I've heard that story too….maybe we should camp out in the barn next Christmas Eve" she laughed "I used to love going to the midnight service with momma and daddy, haven't done that in a long time"

"Maybe we should go this year" JR said

"Mmm, I think the church may just fall down if you walk in" Sue Ellen said "Beside we're going to be a little busy this year"

"So you think that the babies will be born before Christmas?" JR asked

"Well sometime between November and December" Sue Ellen said "It depends on what my health is like….it's likely that if either my health or that of the babies is compromised then they'll perform a C-section. Mind you the longer they leave it the better chance we have of the three babies surviving"

"I want to be there with you this time" JR said

"That shouldn't be a problem" Sue Ellen replied

Their conversation was interrupted by the sound of laughter coming from further down the beach.

"They seem to be having fun" JR said "John Ross has a lot of you in him"

"What makes you say that?" Sue Ellen asked

"The way he is with Christopher……he behaves like a big brother making sure that Christopher is okay and doesn't feel left out. At no point has he shown any jealousy when we've shown Christopher attention" JR replied

"I think he knows that Christopher misses Bobby and he's also secure in the fact that we love him and knows that he has nothing to be jealous of. Whatever our differences have been in the past the one thing we've always been united on is our love for our son." Sue Ellen said

"Yeah but he has your compassionate side….the side of you that I used and abused so many times. I knew when things were bad that somehow I could get to you and entice you back to me…I knew that when the world hated me that you would be the one person that I could rely on to be on my side" JR said "That's what I love about you…your power to forgive anything…no matter how badly I treated you"

Sue Ellen kissed him "I guess you're worth it" she said "Everytime I see pain in your eyes I melt. That's what I found so hard after Bobby died. I knew how much you loved him and I wanted to comfort you….take you in my arms and love all the pain away but you wouldn't let me. That's why I needed to be there for you when you found out about Digger. JR I need you to understand how much I love you….not because you're JR Ewing but because you're the man I fell in love with all those years ago on the night of the Miss Texas Paegent. Something in me clicked that night when I looked into your eyes and it's still there. JR do you realize that your wife is hopelessly in love with you"

JR smiled and kissed her "I think so" he said

Gently she hit him, shaking her head she laughed "You think so!" she said "Do you know that if you wanted to walk away from Ewing Oil, Southfork and all the Ewing money then I'd follow you. As long as I have you and our children then nothing else matters"

JR smiled "I feel the same….all my life I've blocked out all forms of emotions, I've never really been able to make a connection with anyone…I didn't know how to but with you and John Ross things are different. What I've found is unconditional love….that you love me in spite of everything…when I'm in your arms I don't have to pretend to be the best oilman in the world I can open up and be myself"

"We're going to give our children everything that we missed out on. John Ross is never going to feel second best…we waited so long for him and we're going to teach them what's important and it's not money or business deals it's being a family and supporting each other through whatever life throws at us" Sue Ellen said

JR looked at the two children playing in the sand, building sand castles, then they ran to the shoreline as the tide came in, John Ross taking Christopher's hand as he encouraged his cousin to try and jump the tiny waves. He knew his son would make the perfect big brother.

"Hey come on…let's go down to the water" JR said "It's time to get those two monsters"

Later that evening JR sat in the rocking chair on the veranda. These past two weeks had revitalized him but in a way he was also felt tired. Sue Ellen crept up behind him and put her arms around his neck.

"Those two monsters have tired you out" she laughed

JR yawned "Guess I'm getting old" he replied "I can't believe how much energy those two have….they've been running around on the beach all afternoon and still wanted to play ball on the beach before going to bed"

"I was watching you playing with them….you're something else you know that. To most people you're a ruthless business man who will stop at nothing to get what you want….and yet with John Ross you totally change, it's as though you're another person" she said "You're patient, gentle and loving…..straits which other people have never seen"

JR laughed "Hey I've got to keep up my image darlin'. Can't have people thinking that ole JR's no longer the hard man" he said

Sue Ellen went and sat on JR's lap and he put his arms around her, resting his hand on her stomach "What's going on in there" he said

Sue Ellen kissed him "Oh they're fine" she said "In another month or so you'll be able to feel them moving yourself, and in four or five month's time they'll be here with us, then we'll have the sleepless nights"

"God…if they're anything like John Ross we're going to have our hands full. I mean he sure had a set of lungs on him" JR said "When he cried noone slept"

Sue Ellen laughed "Funnily enough your mother once told me the same thing about you" she said "John Ross wasn't that bad…as I recall he slept through the night from the age of six months"

"I remember once or twice, waking up in the middle of the night and checking the clock and realizing that he should be awake. I'd slip out of bed and creep into the nursery just to check that he was still breathing" JR said "And then when I found out he was mine, there were times when I used to pick him up from the crib and cuddle him close to me."

"I know there were a few times when I'd wake up to find you not there then wander into the nursery to find you two snuggled up together" Sue Ellen said "The one thing I never doubted was your ability as a father….I knew John Ross had the best"

"Hey do you fancy a walk down by the beach" JR said

"What about the children" Sue Ellen said "We can't leave them"

"Let's just go and check on them but I bet they're fast asleep…beside we wont be that long" he replied

JR and Sue Ellen walked into the house and checked that the boys were sleeping. Sue Ellen picked up a blanket and they walked hand in hand down to the beach. JR placed the blanket on the ground and both of them sat down.

"It really is beautiful out here" Sue Ellen said "There are so many stars in the sky"

"Yeah…do you remember how we used to go for a walk at night around the lake at Southfork and put a blanket on the ground; gaze up at the stars above and count them" JR asked

"You knew the names of all the constellations" Sue Ellen said "I used to sit memorized by you, as you told me the names of them"

JR stood up and reached for her hand "Come on let's go down to the sea" he said

"Before we do that…you need to take off your shoes" she laughed

JR did as he was told and the couple ran down to the shoreline. The water was cool as it washed against their feet.

"Damn this water isn't as warm as the Southfork pool" JR said

"Have you ever swum in the ocean JR?" Sue Ellen asked

"No…I never had beach holiday and if it's as cold as this in there then I wont be going in this time either" JR said

"Spoilsport" Sue Ellen said "And I wouldn't be so sure about not swimming in here…we both know that if your son wants you to join him you'll do it"

"But it's cold" JR said

"No it's not…true it's not heated like the pool but it's still refreshing" Sue Ellen said "I used to love swimming in the ocean when I was little….in fact my daddy and I used to spend most of our time swimming"

They spent a couple of minutes splashing around then JR walked Sue Ellen back up the beach. They sat back down on the blanket both commenting how warm it still was outside. JR lay down and sighed, Sue Ellen snuggled closer to him.

"We should get back" she whispered

"No..the boys are fine and beside I want to make love to you on this beach" JR smiled

Sue Ellen stood up "Sorry JR…not tonight" she said trying to sound convincing

JR took her hand and pulled her back down onto the blanket "Playing hard to get" he laughed

Sue Ellen gently stroked his face "As much as I love you I can't let you get your own way all the time" she said "Beside what if one of the boys wake up and come down here, how you going to explain what we're doing"

"Oh I can be very discreet…beside we've tired them out" JR said

"I thought you said you were tired" she laughed

"Not for you I'm not…now be quiet" JR said

JR gently pulled her closer to him and kissed her passionately. He then reached under her skirt and placed his hand into her panties. Sue Ellen laughed.

"JR!" she said as she kissed him JR rolled her onto her back then skillfully removed her panties, suddenly he stopped and looked at her.

"What's wrong" she asked

"Just thinking….I don't want to hurt you or the babies" he said "Is this okay?"

Sue Ellen smiled "No you wont hurt us" she said "However maybe I should take control" she said as she rolled him on his back. Her hand went to his crotch and finding his zip she released him. JR kissed her

"I love you" he said

Gently she stroked him then guided him inside of her, together they moved as one finding their rhythm…kissing each other tenderly as they went towards the height of their passion, finally they began to relax holding each other in a tight embrace.

"You do realize I plan on doing this every night" JR said

"Fine by me" Sue Ellen said

"I am so proud of you" JR said as he lovingly stroked her face. "You've come so far….you're so much stronger than I ever thought you could be and I'm truly happy that you are my wife and the mother of my children"

Sue Ellen kissed him "I'm proud of you too…..I'm proud of the way that you've coped with knowing that Jock wasn't your father….also how you've put John Ross and me first and haven't thought of Ewing Oil once during this holiday and how you've looked after both John Ross and Christopher on the rides at Disneyworld and never complained at having to go on the same ride 30 times" she said

"That was tough but I'm going to enjoy seeing you do that next time" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "I'm scared of heights so you're never getting me on those rides" she said "You'd have to tie me to one of them"

"Hmm tying you up..sounds interesting" JR said

"You're terrible" She replied

JR pulled her into a kiss "I know…which is why you love me"

Once again they began to make love knowing that each time made a stronger connection between them. JR realized that there was a bond between them that was stronger than anything he had ever experienced.

The following day the family went down to the beach for a picnic. Sue Ellen lay in the shade as the sun was hot while JR watched the boys digging a hole.

"What are you guys digging for" JR asked "Buried treasure"

"Could be" Christopher said

"Or if we're lucky we could strike oil" John Ross laughed

JR laughed and looked over at Sue Ellen "Are you okay?" he asked

"Fine" she smiled

Half an hour later the two boys finished digging and sat down beside JR.

"Daddy" John Ross said

"Yeah" JR replied

"Will you get in our hole please" John Ross said

JR looked at the hole "Hmm now why would I want to do that?" he asked

"Because we want to bury you" Christopher laughed

Sue Ellen laughed on hearing Christopher's reply. Remembering how she and her father had once persuaded her mother to let them bury her.

"Please" John Ross said

"You won't get any peace until you do" Sue Ellen said

JR reluctantly got up and walked towards the hole "You sure you wouldn't rather bury your mother" JR said

"Nope" John Ross said "We want to bury you"

"Okay….you two I'll help" Sue Ellen said as she got up "How about you do the burying John Ross while Christopher and I head down the beach and find some shells and seaweed for decoration"

"Yes" the two boys said

"And when we finish I'll take a picture of you" Sue Ellen said

"I'll get you back for this" JR called after his wife as she picked up a bucket and headed down the beach. Suddenly she turned around and called up to John Ross.

"John Ross be careful of your father's face….I don't think he'd appreciate sand in his eyes or mouth"

"Okay" John Ross replied

JR watched as Sue Ellen and Christopher raced off down the beach; he'd get his revenge on her later, he thought.

"Daddy don't move" John Ross said

Feeling defeated JR lay back and closed his eyes. John Ross began his task of covering his father with sand. Sue Ellen and Christopher went near the shoreline collecting shells.

"Okay Christopher..we'll get the shells in your bucket and the seaweed in mine" she said

"Look…there's some real pretty shells here" Christopher said

"hmmm, we need some big ones and some little ones…okay…you collect those and I'm going to find some seaweed" she said

Sue Ellen walked further along the shoreline trying to find seaweed. She hated the stuff, remembering how when she was little she used to hate going in the water where there was any seaweed and how her father would remove it for her. She looked back at Christopher, he seemed happy although she knew he missed Bobby. Ten minutes later they went back up the beach with their buckets.

"Right, how are you doing" she asked her son

"Okay" John Ross said "Daddy can you move?"

"Ah, I don't think so" JR replied

"Good, that's what we want to hear" Sue Ellen said smiling at JR.

Sue Ellen got hold of a spare spade and patted down the sand that John Ross was continuing to throw over his father's body. When they had finished Christopher picked up the bucket of shells and they began to decorate. Finally they took a step back to admire their work.

"Time for a picture" Sue Ellen said "You two go and kneel by daddy"

The two boys did as they were told and Sue Ellen took some photographs of their work.

"How long do I have to stay here" JR asked

"Daddy we're going to explore the beach…we'll see you in a while" John Ross said "We'll let you out at lunchtime"

"That's ages away" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed and sat down beside him. "JR you're lucky they're going to let you out at lunchtime" she said "I remember being seven years old and digging a hole with my daddy, then we asked momma to get in it….which is why I knew what those two were planning when they started digging…I just didn't know who would have the pleasure of being buried. Anyway momma complained that she didn't want sand over her but daddy told her not to be so miserable so in the end she gave up and did what we wanted. Just as those two did we decorated with shells and then finally sat back and admired our work. Mamma started complaining that she wanted to get out so daddy stood up and took my hand. We then started walking away from the beach and momma shouted out asking us where we were going. Daddy told her he was going to buy me an ice cream…anyhow when we got back we sat there eating ice cream in front of her"

"You mean your father didn't' get your momma one?" JR asked

"No, he said she had been about us having fun so she didn't deserve one. I remember him just sitting there enjoying every single part of that ice cream knowing that she was getting more and more annoyed" Sue Ellen said

"You're father sounds like a fun guy" JR said

"He was….I wish he was still here so that he could enjoy his grandchildren" Sue Ellen said "I was thinking while we were down on the shore how I used to hate seaweed and he'd always remove the seaweed so that I could go swimming!"

JR looked at her and saw a hint of sadness in her eyes. He looked down the beach and saw the two boys exploring the rocks.

"Hey help me out of here" he said

"I can't sorry" Sue Ellen replied

"Please….I just want to hold you in my arms" he said

"Wait" Sue Ellen said and stood up, walking down the beach towards the two children. A couple of minutes later she walked back up after speaking to her son.

"John Ross said you can get out" she laughed

Sue Ellen removed the sand from JR and once he was free, he stood up and shook himself clean. "God…I've got sand where I didn't think it was possible to get sand" he said

They went and sat back down on the blanket, JR wrapped his arms around Sue Ellen.

"Are you okay….I was just looking at you earlier and you seemed a little sad" JR said

"I'm fine….just thinking about daddy makes me sad at times" she replied "I always used to think that he would come back one day and take me away to live with him"

"Were things that bad at home without him" JR asked

"No…it wasn't that. There was just no more laughter….no silly games everything changed. And there was momma's obsession to create perfect ladies who would marry millionaires. Every boyfriend you had was checked out to see how much money was in his father's bank account. Got a bit tiring after a while" she said

"We've both got bad childhood memories" JR said

"Yeah but we've got some good ones too…..but I'm determined that our children are only going to have happy ones" Sue Ellen said

JR pulled her into a kiss "Hey I need to go in the water and get this sand cleaned off" he said "You going to join me"

"I thought you said it was too cold for you" she laughed

"You can warm me up afterwards" he replied

A few days later and the family spent another day on the beach. The weather was warm and the sea was a crystal blue.

"Can't believe we've got to go back to Southfork in two days time" JR said

"Time always goes fast when you're having fun" Sue Ellen replied

"We've still haven't decided what we're going to do" JR said "I mean do I buy the Southern Cross off Clayton or do we find somewhere in Dallas"

"Or do we stay at Southfork" Sue Ellen answered

"John Ross loves Southfork and so do I but just at the moment I don't feel I can face going back there yet alone living there" JR said "Beside momma may not want three crying babies"

Sue Ellen sighed "Let's see what happens when we go home" she said "I'd prefer to stay in Dallas though…I think San Angelo is a bit out of the way"

"Come on let's go and help the boys with their sandcastle" JR said "Hey you two do you want some help"

"Sure daddy" John Ross said

"Well let's see….you know what we could build a moat around the castle and then make it go down towards the ocean so that when the tide rises it will let the water in. We can also decorate with shells and put four sandcastles made from your buckets on each corner" JR said

"Okay…let's get to work" Christopher said

The four of them built the sandcastle…making it tall and wide then dug out a moat leading down to the ocean. Then JR and Sue Ellen sent the boys off to look for shells while they make sandcastles with the buckets.

"I do believe you're having fun" Sue Ellen said

"I sure am" JR laughed "This beats making oil deals. Thanks"

"What for" Sue Ellen asked

"For showing me what a family really is" He replied "For showing me what love really means and for being here and making me realize that I'm not alone"

Gently she stroked his face "I love you…..and whatever happens at Southfork we will face it together…face Miss Ellie together and if she blames you for Gary not being there while we were on holiday then we'll find somewhere else to raise our family" she said

JR kissed her "Okay" he said

The following morning JR woke early and decided to go down to the beach to watch the sunrise. After getting dressed he decided to leave a note on the pillow for Sue Ellen before setting off down the beach. He walked down by the shore and sat down waiting for the sun to creep over the horizon.

Sue Ellen woke up ten minutes later and after reading JR's note decided to follow him down onto the beach. She found him sitting cross-legged near the shore. Quietly she crept up behind him and sat down. Putting her arms around his neck she kissed his cheek. JR laughed as she hugged him tightly.

"Did I wake you?" he asked

"No….I woke up, reached for you and you weren't there" she replied

"I left you a note" JR said

"I know…I read it and decided to come and look for you" she smiled

Sue Ellen stood up and walk around in front of JR , finally sitting in his lap.

"I thought I'd get up early and watch the sunrise" JR said "I haven't done that in a long time"

"It's so peaceful here…..even the ocean is still" Sue Ellen said

"I used to do this all the time with grandpa when we went camping. We both used to wake up early and then go and sit by the lake and watch the sun rise over the horizon" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "I remember doing the opposite with my dad. Whenever we went to the beach we would stay there until the sunset…and watch it disappear. I used to love the colours that appeared in the sky…sometimes it seemed that the sun and the sky were on fire and other times it would be a softer shade of pink" she said "We used to watch it disappear over the horizon. I remember me asking him once where it went to and he told me that they needed it in Australia for a little while but it would be back the next day. And sure enough he was right….every night it would disappear and then the next day it would come back"

"Funny how we believe everything an adult tells us when we're young" JR said

"You mean to tell me that the sun doesn't go down to Australia and then come back at dawn" Sue Ellen laughed

JR hugged her tightly and kissed her "Who knows….just like the moon is made out of cream cheese" he laughed

"Hmmm I fancy some cream cheese…don't supposed you'd go up there and get some for me" Sue Ellen laughed

JR shook his head and laughed "Maybe later" he said

Both sat in silence for a while as the sun crept over the horizon and rose in the sky.


	7. Chapter 7

Both sat in silence for a while as the sun crept over the horizon and rose in the sky.

"This is perfect…everything is so peaceful this time of morning…do you know I could stay here forever….I know I've said it before but I've never felt so safe, loved or wanted as I do now" JR said

Sue Ellen gently stroked his face "Darlin' nothing's going to change when we get home, I'll still love you and want you and so will our son" she said

JR smiled and pulled her closer to him "I know…hey do you still want to renew our wedding vows?" he said

"Of course…maybe we could do it on New Year's Eve" she said "That way we start a new year making a new and lasting commitment to each other"

"I'm committed to you now!" JR laughed

"I know but we make our vows in front of friend and family and let them know that this time nothing is ever going to separate us" Sue Ellen said

"Sounds good to me" JR said

"Let's get back…I'm sure the monsters will be up now" Sue Ellen said

Hand in hand they walked back to the beach house, they walked into the living room to find John Ross and Christopher sat in front of the television.

"Are you two hungry…it's time for breakfast" Sue Ellen called to them

The two boys got up from where they were sitting and walked into the kitchen.

"Where have you been?" John Ross asked

"Watching the sunrise on the beach" JR replied "You were asleep"

"When are we going home?" Christopher asked

"The day after tomorrow" Sue Ellen replied "Why don't you like it here with us"

"Yes….but I miss momma….and daddy but he's never coming back is he" Christopher replied

Sue Ellen walked over to Christopher and crouched down in front of him, pulling him towards her she held him tightly.

"No sweetheart but you still have your momma and Mark and you still have us" she said "We're not going anywhere for a long, long time"

"Come on you two let's have something to eat then we can go and make some more sandcastles" JR said

After breakfast the family made their way down onto the beach with a picnic lunch that Sue Ellen had prepared. JR took the boys to explore the rock pools while Sue Ellen rested on the beach. Her thoughts were filled with the prospect of going home and what would happen once they were back in Dallas. Christopher and JR, one wanted to go home to his momma while the other wanted to stay away. Somehow she had to get Miss Ellie and JR to talk but she didn't know how..there seemed to be a distant between them almost as wide as the Atlantic Ocean. Although she was relieved to see that JR had managed to accept the fact that Jock wasn't his father…he may not like it but at least it didn't seem to upset him like it had in the beginning. Realizing that she could no longer see JR or the children she decided to go back into the house to lie down for a bit. Walking into the house she sat down on the sofa then looking at the phone decided to pick it up and phone Southfork. Clayton answered on the third ring.

"Hey Clayton…how are you?" Sue Ellen said

"Fine" Clayton replied "How's the holiday going?"

"Nearly over unfortunately but we've had a great time" Sue Ellen said

"How's JR?" Clayton asked

"He's okay….but he's not looking forward to going home…especially since Gary didn't turn up" Sue Ellen said "He thinks Miss Ellie's going to blame him"

"She won't" Clayton said "We had a long chat when I came back from the Southern Cross. I think things will be okay"

"I hope so….I don't really want to leave Dallas or Southfork" Sue Ellen said

"We cleared out your old room the other day" Clayton said "I think we might me able to get three cribs in there"

Sue Ellen laughed "Yeah but there wont be much room for anything else" she said

"Miss Ellie did suggest we create another nursery or even knock two rooms into one" Clayton said

"hmmm….let's see what happens when we get home. Is Miss Ellie there" Sue Ellen asked

"No….she went out a while ago to do some shopping" Clayton replied

"That's a shame….I wanted to have a chat with her….see if I can break through the barriers that seem to be dividing her and JR" Sue Ellen said

"I know she's looking forward to you coming home and sharing this pregnancy with you" Clayton said

"Yes but don't forget that three weeks ago she was please we were going away so that she could have her precious Gary there, then when he doesn't turn up she's pleased to have us back. Is that because she wants at least one of her sons on Southfork even if it is only JR or because she really does love JR." Sue Ellen said

"What Ellie is feeling is complicated…I don't know if I understand why she behaved the way she did but I really think she's ready to talk to JR… I think they can work this out" Clayton said

"I hope so…I'll see you in a couple of days" Sue Ellen said

"Looking forward to it…say hello to JR and the boys for me" Clayton said

"Bye Clayton and tell Miss Ellie I called" Sue Ellen replied

After getting off the phone Sue Ellen went to make herself a cup of coffee, she walked out of the living room to find JR standing in the kitchen.

"How long have you been there?" she laughed "And where are the children?"

"I just walked in" JR replied "We came back from exploring the rock pools to find you gone so I told the boys I would look for you. What are you doing?"

"I just phoned Southfork and spoke to Clayton, I was hoping to speak to Miss Ellie" Sue Ellen said

"Why?" JR said

Sue Ellen sighed "Because I want to try and put things right. JR you're my husband and I love you so much….I hate to see you hurting and I know you're hurting even though you put on a brave face" she said "Maybe I can get through to her…..make her see the other side of you, show her that you do have feelings"

JR placed his hands on her shoulders and looked into her eyes "Darlin' I'm fine and as long as I have you then I'm happy. I faced up to the fact that momma and daddy didn't love me years ago and what has happened over the past few months have proved that" he said "All I need to know is that you and John Ross love me"

Sue Ellen smiled "We do" she said "Clayton seems to think that Miss Ellie is ready to talk to you….he has a feeling that she wants to put things right. She's even talking about knocking two rooms into one so we have a big nursery for the triplets. He thinks she wants us to stay"

"Well we're find out in two days' time" JR said "Come on let's go and get something to eat before those two monsters find the picnic basket and eat all the food"

Hand in hand they walked down onto the beach "So how many fish did you catch?" Sue Ellen asked

"Well….we caught a few little ones in the rockpools along with a couple of crabs but we put them back!" JR replied

"You know I remember once I went to the beach with Mamma and Kristin and we went fishing in the rockpools. Kristin caught a crab, mamma told her to put it back which she did after she tore the legs of it. She was only six at the time!" Sue Ellen said

"So you're sister's always had a vicious nature" JR laughed

Sue Ellen shook her head, hoping her son would not turn out the same. After having lunch the family played on the beach, making sandcastles decorating them with shells and seaweed. Later JR and Sue Ellen took them swimming in the sea. Sue Ellen watched as JR swam with back and forth with John Ross and Christopher taking turns riding on his back. Time went by too quickly, the family stayed on the beach still sunset and sat watching the sun turn red and disappear below the horizon.

"Where does the sun go to?" Christopher asked

Sue Ellen laughed "Australia" she replied "They're getting up just as we're going to bed"

"They're on other side of the world aren't they" John Ross said

"Yes" His father replied

"Does that mean they walk upside down?" Christopher asked

"No" Sue Ellen replied "But they have their summer when we have our winter, so they have hot Christmases and spend them on the beach"

"Wow that would be cool" John Ross said

"I don't know I prefer Christmas to be cold…it seems unnatural for it to be hot" JR said

"But then if you were Australian it would seem funny for Christmas to be cold. Guess it works both ways" Sue Ellen said

Christopher looked up at the sky and watched as the colours changed from red to pink with shades of orange and gold "The sky looks so pretty" he said

After the sun had set the family went back indoors for supper before Sue Ellen and JR read the two boys a bedtime story. Having settled them down for the night the couple went in to the living room and sat curled up on the sofa for a while reliving their holiday memories and looking forward to the future. The next couple of days passed quickly, JR realized he had never felt more relaxed than he did during this holiday. The Disney holiday had been exhausting at times whereas the beach he found relaxing. All his life he had wanted to feel that he belonged and now he felt like he did. He loved Sue Ellen and John Ross with all his heart and finally felt that he understood how much they loved him. The family prepared for their journey home. As their plane took off for Dallas Sue Ellen looked at JR, seeing the tension in his eyes she squeezed his hand and lay her head on his shoulder. JR tenderly kissed her head.

"I love you" she said "And as long as you hold on to that nothing else matters"

"I love you too" JR replied

**Southfork**

Miss Ellie sat nervously on the patio, knowing in a few hours time her son would be home but not knowing how he would feel about her. Something told her that he would hate her forever; she'd destroyed his life by telling him that the father he adored was not his father and then afterwards had refused to tell him anything about his real father. She feared it was too late to put things right. She was so lost in thought that she didn't hear Clayton come up behind her.

"Miss Ellie" he said

She jumped and turned around "Sorry…I was miles away" she said

"JR and Sue Ellen will be home shortly" Clayton said "I guess the peace will be shattered" he laughed

Miss Ellie stood up "I have to go" she said

"Go where….don't you want to be here when they come back" Clayton asked

Miss Ellie looked at him with tears in her eyes "I…I can't….I know JR hates me and I don't know if I can handle that" she said

"You need to talk to him" Clayton said "If you're not here when he gets back he's going to think that you don't care"

"Clayton…it's no good….don't you see I've destroyed him; all his life, everything he did was for Jock now he knows that that was in vain; Jock wasn't his father" Miss Ellie said

"If you don't stay and talk to him…you'll lose him forever…is that what you want?" Clayton said

"No." she said "I'm going for a walk"

Clayton watched her walk away from him knowing he could do nothing he decided to go to the barn and do some more work on the cribs. An hour or so later he heard a car drive up the driveway. Walking out of the barn he noticed that it was Pam so hurriedly went back to the house to meet her. After welcoming Sue Ellen and JR home Clayton helped JR lift the suitcases out of Pam's car, Pam and Sue Ellen chatted for a while as JR and Clayton took the suitcases into the house, Pam then left to take Christopher home saying that they would be back for dinner later as Miss Ellie had invited them. Standing on the patio watching Pam drive away JR turned to Clayton and said.

"Where's momma?"

Clayton didn't really know what to say "Ahm, she went for a walk…she'll be back soon" he said "Why don't you come to the barn and look at the work I've done on the cribs. I hope you'll be pleased"

"JR, you and John Ross go with Clayton….I'm going to see if I can find Miss Ellie" Sue Ellen said

"You're supposed to be resting" JR said

"I'm fine….I rested on the plane" she said as she kissed his lips "Now do as you're told"

"Daddy I'll race you to the barn" John Ross said

Sue Ellen watched the three men go off in the direction of the barn before setting off along the pastures. Finding Miss Ellie was going to be easy but talking to her was going to be the difficult part. She finally saw Miss Ellie sitting against the treehouse' tree opposite Bobby's grave. Quietly she walked towards her.

"Miss Ellie" she said as she stood in front of her

Miss Ellie looked up and smiled "Hi" she said

Sue Ellen sat down by her "How are you?" she said

"I'm fine…how are you" she said "And JR and John Ross"

"We're fine….JR and John Ross are with Clayton in the barn. Why don't we go back up to the house…I could do with a coffee" Sue Ellen replied

"Okay" Miss Ellie said standing up.

They walked back to the house in silence, neither woman knowing quite what to say. Finally after making some coffee they went into the living room.

"How is JR?" Miss Ellie said

"He's fine…..I think he's a little disappointed that you weren't here to meet him but I think he expected that" Sue Ellen said

"I couldn't face him….looking into his eyes and seeing hate" Miss Ellie said "I know he hates me and I don't blame him"

Sue Ellen looked at the other woman and saw the tears in her eyes "Miss Ellie please tell me what you're thinking. I want to help but I can't do that if you wont talk to me" she said

"It's complicated…I don't even know where to start" Miss Ellie said "The truth is I was too scared to love my own son"

"Why" Sue Ellen asked

" I was twenty years old….and I had just conned a man who I didn't particularly like into marrying me knowing that I was pregnant by the man I love. The day JR was born was the happiest day of my life…he was beautiful but I saw Digger in his eyes. I think I knew then I had to be careful; I needed to draw back from him and create a firm bond between him and Jock which is why I left his upbringing to Jock. It scared me to think of what would happen if Jock ever found out the truth" she said "I don't know how I could be so scared to love my own child"

"But do you love JR?" Sue Ellen said "Or is he second best to Gary and Bobby"

Miss Ellie looked at Sue Ellen as she spoke "I have put up so many barriers between me and JR…to keep us both safe but yes I love him more than anything possibly more than Gary or Bobby, because he was Digger's son and Digger was my first love. I hated the way Jock bullied him but I was too scared to do anything about it….I needed to keep out of JR's life for his own sake" she said

"JR has talked a lot about his grandfather" Sue Ellen said "They seemed to have had a close relationship"

"They did" Miss Ellie said "JR would follow him everywhere; daddy called him 'his little shadow'. I know I told you that JR had never cried over anyone but I remember the night daddy died. For twenty minutes I stayed outside JR's door listening to him cry wanting desperately to hold him in my arms but knowing I couldn't"

"I think JR felt unlovable; in fact I don't think he understood the concept of love until now. These past few months when he's opened up to me completely has brought us closer together; it's taken me almost eighteen years but I finally understand him" Sue Ellen said "How do you feel about him now?"

"I love him; he's the one part of Digger that I could never lose but he must hate me for what I've done to him" Miss Ellie replied

" I don't think he does…he just thinks that you don't love him as much as you did the other two, that you're going to blame him for Gary not being here" Sue Ellen said

"Sue Ellen I've spent the last three weeks wishing you were back here….to be able to talk to JR and explain things. Only today I couldn't face seeing him and having him telling me that he no longer wanted me in his life that he was going to move away" Ellie said

"JR only wants what's best for his family…he doesn't want you looking at his children and wishing that it was Gary's children here instead" Sue Ellen said "He's also thinking ahead to when you're no longer around and Gary inherits Southfork…he doesn't want to be thrown off his own home by his brother. That's the only reason he's considering leaving Southfork" Sue Ellen said

"Southfork belongs to JR…it always has and it always will. My daddy made me promise that it would go to him. And as for JR and his children they're not second best. Like I said I love JR more than anything but I was just too afraid to show him" Miss Ellie said

"Miss Ellie you're going to have to talk to him" Sue Ellen said "He needs to hear how you feel"

"I don't know how to" Miss Ellie "I've always kept my distance from him"

"Just tell him what you told me" Sue Ellen replied "Speaking of JR I think I can hear him now"

JR appeared at the living room door; Sue Ellen got up and walk to him, kissing him lovingly on the lips.

"Where's my son" she said

"Clayton needed to check something in one of the pastures so John Ross has gone with him, I decided to come and check on you" JR replied

"Well I'm going upstairs to have a rest…I think your momma would like a word with you" Sue Ellen said

Sue Ellen went to walk past him but JR pulled her back "Sue Ellen, stay" he said his eyes pleading with her "Please"

Sue Ellen looked at Miss Ellie and back at JR "It's okay" she said stroking his face

"Don't go" JR said "There's nothing momma can say to me that you can't hear"

Sue Ellen hesitated before taking JR's hand, leading him into the living room. Both of them sat opposite Miss Ellie on the sofa, Sue Ellen snuggling into JR and leaning her head on his shoulder.

"Momma what is this about" JR asked

"I think it's time you knew the truth" Miss Ellie said "There have been too many lies and misunderstandings for too long"

JR gripped Sue Ellen's hand as Miss Ellie started to speak "First of all you have never been second best to me" Miss Ellie began "I have always loved you in some ways more than Bobby and Gary but I was also scared to love you"

"Why" JR said

"JR, I was just twenty years old when I married Jock and I didn't love him, worse than that was that I convinced him that I was carrying his baby when I knew that it wasn't. The day you were born was the happiest day of my life but it was also the scariest. When I looked into your eyes I saw Digger and was so scared that Jock would see the same. You were the child of my first love and I had an overpowering feeling of love for you but I knew I had to hide that and try and forge a bond between you and Jock. I hated to think what would have happened had Jock ever found out the truth so I let go of you and let him bring you up. I hated the way he brought you up and the way he bullied you but I felt helpless, I didn't know what to do but I wasn't happy about it. Over the years I hated what you became so it was easy for me to withdraw from you and put all my energy into looking after Gary, but to be honest I didn't love him anymore than I did you."

"Did you love Digger" JR asked

"Yes, very much and if things had been different and Southfork had been safe and not in debt I would have married him. I remember him coming to the hospital after I had the mastectomy, he was so gentle and loving; I felt awful as though I was no longer a complete woman but he told me I was just as beautiful then as I was when he first knew me. He was the complete opposite of Jock; his only flaw was his drinking" Miss Ellie said "I don't think I have ever stopped loving him although I began to love Jock it wasn't in the same way"

"So why did you let me feel so unloved" JR said

"I can't answer that because I don't know" Miss Ellie said "But I do know I was wrong to treat you the way I did over the years and I hope you can forgive me. At the end of the day I was scared of Jock finding out the truth"

"I always felt the only person who ever loved me as a child was grandpa…I cried buckets when he died I felt so alone" JR said

"I know" Miss Ellie said "Believe it or not I was standing outside your bedroom door listening to you cry that night your grandfather died, but I couldn't do anything"

"So you don't hate me" JR said

Sue Ellen looked into his eyes and seeing the tears form snuggled up closer to him.

"NO…JR I love you so much and I'm sorry for the way I treated you as a child and for the way I treated you when you found out about Digger being your father" Miss Ellie said "The question is where do we go from here. Are you still planning on moving away from Southfork"

"Momma I don't know…I want to do what's best for Sue Ellen and my children but I also need to think of the future and what happens when you're no longer here. I know Gary will inherit Southfork and I don't want my family thrown off the ranch they've lived on all their lives by him" JR said

"JR you don't know anything" Miss Ellie smiled "Southfork belongs to you. When your grandfather died he made me promise that you would inherit Southfork when anything happened to me. He worshipped you JR"

JR felt his tears flow "Momma do you really want us to stay or are you just upset because you know you'll never see Gary's children on this ranch" he said

Miss Ellie stood up and walked over to him, crouching in front of him she took his hand "No JR, I want you to stay because I love you and I've missed you three so much" she said

JR looked at Sue Ellen "What do you think?" he asked her

"You know I will do whatever you want" she said

"Momma you honestly don't mind having three babies in the house" he said "It could get very noisy"

"No" Miss Ellie replied

JR sighed "Okay…we'll stay" he said

Miss Ellie hugged her son knowing that they may have a long way to go to put right the wrongs of the past but at least they made a start. JR felt the tears in his eyes but this time they weren't for sorrow; they were tears of relief that at least one of his parents did love him.

JR sat outside on one of the patio chairs enjoying the peace of the early evening at Southfork. Pam and Mark were due for dinner within the hour and Sue Ellen was resting. He didn't hear Miss Ellie come up behind him.

"JR" she said quietly

JR turned around to face her "Hello" he said "I forgot how much I loved the evenings out here"

Miss Ellie laughed "I never figured you were that interested in the outdoors" she said "I thought your main interest was Ewing Oil"

"How do you feel about grandpa leaving this to me?" he asked

"I promised him that you would inherit it…I didn't think anymore about it until now. Let's face it Gary wouldn't want it anyway and I remember seeing you follow your grandfather all around this land when you were little so I guess it was only right that you should inherit Southfork" she replied

"Sue Ellen and I have been talking a lot about the past and we were talking a couple of days ago about when I mortgaged Southfork to pay for the Asian fields. Grandpa would have disowned me especially as we nearly had to drill for oil on Southfork land. I feel so guilty about the things I've done, the people I hurt especially Sue Ellen" JR said

"That was the side of you I didn't like and it….it made it so easy for me to not allow myself to feel anything for you." Miss Ellie said

"It's not a side of me I liked either" JR said "It's taken me a long time to realize that the things I've done are nothing to be proud of….I know grandpa would have hated me"

Miss Ellie sighed "Perhaps if your grandfather had been alive when you were growing up things would have been different" she said "He wouldn't have let Jock bring you up and push you into the oil business"

"So what was Digger really like….daddy always said he was a drunk and a loser who couldn't take the fact that he lost Ewing Oil and you" JR said

"Like I told you before he was loving, gentle and compassionate something Jock wasn't. He always saw people as his equal and never looked down on anyone or thought he was better. It's funny but I was watching you before you left on holiday. I was looking through old photographs and heard laughter so I went to the window and saw you and Sue Ellen on the patio. You were walking hand and hand towards the barn, laughing and joking then you stopped and picked her up in your arms and swung her round and for a minute I saw Digger and me, there was gentleness about you that Digger had. We used to spend hours walking around the ranch sometimes talking and sometimes in silence but just enjoying each others company" Miss Ellie said "I think the hardest thing I ever did was choose Jock over him"

"What do you think he would have done if you had told him?" JR said

"He would have stood by me, I know that but the problem was we wouldn't have had any security and I don't think we would have been able to keep this place. Digger was just so unreliable….he could find oil anywhere but he just wasn't any good with anything to do with the business side of things. His attitude was live for the day and tomorrow will take care of itself. Every time he struck oil he'd go out and celebrate for at least five days" she replied

"Don't you think knowing that you were pregnant would have given him a different aspect on things" JR said

"I really don't know…..I think he would have made an excellent father but something inside me told me that Jock would make the better husband" she said "I went to Jock to give us both security"

"You told me Jock loved me….but he didn't. All my life….everything I did was for his approval but I never really got it. I think he knew I wasn't his son." JR said

"JR…there's nothing we can do about the past, we have to move forward into the future" Miss Ellie said "Are you willing to try"

JR looked at her still feeling unsure of what she really felt about him "I don't know….I….I know I said we'd stay here but I'm scared…scared that in a few years you're going to look at me and my children with disappointment in your eyes because I'm not Gary or Bobby for that matter" he said

Miss Ellie walked closer to him "JR….I love you but I've always been too scared of the truth to let myself love you properly but now there's no secrets…no more lies everything has changed….I don't have to hide how I feel about you anymore. From the moment I first held you in my arms I loved you….you are Digger's son the only connection I have to him…believe me I never loved Gary more than you" she said "In fact I've never loved anyone as much as I love you….but you made it difficult"

"But momma…you never stood up for me against daddy. I can remember being seven years old and wanting to stay home and go to the movies with you, Gary and his friends as part of his birthday party and I was told I had to go into Ewing Oil….you could have told him that you wanted me to go with you. I also remember the time out in the pastures when something scared the horse I was riding…it threw me off it…I was hurt pretty bad but daddy told me to grow up and stop crying and went off to find the horse. I always felt that there was noone on my side"

"I'm sorry….if I could turn back time I would do things differently but I can't….but please stay, Southfork belongs to you and noone can take that from you"

JR smiled "You do realize that by Christmas this place will have four children in it…three of which will be under a month old" he said "You sure you want us to stay"

"Yes" Miss Ellie said "Beside you're going to need as much help as you can get"

"This time is going to be different though, last time Sue Ellen went through the pregnancy alone but I want to enjoy this with her" JR said "I'm going to make you proud of me"

"How is Sue Ellen?" Miss Ellie asked

JR laughed "She's fine….these past few weeks we've reached a new level of understanding. I know I can trust her with anything. The night you told me about Digger I felt devastated and I shut her out because I couldn't let her see me upset…but then she found me and took me in her arms while I cried. She didn't make me feel any less of a man because I showed my emotions. I don't think I've ever felt so close to anyone as I do to her. I think both of us have put the past behind us and are looking forward to the future with our children" he said "She's my strength with her I can do anything. She believes in me and she gives me so much"

"She loves you JR, she always has" Miss Ellie said "I'm so glad you've finally realized that. Did you have a look at her old room…I was thinking we could make two rooms into one for a bigger nursery"

"I don't know….as long as we have enough room for three cots we'll be okay. I don't want to knock holes in Southfork if I can help it" JR said "But I never realized that the guest room was so big"

"Clayton would love it if you asked him to help you decorate" Miss Ellie said

"Yeah…I was planning on it as I have very little decorating skills" JR said

"He told me you haven't asked him how things are at Ewing Oil"

"Ahh" JR said "Well I knew he'd take good care of it and I've got other things on my mind. I was going to ask him if he'd consider helping me out full time….I just don't want it taking over my life again"

"I'm sure he will" Miss Ellie said

Their conversation was interrupted by the sounds of footsteps coming onto the patio, they both turned to see Sue Ellen coming towards them.

JR smiled "Hey…I thought you were resting"

"I was….but I knew it would be dinner time soon and I'm hungry" she replied "When will Pam and Mark be here"

Miss Ellie looked at her watch "In about half an hour" she said "Which reminds me I better get ready"

She walked away leaving JR and Sue Ellen on the patio. JR put his hands around Sue Ellen's waist and held her tightly; she leant her head back against him. He kissed her forehead.

"I've missed this place" she said "No matter how many people are around it always manages to be so peaceful at night"

"Peaceful" JR laughed "With us here….do you remember some of the arguments we've had. The wine stain on the wall by the stairs; the $200 a gram perfume bottle you decided to throw at me once. The slamming of doors when one of us would storm out of a room after a row. Hardly peaceful darlin'"

Sue Ellen smiled "I also remember the good times….the times we were so good together"

"We are good together" JR said "There was always a kind of magic between us whether we were hating or loving each other and even now it's still there"

"I know I could never truly leave you….part of me would always belong to you" Sue Ellen said "Now whatever it is that draws us together is even stronger"

"So are we going to stay here or not?"

Sue Ellen laughed "You know my views on that….but it's entirely up to you"

JR turned her to face him and looked deep into her eyes "It's the perfect place to bring up children; we're surrounded by family so I think we'll stay put. You should see what Clayton's done with the cribs…he's managed to paint the same scene on them that's on the wallpaper…I never thought he was so talented"

"I noticed all the furniture has gone from my old room…it seems bigger than what I thought it was"

"Momma said we could knock through into the next room but I don't think that there's any need to maybe when they're older we can have two rooms for them"

"We could have the girls sharing one room and Aaron having his own room or he could go in with John Ross" Sue Ellen said

"Are you sure about calling our son Aaron" JR said

"Of course….if we have a son he's going to be called Aaron Southworth Ewing…I promise. Now we've just got to find the girls some names"

JR laughed "You've got it all worked out. How can you be sure we wont have three boys or three girls"

"We don't know but its fun just trying to imagine what they'll be like, beside I like the idea of two girls and a boy that means we've got two of each" Sue Ellen replied

"Then for your next pregnancy we could have twins, one girl and one boy or even quads and have two girls and two boys"

"Don't push your luck JR!"

"Come on let's get ready for dinner and find our son" JR said

At seven o'clock Pam and Mark arrived with Christopher, after dinner they sat in the living room chatting.

"So how was your holiday" Pam asked "Christopher hasn't stopped talking about it all afternoon"

"It was fun wasn't it John Ross" Christopher piped up

"Yeah….daddy got wet on 'splash mountain'" John Ross said

"I still can't see what the attraction is of getting plunged into freezing cold water then having to walk around the place soaking wet" JR said

"You enjoyed it JR….how many times did you go on it….I think twenty is about right" Sue Ellen laughed

"I didn't have much choice seeing as you wouldn't" JR said

"In my condition!" Sue Ellen laughed

"Momma got lots of pictures" John Ross said

"Yeah…em… well son, I'm going to have to negotiate with your momma about those" JR said "I can't have my reputation ruined"

"I was thinking of going into town next week and getting them developed" Sue Ellen laughed

"Not if I find them first" JR said

"Good job, I've got them well hidden!" Sue Ellen smiled

"I think we did all the rides in the magic kingdom" John Ross said "Then we went and had fun on the beach"

"Yeah…we dug a great big hole and buried Uncle JR" Christopher piped up

"I bet he enjoyed that" Mark said

"We also went swimming, built sandcastles and went fishing in the rockpools…it was so cool" John Ross said

"Not exactly a relaxing holiday" Clayton said

"I don't know about that" Sue Ellen replied "JR did all the hard work, I managed to relax and just watched him get on with it"

"I think the best part was the evening….curling up with the boys on the bed and reading them a story…it just felt comfortable after a busy day" JR said

"So JR…you're going back to work for a rest" Clayton laughed

"Well I was going to talk to you about that" JR said "I was wondering if you would be interested in helping me out full time with the business. I need some time with my family and I don't want to have to devote all my time to Ewing Oil. I done that too often in the past and neglected what was important"

Clayton looked surprised "Well….if I can find someone to help Ray with the ranch… I don't mind helping out, it's been kind of good getting back into the working a company after being away from that environment for so long"

"Okay…and I also need help decorating the nursery…if you're up to it" JR said

"Now that I would love to see the great oil man JR Ewing trying to hang wallpaper" Pam laughed

"There's a first time for everything" Sue Ellen said "Mark how are the preparations going for the next Grayson's fundraiser?"

"There's fine….everything is booked for two weeks on Saturday" Mark replied

"I thought Ewing Oil could pay for all the cost of the fundraiser that way Grayson's research would get all the money without having to pay anything out" JR said

"I can't ask you to do that" Mark said

"You're not…I'm offering" JR said "You've got one hell of a PR who's very persuasive where getting sponsors is concerned"

"Too bad I'm going to lose her in a few months" Mark said

"So you'll let Ewing Oil pick up the bill then?" JR said

"If you're sure" Mark replied

The family continued talking until Pam and Mark decided it was time to take Christopher home as he was beginning to get tired. After settling John Ross in bed Sue Ellen and JR retired to their own room.

"So how do you feel" Sue Ellen asked, knowing how unsettled JR was at the prospect of having to return home after the holiday.

"Okay…I had a chat to momma…but there are still a few things I don't understand" JR said

"Like what?"

"How can you love your child so much yet be so scared to show it affection?"

"We've talked about this before….I was the same way with John Ross for the first few months of his life…..what I remember most is the feeling when I touched him….it was like touching an electric wire…. I couldn't bear it" Sue Ellen said

"But you got over it….momma couldn't bear to show me she loved me throughout my childhood" JR said

"I had help….regardless of what you think of Dr Elby…he helped me see that I needed to trust again….not just for my sake but for my baby's" Sue Ellen said "When you were born Miss Ellie was totally on her own with her secret…there wasn't anyone she could turn to…she must have felt so alone…and I guess her fear of the secret she was hiding being discovered made her distant towards you…I supposed she felt that if she displayed you more affection than the other two Jock might wonder why"

"It doesn't make sense though does it? I mean showing that she loved me didn't mean that her secret would be discovered"

"I know….but she did what she thought she had to do to protect her and you" Sue Ellen said "Only problem was I don't think it did protect you….it just alienated you from the warmth and love of family life. However considering how you were brought up I'm always amazed at your relationship with John Ross…..even though you were deprived of parental love you instinctively know what our son needs….watching you these past few months, your relationship with him has grown"

"I have the relationship with him that I needed from my father. He is not and never will be my business partner….even in 12 years time when I think he's ready to come into Ewing Oil, he will first and foremost be my son. It is just so important to me that he knows that I love him…the one thing I would hate to lose is my family….you and him; that's what kept me going these past few months" JR said

"We're not going anywhere" Sue Ellen said

"There's still that nagging feeling that momma only wants us to stay because she knows she'll never have Gary here" JR said

"Darlin' this is a fresh start….there are no more secrets and no more lies….Miss Ellie has tried to explain how she feels and I think you have to meet her half way. Let her and the rest of the family see the man I see; the man who cares about his family, who will do anything for them. Don't think I didn't notice how you looked out for Christopher while we were on holiday" Sue Ellen said

"Christopher is Bobby's son and I didn't want him to feel left out because his daddy's not around to play with him like I do with John Ross. I've also decided to make sure that Christopher inherits Bobby's share of Ewing Oil"

"I thought Pam gave you that back" Sue Ellen said

"She did but I'm holding in trust for him. Our children will get my shares of Ewing Oil and he will inherit Bobby's" JR said "I want to try and put things right, first with you and John Ross and then with the rest of the family"

"JR you've proved that you want a real commitment with me. I now feel I have what I've always wanted…you…nothing more, nothing less. And you're making a start with the rest of the family including finally letting Clayton be part of us. I think he's always felt like an outside where the Ewings are concerned but with you asking him to make the cribs and work with you in Ewing Oil he finally feels like he belongs" Sue Ellen said "I also think that Mark was surprised by your offer of having Ewing Oil pay for the next fundraiser….it was a generous offer"

"Maybe it's time for Ewing Oil to put something back into the community" JR said "Beside you bring out the best in me"

"Are you still interested in coming with me to my next pre-natal check up" Sue Ellen said

"Sure….when is it"

"Next Wednesday at 2.pm"

"Will we be able to see what's going on in there?" JR asked

Sue Ellen laughed "Hopefully"

"You need to get some rest" JR said "It's been a long day"

The following morning JR got up early and had a shower trying hard not to wake Sue Ellen up. He had something he wanted to do…he wasn't sure it was a good idea but it was something he felt he needed to do. Sue Ellen got up ten minutes later as he was coming back from the bathroom after having his shower.

"Why are you up so early?" she asked

"Couldn't sleep….I'm going for a drive into Dallas….care to join me" JR said

"Sure" Sue Ellen said

After getting dressed they walked downstairs and found Miss Ellie, Clayton and John Ross enjoying breakfast on the patio.

"Hey I thought I was up early" JR laughed

"Daddy….can I go with grandpa and help him on the ranch" John Ross asked

JR looked at Clayton "Is that okay with you?"

"Of course….he can help me paint the cribs; then I'm going up into the pastures and check the cattle then after that if we have time we might strip the wallpaper off the walls in the nursery" Clayton said

"Be good" JR said to his son, as he walked over to him and kissed his head

"Aren't I always" John Ross smiled

"What are you doing today" Miss Ellie asked

"Sue Ellen and I are going to take a drive into Dallas and then we'll be back around lunchtime" JR said "There's something I want to do"

"You're not going into the office?" Miss Ellie asked

"It's Sunday…no I'm not going anywhere near Ewing Oil" JR said

After breakfast Clayton and John Ross headed off towards the barn while Miss Ellie went to the den to catch up with some correspondence. Sue Ellen went upstairs to get ready to go out leaving JR alone on the patio. Going over towards his mother's flower bed, he gently picked a yellow rose.

"Where are we going?" Sue Ellen asked as she got into the car

"Just something I need to do" JR said

They drove in silence into Dallas, Sue Ellen trying to decipher what was going on in JR's brain. Sensing her watching him he took her hand and squeezed it. They stopped outside a cemetery. Sue Ellen looked at JR.

"Why are we here" she asked

"I just want to go up to the grave" JR said "I don't know why but it's something I have to do"

"Is this a good idea…what if Cliff's here" Sue Ellen said

"I don't know….if he's there I'll walk away but it's something I want to do. You don't have to come you can wait here" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at him "Hey….I love you…of course I'm coming with you" she smiled

JR got the yellow rose from the back seat and they walked hand in hand up the cemetery path. Finding the gravestone they wanted Sue Ellen stood while JR placed the rose on the grave. JR took out a bottle of water he had brought with him and picked up the empty vase that lay on the grave. He then placed the rose in the vase.

"Yellow Rose….the sign of forgiveness" Sue Ellen said

"Among other things" JR said "I don't know what to feel but I need him to know that I'm sorry about everything. My whole life Daddy told me he was a drunk and a loser but I never really knew him and now I find out he was my father someone I should have looked up to, someone I should have loved but I didn't"

"You didn't know, JR" Sue Ellen said

"I wish I had…I wish it had been him who brought me up and not Jock; at least I would have known that he loved me….in the same way that Cliff knew that he loved him even Pam, even though she wasn't his daughter he loved her more than anything" JR said

Sue Ellen felt an over powering sense of love for her husband, she crouched down behind him and put her arms around his neck, gently pulling him towards her.

"I just needed to come down here" JR said "I don't know why…I just did"

"It's okay" Sue Ellen replied

JR stood up and pulled Sue Ellen up "I love you" he said "With you I don't have to prove anything….with you I feel strong and able to cope with anything. Noone has ever loved me the way you have…..noone has ever made me feel safe the way you do. From this moment on everything I do is for you…to give you the life you deserve and to make you happy"

Sue Ellen smiled "I am happy….as long as I have you and our children I'm happy" she said

"Let's go home" JR said

They stood silent looking at the grave one more time then hand in hand they walked back to the car. Both content in knowing that whatever life threw at them they would face it together, united in their love and trust for one another.

JR lay in bed watching and listening to Sue Ellen sleeping beside him. He turned and looked at his alarm clock; it was a little after 7 am, _time to get up_, he thought. However he knew that he'd have to go into work today and wasn't really in the mood so he lay back down and snuggled up to his wife. Sue Ellen's eyes opened as she felt JR move closer to her, turning towards him she looked up and smiled at him.

"Hey, what time is it?"

"A little after 7 am" JR replied "I guess we should think about getting up!"

"Are you going into the office today?" Sue Ellen asked

"Yeah" JR said "It's been over three weeks, I better go and check everything's okay….make sure my children's inheritance isn't going bankrupt"

Sue Ellen laughed

"However" JR said "I have a much better idea of how to spend today"

"JR….I have to go to work, the fundraiser is in two weeks and I promised to meet Pam for lunch" Sue Ellen said

"What time will you be home tonight then?" JR asked

Sue Ellen smiled "Well John Ross is still on holiday so I'm hoping to be finished work by 3"

"Good, I'll make sure I get out of the office early then" JR said

"Okay…so are we going to get up now?"

JR looked at her and a wicked grin formed on his face "No" he said "Not yet"

Sue Ellen laughed as she felt JR move even closer to her. Slowly he kissed his way down her body removing her nightdress as he went, Sue Ellen sighed contently as she reveled in his kisses. Working his way back up her body his mouth found hers and his tongue pushed its way inside, slowly they began making love, moving as one, enjoying the sensations their union gave to them. Afterwards they lay cuddled together as their breathing slowed.

"Hey what are you thinking?" Sue Ellen said

"Just about how happy I am; this just keeps getting better and better. I can honestly say I that I never want this to end. I really don't want to be with anyone else but you" he said

"JR….we were made to be together. You're the other half of me, I've always felt like that but……."

"I never gave you a chance" JR said

"You never gave us a chance, sweetheart….you just kept getting bored with being with one woman" she said

"I'm sorry"

"Hey…we made a pact…..from now on to be true to each other" Sue Ellen said

JR's hand went to Sue Ellen's stomach and he gently rubbed it "Hey I think you're starting to show" He laughed "I can see a little bump"

"Well I've got my fifteen week check up later this week, I think by now they probably can tell the sex of the babies" Sue Ellen said

"Do you want to know" JR said

"Well…I guess it would be more practical…I mean if we know they are all girls we can shop for that but to be honest I'd sooner wait until they're born" Sue Ellen replied "What about you?"

"Don't know….I guess a surprise would be nice" JR replied

"I wonder what would have happened if John Ross had been a girl…I mean everyone just took it for granted that it was going to be a boy" Sue Ellen said

"I think daddy would have been disappointed, but…they would have loved him just the same if he had been a girl" JR said "Only problem would have been the fact that John Ross Ewing III isn't really appropriate for a girl"

Sue Ellen laughed "He's becoming more and more like you…he's picking up your mannerism and he has your wicked grin as well as your sparkling eyes."

"I thought he was more like you" JR said "I can't see me in him"

"I can and so can everyone else" Sue Ellen said "He's a miniature you"

JR kissed her again, Sue Ellen tried to gently pull away knowing that they really did have to get up but part of her didn't want to reject JR's advances she wanted him as much as he wanted her. She was so deeply in love with him. Once again their passion took over and they began to make love to each other, this time with more urgency both feeling a sense of hunger for each other. Finally together they reached the point of no return and relaxed, JR rolling over and pulling Sue Ellen on top of him while she curled up on him, her head on her chest listening to the steady beat of his heart, a heart which beat full of love for her and only her. Ten minutes later they decided it was time to get up and face the world. After eating breakfast and making sure that their son was okay to stay with Clayton and Miss Ellie JR drove Sue Ellen to work. JR stopped at the pavement to Grayson's reaseach and leaned over and kissed her.

"JR….I better go, if I stay much longer we could get arrested for lewd conduct in a public place" she laughed

"Hey what's rude about making love to the one you love" JR said

"Nothing except my momma always told me that it wasn't appropriate to do things like that in a public place" she replied

JR roared with laughter "I see….well don't work too hard and I'll pick you up at 3" he said

"Miss you already" Sue Ellen said as she opened the car door. "You do realize this will be the first time we spent apart in ages"

JR kept watching her as she walked into the building. At the door she turned and waved to him and he stayed put until he could see her no longer. Finally he put the car into drive and drove to Ewing Oil.

Sue Ellen opened the door of her office to find a bunch of yellow roses waiting for her. She smiled as she read the card attached wondering how JR found the time to order them. Mind you JR was a man of many talents, she smiled to herself as she reminded herself of some of those talents. A few minutes later Mark knocked on the door.

"Hi" he said "Welcome back"

"Thanks…we've got a busy few weeks coming up preparing for this fundraiser. I forgot it was so close…I guess we stayed too long on holiday" Sue Ellen said

"Don't worry…everything is sorted and paid for, thanks to your husband. What have you done to him" Mark said

Sue Ellen laughed "I haven't done anything to him. Maybe he's mellowing in old age" she said

"JR said that Ewing Oil will even pay for the decorations to decorate the Oil Baron's" Mark said

"Yes…I want to be able to get into there on the Friday morning before the fundraiser so that we can start to decorate the place….I'm hoping I can get Pam and Miss Ellie to help me" Sue Ellen said

"You needn't do that…we can find someone to do the decorating. You need to relax" Mark said

"Mark…I've been relaxing for he last three weeks…I'm fine beside I love doing things like that…planning the way I want it to look and how the tables are going to be set out"

"Pam said she'll pick you up at 12" Mark said "She's taking Christopher to Southfork"

"That's good…he can help Clayton and John Ross paint the cribs"

"Poor Clayton….I pity him having both those two tearaways to look after" Mark said

"They've been so good while we were on holiday. JR told me that even though Pam gave him back Bobby's share of Ewing Oil, he's keeping it in trust for Christopher" Sue Ellen said

"I thought JR always wanted control of Ewing Oil" Mark said

"Once upon a time" Sue Ellen said

"But not now….what's changed" Mark asked

Sue Ellen sighed "It's complicated"

"Well I'm not going to turn down his generosity…no matter what I think of the man…it means that Grayson's Foundation will get 100 of the profits" Mark said

After discussing their plans for the fundraiser a bit longer, Mark returned to his office, seeing the roses on her desk Sue Ellen picked up the telephone and dialed JR's private line. He answered on the second ring.

"Hi Sweetheart" she said

JR smiled at the sound of your voice "And to what do I owe this pleasure"

"I just wanted to say thanks for the flowers" she said "How did you find the time to order them"

"I'm JR Ewing, nothing is impossible" he replied

Sue Ellen laughed "Pam's taking Christopher to Southfork before meeting me for lunch so that he can spend the afternoon there"

"Poor momma and Clayton having to put up with those two monsters" JR said "Speaking of Pam, I re-opened Ewing23 today"

"The oilfields which profits gets splits between the heirs of both Digger and Jock" Sue Ellen asked

"Yes" JR said

"How does that affect Pam…she isn't Digger's daughter" Sue Ellen said

"Just as I'm not Jock's son…he brought her up as his so she's entitled to a share of the profits as is Ray" JR said "It will be split five ways"

Sue Ellen thought for a moment "I'm just wondering what's Cliff going to think" she said

JR laughed "Probably that I've got a motive and he's going to try damn hard to find out what it is" he said

"I love you so much JR" she said

JR looked at the photograph he kept of her on his desk. His heart filled with pride and longing to be holding her in his arms.

"I love you too" he said "More than life itself"

"I better let you go back to work…see you at three" she said

"You better believe it darlin'" JR said "Love you"

Sue Ellen smiled, she had heard those words from JR's lips so many times over the years, especially when he wanted something but finally she knew that what he said came from the heart, she knew he loved her "Love you too" she replied

Sue Ellen carried on working, busying herself with telephone calls and letters which needed writing to various people who were offering support to the foundation. She hadn't noticed the time until Pam appeared at her door.

"Hey…are you ready to go to lunch" Pam said

Sue Ellen looked up and smiled "Of course" she said

They walked down to the carpark and Pam's car. After getting to the restaurant and giving their order to one of the waiters they began to chat happily.

"So how are you" Pam said "We didn't really get a chance to talk last night"

"I'm fine" Sue Ellen replied "How about you"

"I'm fine…I found out something last week though" Pam said

"What?"

"I'm pregnant" Pam replied

"Wow…that's great…how long" Sue Ellen asked "What did Mark say"

"Hold on" Pam said "First of all I'm only 6 weeks but I haven't told Mark yet"

"Why not" Sue Ellen said

"Mainly because I'm scared that the moment I tell him something will happen and I'll lose the baby just like I did with Bobby's children. After my last miscarriage the doctor said that even though the miscarriage was caused by an accident there was a chance that I could never carry a child to full term" Pam said

"But medical science has come a long way since then…there are things that can be done to prevent you from miscarrying. It doesn't mean that the same thing will happen again" Sue Ellen said

"I know….it's just I prefer to keep it to myself until I know that everything is okay. You're the only person I've told" Pam said "Please don't say anything….not even to JR…especially not JR"

Sue Ellen laughed "Okay…but don't leave it too long before telling Mark" she said

"How's JR" Pam asked "Did Miss Ellie manage to talk to him"

"Yes she did….and JR's okay….the worst time was when he found out. I've never seen him so devastated" Sue Ellen said

"When did all this happen?" Pam said

"About a month before we went on holiday. Strange things had been happening at Southfork…first of all Jock's watch being placed on Bobby's grave, then the picture of Miss Ellie and Digger and finally Ben Stivers revelation that he was Jock. JR wanted to have a blood test done but Miss Ellie was adamant that she didn't" Sue Ellen said

"She wanted to protect him" Pam said

"Yes…but at the time we didn't know that. There was a bad atmosphere in the house for a while, both of them being stubborn but Miss Ellie not giving any reason for her not wanting the test done. Then one night we went out to the movies, when we got back Miss Ellie and Clayton were talking about things as we walked in so we stayed hidden away and listened, we then heard her tell Clayton that Jock wasn't JR's father" Sue Ellen said "Of course JR wanted to know the truth so she had to tell him"

"That night you came to dinner, you asked about what Digger was like as a father…you knew then" Pam said

"JR asked Miss Ellie about Digger and she refused to talk to him about him, told him he wasn't interested in his real father he didn't care about anyone, so I just wanted to know what sort of father he was and you were the only person I could ask" Sue Ellen said

"Miss Ellie told me how she had been so horrible to JR, turning him against her and pushing him away. She also told me how much she loved him but always kept her distance, fearing Jock finding out the truth. I can't believe she chose Southfork over Digger" Pam said

"She did what she thought was right for her son but I don't think I could have done it" Sue Ellen said

"Do you think she did the right thing?" Pam said

"In all honesty no….JR may have been different if he had had two parents who loved him, as it was Jock treated him like a business partner and Miss Ellie always made it look like she preferred Gary. Pam…if you're not brought up with love how can you hope to show it or feel it when you're older. I know if Digger had been allowed to be his father he would have known what love was. JR told me that there have only ever been two people in his life who have shown him love one of them is me and the other was his grandfather who died when he was six years old" Sue Ellen replied

"How is he taking the news now?" Pam asked

"He's okay…I mean I've told him over and over again that it changes nothing….he's still is the man I love and the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. We went to Digger's grave yesterday morning and he put a yellow rose down. I also spoke to him earlier and he's opened up Ewing23 again so that all the heirs of both Digger and Jock will get a share of the profits. I think there's a part of him that would love Digger to be here so that he could talk to him, after all the only thing he knows about him is what Jock told him."

"After everything he's done to him you truly do love him why?" Pam asked

"Because I know a side of him that noone else does. The side of him that loves his son, and loves me….there are times when he can be so protective, these past few weeks with the boys he has spent so much time looking after them, taking them on rides on his own and never complained. Every night we sat with the boys before they went to sleep and read them a story. He allowed them to dig a hole and then bury him to his neck in sand, he took them swimming and explored the rock pools with them. Pam there's a secret side to JR that he only reveals to his family and for that holiday Christopher was part of his family" Sue Ellen replied "Speaking of Christopher JR told me a few days ago that he has put Bobby's share of Ewing Oil in trust for him"

Pam looked astonished "I gave it him back…that's what he wanted all of Ewing Oil to himself"

"At the end of the day it's no longer that important…he wants a legacy to hand down to his children but he's not spending every minute of his life working for Ewing Oil anymore" Sue Ellen said "He's lost too much already to Ewing Oil. Did you know that JR never had a birthday party or that he wasn't allowed to go to his brothers' because he had to work, once JR fell of a horse when he was younger and hurt himself quite badly Jock told him to grow up and went after the horse. There is so much I want to do to put the past right for JR…to make sure that he never feels unloved or second best again"

"I just don't want you to get hurt" Pam said

"Trust me, it's not going to happen" Sue Ellen replied

"How long before the triplets appear" Pam asked

"I don't know I've got a check up in a few days time. They're due in January but I don't think I'll last until then…they're probably be delivered early" Sue Ellen said

"Is JR going to be there, at the birth" Pam asked

"He said he is but I know for a fact he's got a weak stomach" Sue Ellen laughed

"Miss Ellie asked us to spend Thanksgiving this year up at the ranch. Mark feels a bit uncomfortable but I know she'll make him feel uncomfortable. However I think JR may feel a bit on edge"

"Why?"

"Because I was speaking to Clayton a few days ago and apparently Dusty is coming to Dallas around that time. I also get the impression that Clayton has spoken to Dusty about JR and Digger" Pam said "I guess things were going badly between him and Miss Ellie he needed someone to talk to"

Sue Ellen sighed and smiled "JR hasn't got anything to worry about…beside I'm either going to be heavily pregnant around that time or we'll have three newborn children to look after." She said "I wish Clayton hadn't said anything to Dusty…I know he's his son but Dusty isn't the person I would have told. He's got one up on JR now hasn't he"

"I think Dusty just wants you to be happy" Pam said

"I am happy, very happy" Sue Ellen said "And so will Mark be when you tell him about that baby"

Pam laughed "Okay, I will but just not yet" she said

After finishing their meal Pam dropped Sue Ellen back at the office before going shopping. Pam agreed to help Sue Ellen with the decoration of the Oil Barons. The afternoon dragged on for Sue Ellen, for some reason she longed to see JR, today she had really missed him. At three o'clock she looked up from her desk to find his smiling face looking at her. She got up from her chair and going over to him wrapped her arms around him.

"I have missed you so much" she said

"Hmmm, I've missed you too" JR replied

On the way home they chatted about their day. Sue Ellen told JR about her lunch with Pam and what Pam had told her about Thanksgiving. JR wasn't happy with the fact that Dusty might be there but Sue Ellen reassured him that everything would be okay although she didn't tell him that Dusty may know about his father. On arriving back at Southfork they found Clayton and the boys in the nursery tearing the paper off the walls. JR remarked on what a good job they were doing then the couple went to get changed.

"I hope Christopher doesn't take after me" Sue Ellen laughed

"Why?" JR said

"I remember helping daddy take some paper of the walls for the room he was decorating anyway later on he caught me tearing the paper of my bedroom walls. He asked me what I was doing and I told him I was getting the room ready for him to decorate" Sue Ellen said

"He must have been really angry" JR said

"No he wasn't…the funny thing was he never got angry with me….momma did but not him; it was as though his little girl could do no wrong" Sue Ellen said

"He was right there…you are so perfect……warm, loving, tender, beautiful….god I love you" JR said

Sue Ellen kissed him "You're not so bad yourself" she said "JR…I've got an AA meeting tonight….will you go with me"

"I didn't think you were still going to those" JR said

"Only once every two months but it's good to keep in touch…in some ways it helps" she said

JR smiled "Of course I'll come….I want to support you anyway I can just like you've done for me"

"Hey we've got a couple of hours before dinner…our son is being entertained by his grandfather..do you know what I want to do" Sue Ellen said

JR smiled "I can guess"

"Make love to me JR…I want you so much" she said

JR kissed her and lowered her to the bed "For you anything"

An hour later they decided they better get up and headed for the shower. The sound of laughter and splashing of water from downstairs made them smile.

"Those two play so well together don't they?" JR said

"Yes" Sue Ellen replied "I told Pam I'd take Christopher home before I went to the AA Meeting. Are you sure you want to come with me"

"Of course….beside it's lonely here without you" JR said

After showering and getting dressed they went downstairs to join the rest of the family. Miss Ellie was watching Christopher and John Ross play while Clayton had gone to tidy up the nursery after the boys had got carried away tearing the wallpaper of the walls. Sue Ellen decided to needed to talk to Clayton so went back inside. She found him tidying up the nursery.

"Hey" she said

Clayton turned around

"Hey yourself!" he replied "Just tidying up after your son and nephew left this place looking like a bombsite"

"Mmm looks like they got carried away!" Sue Ellen said

Clayton laughed "Yeah…the idea of being allowed to rip paper of the walls was just too much for them. They got very excited"

Sue Ellen looked around the room and smiled "Can't believe this room is so big. It's amazing how much room you can create when you remove the furniture. Maybe instead of cribs we should have been bags for the babies to sleep on" she laughed

"Has JR said anything more about buying the Southern Cross?" Clayton asked

"No….I think he's coming around to the idea of staying on here. Miss Ellie's chat to him helped I think" she replied

"He seems more settled" Clayton said

"I spoke to Pam today. She told me you told Dusty about Jock not being JR's father" Sue Ellen said

Clayton looked at her "I'm sorry….he's the last person I should have said anything to but I just felt so alone…not knowing whether Ben Stivers was really Jock and whether Miss Ellie would go back to him if he was and then her attitude to JR after she told him about Digger. I needed someone to talk to and he was there"

Sue Ellen walked to towards him and gently stroked his face smiling "It's okay…I understand you needed to talk but I just hope Dusty doesn't use it against JR" she said "Pam also said he was thinking of coming down for Thanksgiving"

"Yes he is….I don't think he'll say anything…he just wants to know that you're happy and safe" Clayton said

"I am" Sue Ellen smiled "Truly happy and who knows by Thanksgiving we could have a houseful of children"

"Are you going to tell JR that Dusty knows?" Clayton asked

Sue Ellen thought for a moment, part of her didn't want to tell JR as she was afraid that it would spoil the relationship that Clayton and JR had but another part of her felt she couldn't keep this from him; if he found out some other way and knew that she had known all along he would feel betrayed.

"Clayton, I don't want to tell him but I'm not sure I can keep it from him. What happens if JR founds out that you told Dusty and I knew all along….he'll see it as an act of betrayal that I didn't tell him and I can't let that happen. But don't worry I'll explain to him how alone you felt and needed to talk to someone unfortunately it happened to be Dusty" she said

"He'll hate me and we'll be back arguing again" Clayton said sadly

Sue Ellen smiled "I promise you I won't let that happen" Sue Ellen said "Besides he needs your help to decorate this room"

Clayton looked around "Yeah…well there's a lot of work to be done"

"Well I think you've done enough for today" Sue Ellen laughed "I'll see you shortly"

Sue Ellen walked back downstairs and out onto the patio where JR was sitting drinking a lemonade, on seeing her JR put out his arms and she fell into them.

"Where did you disappear to?" JR asked kissing her cheek

"I went to talk to Clayton about something" Sue Ellen replied

"Oh?" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "I'll talk to you later…but at the moment what exactly are you doing drinking lemonade" she laughed

"Well if I go to the AA meeting with you I can hardly have my breath stinking of alcohol can I? JR replied

Sue Ellen laughed and kissed him the looking at the two boys in the pool she said "Hey you two it's time to get ready for dinner"

"Oh mom" John Ross said

"Come on you two…out of that pool now!" JR said

The two boys reluctantly got out of the pool and went inside to get dressed for dinner. After dinner Sue Ellen and JR read the two boys a story before driving Christopher back home, then went on to the AA meeting. JR sat and listened as Sue Ellen and the other people in the meeting discussed their alcohol problems. The meeting lasted about two hours after which JR and Sue Ellen drove home in silence. Everything was quiet when they reached Southfork. Miss Ellie and Clayton had gone to bed so Sue Ellen went to the kitchen to make a coffee while JR went and sat in the living room. JR felt slightly drained after the meeting and slightly guilty realizing that it was his neglect over the years that had turned Sue Ellen to alcohol but he knew that he would ever again let her feel the need for alcohol. His love for her was forever. After ten minutes Sue Ellen walked into the room with two cups of coffee. Seeing JR laying on the sofa she put the cups on the table and went and snuggled up to him, JR moved slightly to make room for her.

"Hey you've been quiet all the way home" Sue Ellen said "What's going on in that head of yours"

"Just thinking about the meeting" JR said

"I noticed you were looking a bit uncomfortable…you could have gone and waited for me in the car" she said

"No..it wasn't that, although I don't know how people can talk so openly to people they hardly know" JR said "I think what bothered me most was that it was mainly my fault you became….."

"JR this is in the past and I'm not sure it's your fault…sometimes these things are inherited" Sue Ellen said

"When did it start?" JR asked

Sue Ellen was silent thinking back to the early years of JR and her first marriage "I guess in the early years of our marriage. At first it wasn't a problem…alcohol was just comforting when I spent so many nights alone waiting for you to come home" she said "It was something that became a habit after all there has never been a shortage of alcohol in this house"

"Do you remember the barbeque when Pam lost the baby? You were drunk then, I remember finding you and Bobby in one of the fields. You were riding a horse stoned out of you mind, then you asked me if you took all your clothes off and rode naked would let turn me on" JR said

"Yeah and you replied that it might work" Sue Ellen laughed "That was the problem with that period in our lives whatever I did to try and make you want me didn't work. I just couldn't turn you on and yet I loved you more than anything"

JR pulled her closer to him and kissed her "I was young and foolish and I put you on a pedestal. You were perfect and I didn't want anything to spoil that" he said

"How can making love to someone spoil anything?" Sue Ellen asked

JR sighed "I don't know…it was just my way of thinking at the time. Anyway let's get back to the subject"

"I always felt in control of my drinking…even though I drank myself unconscious at times but I think things changed when I got pregnant. When I left you for Cliff I thought at last a man wanted me and I was willing to do anything to make the relationship work but you blackmail Cliff into leaving me and forced me to go home with you. Afterwards I used to call him regularly but he kept rejecting me and then there was you…sometimes you were so cruel. I remember one night going to your office, I think I was due to meet you there but you didn't turn up and I drank you liquor cabinet dry…then I phone Cliff and told him I needed to see him but he had another woman in his apartment. I drove back to Southfork and passed out on the way" she said

"Hmmm I remember that night, Bobby and Pam found you and took you home then when I got home momma told me what had happened and that both you and the baby were in danger and needed help….I told her it was too late for us" JR said

"Yeah then the following morning you threw out all the bottles in our room or at least most of them. What you didn't realize was that I had one or two hidden away in shoe boxes" Sue Ellen said "I remember after you left the room I got out of bed and retrieved one"

JR shook his head "Even when I tried to do the right thing I couldn't help you" he laughed "Then you fell down the stairs…I think at that point I was scared at what might happen next or what you might say so I arranged to have you put in the sanitarium. I have to say that part of me hated doing that but it was for the best"

"Sure it was…I just paid one of the attendants to get me supplies of alcohol" Sue Ellen said "I felt so alone during that time…the only thing the family truly cared about was the baby not me, you didn't want me, Cliff didn't want me…alcohol was the only comfort I had. What I didn't realize was the danger I put myself and John Ross in."

JR held her tighter "After John Ross was born you quit drinking…what made you start up again?" he asked

"I was unhappy for a long time but then there was the Rodeo and Dusty walked into my life. Things changed….I fell in love with him and found myself beginning to trust again which helped me bond with John Ross. Anyway after I had made up my mind to leave you for him I found out that he had been killed in a plane crash and that's what started me off again" she replied "Only when I started drinking that time…I began to get black outs and couldn't remember things which is what happened the night you were shot. I woke up in an airport car park. I think the shock of thinking that I had shot you stopped me drinking again"

JR smiled "You know…the more I think about that time the more happy memories come back to me. Things were great…we couldn't get enough of each other, for once we were a happy family" he said

"I know…the same thing happened after our divorce and for the first few months of our second marriage. I remember the time not long after the divorce that we spent the day in the park with John Ross and the night you brought the video tape of the Miss Texas Paegent. I didn't want you to go home that night" she confessed

"Now you tell me" JR laughed "So the reason you drank was because I made you unhappy"

Sue Ellen thought for a moment "Okay the truth is that when I had you in my life…being faithful, loving me and just spending time with me I didn't need alcohol but when things were bad between us it was my only source of comfort. I remember the time John Ross was in hospital and you blamed me for not being there, I started drinking to drown out the pain and guilt and then Bobby died and you once again tore a strip of me for not being there. The day of Bobby's funeral I wanted to comfort you but……" trying to fight back the tears Sue Ellen stopped speaking.

"I rejected you…told you that you weren't part of this family and to go and find your cowboy. God, Sue Ellen I am so sorry….I lashed out at the one person who could have helped me through my grief" JR said

Tears streamed down Sue Ellen's face "I…I found the nearest bar I could and drank myself into oblivion then I woke up in a hotel room and found my rings missing. I remember looking at myself in the mirror and telling myself that you were right… I was disgusting and I hated myself" she said "That was when I ended up on the downtown streets"

"Darlin' you are not disgusting…I should never had said that. You are the best friend I've ever had and the only woman I want as mother to my children. I know I pushed you too far…I look at you now and I see someone who has grown in a year…you are so strong, maybe stronger than me but I know that if it hadn't of been for you I might of ended it that night I found out about Digger but you showed me that it didn't matter who my father was" JR said

"It doesn't. I love you, I always have…it just you failed to see it" she replied "The time I spent in the Sanitarium the last time made me realize that I had to take responsibility for my own life…I was on my own and if I wanted to see my son grow up I needed to quit the alcohol. That time when someone offered me a drink I rejected it. I don't need it anymore but more than that I know that for my own health I have to avoid it"

"I'm so proud of you" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "I'm proud of you too…the man you've become" she said "Oh before I forget I need to speak to you about Clayton"

"What's wrong with him?" JR asked

"Nothing it's just………." Sue Ellen started

"Go on"

"Well you know how lost he felt when he left Southfork for the Southern Cross?" Sue Ellen said

"When he thought Ben Stivers was Jock and that momma would go back to him?" JR said

"Yes…well you know how people need to talk through problems. When he was up there he talked to Dusty about what was happening at Southfork" Sue Ellen said

"You mean Dusty knows about Jock not being my father" JR said

"' 'Fraid so" Sue Ellen said "Clayton needed to talk to someone he didn't do it to hurt you."

JR sighed "I know but of all the people to talk to. Now that cowboy has something he can use against me" he said

"He won't because I won't let him. I won't let him hurt you. I told you because I felt you needed to know especially if Dusty is joining us for Thanksgiving but I also don't want this to ruin the relationship you have with Clayton now. He doesn't want to go back to the old days of you hating him" Sue Ellen said "Promise me it won't change things"

"Okay" JR said "Hey are you saying that if it's a choice between me and that cowboy..you'd choose me"

Sue Ellen laughed and gently punched him on the shoulder. Taking his hand she placed it on her stomach where their unborn children lay sleeping "What do you think?" she said

JR gently stroked her stomach "I can't believe we've created another life. Everytime I look at you my heart jumps. You are incredibly beautiful and each day you get more radiant." He said

"You won't be saying that in a few months time when I'm fat" she said

"You won't be fat…you'll just be carrying my children" he laughed "And I can't wait to see them grow inside you"

"Don't forget we've got an antenatal check up next week" she said

"I won't…maybe we'll find out what these babies are going to be" JR said

"I thought we agreed that we would wait until they were born to discover which sex they were" she said

"But you know me" JR said "I hate secrets"

Sue Ellen looked at him. Sometimes secrets were not good, weeks ago a long hidden secret had broken JR's heart.

"We'll see" she said

A few days later Sue Ellen went shopping with Miss Ellie. They spent the time looking around baby shops for furniture and other accessories for the new nursery.They stopped to have lunch in a restaurant and look at the photographs of the holiday that Sue Ellen had picked up earlier that day.

"How is JR?" Miss Ellie said

"He's fine…he's looking forward to the babies' birth" Sue Ellen replied "These past few months have been brilliant, he's been loving, gentle everything I've always wanted him to be"

"Has he said anything about Digger?" Ellie asked

"Miss Ellie…we've talked non stop about the past these last few months. I think we've finally reached an understanding and we both feel comfortable talking to each other about anything. As far as I can tell JR is at peace with the fact that Digger was his father and not Jock, he's not entirely happy about it but I think he understands why you did what you did. We visited Digger's grave last week and put some flowers there, he also reopened Ewing23 which gives both the heirs of Jock and Digger equal rights to profits from those wells. One thing though is he thinks Jock knew all the time that he wasn't his father" Sue Ellen said

"I don't know…what makes him think that?" Ellie asked

"Mainly the fact that he felt that he was Jock's business partner and not his son. JR wonders if Jock knew that you lied to him but decided to bring up JR to make things right with Digger for stealing you from him…and Ewing Oil"

"That we will never know" Miss Ellie said as she looked at the photographs in front of her. Sue Ellen picked one up and smiled.

"I think JR had as much fun on those rides as the boys although he'd never admit it" Sue Ellen said "They wanted to go on 'Splash Mountain' every single day and JR just did what they wanted"

"He looks as though he's enjoying himself" Miss Ellie said

"He didn't talk about Ewing Oil once" Sue Ellen said "It was the perfect family holiday. Mind you I think JR was a bit worried when the boys dug a hole on the beach and asked him to get inside as they wanted to bury him"

Miss Ellie laughed "I wish we could have joined you"

"Maybe when the triplets are older…we'll have a family holiday, maybe invite Pam, Mark and Christopher" Sue Ellen said

"I can't believe in a few months Southfork will be full of children" Miss Ellie said

"We're looking forward to it….I'm so glad that JR and Clayton have buried the hatchet and are working together on the nursery"

"So am I, things are so peaceful at the moment" Ellie said "How are the plans for the fundraiser going?"

"Fine…everything's almost organized, JR's been helping me" Sue Ellen said

"So what have you done with the real JR" Ellie laughed

"I think he's finally grown up. He knows his wife loves him, his son adores him and all he needs is his family. He's finally realized what love is" Sue Ellen said "Miss Ellie…I've got what I've always wanted…your son to love me without needing other women. I love him so much"

"I'm so happy for both of you" Ellie said "Have you thought of any baby names?"

"Well the only thing we're definite on is that if one of them is a boy it will be called Aaron Southworth Ewing, but other than that the jury's still out" Sue Ellen laughed

"I never realized how much JR loved his grandfather. I always thought he was cold and unfeeling" Ellie said

"I've always known that there was a human side to him, especially when I see him with John Ross." Sue Ellen said "He just likes to keep that side of him well hidden"

"This is a new start for all of us. No more secrets or lies" Miss Ellie said "I love my son I just didn't understand him at times"

"Well let's see how he reacts when he sees how much money we've spent today" Sue Ellen said

The two women laughed as they finished their meal and prepared to go home. The next day JR and Sue Ellen went for an antenatal check up.

"Well how is everything going" Dr Andersson asked

"Fine" Sue Ellen said

"When will we be able to feel the babies move?" JR asked

"Within the next few weeks" Dr Andersson answered "I'll do a scan now and see how things are developed.

The doctor smeared jelly on Sue Ellen's tummy then started the ultra sound. She pointed out each baby showing the couple the features that were formed.

"Well everything seems to be developing perfectly" the doctor said "I can tell you what sex they are if you want"

Sue Ellen looked at JR and smiled "Well we were going to wait and have a surprise" she said

"But if you sure you know…maybe" JR began

"JR…no" Sue Ellen laughed

"Okay I'll tell you what I will write what they are and seal it in an envelope that way if you decide in a few weeks you want to know then you can" Dr Andersson said

After leaving the doctor's surgery they walked back hand in hand to the car. JR looked at the envelope in Sue Ellen's hand.

"So are you really going to make me wait?" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "Yes….because I want to see the look of joy on your face when you see each child and discover what we have" she said "I really want to wait, I don't want to know"

"Hand me the envelope" JR said

Sue Ellen shook her head "No..you'll open it"

"Won't I promise" he said

Sue Ellen handed JR the envelope. He then proceeded to rip it up. Sue Ellen kissed him.

"I love you" she said

A few weeks later it was the Fundraiser. Sue Ellen, JR and the rest of the family had spent the day preparing the Oil Baron's club for the event and they were now getting ready for the event. Sue Ellen was getting ready when she felt a sudden pain in her stomach. Seeing her bent over JR rushed to her.

"What's wrong" he asked concerned

"Nothing" she smiled "I just felt a movement"

"Where" he said

Sue Ellen took his hand and placed it over her stomach and both waited to feel another sign of life. JR's eyes lit up when he felt another kick.

"That is amazing" he said "Are you sure you want to go out tonight"

"JR, I've been preparing for this for the last few weeks, I'm fine" she said

The night was a success, JR watched with admiration while Sue Ellen spoke to people who she hoped would make donations to the foundation. Never before had he ever felt what he felt now…he felt so much love and pride for his wife that he thought he was going to burst. Finally he managed to tear her away for one dance. JR held her tightly as the music began.

_When I'm down and Oh my soul so weary_

_When troubles come and my heart burdened be_

_I am still and wait here in the silence still you come and sit awhile with me_

JR and Sue Ellen locked eyes, Sue Ellen kissed him and whispered in his ear. The song continued

_You raise me up so I can stand on mountains_

_You raise me up to walk on stormy seas_

_I am strong when I am on your shoulders_

_You raise me up to more than I can be._

JR looked at her…the words of the song echoing in his head. She was his anchor, when things were bad she was there to pick him up and tell him everything would be okay. With her he was strong and could do anything. He placed his lips close to her ear and whispered.

"Sue Ellen…you raise me up to more than I can be. Without you I'm nothing but with you I can be whatever I want to be. I love you more than you will ever know…..I promise you from this moment on I will devote my life to you" he said

Sue Ellen looked into his eyes and kissed him, not caring how many people saw them. The only thing that mattered to her was JR and her family. "I love you" she said "And I promise I will always be there for you"


	8. Chapter 8

**Southfork four months later**

It was the middle of the night when Sue Ellen was awoken by a sharp stabbing pain in her stomach. JR was snoring beside her so she decided to get up and go down to the kitchen and fix herself a warm mug of milk to try and help her sleep. On entering the kitchen she suddenly felt hungry and looked in the fridge for something to eat. Seeing the tub of vanilla ice cream and tomato ketchup she smiled to herself and took them out and put them on the table. Her hand instinctively went to her stomach; gently she stroked it as she once again felt the tiny kick of life growing within her. In less than two weeks the babies would be born and for her and JR life would never be the same although secretly she felt both of them were looking forward to parenthood this time. She was deep in thought with her back to the door that she didn't see JR creep up behind her.

"And what do you think you're doing Mrs Ewing?" JR said

Sue Ellen swung around and looked at him "JR!... Don't you know it's not a good idea to creep up on a heavily pregnant woman"

"I woke up and you weren't there"

"I felt a sharp pain in my stomach and you were snoring so I came down here and suddenly felt hungry"

"No prizes for guessing what you're eating" JR said as he moved closer to her. JR sat down and Sue Ellen got up moving to sit on his lap.

"Ice Cream, tomato ketchup and a bread roll…do you want to try some?"

JR shook his head and laughed "Not really"

Sue Ellen scooped some ice cream onto the spoon and covered it in tomato ketchup then lifted the spoon to JR's mouth "Here…it's lovely, try it"

JR opened his mouth and let Sue Ellen feed him, grimacing he said "That is disgusting"

Sue Ellen laughed "Can I make you a drink?"

"No I'm fine…I just felt lonely without you"

"Can you believe that in less than two weeks time these babies will be here? Time has gone really quickly"

JR was silent for a while contemplating how life would change once the babies made an appearance.

"You know I've really enjoyed this pregnancy….knowing that this time these were my children" he said

"John Ross is yours…he always has been" Sue Ellen said "But I know what you mean….this time has been perfect…you've been by my side every step of the way…we've shared every kick these babies have made….you've been on every ante natal visit with me…it's been a wonderful time for both of us"

"Yeah…can't wait for the next pregnancy" JR laughed

"Hmmmm that wont be for a few years" Sue Ellen said "We are going to have our work cut out with three babies"

JR watched as she smothered her bread roll with ice cream and tomato ketchup and started to eat. He laughed out loud knowing that in normal circumstances this would be the last thing she would eat"

"Tell me…did you have cravings when you were pregnant with John Ross?"

Sue Ellen thought for a moment "To be honest I can't remember….looking back I don't think I was sober long enough however I do remember early on having a hunger for pickled onions and whipped cream"

"I wish things could have been different" JR said "We both missed out on so much of things with our son….neither of us were there for him in his early days"

"I remember lying in bed listening to him cry and getting up knowing full well that Pamela would already be in the nursery" Sue Ellen said "I remember one conversation she had with Mrs Reeves when the nurse told her that she was all the baby had that I didn't care for him. But that wasn't true….I just didn't want to get hurt"

"You've more than made up for those times Sue Ellen, John Ross knows we both adore him" JR said

"I remember one afternoon I went to a DOA meeting the first meeting since the baby was born and the speaker couldn't make it. The replacement was Cliff…I tried to get out of there as fast as I could….but he cornered me and wanted to meet up. The following day I went to his apartment…he just wanted to know about the baby but I told him he didn't need to play the caring father. He accused me of being a parasite….using him to get back at you and now using John Ross as a weapon. I told him I loved my son but he said I wasn't capable of love. I left there in a state and was still upset when you came home…I remember asking you if I had changed and whether I used people but you said I was just the same as I always had been" Sue Ellen said

JR held her tightly and kissed her cheek "Darlin' at that time I don't think any of us knew the real you…including you! You were brought up to believe that money and power were above everything…the most important things in the whole world...strangely enough I don't think I saw the warm, gentle side of you until I was shot…you could be standoffish…you weren't the easiest person. In fact I look at you now and I don't see the person I originally married…I see a better…more caring and loving person….someone I am so proud to have as my wife, even if you do have strange eating habits at the moment"

"We should make the most of the next few weeks….I mean it's going to be a hectic couple of months with sleepless nights and dirty diapers" Sue Ellen said "I also want to spend as much time with our son as possible"

"I noticed you with him this evening while you were reading to him. You look so comfortable snuggled up together" JR said

"He wanted to feel the babies" Sue Ellen said

"We need to think of baby names or else they're going to be called 1, 2, and 3" JR said

"Hmmm…okay what do you think?" Sue Ellen asked

"How about girls names using you initials" JR said

"You mean like Sophie Eleanor?" Sue Ellen asked "Or Susannah Eleanor, Stephanie Eleanor, Stacey Ellen….and that's all the names I can think of starting with S" she laughed

"Hmmm you really want to use Eleanor as a middle name?" JR said

"Aha…"

"Okay out of all those names I like Sophie Eleanor…it sounds such a pretty name"

"Well that's two names we've got so let's choose another girls name and another's boys name" Sue Ellen said

"Okay…let me see….Girls names first" JR said "Emily, Tamarah, Rosie, Caitlin, Jennifer,…"

"Grace, Aimee, Natalie…" Sue Ellen said

"Okay…how about Emily Rose and Sophie Eleanor?" JR asked

"Hmmm I like it….now we need another boy's name" Sue Ellen said "As we don't know whether what we're having"

"Thinking about it we could have three girls or three boys….damn I should never have torn up that piece of paper" JR laughed

"Boys names…let me see" Sue Ellen said "Benjamin, Joshua, Michael, Luke, Mark, Christian, David, Matthew"

"Robert, James, Peter, Andrew" JR said

"You see I would love to call him Robert James…but Gary got there first" Sue Ellen said

"Hmmm…I know" JR said suddenly an idea came to him "How about James Robert…that way he has Bobby's name and my initials"

Sue Ellen kissed him and hugged him tightly "Okay…and for another boy's name we could have "Benjamin Joshua"

"One more girls name then…just in case we have three girls" JR said

"I can't think anymore" Sue Ellen said "Tamarah Alice"

"Where did that come from?" JR asked

"My grandmother's name was Alice and I also like the name Tamarah" Sue Ellen said

JR smiled "Well we've got that sorted out then..now have you finished eating and we can go back to bed"

Sue Ellen looked at the empty tub of ice cream in front of her "It's empty" she said "Might just have to go back and see what's in the fridge"

JR held her tightly, placing tiny kisses on her neck "You are not going anywhere Mrs Ewing"

Sue Ellen laughed "Thought you wanted to go to bed" she pulled free of him and stood up holding her hands out for JR.

JR sat looking at her, thinking how he had never seen her look more beautiful or radiant.

"You are so beautiful" he said

Sue Ellen laughed "I look like a baby elephant" she said

JR shook his head, stood up and wrapped his arms around her "No you don't…you look gorgeous….in fact momma was saying the other day how healthy you look for someone expecting triplets"

"I feel fine…although I'm a little apprehensive about the birth"

"That's understandable" JR said

"I think having an epidural during the C-section so that I'm still awake and aware of what's happening…is the best idea…I want to be able to hold my babies the minute they're born…something I didn't get the chance to do when John Ross was born" she said

"And I'll be right by your side" JR said

Sue Ellen smiled "I know what you're like…you hate the sight of blood"

"After us…the first person I want to see these babies is John Ross" JR said

Sue Ellen's heart jumped when she thought of her beloved son; lately she felt an overwhelming sense of love for him and wondered if it was because of the events leading up to his birth and a need in her to let him know that he was so special to her. She cringed as she thought about her last pregnancy…the drinking, the loneliness she felt and the desperate need to had to feel loved. This time was so different; her and JR had become so close and the bond they shared with their son was deep…they were all so happy.

"What are you thinking?" JR said interrupting her thoughts.

"About how wonderful these past seven months have been….having you beside me every night, knowing that the only woman you want to make love to is me…watching you play with you son" she said

"I think this past year I've learnt a lot…all the things I once held as important are no longer that important….everything I need is in this house. I know we've been over it several times but when my world fell apart you put it back together again. You've taught me so much about being a family and what it's like to love and trust someone completely. I can't imagine feeling this way about anyone else…I think what scares me most is if something happens during the birth of the babies and I lose you…. I really don't think I could cope" JR said

Sue Ellen looked at him and saw tears in his eyes "JR Ewing…listen to me…nothing is going to go wrong. We've got the best medical care..you've made sure of that….I've looked after myself…gone to every antenatal appointment. Everything is going to be perfect. I love you"

"I love you too…come on let's get back to bed"

Hand in hand they walked out of the kitchen into the hallway. As they reached their room, the stopped and walked to John Ross' room, he was fast asleep with his covers on the floor beside him.

"That's child…what am I going to do with him…from the time he was able to he's always kicked his covers off at the first opportunity" Sue Ellen said as she walked towards him. Pulling the covers around him she noticed that he also had his headphones on, not wanting to wake him she left them, gently kissing him on the forehead.

JR walked over and looked down at his sleeping son "He's perfect…no guessing as to what he's listening to"

Sue Ellen smiled "His mother's voice….maybe you should do the same…tape yourself reading him stories then when he can't' sleep he can listen to you too"

"Hmm…I might just do that"

Going back into their room they crawled into bed and wrapped their arms around each other, finally drifting off to sleep.

**Southfork ( A day later)**

Sue Ellen and Pam were enjoying coffee in the living room while Christopher and John Ross played upstairs.

"So how are you?" Sue Ellen asked

"Fine" Pam said "I had a doctor's appointment earlier and everything's fine"

"I told you it would be….." Sue Ellen said

"I know but after miscarrying two babies I didn't want to get my hopes up only to lose this one to"

"Pam….there were reasons for those miscarriages" Sue Ellen said "The fall from the barn loft and the snake scaring the horse. On the subject of the barn, something I always wondered did JR push you?"

"What do you think?" Pam asked

Sue Ellen sighed "We both know what JR was like back then….he was in competition with Bobby for his father's affection and he wanted the first son but I'd like to think he didn't push you"

Pam smiled "I wanted some time alone so I went up to the barn loft. JR must have wanted the same because about ten minutes later he was there. He was drunk and just mumbling things…he was barely making sense. I stood up, I began to feel scared but he was blocking my way so I couldn't escape…anyway as he moved closer I moved backwards and before both of us knew it I was at the edge and fell. So no, JR never pushed me"

"Looking back at those years….I hate the people that JR and I were, I remember asking him if he was sorry that you lost the baby, he didn't answer, he didn't need to I saw it in his eyes and to be honest part of me was please that you wouldn't be giving Jock the first grandchild. All the times I was horrible to you, I remember one night after you and Bobby found me passed out when I was pregnant with John Ross, you stayed with me until I fell asleep then after you had looked after John Ross when I couldn't the moment I held him I made sure you knew he wasn't yours and yet when I left JR and needed your help to get John Ross you were there for me" Sue Ellen said

"I'd sooner have him with you than JR" Pam replied "Having said that the past is a foreign country that it's sometimes best not to visit. I seen how both of you have changed this past year….in fact I think I understand why JR behaved the way he did. Always having to win approval it couldn't have been easy especially when Bobby got it without trying"

"I know, now he's devoting his time to his family. He's been so patient and kind during this pregnancy….looking out for me, making sure I'm okay, coming with me to every doctor's appointment and putting up with my eating habits" Sue Ellen said "He's massaged my back when I've got backache and my feet when they're swollen, he's helped John Ross with his homework, decorated the nursery and tried his best to make up for everything that went wrong with my last pregnancy"

"Cliff wants to know what he's up to….he got a cheque the other day to do with the profits from Ewing 23. He mentioned that JR closed them a few years back and wonders why they've been reopened" Pam said

Sue Ellen laughed "What do you think Cliff would say if he knew the truth….that he had a half brother and that brother was the man he hated most in his life"

Pam laughed "I'm not sure but it's best we keep him in the dark"

JR walked into Southfork and into the living room, seeing Sue Ellen and Pam he walked over to Sue Ellen and planted a kiss on her lips.

"Hey you're home early" Sue Ellen said

"Yeah…quiet day at the office so I thought I'd give myself the rest of the day off" JR said "Don't let that stop you talking about me though"

Pam laughed "You've got some ego JR, what makes you think you're the topic of conversation"

"I know you two so well" JR said "Well I'm going upstairs to change. Is Clayton in the nursery?"

"He's just putting some finishing touches to it" Sue Ellen said "The boys are upstairs too"

"See you later" JR said

After he had gone Pam said "Is he going to be present at the birth?"

"Yes…although I can't guarantee he'll be conscious for long. He has such a weak stomach"

"How long now"

"Less than a week" Sue Ellen said "Hopefully we're have the babies home by Thanksgiving"

"Mark has agreed to come to Southfork for Thanksgiving. We've also had a long chat about Christopher he wants to adopt him before the baby comes then both children will have the same surname. You wouldn't have any objection to that"

"Pam…Christopher is your son, he's always been yours I gave up any rights I had to him. As for Mark adopting him I think it's a brilliant idea but the one thing I want you to promise me is that you will never tell him that you and Bobby adopted him. I don't want him to know anything about Kristin and how she used him." Sue Ellen said

"Okay" Pam said

Meanwhile upstairs JR and Clayton inspected the work they had done in the nursery.

"Well we made a really good job of this room even if I do say it myself" Clayton said

"The cribs look brilliant and I love how you managed to paint the same scene on them as what's on the wallpaper" JR said

"Sue Ellen looks well…she's blooming" Clayton said

"I know….we've become so close these past few months. I can talk to her about anything and she'll listen to me." JR said

"Glad you've realize what a wonderful wife you've got"

"Part of this scares me though. What if something goes wrong during the birth. Last night I had a nightmare, I dreamt that one of the babies got stuck in the womb and Sue Ellen lost a lot of blood while the doctors tried to release it. They managed to save the baby but not her and I woke up she wasn't there…I panic…for a moment I thought it was real and that she was gone" JR said "Clayton I don't want to lose her"

"You have got the best medical care money can buy…I'm sure everything will be fine. Try not to worry Clayton said "Don't tell me she was having a midnight feast last night"

"Yeah I found her in the kitchen eating Ice cream, bread roll and tomato ketchup" JR said "She made me taste some….I don't know why she likes it so much"

Clayton laughed "Don't worry only a week to go"

JR smiled "Yeah and just think what it's going to be like with three babies in this house and a noisy six year old running around"

"I've never seen John Ross so settled nor have I ever seen you and Sue Ellen so relaxed" Clayton said

**Southfork (A week later)**

JR carried Sue Ellen's bags to his car while she said goodbye to John Ross and the rest of the family. Seeing her so look so small she crouched down to his level.

"Hey I'll be back before you know it, beside when the babies are born Grandma and Clayton will bring you to the hospital" she said

"You're not going to leave me…..uncle Bobby went to hospital and never came back"

Sue Ellen looked at Miss Ellie as tears formed in her eyes "No sweetheart…I'm not going anywhere"

John Ross hugged her tightly. After a few minutes she freed herself from his embrace and stood up hugging Clayton and Miss Ellie.

"See you soon" she said

JR came in from the car and placed his hand on her back "Are you ready?"

Sue Ellen nodded, part of her was afraid not knowing what to expect. JR helped her into the car and they drove to Dallas Memorial and took the elevator up to the maternity unit where the doctor and midwife were waiting for them. Having got Sue Ellen comfortable in her room they proceeded to administer the epidural. A while later they took her down to the theater with JR gripping her hand. They placed a screen between them and JR and Sue Ellen so that neither would see any of the surgery. JR sat on a chair by Sue Ellen reassuring her, stroking her face and reminding her how much he loved her. Within 40 minutes they heard the first sound of a baby's cry.

"It's a girl" The midwife said

"Is she okay" Sue Ellen asked

"She's fine…let me get her cleaned up and then you can hold her before I put her in the incubator"

The doctor's continued working to remove the two remaining babies from the womb while Sue Ellen and JR cuddled their first newborn daughter.

"She's perfect" JR said "Just like her momma"

Sue Ellen placed her finger in the baby's mouth and the baby started sucking "She's hungry" Sue Ellen laughed

The nurse took the baby and put her in the incubator.

"She'll be nice and warm in there"

"How long will she have to stay in there?" JR asked

"Until she reaches a normal weight but at the moment she's 4lb which means she's in no danger"

"John Ross was smaller than that" Sue Ellen said

Their conversation was interrupted by the sound of another cry. This time it was a baby boy then about ten minutes later another girl was born. The doctors then finished working on Sue Ellen by closing up the wound they had made. After their work was done they left the couple alone for a moment.

"We've done it" JR said "We have three beautiful healthy babies"

"You're not disappointed that there's only one boy" Sue Ellen asked

JR kissed her "Of course not! You are something else do you know that….you are the most amazing person I know"

"Is John Ross outside?" Sue Ellen asked as the doctors came back in the room

"Yes" JR said, he then asked the doctor if it would be okay for him to bring his son into the theatre. Having got the doctor's approval JR went outside where Miss Ellie and Clayton were waiting. On seeing his father John Ross ran to him and JR scooped him up.

"Hey Buddy…your momma wants to see you"

"How is Sue Ellen?" Miss Ellie asked "And the babies"

"They're fine" JR said "Just let me take John Ross in and you con come in a while"

JR turned to go back in when Clayton called him back

"Well what did you have" he laughed

"Two girls and a boy" JR said smiling.

JR carried John Ross into the room and placed him on the bed with his mother. Sue Ellen kissed him and pointed towards the incubators.

"Say hello to your new brother and sisters John Ross" she said

John Ross climbed off the bed and walked over to them. "They're tiny…why are they in here"

JR walked to him and picked him up "You were once like that too" he said "They won't be little for long"

The doctors and midwife then told JR that they would be moving the babies into the Special Care Unit and Sue Ellen to the ward. JR and John Ross went outside to wait with Miss Ellie and Clayton. When the babies were settled into the Special Care Unit JR took them to see them. Miss Ellie cooed at how lovely they were and how healthy they looked. Clayton noticed JR beaming as he held John Ross. Finally they went to see Sue Ellen. The family chatted together for a while, John Ross sat snuggled up to his mother while JR sat on a chair close to her, holding her hand.

"Those babies will be home in no time" Miss Ellie said "They beautiful just like John Ross"

"They're a lot healthier than John Ross was" Sue Ellen said "And we had him home in a fortnight..I guess thanksgiving is going to be a bit lively this year"

"Speaking of Thanksgiving, JR is it still okay if Dusty comes I can put him off if you want" Clayton said

JR looked at Sue Ellen, just at the moment the only thing that mattered in his life was her and his children "No Clayton it's fine….maybe it will be okay if he sees that Sue Ellen is happy"

Clayton looked at Sue Ellen and knew without a doubt that she was happy. Her eyes were sparkling and there was a glow around her. Miss Ellie looked at the clock on the wall.

"I think it's time we let you rest" she said "JR do you want us to take John Ross"

JR looked at his son "No momma…he's fine I'll bring him home with me"

Miss Ellie and Clayton kissed Sue Ellen goodbye and left. After they were gone JR looked at his wife. "Okay what are we going to call these children?"

"Well I thought we decided on Sophie Eleanor and Aaron Southworth for sure" Sue Ellen said

"We need another girl's name" JR said

"Emily Grace" Sue Ellen said

"Didn't you say your grandmother's name was Alice" JR said

"Yeah and it's also my mother's middle name"

"Okay then how about Emily Alice" JR said

"What do you think John Ross?" Sue Ellen said

"I like it momma, when can I hold them" their son asked

"Soon I promise" JR said

As time went by John Ross began to get sleepy; Sue Ellen pulled him closer to her and wrapped him in a warm embrace; JR didn't want to leave this evening and prayed the nurses would let him stay. He watched as his son slept in his wife's arms.

"JR" Sue Ellen said

JR smiled "What"

"I want you" she said "Take off your shoes and climb in here with us….I need you to keep us warm and safe"

JR went to the door of the room to check that noone was around then did as Sue Ellen asked. Although they were squashed on the single bed they were wrapped in a warm and safe cocoon, JR kept watch as the two people he loved most slept then finally he gave into sleep himself.


	9. Chapter 9

**Dallas Memorial Hospital**

JR woke up the following morning to find Sue Ellen watching him.

"Hey" He smiled "Shouldn't you be asleep?"

Sue Ellen laughed "I was just enjoying watching you and our son sleeping; you both look so angelic and peaceful"

JR kissed her "That's because we are"

Sue Ellen smiled "Do you know you sleep with the same expression on your faces, you both bite down on your lower lip as though you're deep in thought"

"How are you feeling?" JR asked

"Tired, sore but happy…I can't wait to see the babies"

"All in good time…you know yesterday was the most amazing experience I have ever had. Holding your hand and watching as the doctors removed the babies from you, then holding our first newborn daughter; it just felt so incredible"

Sue Ellen smiled "What even better than an oil strike"

JR moved closer to her and gently kissed her forehead "Yes…even better than an oil strike"

"You don't mind having two daughters?"

"Of course not…however once they reach 13 I'm thinking of locking them both in their bedrooms until they're 50" he replied "I seem to remember the trouble momma and daddy had trying to keep Lucy in order when she was a teenager"

"I'd love to see you try" she laughed "I was thinking…how about Aaron's name"

"What about it?"

Sue Ellen thought for a moment "How about we called him Aaron Clayton Southworth Ewing?"

JR smiled "Hmmm I was wondering when that was going to come up…after all I know you think of him as a father"

"So what do you soy?"

JR kissed her "That's fine….it's funny but these past few months I seem to have grown closer to him then I ever was to Jock. We've spent quite a bit of time together whether it's been taking the boys fishing or decorating the nursery"

"I have noticed" Sue Ellen said "Although I'm slightly worried about Thanksgiving especially with Dusty coming down"

"Sue Ellen I'm not going to cause trouble" JR said

"I know you won't but something inside me doesn't trust him to use what Clayton told him against you and then you know the truth about his own parentage…."

"We'll face that when we have to but I will promise you one thing whatever he says I will never use his parentage as a form of attack. I know it will upset you and it will also upset momma and Clayton." JR said "He can say what he likes I don't care….the truth is I've got you and he hasn't and that's all that matters to me"

"Okay and I had another thought I want to change one of our daughter's name from Emily to Kaitlin"

JR laughed "You are so indecisive Mrs. Ewing…what am I going to do with you"

"Well I always wanted to call my daughter Katie but I realized that as Katie is short for Katherine there was no way we could call her that however I thought we could call her Katilin and Katie for short…Emily just sounds so old fashioned"

"Kaitlin Alice…hmm I like that" JR said

"Are you sure JR…are you really happy I mean is this what you really want"

JR kissed her "Hey where is this coming from?" JR looked at John Ross "You know laying here and holding you two all night has been brilliant. I knew after the babies were born I wasn't going back to Southfork last night and I wanted John Ross with us"

"He hasn't stirred all night long. He's been so good" Sue Ellen said

"Actually I think it's time we got up and had some breakfast…I wonder if the canteen is open"

"Hospital food…you must be hungry"

John Ross opened his eyes and smiled at his parents watching him "Momma, daddy…where are we?"

"Hey we're in the hospital with your momma…don't you remember?" JR said

"I forgot….where are the babies?"

"They're in another part of the hospital being taken care of because they're so little" Sue Ellen said

"Can I play with them later" John Ross asked

"They need to grow a little bit but when they come home you can help look after them"

"How about we go and get some food" JR said

"Yes" John Ross replied

JR got out of bed and put his jacket and shoes on "So my darling, can I bring you back anything…like ice cream and tomato ketchup!" he laughed

"NO" Sue Ellen said "That's disgusting…can't believe I ate that"

JR laughed "Come on son…let's go and get something to eat"

Half an hour later Miss Ellie and Clayton walked into Sue Ellen's room.

"How are you?" Miss Ellie asked

"A bit sore…but other than that I'm fine" Sue Ellen replied"

"I called your mother last night. She said she'll come in and see you this afternoon" Miss Ellie said

"Thank you" Sue Ellen said "Wonder if she will stop going on all her cruises now and start to get to know her grandchildren"

"Speaking of which…when do we get to see our new grandchildren?" Clayton asked

"Soon, hopefully they're be home by Thanksgiving"

"That's still two weeks away" Clayton said "Well I'll let you two ladies talk while I go and find JR and John Ross"

Miss Ellie sat on a chair next to Sue Ellen's bed "So how did my son enjoy yesterday. We both know he's squeamish"

Sue Ellen laughed "He was great. He just held my hand and spoke words of encouragement, then when they put the first baby in his arms…well I wished I had a camera…because the look on his face was amazing"

"You've come a long way this year…I never thought I would see the day when you two were settled as a family"

"I have what I've always wanted, JR and this time he kept his promise and made a real commitment to our marriage"

"I sometimes wonder how he would have turned out if Digger had brought him up instead of Jock. I mean let's face it Jock brought him up to be a cruel uncaring man devoid of any emotions who only care was for the business"

Sue Ellen laughed "He comes across like that….but there's a different JR, a JR that has a vulnerable side. That night you told him about Digger…he walked out and you said he would be fine….I knew he wouldn't be… I found him in the treehouse sobbing his heart out. I think this has made us closer; we've talked so much about our childhoods and how we want our children brought up. He still visits Digger's grave…I'm just hoping that Cliff never turns up at the same time"

"Clayton heard from Dusty last night he's coming down for Thanksgiving; he wasn't sure if he could make it at first. Will your mother be joining us?"

"Well if you don't mind, I'm sure she'd love to spend it with her grandchildren"

"No that's fine…Pam and Mark are coming so there will be a house full, and you know how much I love seeing Southfork full"

"We're giving Aaron the second name of Clatyon" Sue Ellen said "So his full name is gong to be Aaron Clayton Southworth Ewing"

"That's a bit of a mouthful" Miss Ellie said "I noticed the change in Clayton and JR's relationship…they're no longer fighting"

"JR was saying earlier how he's spent more time these past few months doing things with Clayton that he never did with Jock."

"I remember when those two first met"

"Well it wasn't under very friendly circumstances…I mean I had taken JR's son and gone to live with Clayton's son. JR told him he'd destroy him unless he threw me and our son off the ranch to which Clayton told him to basically get lost"

" I remember how JR used me to get John Ross away from you" Miss Ellie said

"But you didn't play along…you gave him back to me even though you knew Jock would want him at Southfork. Why?"

"Because John Ross needed you more than he needed JR; I knew that JR would get fed up looking after him and leave it to me and I wasn't prepared to bring up another grandchild, but more than that I wasn't going to allow another mother to have her child removed from her by the Ewings…I made that mistake with Valene, I was damn sure I wasn't going to do the same thing with you"

Meanwhile JR and Clayton sat chatting in the canteen.

"So how is Sue Ellen this morning?" Clayton asked

"She's fine…I don't think I slept much last night though, I just lay there holding her and our son in my arms, listening to her breathing" JR said "It must have been three o'clock before I drifted off! and I woke up to her watching me sleep"

"You're not still worried about that dream you had the other night?

JR laughed "I guess I was…..I just wanted to make sure she was okay"

"When can we see the babies?"

"John Ross and I looked in on them before we came down here…they're so tiny even smaller than John Ross was. I guess we can go and see them before you go home"

"Sue Ellen's mother is going to be here this afternoon. Miss Ellie phoned her last night "

"Hmm I'm still not convinced she's happy about us being back together"

"Well let's face it….things were really bad when she was here after Bobby's death. Sue Ellen in the sanitarium"

"Don't remind me" JR said "I still feel so guilty about that time….I pushed her over the edge after John Ross' operation and after Bobby died….things just went downhill"

"She's much stronger than any of us thought" Clayton said

"I know…when my whole world came down she was there to build it back up…and when I think back over the years she has always been my greatest ally"

"Why don't we go back upstairs?" Clayton said

The three of them went back upstairs into Sue Ellen's room, half an hour later Miss Ellie and Clayton left. JR looked at Sue Ellen and seeing how tired she looked decided that maybe he and John Ross should let her rest.

"Don't go" Sue Ellen said

"Honey…we're just going back to Southfork to have a shower and change then I'll be right back…beside your momma will be here soon and I'm sure she'd like some time alone with you"

"Bored of me already"

JR laughed "Never…I'll be back soon I promise"

JR and John Ross kissed her before leaving, after hearing the door shut Sue Ellen lay down in the bed and drifted off to sleep. She was awoken a few hours later by the sound of her mother's voice.

"Hi Momma" she said sitting up in bed

"Hi darlin' how are you feeling?"

"Tired…but happy…did you look in the nursery at the triplets"

"No not yet…Miss Ellie told me that you had two girls and a boy"

"Yes…I think it's what we both wanted now our family is even…two boys and two girls…everything is perfect"

Patricia Shepard looked at her daughter wondering whether everything was perfect or whether this was Sue Ellen trying to make things perfect. Her thoughts went back to the time shortly after Bobby's death when she has arrived back in Dallas to find her daughter in the sanitarium. There had been nothing but animosity between Sue Ellen and JR during that time, in fact JR wasn't hiding the fact that he was seeing another woman. She didn't want this kind of life for her daughter, she didn't want her daughter married to JR.

"Momma we've already named them"

Patricia smiled "What did you call them"

"Well the girls are Sophie Eleanor and Kaitlin Alice and the boy is Aaron Clayton Southworth"

"Aaron…Sue Ellen that's not after your daddy?"

"No momma…it's after JR's grandfather…I forgot that was also daddy's name"

"You surprise me you were always daddy's little girl"

Sue Ellen went quiet "I know…JR and I talked a lot about our childhood when we were on holiday….remember the time we buried you in the sand and you complained all afternoon, when we finished daddy took me for an ice cream and we came back and ate it in front of you"

Yes I remember…you always were like your father even when he wasn't around. Kristin was more like me but you are your father's daughter"

"In more ways than one" Sue Ellen said

"Darlin' I've been thinking….about you and JR"

"What about him"

"While I've been on holiday…you have been in my thoughts a lot. I know I haven't been the perfect mother but I did love you and I guess I'm just worried about you"

"Momma I'm fine"

"Sue Ellen I saw how you were after Bobby's death…you went through that alcoholic program on your own with no support from JR…he flaunted his girlfriend in front of you and made perfectly clear that he wanted nothing to do with you"

"Momma that's water under the bridge…it's in the past…a lot has happened since then"

"How do you know in a few years time JR wont be bored of playing happy families and some other young pretty thing will attract him and all the hurt and pain will begin again"

"Because we've both changed. We're not the people we were back then"

"Sue Ellen…I want us to take the triplets and leave Dallas…bring them up between us without any influence from the Ewings. We can leave John Ross with JR..he's already under his father's influence and I know he wouldn't come with us but the babies are different...maybe one day you'll find someone who will treat you better than JR"

"Momma I can't do that….not to JR and most certainly not to John Ross."

"Sue Ellen…how can you stay with a man that has constantly cheated on you, abused you and treated you like you're nothing?"

"Momma I love him and he loves me and we both love our children. We're raising them together and if you stay in Dallas you will see that nothing will ever change that"

Patricia shook her head "Something else you share with you father…stubbornness"

"Momma….please be happy for me….I've finally have the only man I've ever truly loved and I know he loves me"

"Are you sure"

"Positive...now are you going to stay in Dallas"

Patricia smiled "I might do"

Their conversation was interrupted by the door opening.

"JR…you're back…where's John Ross"

"Well he wanted to go and tell Christopher all about his new brother and sisters so I dropped him at Pam's and she said she'll bring him home in the morning"

"I'll leave you two alone" Patricia said "Goodbye darlin' she said kissing Sue Ellen on the forehead

"Bye momma"

Patricia looked at JR but said nothing and walked to the door, before walking out she looked at the couple. They looked so happy and she prayed that this time it would last.

"Ouch" JR said "If looks could kill…"  
Sue Ellen laughed and kissed him "I love you…you do know that don't' you"

"Of course and I love you too…more than life itself…what's wrong"

"Momma…she's not happy with us being together"

"I thought she was okay before we went on holiday"

"She's been thinking a lot while she's been away. She wants me to take the triplets and leave Dallas with her. Bring them up between us. She thinks that as long as you have John Ross you'll be content with that"

"Like hell" JR said "Sue Ellen I'm not going to let her drive a wedge between us…we are going to bring our children up together, as a loving partnership…when you took me back I made a solemn vow to you…to love you forever and stay faithful to you and I intend to do that to my dying day….don't ever leave me"

Sue Ellen stroked his face "I love you so much…you're stuck with me I'm not going anywhere"

"But your mother will try and convince you otherwise"

"No she wont…beside you don't think I would put the girls through the childhood I went through…..to be brought up to believe that the most important thing in life is money and securing a rich husband, anyway JR we made a promise to each other that we would learn from the mistakes of our parents and bring our children up to feel loved and secure"

JR kissed her tenderly on the lips holding her closely making sure she knew that he would never let her go. After a while Sue Ellen suggested they go and see the babies.

JR beamed with pride as he touched his children through the incubators, their tiny fingers so small as he gently took them in his palm.

"I can't believe how tiny they are"

"But perfect…just like their big brother"

"John Ross" JR smiled "Do you realize that that child has always been the glue that binds us…no matter how far apart we were he was what always brought us back together. Even this last time I made him a promise that he would have a mom and dad who loved each other and I would make everything perfect for him"

"John Ross is so precious…..do you realize almost every time we have a conversation about the children it always comes back to him…we waited so long for him and he's the most important part of our lives and that is why I know that he will never experience what you went through JR…we will always have time for him"

"Earlier today when momma and Clayton were making a fuss of the triplets I just held John Ross tightly in my arms just to make sure he didn't feel threatened!"

"I don't think he does feel threatened….he's just looking forward to having them home so that he can play with them"

JR looked at his twin daughters "You know….I think these two are identical….absolutely beautiful just like their momma"

"And our son is just like you and John Ross"

"Can't wait for the next one" JR laughed.

Two weeks later, Sue Ellen and JR finally had their family home. Dusty has arrived early for Thanksgiving and the family enjoyed a rather subdued dinner, JR feeling uncomfortable having to sit at the table with the cowboy, knowing how he felt about Sue Ellen. Later that evening JR was in the nursery checking on the triplets when Dusty walked in. JR looked up at the sound of footsteps.

"What do you want Farlow?"

"Just wondering how long this playing of happy families is going to last"

"It's not an act, Sue Ellen's happy…she has everything she ever wanted"

"I sincerely doubt that" Dusty said "In fact I'm willing to bet that I could make her come back to me anytime I want to"

"Don't be so sure of that"

Sue Ellen heard voices and stood listening by the door

"JR…don't forget she left you for me….even though I was in a wheelchair and incapable of making love to her she still chose me over you…..she loves me, I'm the only man who ever truly loved her"

"Farlow…you chose the rodeo over her…in fact you did it twice"

"A mistake….I won't be doing that again…I plan on relieving you of this little family…I want to show Sue Ellen that I'm ready to settle down and want her and her children"

"It'll be a cold day in hell before I let that happen"

"Let's face it JR..you're nothing but a bastard….a Barnes' Bastard…you're daddy was the local drunk not the great Jock Ewing…you're nothing"

JR felt himself tense up, he so wanted to beat the life out of this cowboy but knew he couldn't. Sue Ellen sensed the tension in the room and walked in.

"JR why don't you go and check on John Ross" she said "He's ready for you to read him a story"

JR looked from her to Dusty…unable to read what Sue Ellen was thinking, feeling a little scared that Dusty was right and she would leave him. Sue Ellen touched his hand as he walked past her, for a moment their eyes locked, JR breathed a sigh of relief at what she silently said to him. When they were alone Dusty looked at her

"You look beautiful"

"Thankyou" she said "What was all that about?"

"JR just starting trouble….you know what he's like, how have you been?"

"I've been fine, Dusty"

"Sue Ellen come away with me"

"I don't think so….you see I heard what you said to JR and there's a slight problem. JR is right I love him and there is no way that I'm going to leave him or even take his children away from him."

"You can't love him…he's a lying cheating bastard….how many times has he destroyed you""

"It's in the past" Sue Ellen said

"You told me you loved me….you once told me that your life had been a mockery until you met me and that all you wanted was for us to be together"

"I thought I loved you….you made me feel so special but if I'm honest the only man I've ever truly loved is JR…he's what I want him and our children"

"Is that why you didn't come away with me last time because you wanted to get back with JR"

"No…I wanted to be close to John Ross…Dusty the one thing I will never do is desert my children…maybe if you had stayed in Dallas things would have been different I don't know"

"But we could get back what we once had"

"You're not listening to me, I love my husband more than anything in this world and I'm not leaving him"

"Tell me you don't feel anything for me"

"Sorry I love you as a friend but that's it…JR has my heart he always had…it's just taken us a long time to realize that we're in fact married to the people we want to be with"

Dusty looked at her and in her eyes he saw the truth. He had lost her for good, silently he walked past her, he needed to get out of Southfork. Sue Ellen watched him walk away, she never wanted to hurt him but knew that whatever feelings she had for him were gone. She walked over to the cribs and looked at the babies peacefully sleeping. She gently stroked the face of one of her daughters and smiled, nothing was more important than her family. After a while she walked out of the nursery and into John Ross' room and sat on the bed listening to JR read his son a story, for a moment JR looked at her and reached out his hand to her, taking it she moved closer to him. After turning off John Ross' light they went into their own room. Sue Ellen put her arms around JR and kissed him.

"Guess he didn't talk you into leaving me then?" JR said

Sue Ellen laughed "Why would I leave I have everything I want in this house, in this room"

"If there's one person that I thought could take you away from me it would be him"

"No….I love you and only you" she replied "I'm also proud of you"

"Why?"

"Because when he flung the fact that Digger was your father and not Jock you didn't inform him that at least you knew who your father was"

"Well…that would upset Clayton and I still have to live in this house with him after Dusty has gone beside I knew that would upset you too"

Sue Ellen kissed him "The only thing you have to believe in is that I love you, I always have and I always will and nothing will ever change that. For the last eight months since we got back together we have been happy, you've been faithful, loving and attentive and all I want to do is make sure that you know that your family love you…forget the past JR and let's move on. The future is secure…our love will last forever I promise…nobody will ever separate us again"

JR pulled her to him and held her tightly, knowing that everything she said was true.

Meanwhile at the Cattlemen's club, Dusty drowned his sorrows, staring at the empty glass he ordered another drink. Looking around he saw Cliff Barnes seated at a table. An evil thought suddenly came to him and he walked over.

"Well Barnes what do you think of your new half brother"

Cliff looked up "Farlow…you're drunk"

"hmm maybe but that doesn't change anything…guess you haven't heard the news" looking around him he saw the bar was full of oil people.

"Listen up everyone…we all know that JR Ewing is a complete bastard but recently it has been discovered that he's a bastard in more ways than one….his father wasn't Jock Ewing after all"

"What do you mean?" Cliff said

"JR's father wasn't Jock Ewing it was Digger Barnes"

Meanwhile at another table, a young man stayed hidden waiting for the ruckus to stop, silently he thought about the information that had just been given to everyone in the club that night…this could make big news and maybe might help his career as a journalist. When everything had quietened down he walked over to the cowboy.

"Hi" he said "My name is Nick James and I'm with the Dallas Star…what you were saying back there is it true"

Dusty Farlow looked at the young man standing before him

"Just give me the details of what you know…I'll make it worth your while…this story could be huge if it's true"

"Oh it's true" Dusty said "The great JR Ewing, the illegitimate son of a drunk"

"How do you know?" Nick James asked "I mean what proof have you got"

"My father is married to his mother"

"How much will it cost for you to tell me everything?"

Dusty thought for a moment. The look on JR's face when he read about his mother's secret in the paper was worth more than money.

"Okay why don't you buy me a drink and I'll tell you what I know"

Nick James went and ordered two drinks at the bar while Dusty found them a secluded booth so that they could talk without being overheard. His mind was racing thinking about how to start the story. When Nick was seated he began.

"This goes back to about six months ago when a ranch worker began working at Southfork. His name was Ben Stivers. Well strange things started to happen, first of all a watch turned up on Bobby's grave and then a picture of Digger Barnes and Miss Ellie…."

"Who told you this?"

"My father…a few months ago we were together at the Southern Cross…he and Miss Ellie were having problems and he confided in me"

"Okay..carry on"

"Where was I…oh yes well one day Miss Ellie wandered into his room, looking for him and Clayton but came across old letters and items belonging to Jock…Stivers revealed to her that they were his belongings and he was Jock."

"That was quite a statement after all the man has been dead for four years"

"Well…noone believed him…JR wanted blood tests done but Miss Ellie argued against it, she didn't want the scandal. It caused a rift between the family, miss Ellie was adamant and then one night she revealed to my dad that Jock wasn't JR's father and Digger was"

"Does JR know?"

"Yes he walked in on his mother telling my father"

"How did he take the news?"

"From what my father said he was pretty devastated, it caused no end of friction at Southfork which is one of the reasons my father left to go to the Southern Cross, just to get away from things"

"Is Ben Stivers still around?"

"I'm not sure…I haven't spoken to my father about it since I've been in Dallas…but I get the feeling he's gone"

"So you don't know if he's Jock or not?"

"Well put it this way…Miss Ellie and my father are still together"

"Hmm that's a very interesting story….look I've got to get going…see if my editor will go with this"

"Front page news" Dusty said "I mean everyone loves a scandal"

**Southfork**

JR and Clayton sat in the nursery soothing the cries of the triplets while Sue Ellen and Miss Ellie were downstairs in the kitchen preparing the bottles.

"You need three pairs of hands with these three" JR laughed

"Well you knew it would be hard work" Clayton said "One baby is bad enough but you never do anything by half"

"Guess I don't, beside I love a challenge"

"I'm sorry about Dusty….I thought once he saw that you and Sue Ellen were happy he'd be okay"

"What I don't understand is that he had his chance. She left me and went to live at the Southern Cross but still once he could walk he chose the rodeo over her; then he went and married someone else"

"That marriage is over…she couldn't compete with Sue Ellen"

"No woman can…believe me"

"When she was at the Southern Cross, I'm not convinced she left you completely"

"What makes you say that?"

"There were times when she looked sad as though living at the Southern Cross wasn't what she wanted. I remember the day you tried to get Miss Ellie to help you get John Ross back on the helicopter…she looked so upset as the helicopter moved off"

"I had just tried to take her son from her" JR said "But she did tell me not so long ago that part of her had wanted to go home with me. Clayton I can't explain Sue Ellen and my relationship….there were times when we hated each other and yet there were times when we couldn't get enough of being together…..I don't know why she keeps coming back to me after everything I've put her through but she does and thankfully John Ross is the tie that binds us. To be honest I think if it hadn't of been for John Ross, she would have left with Dusty the last time he was here"

"I can't see Sue Ellen enjoying the rodeo circuit to be honest" Clayton said

JR laughed "No…not much chance for shopping!"

Sue Ellen and Miss Ellie walked back upstairs and into the nursery.

"Okay what are you two plotting?" Miss Ellie asked

"Nothing" JR said

Sue Ellen walked over to JR and lifted one of her baby daughters out of his arms and gave her to Miss Ellie.

"Right…let's get these three fed so that we can't go to bed before they decide they're hungry again"

Clayton fed the little boy while Sue Ellen and JR fed their other daughter together. Miss Ellie watched and smiled at the closeness of the couple. After feeding the triplets Miss Ellie and Clayton went to bed while Sue Ellen and JR stayed and watched their children drift to sleep.

"I can't believe how much they've grown in two weeks" JR said

"Yeah…all that worrying you did during the early stages of the pregnancy was all for nothing. I told you everything would be fine"

JR smiled "Yeah it is…well almost"

"What do you mean?"

"Let's face it we've got two people here at Thanksgiving who would love us to split up. Your momma wants you to take the triplets and live with her while that cowboy wants you to take all the children and live with him"

"And neither of them are going to win" Sue Ellen said kissing him

**Pam's House**

Pam answered her front door to find her brother on her doorstep

"Hi Cliff…what brings you here this early in the morning?"

"I need to ask you something"

"What?"

"You still see the Ewings, I mean you know what's happening with them"

"I'm spending Thanksgiving with them"

"Dusty Farlow was at the Cattlemen's club last night…he must have had a row with JR because he was drunk….he also said a few things about JR"

"Go on"

"He said that Jock wasn't JR's father"

"Cliff…be serious Dusty is just jealous of the fact that JR has Sue Ellen and he doesn't. Who did he say was JR's father then?"

"That's the problem…he told the entire Club that Digger was"

Pam laughed "Well I can just see JR's reaction if that was true…he'd self destruct..Cliff do you really want to stand on the doorstep discussing this or would you like to come inside?"

Cliff thought for a moment "No…I've got work to do"

"Don't worry about JR…I'm sure it's not true"

Pam watched her brother leave then shut the door behind her. Mark was standing in the hallway holding the morning newspaper.

"I take it he's heard the news?"

"What?" Pam asked "There was some trouble down at the Cattlemen's last night. Dusty Farlow stirring up trouble"

"You haven't seen the morning newspaper then?"

Pam took the paper. She closely scanned the headline "Oh my god…I can't believe the Dallas News printed this without confirmation"

"Apparently Dusty told the reporter that he heard the news from Clayton so I guess they thought it was okay to print"

"Poor Miss Ellie…this is one scandal she could do without"

"There's no proof Pam…it's his word against the Ewings."

"I'm going to go to Southfork after breakfast…check Miss Ellie is okay"

**Southfork**

JR sat at the breakfast table and picked up the paper, seeing the headlines he gasped in horror.

"Damn" he said "Clayton you're son has just made the biggest mistake of his life"

Sue Ellen looked at him; she hadn't seen him look so angry in ages. "JR…what's wrong?"

JR handed her the paper, got up from his seat and walked into the den. Sue Ellen glanced at the headlines that had bothered JR.

"Oh my god no…what the hell was he thinking of?"

"Sue Ellen what is it?" Clayton asked

"JR Ewing…the illegimate son of Digger Barnes by his stepbrother, what on earth made him say that…I know he was hurt because I wouldn't go with him, but to say this in the middle of a crowded bar"

"Sue Ellen I'm sorry I should never have told him about JR and Digger…this is my fault" Clayton said

"Well you should have know better than to say anything to your son" Miss Ellie remarked "You knew he'd use it against JR"

"I was upset…I needed someone to talk, hell my own wife didn't want me around her. What I said to him was in confidence and he knew it"

"Miss Ellie…fighting among ourselves isn't going to solve this…I'm going to find JR"

Sue Ellen headed into the house and towards the den, knowing that JR was probably on the phone to Harve Smithfield trying to file a lawsuit against both Dusty and the Dallas News. Something struck her…she knew that JR would do anything he could to make Dusty pay for this but just at the moment all she cared about was JR which proved to her that whatever she felt for Dusty was not as strong as what she felt for JR. Not finding him in the den she wandered upstairs. She heard a soft voice coming from the nursery and saw JR with his back to her holding one of the triplets., gently stroking it back. She stood watching them for a while.

"Hey" she said

JR turned around and smiled "How long have you been there?"

"Not long…went to look for you in the den but you weren't there!"

"No…I came up here and this one was awake so I picked her up before she woke the other two"

Sue Ellen walked towards them "I'm sorry"

"It's not your fault…but I'm not sure how to deal with it"

"What do you want to do?"

"Basically kick his backside out of Dallas, sue him for every penny he has until he's crawling in the mud begging for mercy"

Sue Ellen smiled "What's stopping you"

"You are….I know if I go after him…you'll hate me for it also there's momma and Clayton to consider, so I can't do anything"

Sue Ellen kissed him "Darlin' you know the great JR Ewing has never allowed anyone or anything to step in his way before"

"What are you saying?"

"Why change the habits of a lifetime…if I were you I'd be after his blood too, in fact I'm going to be having words with him when he shows up here that's if I get to him before you"

"So you don't mind what I do"

"There are two conditions JR"

"Okay"

"One…you don't blame Clayton…he was going through a bad time and needed someone to talk to ideally it would have been better to be someone else and two…you don't use his parentage because that will hurt Clayton too"

"Fine"

Sue Ellen laughed "Beside I shouldn't imagine that you're going to be the only one suing him…I mean I'm sure Cliff isn't going to be too please with what's in that paper"

"No…he's probably going to be suing both Dusty and the paper for defamation of character…I mean just imagine Digger Barnes the real father of JR Ewing, the paper might have well have said that Digger was the father of Satan"


End file.
